Things you want to say to husband/boyf/ex's/friends/family/people *MOD NOTE POST #1*

LegacyUser

Dear "The One", "Soulmate", "Future Husband"

I would like to meet you soon

Love
Me

LegacyUser

Oh dear,
Where did you come out of? There I was, minding my own business and damn you, you started being nice to me. And you haven't stopped yet. I'm not used to this. I was quite happy in my own little "proud to be single" world.
I was independent, doing it alone and then out of the blue, you messed all that up and now I'm like a big pool of goo.
I spend hours daydreaming about you and about our future. I've been in relationships before but have never been so sure of anything as I am of you and me.
I think about weddings and babies with you. I'm one of those girls now. This ranting, bitter, cynical, hardened, independent woman now fantasises of white dresses and baby smells and holding your hand when we're old. Of first dances and nurseries and having your dinner on the table after a long day at work.

You have turned me into a 1950s housewife wannabe and I've never been so happy.

Damn you!!!!!

LegacyUser

You can't have any doubts now. Ball is in your court, don't play alone with it for too long we've both been doing that for ages.

Fiona

Dear C

I have been with you 24/7 since last Saturday.

I have to go back to Dublin tomorrow and I am dreading saying goodbye already, I know you feel the same cos you asked me can I stay just one more night

It has only been a month and 3 days an already we have said those sacred 3 words to each other, what has gotten into us, all the rules are being broken :eek::eek::eek:

Nothing has ever felt more right though :):):):):)

Even getting up early this morning to wash your race suit for you for the weekend seemed right!!!

I only wish I could be there but I have some serious drinking to do on Saturday with my brother, hope you make the pro's xxxxxxxxx


Fi xxxx

fro9etb8j5qsl2

E,

I always tried to boost your confidence and make you feel good. Still you tried to be me. So much so that you needed to have my boyfriends too.

I gave you the cold shoulder when I should've had the balls to point out your wrongdoings. You seemed so oblivious to the fact that you had tried to shift my bloke. And more fool me, it wasn't the first time either.

Still, I miss you. It's hard being a girl and not having a best girl friend

A

x Purple Pawprints x

Dear universe/grant people/BTEA people etc,

I'd really really appreciate if you would make it possible for me to go back to college for the year. I really want this. It would be great for my CV. Most of all though, I just want some sort of independence. I feel completely useless being a 23 year old still living at home relying on people for every little thing. I want to do my own thing. I need this.

Please help me out here.

Jane

sarahbro

Nan,
This day 3 years ago you came home to die.
In 14 days you will be dead 3 years.
You're dead.
You're not tucked up in bed beside grandad with your teeth in a glass on the locker.
You're gone.
It still hurts so much.
How can 3 whole years have gone by when my world stopped that Monday morning?
When the center of our family and universe died?
I miss you. God so much.
I love you Nanny. Always.
I wish you could come home
xxxxxxxx

brainyneuron

To me,
You had a crappy day and thats ok to say. You've had a great year and it'll only get better. You'll find a great new job soon

This too shall pass!

Luvage xxx

The Big Red Button

Everything I post (here and elsewhere) isn't about you.

Jesus ... do you really think my life is that small? We were never even friends - do you really think I care that much about some minor blip on the radar in the past?

The song "You're So Vain" comes to mind here ... :rolleyes:

LegacyUser

They call them 'triggers'; I wonder where the term came from...because it fits like no other. Just like the trigger of a gun taunts you with the fate of death, shattering these bones that hold you together whilst the rest of you falls apart; this trigger in your mind threatens to shatter any shred of sanity you have left.

