Things you want to say to husband/boyf/ex's/friends/family/people *MOD NOTE POST #1*

WinterSong

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0YuaZcylk_o

boomtown123

Someone hire me pleeeease. I'm not liking all this free time to think. I need to be motivated again.

C


PS, I really reallly really don't want to move back home.

Asbury Park

Dear Me,
In general, no one should turn to Don Draper for advice but take this line of his to heart "Get out of here and move forward. This never happened. It will shock you how much it never happened."

Sunshineboo

Dear you,
I should have known you wouldn't contact me again, I knew deep down you wouldn't you have your "issues" but still it would be nice surprised just once.

Me.

There is a horrible pattern forming here getting involved with emotionally unavailable men knowing deep down they will never want/have a relationship with me. The feeling you are going to end up alone? Stop it, it will be better for you to be in alone than to be in limbo with a man who will never give you what you need.

me

beks101

So many ladies who have gotten involved with emotionally unavailable / non-committal / not-bothered men in these last few pages.

To you all - to me - I want to say:

Don't be afraid of your needs.
Don't be afraid to walk when they are not being met.
Don't be afraid to be on your own.
Don't be afraid to be scared of being on your own, or of crying for desperate want of somebody who's just all wrong for you.
Don't blame yourself for wanting the wrong person so badly.

We're all human, and what we do - works for us.
On some level - there's a method to your madness.
Spend some time with yourself, writing, reading, sitting, staring, crying, freaking out, whatever. Spend some time and try to hear exactly what it is you really need.

And keep your heart open. Because no matter how astray it leads you - there's just no other way to live.

Beks

Ah_Yeah

You missed out big time. Sorry for your loss, I'm awesome.

x Purple Pawprints x

You'll get there. xx

giggii

A fifteen minute phonecall is not a good way to end a relationship. Grow a pair and have a proper conversation with me. I get your reasoning and I respect that you have a load of s**t to sort out and need time but you're making me feel like all we had wasn't worth anything.
While I still love you so much and want you to be in my life (and you said you did too...), the way you're acting is making it very easy to shut the door on that too.
You can't text me and tell me what a crappy time you're having, I'm not your girlfriend any more, it was your decision, you can't expect me to treat you like I still am. You can't pick and choose what you want from me, you can't expect to have the emotional perks of a relationship of you don't want to be in one. I can't deal with that.
Cop the f**k on, you're a grown man, you rushed into the decisions you've made and now you've to deal with them. Your plan didn't work out, make a new one and let me know when you do. You have so much potential to do something great, it would be a shame to waste it.


I'm so disappointed that it had to end like this. We had an amazing thing going and it still hasn't hit me that it's over. We'll always have Liverpool. xxx

Puddleduck

I dont hate you, I dont love you either. Id say lets just be friends but I dont think we would be great friends either. Ive suprised myself at how not upset I am. I think I stopped loving you years ago but forced myself to keep going. I hope you find whatever it is youre looking for. Take time out this time before rushing into anything.

Whispered

Get over yourself. It's one thing to have self confidence, it's another to go on about how great you are ever chance you get. :rolleyes:

shalalala

Sums it up better then I ever could.

TommieBoy

Things I cannot say to people, but wish they understood:

R - you are more important to me than us

K - i was in constant damage control with you

C - you are a dictator

Universe - stop throwing enraged people in my path - i aint changin' my pacifist ways for nobody! can the pendulum start swinging the other way now?

Self - you used to be strong.....where is she hiding?

Life - where are you leading? for i am lost without a compass.

Asbury Park

Why was I punished for what someone else did to hurt you?

x Purple Pawprints x

I know it was for the best and we weren't working but I miss you. It's going to take me so long to get over you.

LegacyUser

Such a weird few days!!!

(1) Person number 1, thanks for such a great few days. It was honestly the best few days I've had in ages, really felt like old times. I love how sitting around, chatting and laughing is just as much fun and easy going as it ever was. it was great.

(2) Person number 2. I think Im glad I took that little risk. I really miss you. I know I shouldnt because they are right at the end of the day and about you. Your signs are confusing, this weekend was too. I've got to stop hoping, nothing will change. got to stop focusing on little moments and take in the bigger picture. will I ever see sense!!

