Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi all! We have been experiencing an issue on site where threads have been missing the latest postings. The platform host Vanilla are working on this issue. A workaround that has been used by some is to navigate back from 1 to 10+ pages to re-sync the thread and this will then show the latest posts. Thanks, Mike.
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

Things you want to say to husband/boyf/ex's/friends/family/people *MOD NOTE POST #1*

12021232526137

Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Dear IHeartChemistry,

    You're gonna know who I am two lines into this...

    You know I love you so so much. But you have no idea why I can be so hard on you at times. But it's because I love you :( I worry. I worry so so much that one day I'm gonna get a phonecall that you're not gonna be here anymore.
    You know what I've been through, You know how I felt after I lost mine and E's baby. I felt like there was no tomorrow. You had all that stuff going on when you didn't speak to me for ages. But I still thought about you and still worried. That's how losing you would make me feel. Like I'd lost part of me. Even wonder why I can be such a control freak?? Because I had no control the day that happened and no matter what I do I can't change it or take it back but all I can do is wonder what it would have been like to have someone call me Mom. I need to take control over stuff. It's how I know everything is gonna be ok. I can't deny it, I'm Bat Sh*t crazy and you know I'd openly admit it :P

    I think that you don't realise just how much all of us care. How much it would hurt if you weren't here.

    Most people are stronger than they know. They just forget to believe in it sometimes. <3

    All my love,
    always, regardless of what you think or how much I've shouted at you,

    S

    xxx


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,424 ✭✭✭Storminateacup


    Thank you for not killing me the past few days, I know Im a nightmare at the best of times and you're the only person who can actually handle me when everyone else dispairs. I love you so much and I'm so glad that we are going to spend the rest of our lives together. I'm sorry I slept with the letric blanket on the entire night, i know you got too warm but I was legit frozen. I'm also sorry for what Im about to do, sweetie. You're going to start running with me. It's non negotiable, and we will start soon. I'm doing it because I love you. It will really help when you start back training.

    <3
    xo


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,756 ✭✭✭IHeartChemistry


    proud wrote: »
    Dear IHeartChemistry,

    I know that life has dealt you a rough deal. I know that there are demons that you have to overcome, and I am so proud of you for taking the right steps. You are beautiful, kind, sweet, thoughtful, clever and funny. Your greatest trait is your willingness to do anything to make your friends smile, it's the greatest similarity between you and R. I guess that's why I'm so afraid for you, because you are so like R. When R left us, it took a long time for us to pretend to be okay again, and I especially worried for you. You have the same short temper that she did, the same wit, the same empathy, the thoughtfulness, and the same sense of friendship. Because I see her in you every time that we meet, I am so scared of you ending up like R. You have so many similarities to her, and I enjoy it, but I couldn't handle any more. I am glad that you are starting to feel better, and I'm glad that you finally realise how much you mean to me, and I consider myself so very lucky to have you in my life. I told you I'd never forgive you if you ended it all, and I know you don't want to piss me off :P I hope all the time that you can be happy, and think about you more than you can imagine. But for now, I have stopped being afraid. I know that for you, the only way is up. You're such an amazing person, that it would be an unthinkable loss for the world to lose you before it has gotten to know you. I know you've started to feel better in yourself, and you know how great you are. Don't ever feel guilty for your new found confidence. Work it. You deserve it so much.

    Yours,

    A friend X
    Dear IHeartChemistry,

    You're gonna know who I am two lines into this...

    You know I love you so so much. But you have no idea why I can be so hard on you at times. But it's because I love you :( I worry. I worry so so much that one day I'm gonna get a phonecall that you're not gonna be here anymore.
    You know what I've been through, You know how I felt after I lost mine and E's baby. I felt like there was no tomorrow. You had all that stuff going on when you didn't speak to me for ages. But I still thought about you and still worried. That's how losing you would make me feel. Like I'd lost part of me. Even wonder why I can be such a control freak?? Because I had no control the day that happened and no matter what I do I can't change it or take it back but all I can do is wonder what it would have been like to have someone call me Mom. I need to take control over stuff. It's how I know everything is gonna be ok. I can't deny it, I'm Bat Sh*t crazy and you know I'd openly admit it :P

    I think that you don't realise just how much all of us care. How much it would hurt if you weren't here.

    Most people are stronger than they know. They just forget to believe in it sometimes. <3

    All my love,
    always, regardless of what you think or how much I've shouted at you,

    S

    xxx

    To those two posters,

    Thanks <3

    xxxxxx


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 711 ✭✭✭dammitjanet


    Dear cancer,

    Some people are off limits. Back the f*&k off.
    You've taken too many already. Leave this one alone.

    Dammitjanet


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    I'm doing alot better, and I will be ok, but I just need you to understand that I'm still trying...it doesn't come easy yet. It's hard for me. It's something I want, and that's why I want to get past this, but it's still something that's going to take time. I can't go from zero to ten that quickly. The way you dismissed that really threw me, it was hard to hear, I thought you understood and now I'm worried that you don't. I'm worried about how you really see me and what you really think of me. I'm not weak, I'm not a weak person, but I can't magically fix this either and I just hope you care enough to stick around while I'm trying to. I really hope you do...because I care.

    I should tell you this in person, but I'm scared; I'm scared that you'll think it's too much effort.

    From, me.
    x


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    I don't understand. I do not understand. You're asking me to understand that you're head-over-heels in love with me, but are still in a relationship with someone else, someone who doesn't know, who you won't break up with for god-knows-how-long, if ever, and who goodness knows you're probably still sleeping with, but that you're planning to split, at some unknown future time that you won't tell me, so that you can be with me. What kind of thundering gob****e would even pretend to understand that? Ockham's Razor says I'm a mug, and you're a liar.

