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anyone have cv writing experience

  • 03-12-2010 3:17pm
    #1
    alanhiggyno1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,498 ✭✭✭


    hi people dont know if have right room so im asking does anybody have experience of writing cv or good at lying on one as im trying to write a cv now..if anybody has a fake one i could look at would be just great..any help would be great.thanks


Comments

  • #2
    alwaysadub
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,554 ✭✭✭✭alwaysadub


    Er, don't lie too much on your CV.
    it'll come back to bite you on the arse!


  • #3
    Danbo!
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,942 ✭✭✭Danbo!


    Just tell them your name is Alan Higgy and you're No.1.

    They'd be stupid not to hire you.


  • #4
    SeaFields
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,551 ✭✭✭SeaFields


    Just goggle it. There'll be plenty of examples up there and don't lie either.


  • #5
    alanhiggyno1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,498 ✭✭✭alanhiggyno1


    they know that already..anyone have a good cv


  • #6
    tommyhaas
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,100 ✭✭✭tommyhaas


    anyone have cv writing experience

    Probably half the country the way things are going


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  • #7
    DrumSteve
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,798 ✭✭✭✭DrumSteve


    dont need no cv for the dole...


  • #8
    alanhiggyno1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,498 ✭✭✭alanhiggyno1


    just honest answers plz...anybody know of good cv..im not spending 50 quid for someone to write another for me


  • #9
    alwaysadub
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,554 ✭✭✭✭alwaysadub


    alanhiggyno1 wrote: »
    they know that already..anyone have a good cv


    Yeah,hold on there and i'll send you mine.
    I'll stick my bank details at the bottom of it too


  • #10
    alanhiggyno1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,498 ✭✭✭alanhiggyno1


    put ur wifes number there aswell too....


  • #11
    alwaysadub
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,554 ✭✭✭✭alwaysadub


    I've a wife?!

    When did i turn gay:eek:


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  • #12
    EverEvolving
    Registered Users Posts: 1,272 ✭✭✭EverEvolving


    There are a lot of good suggestions on this forum

    http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/forumdisplay.php?f=10

    Good Luck, you would nearly need a gold plated cv to get a job nowadays


  • #13
    Delirium
    Moderators Posts: 51,860 ✭✭✭✭Delirium


    alanhiggyno1 wrote: »
    hi people dont know if have right room so im asking does anybody have experience of writing cv or good at lying on one as im trying to write a cv now..if anybody has a fake one i could look at would be just great..any help would be great.thanks

    A rough draft of a CV for ya.
    NAME: alanhiggyno1.

    SEX:Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.

    DESIRED POSITION:Company’s President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever’s available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn’t be applying here in the first place.

    DESI RED SALARY:€100,000 a year plus stock options. If that’s not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.

    EDUCATION:Yes.

    LAST POSITION HELD:Target for middle management hostility.

    SALARY:Less than I’m worth.

    MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT:My incredible collection of stolen pens and ‘post-it’ notes.

    REASON FOR LEAVING:It sucked.

    AVAILABLE FOR WORK:Of course. That’s why I’m applying.

    PREFERRED HOURS:1:30 – 3:30pm., Monday, Tuesday and Thursday.

    DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?:Yes, but they’re better suited to a more intimate environment.

    MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?:If I had one, would I be here?

    DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LI FTI NG UPTO 50lbs?:50lbs. of what?

    DO YOU HAVE A CAR?:I think the appropriate question here would be “Do you have a car that runs?”

    DO YOU SMOKE?:On the job, no, on my breaks, yes.

    WHAT WOULD YOU LI KE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?:Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb blond supermodel who thinks I’m the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I’d like to be doing that now.

    DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?:Yes. Absolutely.

    SIGN HERE:Aries .

    There ya go, hope that helps:P

    If you can read this, you're too close!



  • #14
    biko
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 81,220 ✭✭✭✭biko


    EverEvolving wrote: »
    There are a lot of good suggestions on this forum

    http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/forumdisplay.php?f=10

    Good Luck, you would nearly need a gold plated cv to get a job nowadays
    Use this forum OP, good luck.


This discussion has been closed.
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