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Woman Utters Line Never Previously Recorded In A Police Report

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    #2
    BluesBerry
    Registered Users Posts: 2,221 ✭✭✭BluesBerry


    she looks scary I wouldn't blame the men decling her advances :eek:


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    #3
    Teutorix
    Registered Users Posts: 1,674 ✭✭✭Teutorix


    Sexy


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    #4
    TheZohanS
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,582 ✭✭✭✭TheZohanS


    Sounds as if she's some sort of hard luck woman.


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    #5
    Poly
    Registered Users Posts: 1,807 ✭✭✭Poly


    She obviously never heard of copper face jacks.


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    #6
    cherryghost
    Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 17,133 Mod ✭✭✭✭cherryghost


    Don't open link!!!!!

    DOES NOT WANT

    AAAAAAAHHHH!!!!


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    #7
    Nodin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 46,938 ✭✭✭✭Nodin


    Poly wrote: »
    She obviously never heard of copper face jacks.

    ...or febreze, so it seems.


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    #8
    karlog
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,563 ✭✭✭karlog


    Poly wrote: »
    She obviously never heard of copper face jacks.

    or vagisil


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    #9
    Nodin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 46,938 ✭✭✭✭Nodin


    cherryghost wrote: »
    Don't open link!!!!!

    DOES NOT WANT

    AAAAAAAHHHH!!!!

    Your soul is mine now.....whats left of it.


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    #10
    Ronin247
    Registered Users Posts: 1,256 ✭✭✭Ronin247


    Not just an ugly fat f*cker but she had a bad case of "stinky twinky" so he declined. Made for Gerry Springer.


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    #11
    Hazys
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,510 ✭✭✭Hazys


    I'd take death over the alternative tbh


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    #12
    Hazys
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,510 ✭✭✭Hazys


    However, as Watson approached Williams, “he became overwhelmed by horrible vaginal odor emitting from Melissa Williams.” Watson, understandably, “declined to proceed any further.”

    *shudder*


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    #13
    opinion guy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,001 ✭✭✭✭opinion guy


    However, as Watson approached Williams, “he became overwhelmed by horrible vaginal odor emitting from Melissa Williams.” Watson, understandably, “declined to proceed any further.”

    ....now that's what I call a sticky situation....:P


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    #14
    ejmaztec
    Registered Users Posts: 24,046 ✭✭✭✭ejmaztec


    Her and the Aussie rugby player should have a get-together, to remind him of old times.:o


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    #15
    johngalway
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,271 ✭✭✭✭johngalway


    ejmaztec wrote: »
    Her and the Aussie rugby player should have a get-together, to remind him of old times.:o

    Cork DJ as voyeur. What is it with this week and these stories!


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    #16
    Fizman
    Registered Users Posts: 6,605 ✭✭✭Fizman


    While Danny Williams “declined said invitation,” the other man, Adam Watson, told cops that he “agreed to perform at her request.” However, as Watson approached Williams, “he became overwhelmed by horrible vaginal odor emitting from Melissa Williams.” Watson, understandably, “declined to proceed any further.”

    “Somebody is going to eat my pussy or I’m going to cut your ****ing throat.”

    All of a sudden my Friday evening curry isn't so appealing.


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    #17
    iamstop
    Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 12,184 Mod ✭✭✭✭iamstop


    Picute:
    http://s8.thisnext.com/media/230x230/Goodbye-Kitty-Tee_4FFCED49.jpg

    https://open.spotify.com/album/69JKwCcZGdLqX4Upj3DwP7



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    #18
    charlemont
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,725 ✭✭✭charlemont


    best story i read all day


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    #19
    Gordon
    Registered Users Posts: 35,524 ✭✭✭✭Gordon


    Nice, that reminds me to think of a sentence to use next time I get picked up by the police so that I can claim to be the first one ever to have had it recorded in the police report.

    "Ossifer, I'm not urinating here, I'm using my bio-ray gun to kill the invisible killer terror ants from the future that have set out to kill the future rebel alliance leader, leave me be!"

    Got to give them something to chuckle over at work.


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    #20
    Guill
    Registered Users Posts: 3,331 ✭✭✭Guill


    mmmmmmmmm

    I'd give her one...:cool:


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    #21
    AAAAAAAHHH
    Closed Accounts Posts: 377 ✭✭AAAAAAAHHH


    I used a line possibly never used in a police report recently while giving a statement. "It reminded me of the scene from the film 300 where the king kicks your man down the well"


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    #22
    the purple tin
    Registered Users Posts: 10,943 ✭✭✭✭the purple tin


    Sounds a bit like a more graphic/disturbing version of my name is Earl!


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    #23
    ascanbe
    Registered Users Posts: 3,089 ✭✭✭ascanbe


    I'd imagine the two gentlemen she was dealing with were paragons of hygiene.


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    #24
    Sticky_Fingers
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,379 ✭✭✭Sticky_Fingers


    Guill wrote: »
    mmmmmmmmm

    I'd give her one...:cool:
    You have to be codding us, there's something awful fishy about your post


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    #25
    iamstop
    Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 12,184 Mod ✭✭✭✭iamstop


    cleanliness - godawfulness or something. :confused:

    https://open.spotify.com/album/69JKwCcZGdLqX4Upj3DwP7



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    #26
    AckwelFoley
    Registered Users Posts: 12,556 ✭✭✭✭AckwelFoley


    However, as Watson approached Williams, “he became overwhelmed by horrible vaginal odor emitting from Melissa Williams.” Watson, understandably, “declined to proceed any further.”

    Now we know whos making the stockpile of free cheese


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    #27
    darragh16
    Registered Users Posts: 882 ✭✭✭darragh16


    Ehhhh... You're grand love


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    #28
    iamstop
    Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 12,184 Mod ✭✭✭✭iamstop


    Did someone say growler? :eek:

    https://open.spotify.com/album/69JKwCcZGdLqX4Upj3DwP7



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    #29
    brightkane
    Registered Users Posts: 2,716 ✭✭✭brightkane


    She was in coppers saturday night
    That low light and all the slap she had on plus plenty of jager bombs, well lets just say she didnt have to use the knife, my mate dunner done her too.....


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    #30
    PanchoVilla
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,053 ✭✭✭PanchoVilla


    Only in West Virginia. :rolleyes:

    http://www.motifake.com/image/demotivational-poster/1006/west-virginia-funny-demotivational-poster-1277867610.jpg


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    #31
    Mrmoe
    Registered Users Posts: 2,213 ✭✭✭Mrmoe


    Guill wrote: »
    mmmmmmmmm

    I'd give her one...:cool:

    By one I guess you mean a hosing down with disinfectant solution:eek:


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