    I have a lot of questions I need to ask, obviously. If you want to talk, you know where to find me. Facebook, Twitter, email, in person, whatever. I want to talk, soon. This week. I won't be posting in this thread any more, and I'd prefer if you didn't either.

    I still love you, somehow.
    x


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,424 ✭✭✭Storminateacup


    Dear brother.

    You're really not helping my mouse phobia. It might be highly amusing to you, but I can assure you, to anybody with more than half a braincell, it's not at all, not remotely, not in the slightest funny.
    Stop it before I have to write you a note aplogising for killing you.

    Love you,
    your sister.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 50 ✭✭illumi


    Dear blood-relative,

    Just because you're blood-related to me, doesn't mean you can get away with everything you say to me.:mad:
    Now go and bother someone else :mad:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 140 ✭✭PeefsPixie


    Dear Exes in general

    You may have cheated on me multiple time, spreads horrible lies about me, let me put my hand in my pocket far too many times while never repaying the favour and hurt me more times than I can count but im only the better for it. Yes, it still hurts sometimes but I have and will move on to bigger and better things. Sooner or later there'll be someone who will treat me as great as I treated ye, the difference being they and I deserve it. Good luck, you all need it =)


  • Advertisement
  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,822 ✭✭✭sunflower27


    Hey you

    Thank you for restoring my faith. You were so kind and generous it blew me away. You were there there this weekend for something I have been running away from for so long and yet you understood, as best you could.

    Thank you for an amazing weekend ;)

    xx


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,435 ✭✭✭wobblyknees


    Dear ________,

    I want you to know that although at times you might feel lonely, you aren't alone. Although it might feel at times that you have left your whole life behind you, there is a whole other new life out there for you to build. Try to remember that in the past when you did not treat yourself with the respect you deserved it was because of reasons beyond your control and that you are now a much stronger person, capable of overcoming any problem and achieving anything. Life is far too short and you need learn to love and take care of yourself at all times and be extremely proud of your many achievements. In time, things will get better and before you know it, you will have everything you deserve and more and you will wake up every day with a smile on your face.

    Regards,

    Me.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,194 ✭✭✭saa


    Move out of your mothers, stop giving me solutions just listen.
    Lets just have fun again.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,756 ✭✭✭IHeartChemistry


    I'm desperate and stuck and nobody else is around. I text you asking for help cos I'm scared and having a huge panic attack and just need a shoulder to cry on and support. You cant even reply yet you know I'm in trouble. Shows how gutless you actually are.


  • Registered Users Posts: 215 ✭✭teaholic


    D,

    Dont you regret not giving it a shot? I know I listened to some bad advice about us and as soon as I said it I knew I was wrong.

    Hopefully after silly season is done we can relax and have a bit of fun again but you promised me nothing would change when it came to having a laugh and joke around...

    I suppose I deserve it but it doesn't make it any fairer does it?

    L


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    You know who you are

    Get off your high horse. He knows she cheated on him. You didn't think he knew, he always knew. That's why it all ended. Don't act like he's the bad guy for moving on after.
    Now get your very big nose out of everyone elses business. You're pathetic.


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,770 ✭✭✭Jen Pigs Fly


    Dear all my Exs

    Someday someone will treat me the same way I treated all of you, with love, tust and fidelity. All of your lieing, cheating, two faced-ness, bullsh*t, rumour spreading, using and neglect has only made me appreciate what I didn't have. All of the mental and those few times of physical abuse has only made me stronger, it never broke me like you hoped. I would like to thank you all for showing me who not to go for, and I hope in the future I will use all of you as a base to actually find someone good for me. I do think I deserve it.

    And love is a two way street, however even with love a relationship cannot stand on that alone, we need trust and truthfulness, somthing most of you were never able to give. I was your girlfriend, not a f*ck buddy who was of convienience to you.

    And yes I still have the horse, and yes she will always be my main priority, she has been there for me during times when you have no, an animal who doesn't even know what's going on has more emotional capacity to love and comfort than you.

    -Jenny

    Dear my last Ex

    When my 14 year old cousin died, all I wanted was a hug, instead you went off and got drunk and ignored me all night. I want you to know that the relationship was over from that day you cheated on me right in front of me, but that night, how you treated me sealed the deal. I wish I was brave enough to break up with you sooner, I feel like I've wasted my life.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,016 ✭✭✭lilmissprincess


    Dear You.

    I realise that in my head it all made sense and was totally going to work - but now I'm realising that the thought of us getting back together is still in there. If you don't want me, then stop coming back to me. being my "plaything" will only last for a limited time. I love you, but I love me more.

    L.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13,713 ✭✭✭✭Novella


    U,

    Stop texting me. Stop starting conversations with me every time I'm online. Stop looking at me like that. Stop being so... perfect.

    When I said I would find someone else some day, what made you think it was okay for you to be offended? You had your chance. You had four whole years of chances. It isn't like I never gave you the opportunity to be my someone. You could have been, and you know that.

    You can't be offended. You can't say, "What about my feelings?". What about mine? How do you think I've felt? How do you think I felt when we first met, when we stayed up talking all night, when we hugged and hugged and hugged until we finally kissed? How do you think I felt when you updated your status on Facebook to 'in a relationship' but it wasn't with me?

    Second best. That is always what I've felt like I was to you. That is always what you made me. So don't you dare ask me to consider you, to consider your feelings. You walked all over mine.

    I learned a long time ago to never expect anything from you. That's why I don't call you when I've had a shit day. I don't tell you my big news, I don't share. I think I'd even go so far as to say you don't know me, you haven't for a long time.

