What's the most retarded thing you've done in your entire life?

fasttalkerchat

Lisha wrote: »

the most stupid thing I ever did in my life was to drive around a round-about the wrong way.(against the traffic) In my defence I was pregnant and crying. Definatly the most scared I ever was in my life.
Thank God no-one was hurt

In your defence? That makes it worse!
Could you not have stopped and finished your whinge at the side of the road??

EDIT: In fairness I did the same thing... my excuse? Speeding on a wet and icy road. Was about to go sideways into the roundabout so floored it and steered for the last exit. Had just got the car under control when I saw a police checkpoint up ahead. They couldn't have seen it thankfully!

Niamhoooooo

i wouldnt say this is "retarded" exactly, but a few nights ago i was sitting beside my brother on the sofa. I picked up his phone and started to rename all of his contacts. Surprisingly he didnt notice what I was doing, even though the phone beeped after I renamed a contact.
All in all, it took about an hour and a half to rename all the contacts.
The next day, I was a little more worried at what I had done. I was scared i'd get into a fight with my brother who is 7 years older than me, weighs much more than me and therefore is far stronger than me. Luckily we were away in the morning (whilst he was in bed). Then when I arrived at the house, I stayed outside terrified to go in, because surely he would have discovered the renamed contacts by now? But no he did not. But my father soon told him. I heard my brother shout "you ****ing ****, Niamh". That was my cue to run up my lane and sit for ages until I thought the coast was clear. When I arrived at my house, I didnt say anything but ran into my room and barricaded the door. Hours later, I ventured out. My brother saw me and pretened to be chasing after me. Now, Im just waiting for his revenge witch, in his case shall be sweet

cruais

Niamhoooooo wrote: »

i wouldnt say this is "retarded" exactly, but a few nights ago i was sitting beside my brother on the sofa. I picked up his phone and started to rename all of his contacts. Surprisingly he didnt notice what I was doing, even though the phone beeped after I renamed a contact.
All in all, it took about an hour and a half to rename all the contacts.
The next day, I was a little more worried at what I had done. I was scared i'd get into a fight with my brother who is 7 years older than me, weighs much more than me and therefore is far stronger than me. Luckily we were away in the morning (whilst he was in bed). Then when I arrived at the house, I stayed outside terrified to go in, because surely he would have discovered the renamed contacts by now? But no he did not. But my father soon told him. I heard my brother shout "you ****ing ****, Niamh". That was my cue to run up my lane and sit for ages until I thought the coast was clear. When I arrived at my house, I didnt say anything but ran into my room and barricaded the door. Hours later, I ventured out. My brother saw me and pretened to be chasing after me. Now, Im just waiting for his revenge witch, in his case shall be sweet

If he gets you back, just put eye drops in his tea. He will never prove it was you!

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy

cruais wrote: »

If he gets you back just put eye drops in his tea. He will never prove it was you!

He won't be able to phone for a doctor either.

cruais

jar_of_coins wrote: »

He won't be able to phone for a doctor either.

Ah it was a joke... It will give him the runs for a few hours. Not going to kill him, and again, it was a joke

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy

I got that. Maybe I shouldve used a smiley

cruais

jar_of_coins wrote: »

I got that. Maybe I shouldve used a smiley

Maybe I shoulda copped that too! My bad! I'm delirious at he moment trying to study for exams... Clearly it's going great!

the_syco

Downloaded Minecraft. It's more addictive than smoking :pac:

veryangryman

fasttalkerchat wrote: »

In your defence? That makes it worse!
Could you not have stopped and finished your whinge at the side of the road??

EDIT: In fairness I did the same thing... my excuse? Speeding on a wet and icy road. Was about to go sideways into the roundabout so floored it and steered for the last exit. Had just got the car under control when I saw a police checkpoint up ahead. They couldn't have seen it thankfully!

Just in the interest of fairness (and no im not stirring things up)...

Can any men here admit to having ever done this? Just my own mum, 2 women i know and 2 posters here (all female) seem to have done this. Ive never heard of a man doing it.

Lisha

veryangryman wrote: »

Just in the interest of fairness (and no im not stirring things up)...

Can any men here admit to having ever done this? Just my own mum, 2 women i know and 2 posters here (all female) seem to have done this. Ive never heard of a man doing it.