All it takes is one thing. one moment, one reminder - and there you are, you're right back in that place you can't run fast enough away from. You're frozen; paralsyed within the confinements of your own body, your own mind - attacked by the very things which are meant to keep you alive; keep you sane. Then the shaking starts, the uncontrollable shaking which signifies the battle between your thoughts and the logic you struggle to accept. You tell yourself you're safe, that nothing has changed in your outside world apart from the goings on inside your mind. This place you're in, this physical place- it hasn't changed, it's still the same. It's you that has changed. It's you fighting this war inside your soul. It's you attacking yourself for things that you have no control over, for things that weren't your fault. You tell yourself over and over again..it wasn't my fault. You say it out loud, hoping that the sound will make it seem more real..but it doesn't. You're losing this fight, you're falling into the black...where not even a shadow remains by your side. You're alone. Completely isolated and alone; for no-one can understand, how could they? How could they possibly understand?! And do you even want them to? You fear not, for it they did..they would see you for who you really are. Weak, lost, alone...terrified.

You fight back. You fight your way back to the light and you hope that maybe for a day it will give you peace; that maybe it will let you escape from the overwhelming emotion which swallows you whole. Maybe for one day, it will shelter you. Maybe for one day, you can be yourself again.

Maybe for one day, you can be normal.

princess-lala

I actually just want to punch you!

Sadly for you the world doesn't revolve around you! I'm sick to my teeth of your crap, your lies and your make believe stories!

Its really sad cause behind all that you are actually a really nice girl who has somehow gotten caught up in a tangle of lies!

Please go back to the nice girl you once were!

Many thanks

Lala!

FewFew

Sometimes I think you make the best tea and I couldn't live without you. sometimes I get tea without you and I feel it tastes like something great I hadn't realised I was missing.

Sometimes I'm afraid that you're not all my mind has cracked you up to be. Sometimes that thought worries me.

Pomplamousse

Dear employment gods,

Not sure how many more PFO's I can deal with. You gots to help me out....please...?

foxinsox

Dear Dad,

I know you get scared sometimes, you are getting better. It will take time, soon you will feel much better. You just have to try to rest and breathe easy. We are all here for you. Keep fighting! I love you.

M x x x


Dear God,

Thank you for helping my Dad so far, don't forget about him though. He still needs your help. If you could please help him sleep easy and not be frightened. If you could help his breathing I would be really thankful. Thank you.

M

LegacyUser

Ok you/life/universe/angels,

You positively thought, opened up and He has come back into your life.

If he is meant as something more, let it be. If we are just to be friends, let it be. I am grateful.

This is your third chance. Do not mess it up. You deserve happiness. You almost self sabotaged it last time you f'ed up, you didnt think you deserved happiness or deserved him, in any shape or form, you had major regrets for what happened and beat yourself up over it.

No regets this time. No regrets. Only positivity.

WinterSong

B,

Though back then I knew that you were leaving, though I made the conscious decision to make the most of every last minute with you, I don’t feel like I did.

But that’s just life, isn’t it? No matter how much it hurts to think of a world without someone in it, until they’re gone you’ll never know just how much you'll miss them. Until you’ve experienced it, you can’t quite conceive of it. It’s why I rolled my eyes when we were talking about living each day as if it were your last. Because then you’d be living the same day over and over and over again, saying the things you mean the most to people you’re saying goodbye to, doing things you’ve always wanted to do and never making any progress in anything, never really building or establishing a life. Because although I don’t know exactly what I’d do if I found out any given day was my last, the chances are I wouldn’t go to college or work, if I had a job. And that’s not because I don’t love college (or won’t love my job, if I ever manage to get one…), it’s because in the grand scheme of having twenty four hours left to live, suddenly day to day things are no longer important. But they are important if you’re going to live for another year, or ten, or twenty. Because it’s those everyday things that you build a life out of, and without college and the friends I’ve made there and the things I’ve learned, I’d never be able to get to where I want to be. So some days are write-offs and others make me want to hide under my duvet forever, but they’re all part of an infinite whole, and they contribute in their own way to making my life a fully lived one. You have to assume you’re going to be around for a while longer because then you’ll make plans and even if they fall through disastrously, cataclysmically, you’ll have been forward facing to start with. You’ll have gained some momentum, you’ll have moved forward in some way, even if you don't feel it. And that’s important. Progress is important.