    So don't be sad, because you don't miss me. You miss the sex. And honestly, we can both get that elsewhere without the complications.

    S.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,191 ✭✭✭✭Shanotheslayer


    Dear ______


    Thank you for proving to me you weren't different when you said you were. I was a fool for falling for it, but fool me once shame on you fool me twice shame on me. You made the wrong choice when you chose him over me and expected me to wait.

    It was your loss and you will realize that but it will be too little too late.

    Regards,


    _____


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,107 ✭✭✭booboo88


    just fricking grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
    make a bloody decision for once in your life, this whole oh i dont mind what we do, where we go doesnt wash and is head fcuking wrecking.



    rant over


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,600 ✭✭✭Cutie18Ireland


    Dear Noodles,
    I miss you so much already. I am sorry there is nothing more I could have done for you.
    I love you and you will forever have a peace of my heart, my furbaby...


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,016 ✭✭✭Blush_01


    (I warn you, this could be intensely boring!)

    Dude,

    I am actually heartily sick of this rubbish.

    I have liked you for 2 years (exactly 2 years this weekend - and much as I try, it's not going away). I've backed you up when other people wrote you off for being over-the-top and anal. I've supported you, tried to encourage you to have more confidence, tried to make you see where you might have been a bit heavy handed in some situations.

    Despite the fact that I'm mad about you, and you're not in the slightest bit interested, at the same time we have become friends, we're on a team together. Which is why when I speak to you as a friend and ask for an opinion about something, I expect you to respect me enough to listen to what I'm saying and not decide that you're going to beat your chest and fix it, especially when I ask you not to.

    Lets get to the heart of this. I am finding you incredibly frustrating at the moment. You have no clue about delegation - you want to do everything yourself, and it's so wearing. You complain non-stop about people not pulling their weight, and yet you're rubbing the people we work with up the wrong way. We've already lost two people from the team. They both left because of you. I know there's at least two other people who want to leave the team, one has tried and you've refused to let her. You demand so much from people who do things voluntarily, and you don't seem to recognise that you CAN'T demand anything from them. You have to ask, persuade them to get involved, and let them lead the way. Lead from behind - you're pushing people too hard to bend to your will, rather than trying to find common ground.

    Someone who I used to consider one of my best friends barely talks to me now because of you, which is only half because of her own issues. The rest of it is you. This evening, trying to speak with you about a big project we're working on, you were so dismissive. I'm worried about our team. I don't want to be part of the group that brought our section of the organisation down. You're blindly ignorant of the points that are being made by a number of people. I wonder if you'd listen if we were to get someone from outside to talk to you. I don't know how to broach this with you in person, because if you're pissed off you'll dismiss it and you won't listen, and if you're in a good mood you'll dismiss it because you don't see it.

    I don't want to feel like I'm bitching about you. Only one or two people on the team know how I feel about you. And I feel sorry that they do. Believe me, I don't blindly support you, I will pull you up when I think you're wrong. But I think this goes deeper than that. I want to know what your objective for the year is, what your strategy is. You're talking about fixing things, but do you know what aspects of it are broken?

    I am actually starting to despair. I have a lot of things I need to do in my personal life, and I am putting some of them on hold for the sake of the team. I know other people feel the same. But you don't see that for some reason. We all know you're dealing with a fair bit yourself, but you don't seem to recognise that the other people we're working with are human beings who have their own issues.

    I want to sit down and have a proper chat with you, face to face, and see where you think things are going. But instead you are blindly ploughing ahead and I'm afraid you're going to get as disillusioned as the rest of the people we're working with before we can fix things.

    I'm worried about what we can do to fix it. The sub-groups we're working with are fragmented and your focus seems to be on half the groups who are doing ok. You can't take this personally. Just because one group did their own thing a year ago does not mean you can disregard them this year. Just because you feel aggrieved about something does not mean you can let it colour your vision long-term. The people involved have changed, even if the group still has the same structure.

    Look, I've spoken with other people on the team. They feel that things are fractured too. I've given you all the ideas I can give you. I've tried to get you to implement them. It's all been pointless. You won't see what you don't want to see. I can't make you look at things from other perspectives. We desperately need to have a frank think-tank, and without it we might as well all give up.

    My objective is to pass the position I hold on to the next person who undertakes the role in a better position than it was handed to me in. I think I've done that. But I have another 6 months to go before I hand it on, and to be honest I'm worried about what else will be there to be handed over, and who will be there to take it at that point.

    I'm too tired to think more about this anymore at the moment. But we will have to have a frank talk about this soon, before it's too late.

    Blush.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Dear -

    Thank you for not saying 'I told you so'.

    Thank you for caring.

    Thank you for letting me figure it out for myself, and breaking my fall when it all came crashing down.

    And above all else, thank you for being you.

    x


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,109 ✭✭✭sarahbro


    Nan,
    I miss you.
    I miss you.
    I miss you.
    Please come back, I just need one more time to hear your voice again, to smell you, to hug you.
    Please come home.
    I love you forever
    xxxxxxxxx


  • Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 12,705 Mod ✭✭✭✭blue5000


    Hello you,
    I tried texting you earlier but 'message not sent' appeared, I don't know if you've changed your number or left Ireland, so I'm putting it up here;

    It's 11.11 on 11/11/11 and I thought it might be a good time to say hello, how r u? It's been 2 yrs since we spoke and in that time Ive learnt that sometimes its better to walk away. Wishing you all the best and maybe someday we can go for a coffee and a chat:)

    If the seat's wet, sit on yer hat, a cool head is better than a wet ar5e.



  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,185 ✭✭✭tatabubbly


    Dear Mammy,

    Your the best. Thanks. You've made this all bareable.