Mc Kenzie

Sometimes it seems easy for you.

Its hard to share my life with you when your so far away.
Its already hard dont tell me the things i dont want to here,

its like i have to move on and still hold on. I v heard people explain how hard it is to do, one of these , but doing both ...

St.Spodo

I keep checking my phone out of habit, but there is no text forthcoming. I don't think I'll ever fully get over you, but I owe it to myself to try and be happy. Today was a better day than I had anticipated.

TommieBoy

AHer - I've always tried my best to be a good person, granted I fail miserably at times... Cruelty is something I don't get, in any way, shape or form. Especially of this magnitude. I've been accused of a great many falsehoods in my life, mostly out of my own silence. I find one cannot change anothers opinions anyway... My dad used to be concerned for my 'spritely ways' - an innocent, open, trusting outlook on everyone and everything. He was right, I don't understand the ways of the world nor many of the people in it. Brava to you, for knocking some spriteliness outta me. I hope whatever ye got out of that thread was worth it. May I suggest ye have the courage to clarify facts privately before cowardly making false public accusations? Just a thought for the next time ye are tempted to defame anyone elses character, for no justifiable reason.

IrishEyes19

Please please please god let me get this!!!! Really need this!!!! Iv tried so hard and im sooooo tired!

The_Morrigan

I should be happy for you, you're my brother and it's fabulous news....but I hate you for making me feel old and like a failure. We both know what Mom is thinking and saying behind our backs.

Ah_Yeah

You will have no luck if you go through with this. Karma always comes back around. I may have been harsh and technically I have no say in what you decide to do, but I will always stand up for what I believe in, and for those who cannot stand up for themselves, and you do not scare me.

ItAintMeBabe

I really like you...and I'm nearly sure you really like me. You make me all smiley and happy again

Blush_01

I promised you that I would always be your friend. And I will try. But you are pushing me away at such a furious rate that I can't see how to fight back.

What the hell is going on? And please, for the love of god, can you explain your behaviour at the weekend? Because right now I am about to give up temporarily until you come to your senses a small bit. I won't agree with you on everything. I don't expect you to agree with me either. But if you ever physically shove me again, even in jest, I will lose the rag like a spinning top. You, of all people, understand my anxieties, understand my limitations, or used to. And whatever funny sh!t you cooked up with himself, I want none of it. I don't stand beside you on this, but I am still your friend. We don't have to choose the same people for the same things to be friends. And he might be your best friend, but I don't have to change my opinion on who I think the best person for the job is, and I'm unlikely to jump into his boat if I do, because he's barely civil to me, and blanks the whole world out when you're there. His hero worship might make you feel good, but I don't think it justifies your behaviour. I was embarrassed. You pushed me out the door while I was speaking with people I know only as acquaintances. Actually, no, I was mortified. Yeah, you're very funny. So funny I'm sitting here days later fuming over the whole thing.

I'm starting to feel like I don't know you anymore. And I promised in good faith never to leave you. But you never promised not to make me leave.

(As for the other thing, well, if he'd contact me, I'm sure I'd have an idea where I stood, but I've gone from being prime entertainment to **** on the sole of someone's shoe overnight. Hardly good for my self esteem either.)

tomthetank

Tomthetank,

I'm tired of the same old inner dialogue.

I'm not good enough.

According to who? Who writes these rules? Who's playing god here?

Would you please step back and take a bloody long hard look at yourself and what you've achieved with your life so far, before you decide for the fifth time today and the fiftieth time this week that you're a piece of worthless shit?

You've battled your demons for years now, because you were dealt a rough card as a kid and this is how you've learned to deal. You're dealing, and you're trying to change. Every fucking day, you try to change. You're doing the best you can do with the tools that you have.

You've achieved more than most academically, held down a highly competitive desirable job in a foreign country, despite not knowing anyone or anything about the place and having to learn to swim in a brand new territory on the other side of the world. And you haven't swam - you've flown. You are a success story. You've made everyone proud. You've made yourself proud, if you'd stop beating yourself up long enough to recognise it.