Every now and then, when I miss you most, I feel like I'm sliding backwards, in on myself, and I hate that. But I know now that I will continue to make progress even if there are those days. So I know that even though I feel I wasted my time with you, I didn’t really. I did all I could. I’d always have felt this way because the fact of your leaving is what I’m sad about, was always going to be what I was sad about, and I couldn't have stopped that, neither would I have if I'd been presented with the chance to. Because this is good for you, darling. It's what you want and when you said that you're happy and thriving that made me happier than I had been since you left. And I have all these memories, these glorious, polished memories where I can see you and hear your voice and I bring them out when I need them most, to get me through the harder times. I cannot wait until the day I can see you again, hear your voice, fall into one of your hugs, drink one of your perfect mugs of tea. I live for our conversations. I miss you so much, much more than I could ever say. I love you.

xx

beks101

Mum,

I know it still hurts, ten years later. I know that no matter how old she gets and no matter how glaringly obvious it is that she's sick beyond recovery, she's still your baby.

To me, to L, to the world, she is chronically, cripplingly ill and belongs in a home surrounded by professionals who are trained to deal with this sort of thing. I'm sure I still love her, as sisters do, but I learned to let go years ago because I had to. I had to survive, I had to carve out a life for myself. Holding onto a hope against the odds would have kept me in a personal hell of my own that I didn't deserve as a young woman trying to find my place in the world.

I know that this survival thing that is instinctive in me, rivals the maternal instinct that rules every single day of your life, even a decade on. Maybe I'll never understand that. Or maybe someday I'll have kids of my own and appreciate how unnatural it is to accept a grim, dark and devastating fate for your own child.

But Mum, you still have two other daughters. And we both need you as much today as we did ten years ago. We may have moved away, we may be achieving, progressing, prospering and enjoying life, but we need you and we will need you in the years ahead for all those life events that mothers and daughters should share. Travel, graduation, promotion, break ups, weddings, childbirth, birthdays, Mothers Days and Christmases for years to come.

I know you went through all that without your mother. I know she was the light of your life and forty years after her passing you still feel her loss every day. I know that you yourself feel like a lost child and would do anything in the world for her guidance on this.

But I'm so scared that L and I will suffer the same fate. I'm so scared for you Mum. You already have high blood pressure, arthritis, an inhumane amount of stress on your shoulders and a doctor that worries for you. You spend long days in the office, juggling files, complicated court cases and difficult clients, while trying to hold together a household that is falling apart under the pressure of a very sick woman who belongs in psychiatric care.

I know you can't let go. I know you are doing your best. I know you think that your unyielding love, compassion and kindness is the only medicine you have left to rely on.

But Mum, she's not getting better. And it's hurting us all, as a family, to have to suffer through her symptoms, her psychosis, her episodes, her dysfunction, the chaos in her mind that is etched on her face and imprinted all over that cherished house that we grew up in, every single day.

Just because we're not there day to day, doesn't mean we don't feel it. It's written all over your face every time we talk. You look older and more weary every single time. She sits in the corner and you scold her, tell her off, try to wield her into shape, coax her, plead with her, talk softly to her as you would a child, and my heart breaks as though I was fifteen and going through the whole horrible experience of her meltdown all over again.

I'm so scared of losing you Mum. I'm so scared of getting a phone call some day and being told that your heart gave up. I can't even type that sentence without crying uncontrollably. I need my Mum. I can't live in a world without you. You're the best mother a child could ask for, but you're out of your depth on this one. This isn't one you can fix. And I wish I could take the pain away, but I've spent half my life trying to make up for her, trying to be two daughters instead of one, and I understand now that it will always be in vain.

Please Mum, please open your eyes. I'm tired of trying to open them for you. You need to open your eyes and grieve now. You need to understand that no amount of kindness or love or prayers or decades of the rosary will change this.