    I love you

    Tatabubbly


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,016 ✭✭✭lilmissprincess


    Dear M,

    I got told to write you a letter instead of writing on your facebook wall the other day. Its been two years and still all I want is for us to have the chats, over a very milky cup of tea and a bar of Tescos best white chocolate. For you to laugh at me and my love life messes, and for me and you to both make jokes about how ginger men mess up our life. God, I wish it was really that simple.
    Part of me is angry that you left even though I know it wasn't your choice, these things happen. Part of me is angry at me for still feeling like this two years later. Its been two years and I'm all talked out but I'm still a mess and a part of me blames you for this abandonment and all that, and thats terrible and I'm a horrible person to think so. You're so amazing and kind and you brightened up the room by just being there even when you were wrecking my head - how can I curse you just because I miss you so much?
    I'm sorry for not being closer when I moved away. I'm sorry for not texting so much because we were busy. I'm sorry that I had to leave early the last time I saw you, and I'm sorry that the most time I'd spent with you in months was when you couldn't notice anymore.
    If you could see me now I don't know what you'd think of me. I don't know what you'd say about the current situation I've gotten myself into - I know you'd be planning his murder, to cut off his ickle legs, for stuff thats gone on. You told me your wish for me at the retreat was that I'd find my true love. At 11:11 today, I had two wishes. One for him, and one for you. That you'd know all of this, that you'd let me know you were there, because I need you.
    You'd laugh at me for being so clingy, I know you would. But I miss you every single day and I just want one last moment in a big hug, with us telling each other its going to be okay.

    I am never going to forget you.

    L.xx

    Dear C,

    I wish I could tell you all of this, but I have to keep it bottled in.
    I refuse to make you deal with my stuff when you have to deal with yours.
    As much as I try, its just not the same. And thats part of the reason I am so okay with this non-committal thing: it doesn't feel wrong that I don't have to let you in on me falling apart at the seams. You are just there for the fun moments; as much as I need and want you for all the time, thats not how this is, and so I don't have to expose you to the raw stuff. I curse myself for loving you this much - I want to protect you and not make you feel; even though I curse you for not feeling certain things.

    With all my love,

    C xxxx


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Hey you, ok, so here it is....

    You have been almost one of my closest friends for quite a while now, which is odd, seeing as we've only met a few times in person. You understand what I'm experiencing this year with the money worries, and all the rest of the general crap going on.
    It's easy to see why you have so many good friends that I can barely keep track,- you're one of the best yourself.
    The recent developments between us have left me confused, I'm not too afraid of damaging our friendship, I'd hope that will last, but I'm not sure if we're doing the right thing by trying to become a couple.

    I had a really brilliant time both times we spent a few days together, - No, it was amazing actually. I havent been as turned on in years. I loved the conversations.
    I'm not feeling the spark yet though, and I don't want to be another guy who turns out to be a disappointment later, another guy you'll regret wasting time on.

    We want many of the same things out of life, but there are some biggies we differ on.

    Let's go slowly and not make any big statements or promises we can't keep here, let's see if we still enjoy each others company and want to meet up as the weeks go by. I'm usually the world's worst for jumping in with both feet, and I fear you may be the same. We just can't do that here, or we'l end up hating each other. Give it time, and if it doesen't work for one or both of us, the friendship will be able to be saved.

    Looking forward cautiously........

    J


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    To my dearest friends..

    I know I've shut you out, and I know you're worried about me..but to be honest that's what makes it worse. Knowing that. Knowing that you think of me differently now, you look at me differently, and you talk amongst yourselves about me as if I'm an outsider and not one of you anymore. I know you mean well, but Jesus it hurts, it hurts alot. There are times when I feel I've lost everything, and to be honest alot of the time I feel like I've lost you too. It's not the same anymore. I don't know who I can trust and I don't know who wants to be trusted. Sometimes I feel so alone, and I get so angry at myself because I know alot of it is my own doing. I've always dealt with things on my own, I've always hated asking for help - I've neve wanted to need help. So to be here, to be this low and this far away from happy...it's a scary fcuking place. I'm not ready yet, I'm not ready to say it. But I need you. I really bloody need you.

    I can't face my own family, I can't face them because I am so bloody scared of what they would think of me if they knew. I just can't do it. I can't shake this guilt, I can't shake this feeling that somehow I've failed them, and I can't find a way back to the person I used to me before all the pieces that once held me together were torn apart. If only he knew what that one night did to me. If only he knew how hard it would be, how dark my days would become. If he knew, would he have stopped? Would he have realised how wrong he was? Was he that bad a person? Or was he simply someone who made a mistake and would take it back if he could do it all over again? I want to hate him, I need to hate him, but to be honest I hate myself more. He did this to me, and yet I hate myself for what he's done. Can you see how messed up that is?! How messed up I am?! How did I get here? How did I get to this place? I just want to go home; not to bricks and mortar, but to the place in my life where I was happy. I feel so lost now, as if I'll never find my place again. It hurts so much, and I'm trying to fcuking hard, but I'm tired. God I'm just so tired.

    How can I have a relationship again? How can someone ever love me when I can't love myself? It's always going to be there. I thought I could get past it, and I really tried, I tried to be happy, and to let someone in, but look what happened. Will anyone ever care enough to stick around? I feel like damaged goods now. I just want to be normal again. I really miss being me. I used to be an ok person. I used to believe in myself. I used to be strong.

    I know I say I don't need you there, I know I say I'm ok on my own. But I don't think I am. So please, please don't give up on me.

    x


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,960 ✭✭✭allandanyways


    S,

    I fancy you rotten, can you not see that yet?! So frustrating!