O Iknow this does not excuse what happened but:,
I was on a new slip road from a carpark that had no signage, it was not obvious to me that I was on a roundabout. (you'd have to know the roundabout I suppose, to see what I mean) I turned left at what I thought was a Tjunction, not knowing it was a roundabout
there was no traffic on the road at all it was late at night. I was completely exhausted and not in a great place emotionally
When I realised what I had done I nearly died.
I rang guards following day to say about signage being needed. They said I was not the first to make the mistake and that council had been notified re signage, which was errected subsequently.

Mistakes are not intentional they are mistakes.
Did I have nightmares after about what disaster could have happened? Yes I most certainly did.
Did I modify my actions after to ensure I did not drive when I was physically/mentally unable? Yes I really did.

BlueSmoker

I enjoyed this thread so much, it had me in stitches, out of some much enjoyment, I felt I should share some of my genius.

Well there is alot here posted that echo my own experiences, one that stands out though. Is that I was so nervous of my first sexual experience, that I tried to distract the girl, with the exciting news that the "Wonder Years" was just starting. I wouldn't mind it, but was a re run. Needless to say we didn't continue going out for much longer.

I have also managed to crack my ribs 5 or 6 times. 2 of them where brilliantly thick.
1. While heading to the bar, I trying to look cool I took the stairs two at a time, and while bathing in my assumess, I tripped and collide with the banister. I limped up the stairs after that. Pride and Rib very sore.

2. While again trying to look cool, and racing against someone, I cut infornt of them way to soon. Their leg interwined in mine and I went up in the air, realise I was going to fall on my new Discman, I manovered my shoulder to protect my fall, it worked it protected the discman. But I also managed to punch myself in the ribs cracking two of them (with doctor and hospital visits and pain killers it would have being cheaper to buy a new one)

I'm sure I have loads more, and I post them later on. Sure if you can't laugh at yourself......

danniemcq

BlueSmoker wrote: »

. But I also managed to punch myself in the ribs cracking two of them (with doctor and hospital visits and pain killers it would have being cheaper to buy a new one)

hospital for cracked ribs!? puny human

lets see though so far i've cracked bones in my foot from jumping off a pier when the tide was a bit to far out so hit foot off the concrete foundation.

Got into the wrong car, (wrong make, year and worst of all wrong colour)

drilled a hole for a mirror in a bedroom at home and never checked for pipes and went straight into the hot water pipe (remember kinds never drill directly above a tap)

first job in a bar didn't know the difference in Smirnoff and Bacardi

Drove a quad off a pier, 20 foot drop into 5 foot of water, and then it started snowing

thought that lenor fabric softener was the same as normal washing machine stuff (i still say it doesn't matter but the GF just laughs)

BlueSmoker

Unfornately I need the sick note from the xray, to get the time off work

I also managed to try and open the plastic around a bottle of lucocade, with a stanley knive, which slide into on the glass into my thumb. Not clever as it didn't open the bottle and I don't even like lucocade

When I was 7, me and my sister decide to play fetch with the dog in the living room. This ended with us shattering 80% of my mother's Waterford Cystal collection (Some of it quite expensive) I don't think we ever got pocket money again after that.

While bring tables in to work (the tables where wooden and about 9ft/10ft long), I thought it would be a good idea to bring the up the escualtor rather than the services lifts. I brought the first one up, by standing it on, it's end. Just as I turned to the other staff, to say it was fine, the table shatter into little splinters in my hand and rain down on the staff below me. In my wisdom I managed to get the table stuck between the roof and the esculator.

As the shopping center was closed, we tidyed it up and said nothing, until about 2 months later security asked us if we knew what happened, we all claimed innocents and denied any knowledge. Until security, a video tape of me on the esculator, reaching the top with a very small piece of would in my hand and a look of total shook on my face. It cost the shop IR£1,500 to fix, Boss was a great guy and wasn't that mad with me.

danniemcq

BlueSmoker wrote: »

Unfornately I need the sick note from the xray, to get the time off work

lucky you!

i cracked 3 ribs over the last year and when you have a cracked rib and really bad hayfever so every sneeze is like being stabbed its a nightmare.