I love you more than I can bear. L loves you more than life itself. Dad needs you to be strong and call the shots on this. She's not getting better Mum. Please let go. Please come back to us.

B xx

x Purple Pawprints x

Mam,

I feel like you hate me and I'm so miserable. I'm exhausted from fighting. I know I'm not blameless but I'm not doing anything wrong, I never have. I never even got into trouble once in all my years at school, yet I feel like I'm the worse daughter in the world. I want the old you back. I want to be able to talk to you. This hurts so much.

lilmissprincess

Dear C -

w.t.f was that?

Love, L

daenerysstormborn3

You call yourself a brother. You make me sick. What you've put us through over the past 9 months has pushed us to the brink, as if we haven't had enough to deal with. You haven't once asked us how we are coping with everything.

The biggest problem we have right now is you and your actions. You are a pathetic excuse for a man. We have had nothing for 9 months and we still have nothing because of what you have done. All because you are a selfish, greedy asshole. Your father would be eternally ashamed of you if he knew what you have put us through.

When your contract runs out in a few weeks time do not think for one second that you are welcome in our house with your hand out and your poor me face on. You and your family disgust me.

LegacyUser

Dear x

I can't stop thinking about you. Everything reminds me of you. I get butterflies when I see your name pop up on my phone. I'm a grown woman and I feel like a teenager.

I think I love you and better yet, I think you love me too!

Love from me x

LegacyUser

Dear You,

What happened to us? How did we end up here?
I really miss my boyfriend. The one who would do anything for me, the one who always wanted to spend time with me, the one who is always there for me.
When did you only start caring about yourself, doing things that only suit you.
You never send me random texts telling me you love me you know they always brighten up my day! You never want to talk about the important things anymore.
I told you i am depressed numerous times and each time you said you would get me help and then there was never any mention of it again.
You ask me why im always feeling down and only see the negative and then you tell me to get over it. Do you really think I want to feel like this?? I would give anything to feel "normal" again to not have a care in the world.
I think of all the things i've done for you, all the times i've been by your side when you needed me and I wonder if you would be there for me?
I don't think you would be.

Maybe it's me. Maybe I depend on you way too much. I've had a crap year from friends to college and to be honest I don't feel like I can depend on you anymore. You seem to be more interested in going out with the lads, you don't evening ask me if im going out anymore.
You won't make plans with me but yet when the lads ring you on a tuesday evening asking you if you want to go out at the weekend it's set in stone. I find that very frustrating.
I don't trust you anymore espically around your friends, but how could I ever tell you that.

I miss you, you are my best friend. I just want things to go back to normal again. Please

lola

Jenneke87

Dear Self,

All the issues you're currently facing, all the hurt and the worries will pass one day. This wont last forever,till then, stay strong and hang in there. You may think you have failed, but you didnt, that college course simply wasnt the right thing for you and that can happen. Stop thinking everyone and everything is against you,their not but you're making them. There are some people though you really need to cut ties with, stop worrying so much about their feelings and do what needs to be done for your own sake.

Spend more time doing things you really enjoy instead of lazing around. Its not doing your health any good and you're waisting your time and life because of it and you wonder why you feel a bit depressed? Stop worrying about your looks, you look fine,even if you have scars and uneven body parts,it could have been worse, you could have lost your foot.

You spend too much time indoors and you need a hobby. Join a club or go solo but at least go out and do something.

Thanks in advance,

J

yermandan

Dear C,

It has taken us 2 years of break-ups, arguing, loving and understanding life from very different perspectives but I am so happy now that we seem to have found a solid base upon which to build the rest of our lives together. I love you dearly and am very excited about our future.

x

LegacyUser

Dear X,

I know it's been a very long time since I last saw you and everyone changes, but you've taken that to a new extreme. You're so far from being the man I used to know that I can't even recognise any part of him in you anymore. I don't know why you've fallen to be this mockery, but I really wish that you could just come back. Just take your body back from this angry, bitter and cruel replacement. You were a hero to me before. So kind and just wonderful. But now, I couldn't stand the sight of you even if I had never know what came before and how woefully inadequate you currently contrast.