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users Posts: 197 ✭✭Sunshineboo


    Dear you,

    I miss you, some days its worse nearly every night I have a dream about you, wish I could forget you. I miss the little things like when you'd kiss my hand when you knew I hadn't fallen asleep or hold my hand, the way you would make me laugh so hard I'd almost be in tears and how you would shower me with little kisses.

    I know when I see you again, all my feelings will come back but I must be strong and realize it was never going to work because of your relationship issues and your health. You were the closest I felt to being in love, You'll always be special to me. I wonder if you still think about me, but I doubt you do.


    x


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 40,401 ✭✭✭✭x Purple Pawprints x


    Dear bf,

    I don't deserve you. I fall more in love with you everytime we see each other and I'm praying that we stay together.

    I love you so much.

    J xxxxx

    PS My wish at 11:11 on 11-11-11 was about us.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    (This is going to be a long one. I shouldn't even be posting it. I'm weak. Oh well.)

    My love,

    I can't and I won't let you make me wait indefinitely for you. You do realise that's what you're doing, right? I haven't talked to many people I know about our situation, but when I have they've been fairly unanimous in thinking that I'm (a) delusional and (b) being strung along by you. You have to understand that what you're doing right now is pretty much the textbook definition of stringing someone along.

    I'm sorry for being so erratic lately. I'm not trying to test you by changing my mind so often. I'm just really conflicted.

    I don't think you're a liar. But I do struggle with the contrast between your words and your actions. You tell me that you want it all with me, and then I see the continuing happy-couplishness between you and him and... it hurts. It physically hurts. It makes me sick to my stomach. One of us is undoubtedly being misled, and when I see stuff like that it's hard not to think that it's me. It's like you're ashamed of me - you can't keep me secret enough. The problem here isn't that I don't want to make the effort; there's very little I wouldn't do for you. But I can't see you doing the same for me. You keep saying that things are getting better, but I just don't see it. I'd give my all to you if you'd let me - but you won't. I'd trade everything you've said to me over the last few weeks for a smile in real life. Seriously.

    Are you depressed? You're dropping hints to that end, anyway. You know I've been there before. I don't know how much advice I can give on that front, but I really hope you're talking to someone. I've used medication; it worked for me. I hope you're trying as hard as you say you are. I miss the old you too. It goes without saying that if you ever wanted to talk to me about anything I'd drop everything for you. I'm not holding my breath for that, though. I want to be there for you. I want to help you get better. *hugs*

    You complained that my words were giving you hope, but that's exactly what I want them to do. You have lots to be hopeful for.

    Now this is the bit where I have to be a bastard. If you really mean what you said to me (repeatedly) then you have to break up with him soon. It's actually much worse if you're stringing him along. In theory I could always walk away from this but he's clearly trying very hard to keep you and if you've already decided that it's over then... by staying with him you're just using him IMO. I think you should break up with him before Christmas. That might not be a good time, but to be honest there's never a good time. And if you don't, I'm going to have to tell him about this. I don't want to do that - it's the nightmare scenario for me too - but I really think what you're doing here is totally unfair. This was never a casual fling. Neither of us were looking for that. I feel very strongly about this, and you're not going to change my mind. It's sh1t, but honesty is very important to me.

    Whether he finds out the story from my perspective or yours is up to you. I think we'd both prefer it to come from you. You don't have to tell him about me, but if it comes to it, I will.

    Please do the right thing, for everyone's sake. This is a crap analogy, but I suppose it makes sense in my head. It's like a stab wound. The knife is already in, but you haven't pulled it out yet. If you pull it out, you'll bleed, but you'll eventually heal. If you don't, you won't bleed, but you'll never heal. That seems to me to be where you are now. Maybe I'm completely wrong. I get the impression you haven't told me the full story.

    I'm doing this because I don't think I could follow any other path. I'm sinking. I don't think I could survive much more of this. How do you cope? I don't think I could manage if I were in your shoes. I can't just walk away now, so I guess the only way I could properly end this situation is by turning it into the biggest possible mess. Otherwise there'd always be that little part of me that would hope for more. At least this way we'd hate each other, and I could try to move on.

    I'd appreciate some sort of response to this. Please correct me if I'm totally misreading the situation.

    All my love,

    Me.
    x


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,213 ✭✭✭daenerysstormborn3


    Dear James

    I suppose the past couple of weeks have really made our relationship shine. For the entire duration of our relationship we had your dad. It was like having a third person in our relationship. It's so strange now that he's gone. It's just us two. Our relationship is like something completely different now. It has taken on a whole new dynamic.

    I saw such a different side to you than I have ever seen in anybody. You are such a caring person. I watched you hold your dad's hand going up and down the steps of the hospital a dozen or more times. Your dad being defiant and pretending he didn't need the hand and was just doing it to make you feel good. Do you have any idea how hard it was not to cry looking at that? I have never met anyone like you. My family is full of horrible people. There is not a person in my family who would do what you did for your dad. I don't know a lot of people who would do what you did for your dad.

    You've put up with so much criticism from people "close" to you about your choices in life which makes me laugh because these same people didn't turn around the kind of life you were living and go back and do your leaving cert in your 20s, go through fas, then go back to college as a mature student and take on the responsibility of looking after your dad for the past 7 years after your mum passed away and then set up your own business. In fact, these same people did very little in the line of being as selfless as you. They were too selfish to see beyond themselves.

    The past 2 weeks have been a real eye opener for me. I have seen what you went through when your mum passed away and now you're going through all of it again and worse this time. I hope I am being supportive enough for you, because you certainly need it now. I'm finding it very hard not to be extremely angry at a lot of people both on your behalf and in my own right too.