Sadly even with a sick note i'd miss up to 3 days of pay before i got sick days paid so couldn't afford 3 days so had to suffer through it.

horrible, and the b@stards in the chemist made me feel like a complete scumbag asking for solpodine (or whatever the one is with Codine in it)

Fr.Buzz

Well there is a house across the road from my house it was built a few years back but never finished off inside. The owner would every now and then do a bit of work inside whenever he had the money..So one saturday evening just hanging around outside I decided to go across to the un-finished house and have a nose about the place, just out of boredom.. So there I was standing in the mucky lawns..looking in the windows..Then i came to the sitting room window and started peering into it with my snout planted onto the glass..after about 2 minutes starring in I noticed the 2 owners sitting down inside watching tv looking back out at me giving me the dirtiest of looks..

Turns out they had finished the house inside but not the exterior, and they had moved in about 2 weeks ago..Love the way nobody decided to inform me while I was away..

BlueSmoker

Ireland is great, we keep giving out about the ole country, yet no one wants to protect it, and no I'm not looking for arms, I would prefer it people where honest, to me i
that is the most retarded thing an human can do, being dishonest to themselves, I have never once seen a client of mine (with mental disabilities) never as retarded as you guys

Definition of retarded id, is slow moving to reality, hence why some paint are consindered redardject,

Alot of us don't actually really realise the words we we are useing, "retard, ******, fagot, ladyboy, forgein national " do you realease how up setting it is to people, who are try to crate a better country. Let's just use the explain of Ladyboy.

I can defined that to the hilt, but as this thread suggest, we are gob****es, and why shouldn't we be?????

I know I am, what most would consider a lady boy, of hispanic assent.

BlueSmoker

I'm retarded exactually the same way as you consider anyone else to be retarded, I do stupid things, I've posted them. and I pointed out I'm different, once a word makes a person feel different, then we need while communicating with person, to try and not use that word.

Example, you might think I'm gay, in communications with me would you use (or ever imply I'm gay) why would you

Example, you might think my posts are pointless, why would you classifiy them as retard though?

Example you might think my post are intelligent (cause I'm dark), why would you consider anything to do with my skin colour, I might be just stupid, but you wouldn't even know that, until you talk to me

See I'm not really getting this whole retard ****e that everyone given, because I have worked with the "mentally diasabled" and most of them are smarter than me and the rest of you guys. I would love someone to show me what a retard is

And as I have posted in this thread and others have, I've done some prity stupid things, that doesn't make me a retard, never has, it's made me stupid.:)

Plenty of people made me feel ( not retarded) but stupid, it a discrourse most people who actually posted in this thread are considered unfunctional, so yep we are all retarded (silence of our disfunction) But people are allowed to be stupid. as I asked are we just stupid or "really retarded"?

You want to know what a retard is...... go a head define it for me?? I leave it up to you guys.

face1990

BlueSmoker wrote: »

You want to know what a retard is...... go a head define it for me?? I leave it up to you guys.

This thread has nothing to do with being retarded in the sense of being mentally disabled. In this context it means silly or stupid.

Words mean different things in different contexts. (Gay being a very good example).

However, this has been brought up sooooo many times in this thread. Go back and read over those arguments if you want to, I'm not repeating it all.

face1990

BlueSmoker wrote: »

Definition of retarded id, is slow moving to reality, hence why some paint are consindered redardject

Ehhh...... purple monkey dishwasher?

newmug

BlueSmoker wrote: »

Ireland is great, we keep giving out about the ole country, yet no one wants to protect it, and no I'm not looking for arms, I would prefer it people where honest, to me i
that is the most retarded thing an human can do, being dishonest to themselves, I have never once seen a client of mine (with mental disabilities) never as retarded as you guys

Definition of retarded id, is slow moving to reality, hence why some paint are consindered redardject,

Alot of us don't actually really realise the words we we are useing, "retard, ******, fagot, ladyboy, forgein national " do you realease how up setting it is to people, who are try to crate a better country. Let's just use the explain of Ladyboy.

I can defined that to the hilt, but as this thread suggest, we are gob****es, and why shouldn't we be?????

I know I am, what most would consider a lady boy, of hispanic assent.

BlueSmoker wrote: »

I'm retarded exactually the same way as you consider anyone else to be retarded, I do stupid things, I've posted them. and I pointed out I'm different, once a word makes a person feel different, then we need while communicating with person, to try and not use that word.