I know it may be melodramatic, but I feel as if you've died and I can't even have your memory, as with each passing day, it is corrupted by the bastard you've allowed yourself to become.

Please come back, please be the way you were!

angeldelight

Mammy,

I know you love my fiance, and you love me, so why can't you be excited about our wedding? When other people ask you go all misty-eyed and say you can't wait etc, when I try and involve you you have to make some sarky comment. Fair enough if you're not that into weddings, but you're meant to be into me and this is the biggest, most important and exciting thing that ever happened to me so a little bit of excitement would be very welcome. You're pushing me away with this attitude

Gunslinger92

Mom,

Why are you so negative? I don't understand why you have to put a negative spin on so much things, mundane as some of them are. When I pointed out this morning that I've seen a lot more rabbits in the garden than usual, you said "ah sure the farmers will shoot them all soon enough."

Yesterday when we realised that it was exactly a year til my older sister's wedding, you said "I just hope we're all alive for it". WTF?! You and dad are less than 60, and ye're the oldest because both yours and dad's parents are dead. Why would you bring up something so morbid?? Don't even get me started on your complete lack of enthusiasm for your first born's wedding.

There are more examples like that, and I know a lot are really petty but they still bother me. You're beginning to give me yet another reason for me to count down the days til college starts again, which I have been doing since the day it finished, and I find that really sad.
A lot of this is definitely because we work together. There is a reason we get along much better when I'm on the other side of the country.

Bubblefett

Dad, I love you.
Get well soon so you can come home and we'll have cherry scones like I promised.
You really scared me today, I hate seeing you like this. You're my super hero, you're not meant to get sick.
I miss you x

Vodkat

Dear D,

I wish you didnt have to leave, I wish we didnt have to break up, I wish I could go with you........ YOU WERE PERFECT! :(:(:(

LegacyUser

Dear .

God it's so hard not to contact you. Even after everything.

I wish it never happened, I wish you never said the things you said...I wish you never thought you things you said. But you did, you knew what it would do to me and you did it anyway. Despicable..that's the only word I can think of to describe it, but even that seems too highbrow a term for such a sadcase of a human being like you.

So yes, it's hard not to contact you - but I won't. All I need to do to remember how much I hate you is remember all of the ways in which you've purposely hurt me. It's hard, to walk away from abuse when it's all you know; when it's become such a pat of your life over the years that it seems 'normal'. But I'm learning a new way to live, I'm learning how to be happy and I'm trying to see that I deserve so much more than someone like you.

You broke my soul and my heart, you crushed my very being in all of the ways you knew how. And you didn't care. You never cared, I see that now.

There's no way for you to contact me now, because if you did I don't know what I'd do. I can't risk it. I can't risk another night like that. Another night of wishing my life away til morning, all because of a few words from someone who wanted me to see me break. And I did - I did break. But fcuk you, I'm putting myself back together. I am and I will.

You never seemed to realise how bad things were, or maybe you did and just didn't give a fcuk. Don't you see this is a condition?! How much it all messed me up inside?! How bloody unbearable it is and how it's okay to feel so so scared and wish it never happened...because it shouldn't have!!! It's a normal reaction to an abnormal situation. I'm not crazy, I'm not psycho, or any of the words you so kindly through at me. I'm going through a really difficult time, with no support from a ****ed up, selfish excuse for a human being.

I wish it had been different. I'm a good person, I didn't deserve any of this, and all I wanted was for you to care..all I wanted was for you to want me.

How dare you? HOW DARE YOU keep coming into my life and fcuking it all up? Stay away this time, there's no open door for you here.