    I have seen the only side of you that exists. The caring, generous, loving side. You're so like your dad in that way. It's a pity more people didn't get to know the caring, loving side of your dad and instead zeroed in on the generous side.

    I'm a mix of love and affection for you and sadness over your dad. I think these past 2 weeks have certainly showed us how much we belong together and how strong we are. There's been times when I haven't felt strong on my own but I've felt strong with you holding my hand. We're strong enough to get through this together.

    People are moving on already. I feel like we were walking together, you, Beanie and I and everybody else was marching ahead of us anyway and the Beanie stopped walking and we keep looking back but nobody else bothers.

    It's just us now sweetheart. I really love you. We've got a really good thing going here. We have a special kind of love which evolved from something pretty unique. We're so lucky.

    M


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,107 ✭✭✭booboo88


    booboo88 wrote: »
    just fricking grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
    make a bloody decision for once in your life, this whole oh i dont mind what we do, where we go doesnt wash and is head fcuking wrecking.



    rant over
    Its just so annoying, what do you want to do, where do you want to go eat..... just make a decision.



    and the reason everyone thinks your a lesbian, is cause you act like one.
    your my best mate but sometimes woman your a head wreck.



    at least your nothing like your cousin though.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 15,676 ✭✭✭✭herisson


    Dear Irish Government,

    do you really hate me and all other students that much that you would severely affect our rights to an education!
    first you cut the grants (which seems to be an on going event)
    next you raise the registration fee (again an on going event)
    then you screw up the grant by changing the distance form college which has cut many students grants by 60%
    and now you get rid of all grants and state financially help for postgrads which many people need including myself! I wont be able to do the masters course i wanted now! no financial support! it would be handy if there were actual jobs going but there isnt!! :mad:

    this is insane! you are the ones who screwed up the country! you are the ones who decided to waste millions of euros to bailout banks! now you are screwing up the right to education for generations of students to come! :mad:

    its not only students! its all working people! heavily taxing those who can barely afford to live on the salary that have! you cut the childrens allowance AND the social welfare! i wish that ye could see that if you give yourselves a pay cut that you would see that you could save so much! :mad:

    so thanks government for screwing up my education! no really thanks it goes to show you really dont want me in this country do you?? :mad:

    thanks for nothing!
    Pixie-Fairy......an extremely broke and píssed off student!

    :mad:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Sweetheart ... please pick me. :o

    I'm not pretty, I'm not cool, I'm not perfect.

    But I love you, and I think you might love me too.

    Maybe someday?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,080 ✭✭✭foxinsox


    Dear Menopause,


    F**k off with yerself!

    This is how you make me feel :p:o:mad::mad::(:eek:confused::):D:(:mad::rolleyes::o

    :mad:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,194 ✭✭✭saa


    Dear ex-malebestfriend,

    2006 we started out as friends, we laughed a lot and held hands on occasion.

    We lost contact for a while 2009 we started hanging out again, you asked me to go camping with you alone, you stayed in my house, you touched my legs, you held me

    end of 2010 you told me you were going for a lads holiday, a while after you got back you must of forgot you said that as you really went on your own to meet a girl from online. You said she might be special and my heart sank. Last time I saw you, you kissed me on the head I wanted to tell you how I felt but I just text you later and said I really needed to tell you something, you said it was okay.
    This time you asked "aren't you going to give me that kiss?"
    So I kissed your cheek, there was a moment when I thought err what am I doing??
    But for some reason I kissed your lips and you then asked me what I was already thinking What are you doing? I said I better go now.

    I don't think I ever really wanted anything other than a peck on the lips
    but I just want to ask you, what? Why, curse you for making me laugh

    2011- now we've met up a few times, you never text me or ask me to do anything anymore. I would like to let you know I miss you buddy, and it hurts that you don't seem to miss the craic we had.


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users Posts: 243 ✭✭binxeo


    To my sister.

    It hurts me to even call you a sister. You stopped being a sister to me when I was 14. It took me a long time but I finally realise that you are out for yourself alone. You care about nobody but yourself. You have spread rumours to our family about me, you have started family feuds that are still going on today. You care about no one. You don't care who you hurt or what friendships you destroy along the way. You have master minded a sequence of events in my life through your badness that my children and I are still suffering from now. Yet you have never apologized.

    Your parents are in need right now and you complain and start more rows when you were asked to help financially, even though you are the most well off of all of us. You then take the only car they have that you loaned them because they couldn't pay you €100 a week for the loan of the car. You are willing to leave our parents with out heat and with out transport simply because they couldn't afford to buy you a wedding present. They are living hand to mouth and you say it is their own fault and you don't care. They are you parents. They still love you and you treat them worse then a dog in the street. You say your father is the most important person to you but you would let him lie in a cold damp bed at night with no heat and make him walk 8 miles with a bad leg to collect his pension. I hate you right now for the stress and worry you are putting our parents through. You have hurt everyone around you in the past but it is a shock to me that you even you would treat your own parents this way. They will be dead long enough and you will be sorry for your actions now.

    You are a shallow, mean, selfish person and to me you are not a sister, just a person I wish I never knew!!!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,107 ✭✭✭booboo88


    binxeo wrote: »
    To my sister.

    It hurts me to even call you a sister. You stopped being a sister to me when I was 14. It took me a long time but I finally realise that you are out for yourself alone. You care about nobody but yourself. You have spread rumours to our family about me, you have started family feuds that are still going on today. You care about no one. You don't care who you hurt or what friendships you destroy along the way. You have master minded a sequence of events in my life through your badness that my children and I are still suffering from now. Yet you have never apologized.