And you've met a few bad eggs along the way. This latest one has hurt you indescribably. And guess what you do? You decide to interpret that as proof that you're not good enough to be with. When the fact is that the only proof here is that you're a human being with a good heart, who chooses to see the good in people and got burned accordingly.

That is not your fault. You cannot control other people's behaviour. You can only control your own. And maybe from this, you've learned that taking a chance on people won't always work in your favour.

But if you took the time to see how good, honest and true a person you are, you'd be OK with that. You'd be OK with the disappointments and the pain, because you'd know that you deserve better. You'd know that you have all you need to live a happy life right inside of you, and the good, genuine people you meet along the way are just a bonus.

Please stop being so mean to yourself TT. None of the things that you're choosing to hate yourself for, are your fault. They're just life unfolding right before your eyes.

You're good from the inside out. Actually fuck that, you're better than good - you're bloody great.

Remember what L said this morning: If only you could see what other people see.

Please open your eyes now x

LegacyUser

D,

Thank you for making me smile again. I love the fact that we can just have fun with no drama and no B.S.
Im glad we've met and sorry that I will only be here for a few more weeks! - but I know youre gonna make those few weeks the best ever!

S

LegacyUser

I like you! You know this! And you have rejected me every time I've mentioned commitment. So leave me alone! Stop contacting me randomly, stop calling me and pretending you're so glad I answered and glad to talk to me only to hurt me in the next breath! Just get out of my head and my life!!! I am happy for you, but christ sake, you are so cruel! And so wrapped up in your own self importance. Damn you for the crap you've put me through for years!!! I am done! No more caring about you, or wondering, or hoping!! Fresh start now and you dont exist anymore. I was and am good enough by the way! Look at me for christ sake! Look at what I've achieved and done, and yet you managed me make me feel sooooooooooo small.

It's a real talent of people like you, you get right into someones heart and head until you've got a tight grip and then you chip and chip away at everything thats good about them. Every arguement, every let down and hurtful comment and moment, you manage to turn it around with the sympathy and pity parade you pull out to get away with things, and blame others for your mistakes.
The worst part was making me out to be in the wrong, over the top, when I reacted to every let down, or every nasty thing you did. Made me look stupid and crazy.

Let me go now. Just want to be free of your BS!!! Wish I never met you!!!

Ella

Dear Dad

I miss your stories. Even the makey up ones. Especially the makey up ones. Mam tells me stories now and i dont know if she's telling the truth or taking up where you left off and having a giggle with you

I only knew you for 15 years but they were the best 15yrs of my life. You were an awesome man and the best Dad a girl could have.

Love you up to the sky and down to the ground

S

x x x x

LegacyUser

I wrote this back in June:

from-me wrote: »

D,

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i3YLpl2cxuc

Hurry up and catch up with me already! :P

D, you're going to be a fantastic father.
I'm so happy you finally caught up.

Mrs Garth Brooks

Dear Mam

Stop interfering in our lives. We're all grown adults now, in our 30s.

Do you think we're all failures because we didn't get hitched and pop out babies 10 years ago?

Times have changed alot from when you were young. Back then, it was acceptable to get knocked up and married at 20. We have sense now. And not very bothered. If it happens, fine. But its not life.

I dont like the way how you drop hints to us.

My brother in Australia has a girlfriend of a few months. He's been keeping it quite and I think he knows you'll just be too interfering.

You found out, when someone let slip. What did you say? Good on him, its about time at 32 years of age. Then you mentioned marriage and kids. And just because its the second time someone let it slip, its very serious between them. And she's the one.

You dont know anything about her and what she or they want out of life. You dont have to be like that after a few months.

But I cant get over how you said good on him, quite a few times. Good on him. Is a woman a prize?

You have always made it clear what a woman's role was in life. He's only a year out of home. Is it now her turn to take over minding him? Your talk of them getting married and kids awhile ago just shows you expect her to do the exact same as you.

Just relax. You dont have to be like that. And only after a few months together. Christ, the pressure on her. I pity her.

What's worse, you expect the same of me. I still have a few years in me yet, im in no rush.

confuseddotcom

Dear Postman,

Please please have some long-awaited long-overdue much-needed certain Post for me in the morning.


Yours in sending-all-the-good-vibes-your-way anticipation,
Me.