What Do You Do While Having A Dump?

starbelgrade

Let's face it. Having a poo is a fairly mundane chore, so what do you do to pass the time while you're passing out effluent?

Some people like to read.

Some people are probably reading this whilst breaking a log.

I normally play a game of FIFA on the DS-Nintendo.

So what do you do whilst dropping the kids off at the pool?

Or do you just stare at the wall and grimace?

Lab_Mouse

what a strange question

AlmightyCushion

Have a ****. Saves time especially at work.

KeithM89_old

Catch up on this weeks Heat magazine, write a few pages from my Autobiography or usually just stare at wall hoping i dont leave skidmarks...

Mint Sauce

turn to the empty loo roll holder in horror.

foxinsox

can we post about Biffo and the IMF please? :pac:

Joey the lips

Puuuussssshhhhhhh pant pant pant pant Puuuuuussssshhhhhh Pant pant pant..... wait for the splash... Lift me arse so it does not get wet.....

qz

Read a classic car mag or play with the apps on my phone.

Smartly Dressed

I've tried reading but it's over so fast I barely get to open the book.

Babalons

Play a game on me Android phone. Or watch a you-tube vid. This also causes a condition known as 'numb arse' due to excessive time spent on the pot. Unfortunately there is no app to cure this condition..... YET!

Plug

Listen to tunes on the phone.

johnn

......Get head off your Mah.

Turtyturd

AlmightyCushion wrote: »

Have a ****. Saves time especially at work.

Hope you don't use the same jacks roll....I usually just read, once you get pins and needles in your legs its time to get up. Sometimes I will take the ipod in and listen to a song or two.

rednik

Sudoku, harder level for a tougher crap.

Mister men

Nothing that's my quiet time during the day.

BrianJD

Browse boards.ie on my phone. I HATE forgetting my phone when going to the toilet....

starbelgrade

johnn wrote: »

......Get head off your Mah.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ta_8m8qAca0

Sauve

Blow my nose. It helps the whole process
Win-win

Fromvert

Read the info on gels/sprays/shampoos/shower gel.

Bodhisopha

I have a little hand-held FM/AM radio that i like to play around with whilst having a poo. I put it onto AM and see what strange radio stations i can receive. This is a pretty pointless exercise during the day as you can't pick up so many stations for whatever reason, so i try to save my poos for when it's dark, which is obviously easier this time of the year.

No lie.

Babalons

Fromvert wrote: »

Read the info on gels/sprays/shampoos/shower gel.

Indeed, damn that cheap Afghan toothpaste. No reading value on it at all!!

Absurdum

Squeeze

starbelgrade

Bodhisopha wrote: »

I have a little hand-held FM/AM radio that i like to play around with whilst having a poo. I put it onto AM and see what strange radio stations i can receive. This is a pretty pointless exercise during the day as you can't pick up so many stations for whatever reason, so i try to save my poos for when it's dark, which is obviously easier this time of the year.

No lie.

That is extremely odd.

strokemyclover

Its After Hours, Its a thread about a toilet on Friday night, there's been 23 responses so far in the thread's 11 minute lifespan!!!!

I heard life gets better but I do have doubts!

Rabble Rabble

Am I the only person who sh*ts and gets off the pot as quickly as possible?

cleremy jarkson

Fromvert wrote: »

Read the info on gels/sprays/shampoos/shower gel.

Lol i actually avoid taking other reading material into the bathroom because i know there will be lots of shampoo bottles to read and hyphenated ingredients to try to memorise.

johnn

Pray I don't get the dreaded "Ring Sting".

Paddy Samurai

Joey the lips wrote: »

Puuuussssshhhhhhh pant pant pant pant Puuuuuussssshhhhhh Pant pant pant..... wait for the splash... Lift me arse so it does not get wet.....

Play bomber pilot ...........move arse sideways to drop in on the side of the bowl...........it slides in with barely a ripple.

Dambusters eat yer heart out!.:D

Bodhisopha

starbelgrade wrote: »

That is extremely odd.

Well, i'd be a reader but i end up disappointed when a poo goes off without a hitch and i have to stop reading sooner than i'd like to.

I've heard hanging around on the toilet reading promotes 'roids. I read that in the little leaflet that comes with a tube of Anusol.

Joe C

Podcast + Angry Birds.

MayoForSam

I used to play 'Battlestar Galactica' (the original one with Lorne Green as Adama) as a young lad while sitting on 'the throne' - attacking the bath (i.e. the battlestar) with a comb (the cylons).

Who needs an iPhone when your imagination can suffice?

phill106

surf on iphone (poopreports.com a very apt site)
sickipedia
maybe a bit of sky news/rte news

Generally best not to do all these one after the other, otherwise people may send a search party for you.

clonadlad

I usually try to go to Paul's when I do one. Not much craic in his bathroom. The room does smell nice in fairness after.

Rented Mule

Angry Birds and Ragdoll Blaster2 on the iPhone.

Sitec

I do nothing, i sh1t in about 40 seconds. Never understood the whole 40 minutes having a **** idea.

Swampy

Along time ago... Smoke a spliff while having a dump. That's relaxing.

baldbear

Read Aldi/Lidl booklets. Great poo time reading there!

Oranage2

the ingredients on a shampoo bottle!

General General

Fromvert wrote: »

Read the info on gels/sprays/shampoos/shower gel.

+1

I can speak fairly limited Dutch, Swedish, Danish, Norwegian, Finnish, Chinese, Arabic, Czech, Turkish, Hungarian & Ukrainian.

My pronunciation isn't the best, though...

fudgez

I draw picture of poo and post them too the internet and chat with other pooing people using iPoo (easily the best app on the iPhone) its like twitter fr pooing! http://appshopper.com/social-networking/ipoo-bored-while-you-poo

Terry

I generally weep due to the amount of lame excrement related threads in AH.
Then I think of the ones started by FlutteringBantam and I cheer up.

That or read the paper.

johnn

Make sure to avoid the splash-back from the Shit hitting the water....especially if I've pissed first.

Jake93

Can't go wrong with a nice aul fig roll and a dump at the same time

Big Lar

Keep thinking to myself

Remember to open the window

Remember to open the window

But to my wife's disgust I always forget

wilson10

rednik wrote: »

Sudoku, harder level for a tougher crap.

Do you work it out with a pencil

blaze1

play a game on me phone... snooker or the angry birds normally helps to relax

bogtreader

Clear texts on my phone or play tetris

pablomakaveli

This is me on the can. Except i'm not completely naked. I usually have revelations while sitting on the toilet.

redtom33

Plan out my day.

Svetti Arss

AlmightyCushion wrote: »

Have a ****. Saves time especially at work.

Have you been on Big Brother?

junkyarddog

wilson10 wrote: »

Do you work it out with a pencil

The old ones are the best:D

I just hope it always comes out clean,saves on the paperwork:p