    Your parents are in need right now and you complain and start more rows when you were asked to help financially, even though you are the most well off of all of us. You then take the only car they have that you loaned them because they couldn't pay you €100 a week for the loan of the car. You are willing to leave our parents with out heat and with out transport simply because they couldn't afford to buy you a wedding present. They are living hand to mouth and you say it is their own fault and you don't care. They are you parents. They still love you and you treat them worse then a dog in the street. You say your father is the most important person to you but you would let him lie in a cold damp bed at night with no heat and make him walk 8 miles with a bad leg to collect his pension. I hate you right now for the stress and worry you are putting our parents through. You have hurt everyone around you in the past but it is a shock to me that you even you would treat your own parents this way. They will be dead long enough and you will be sorry for your actions now.

    You are a shallow, mean, selfish person and to me you are not a sister, just a person I wish I never knew!!!
    Oh my god, that is horrible, how could she do that to her own parents? :( parents who never let her go without, as in did the very best they could?


  • Registered Users Posts: 243 ✭✭binxeo


    booboo88 wrote: »
    Oh my god, that is horrible, how could she do that to her own parents? :( parents who never let her go without, as in did the very best they could?

    She is the only one the got to go to college out of 5 kids and my parents supported her. The luxury life she has now, and the job she has now is on part because of the help and support she got through college. But yet she expects the rest of us to help with our parents issues now. Worse then that she went out and bought her parents in law a top/ bottom electric blankets a few weeks ago cause they were heating was broke for a week. And the car she lent my parents for the last couple of weeks that she wanted paying for her sister in law had for a year and never paid a penny and was never asked for a penny. What I wrote above is the tip of the ice-berg Booboo, if I was to type it all I would be so angry!:mad:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,107 ✭✭✭booboo88


    binxeo wrote: »
    She is the only one the got to go to college out of 5 kids and my parents supported her. The luxury life she has now, and the job she has now is on part because of the help and support she got through college. But yet she expects the rest of us to help with our parents issues now. Worse then that she went out and bought her parents in law a top/ bottom electric blankets a few weeks ago cause they were heating was broke for a week. And the car she lent my parents for the last couple of weeks that she wanted paying for her sister in law had for a year and never paid a penny and was never asked for a penny. What I wrote above is the tip of the ice-berg Booboo, if I was to type it all I would be so angry!:mad:
    she's clearly not worth it, are her parents in law uppity people? she'll get her pay back, karma will come back to her


  • Registered Users Posts: 243 ✭✭binxeo


    booboo88 wrote: »
    she's clearly not worth it, are her parents in law uppity people? she'll get her pay back, karma will come back to her

    They made a bit of money in the boom but they are comfortable now, nothing write home about I don't think. Yeh I am a firm believer in Karma. She will get hers.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,107 ✭✭✭booboo88


    binxeo wrote: »
    They made a bit of money in the boom but they are comfortable now, nothing write home about I don't think. Yeh I am a firm believer in Karma. She will get hers.



    but in the meantime....*hug


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users Posts: 243 ✭✭binxeo


    booboo88 wrote: »
    but in the meantime....*hug


    Awww thank you, who says virtual hugs don't work!!!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,080 ✭✭✭McChubbin


    Dear Tutor,

    I hate you. I didn't sign up to endure months spent learning a skill I will never utilize in my life. I don't want to be a web designer so stop ramming HTML/CSS down my throat. I don't have any interest in it and all I want to do is work on the Film Production module. Why should I waste a year learning crap that's no use to me?
    Honestly!


    Dear Me,

    You just HAD to go and get that too short haircut, didn't you? Now you look like Dylan Moran dragged backwards through a hedge. Silly girl.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 965 ✭✭✭johnr1


    Goodbye Donie, you were a gent. The turnout today showed what people thought of you. You left nothing undone, and a wonderful family.

    I'll never forget those nights till 5 in Kilmac on the Jimmy with ice.:D

    I don't partake these days, but pour one for me up there, and keep some ice for it.

    So long King of Bartenders, neighbour, friend. I'll be seein ya.

    "Ah know baaay" :pac:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,884 ✭✭✭Eve_Dublin


    Dear Con,

    You left Ireland when I was 12. You were 8 years older than me but you were fantastic with me. You'd spend hours playing games with me showing me how to catch a football so I'd go on one day to play for The Dubs. You had the patience to spend hours in my bedroom inventing voices for each of my teddies and acting out ridiculous, silly stories with them for hours. We were so close. I loved you and you loved me. I was your "little skin and blister" (sister) or "skin" for short. You'd give me advice and share your wisdom and your ability to get down to my level and have chats for hours with me about everything and anything made me the luckiest girl on our street. I worshipped the ground you walked on....loved all the music you loved, loved Gaelic football and still do because of you, loved your books and your nerdy games and your positivity and laid-back attitude to everything (you're the exception of the 5 of us kids).

    But then you left for The States and I was devasted. You thought you'd be gone for just a year but you never came back and that was 18 years ago now and I feel like I've lost you as a brother. So much time has passed and we rarely keep in touch. The last time you knew me properly was when I was 12 and I'm kind of stuck in a time warp for you now. You don't know me well enough to relate to me as a woman in her 30s but you try your best. It must be strange for you. It's no one's fault...that's just how it is.

    You're married now to one of the loveliest women I've ever met and you've just had a kid and I see you on Facebook and the disappointment that I don't know you better is overwhelming. The man staring out at me is practically a stranger..I see you for a week maybe every two or three years because I live away too but because of your popularity, everyone wants to see you and I rarely get a chance to hang out. It's strange when we do...both of us trying to rekindle something and try to pretend no time has passed but we're both different people now and it's upsetting when I think about it for too long (so I try not to).