Example, you might think I'm gay, in communications with me would you use (or ever imply I'm gay) why would you

Example, you might think my posts are pointless, why would you classifiy them as retard though?

Example you might think my post are intelligent (cause I'm dark), why would you consider anything to do with my skin colour, I might be just stupid, but you wouldn't even know that, until you talk to me

See I'm not really getting this whole retard ****e that everyone given, because I have worked with the "mentally diasabled" and most of them are smarter than me and the rest of you guys. I would love someone to show me what a retard is

And as I have posted in this thread and others have, I've done some prity stupid things, that doesn't make me a retard, never has, it's made me stupid.:)

You want to know what a retard is...... go a head define it for me?? I leave it up to you guys.

A ladyboy with bad grammar?

humberklog

Opened and read a thread on Boards starting with " Jews....".

BlueSmoker

newmug wrote: »

A ladyboy with bad grammar?

very true, who would you like to slag next (awww feck I forgotten what I was talking about, now that so bleeding stupid)

Skerries

whats wrong with the term foreign national?

BlueSmoker

Skerries wrote: »

whats wrong with the term foreign national?

Nothing actually, only the way people use it, how who you define a "foreign national". (think of the words, it's an oxmoron)
and while your at it define "retard"

and also "gay"

Curiosity has me abond

BlueSmoker

face1990 wrote: »

This thread has nothing to do with being retarded in the sense of being mentally disabled. In this context it means silly or stupid.

Words mean different things in different contexts. (Gay being a very good example).

However, this has been brought up sooooo many times in this thread. Go back and read over those arguments if you want to, I'm not repeating it all.

Try and expain that to people who hear (that they are retarted!!!) every day of the week, by the way I spent two days reading the whole thread, hence why I post what I did, without using the word "retard(ed)", I was stupid, please define again what you consider an person who is a retard or retarded.

Cause I'm guessing I would fit into your definition, regardless in how you say it, please do go a head, please do

KeithM89_old

BlueSmoker wrote: »

Try and expain that to people who hear (that they are retarted!!!) every day of the week, by the way I spent two days reading the whole thread, hence why I post what I did, without using the word "retard(ed)", I was stupid, please define again what you consider an person who is a retard or retarded.

Cause I'm guessing I would fit into your definition, regardless in how you say it, please do go a head, please do

Enough about the word Retarded ffs.
Tell a story or stay off the thread.

BlueSmoker

KeithM89 wrote: »

Enough about the word Retarded ffs.
Tell a story or stay off the thread.

Ah ok stupidly I slept with women, even though I had no idea I wasn't interested.

Also stupidly I actually denied my artistic side, because I thought they where better than me

Yep I think people are really really stupid, no one more than me

But I was never stupid enough, to cope on people, always have an talent, regardless of who they are. Unfornately that is my talent

petebricquette

BlueSmoker wrote: »

Ah ok stupidly I slept with women, even though I had no idea I wasn't interested.

Also stupidly I actually denied my artistic side, because I thought they where better than me

Yep I think people are really really stupid, no one more than me

But I was never stupid enough, to cope on people, always have an talent, regardless of who they are. Unfornately that is my talent

Thank you very much, Buzz Killington esq.

Most retarded thing I've done (recently) is, while getting everything set up for a lovely bath, I decided to check if the water in the tank was warm.
I picked up the shower nozzle that was attached to the tap, not realising it was set to 'shower' rather than 'bath' and promptly sprayed myself in the face. Soaked my clothes, my book and my mp3 player.

af_thefragile

I did step on a nail once when I was like 5yrs old to see what it would be like. I have no idea what I was thinking, I guess it was mostly like "ooh look a nail sticking out of a plank of wood. I wonder what would happen if I step on it..." Well luckily I was wearing shoes so the nail didn't go in too deep but I still had to visit the hospital.

You do some really retarded things as kids...

SuperInfinity

Recently I spent about 6 hours or maybe even more working on a mirc script thing cause I was trying to do a few things, and I thought I knew regex but it turned out I had the vast majority of it forgotten and I should have simply went back to the very basics of regex tutorials and looked at some examples first, but ended up with loads of spaghetti code and I couldn't remember/figure out what each part was doing... god the ridiculous waste of time and life that was, I don't ever want to do anything like that again.