    I remember at your wedding 6 years ago you spoke to me and told me your biggest regret in life was that you left Ireland when you did and that you didn't get to know me better and never saw me grow up through my teens. We both cried. It was upsetting because there was nothing either of us could do to change the situation. It was a regret you'd always have but you didn't have a choice back then and I understood completely and still do.

    You left just after mam died and none of us knew how you felt. You were the only one who didn't cry at her funeral but I suspect you were the one hurting the most. You almost fainted when her coffin was lifted into the grave and you almost fell in and a neighbour had to catch....but you didn't cry. None of us have any idea how you felt. I asked you once and you told me you confided in your missus and it was such a weight off my shoulders. Only sometimes I get a glimpse of how you're feeling Con, like at your wedding when we had that heart-to-heart. I saw a glimpse of the softey with the "hard man" exterior and it was almost too much to bear.

    I suppose there's nothing we can do now. We live in different continents and neither of us have any intention of moving closer. I feel like I lost a brother all those years ago but strangely, I still love you in spite of the distance. You're incredible. You made a whole life for yourself over there and everyone loves you and you seem so happy. I'm delighted you've got a great woman out there looking after you. And I can tell you're an incredible dad just like you were an incredible brother back then. I can't help feeling sad when I think I'll never know you again like I did but we'll continue to live parallel lives on different continents and I'll see photos of you posted on Facebook and feel that distance. I get angry sometimes thinking life is too short to be away from your family like this and I'll know one day we'll both die regretting it.

    Just to let you know I do love you Con...that'll never change and regardless of whether or not I see you, the blood ties will always be there and I'll always have those memories of my childhood.

    I wish you all the very best of everything in life, Con.

    Your little skin 'n' blister.xx


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 965 ✭✭✭johnr1


    Eve_Dublin wrote: »
    Dear Con,

    You left Ireland when I was 12. You were 8 years older than me but you were fantastic with me. You'd spend hours playing games with me showing me how to catch a football so I'd go on one day to play for The Dubs. You had the patience to spend hours in my bedroom inventing voices for each of my teddies and acting out ridiculous, silly stories with them for hours. We were so close. I loved you and you loved me. I was your "little skin and blister" (sister) or "skin" for short. You'd give me advice and share your wisdom and your ability to get down to my level and have chats for hours with me about everything and anything made me the luckiest girl on our street. I worshipped the ground you walked on....loved all the music you loved, loved Gaelic football and still do because of you, loved your books and your nerdy games and your positivity and laid-back attitude to everything (you're the exception of the 5 of us kids).

    But then you left for The States and I was devasted. You thought you'd be gone for just a year but you never came back and that was 18 years ago now and I feel like I've lost you as a brother. So much time has passed and we rarely keep in touch. The last time you knew me properly was when I was 12 and I'm kind of stuck in a time warp for you now. You don't know me well enough to relate to me as a woman in her 30s but you try your best. It must be strange for you. It's no one's fault...that's just how it is.

    You're married now to one of the loveliest women I've ever met and you've just had a kid and I see you on Facebook and the disappointment that I don't know you better is overwhelming. The man staring out at me is practically a stranger..I see you for a week maybe every two or three years because I live away too but because of your popularity, everyone wants to see you and I rarely get a chance to hang out. It's strange when we do...both of us trying to rekindle something and try to pretend no time has passed but we're both different people now and it's upsetting when I think about it for too long (so I try not to).

    I remember at your wedding 6 years ago you spoke to me and told me your biggest regret in life was that you left Ireland when you did and that you didn't get to know me better and never saw me grow up through my teens. We both cried. It was upsetting because there was nothing either of us could do to change the situation. It was a regret you'd always have but you didn't have a choice back then and I understood completely and still do.

    You left just after mam died and none of us knew how you felt. You were the only one who didn't cry at her funeral but I suspect you were the one hurting the most. You almost fainted when her coffin was lifted into the grave and you almost fell in and a neighbour had to catch....but you didn't cry. None of us have any idea how you felt. I asked you once and you told me you confided in your missus and it was such a weight off my shoulders. Only sometimes I get a glimpse of how you're feeling Con, like at your wedding when we had that heart-to-heart. I saw a glimpse of the softey with the "hard man" exterior and it was almost too much to bear.

    I suppose there's nothing we can do now. We live in different continents and neither of us have any intention of moving closer. I feel like I lost a brother all those years ago but strangely, I still love you in spite of the distance. You're incredible. You made a whole life for yourself over there and everyone loves you and you seem so happy. I'm delighted you've got a great woman out there looking after you. And I can tell you're an incredible dad just like you were an incredible brother back then. I can't help feeling sad when I think I'll never know you again like I did but we'll continue to live parallel lives on different continents and I'll see photos of you posted on Facebook and feel that distance. I get angry sometimes thinking life is too short to be away from your family like this and I'll know one day we'll both die regretting it.

    Just to let you know I do love you Con...that'll never change and regardless of whether or not I see you, the blood ties will always be there and I'll always have those memories of my childhood.

    I wish you all the very best of everything in life, Con.

    Your little skin 'n' blister.xx

    If I could thank this post twice I would. I was just writing something somewhere else on the topic of losing good people from your life :( (through not being in contact for various reasons) and the notification email popped up on the phone.
    Life has many twists and turns which we don't see coming Eve, and somehow I dont think this is the end of your's and your brother's story. Actually I've seen my mother who wasn't even born when her sister emigrated 75 years ago and that sister to become as thick as thieves in later years. ;-). Neither used email or skype and we didn't have a phone till I was about ten, but it happened anyway.
    Life's too short.


  • Advertisement
Advertisement