2 Funnies

MonkieSocks

Three nurses working in a morgue discover a dead man with a hard on.

First nurse says cant let that go 2 wastes and rides him, Second nurse does the same.

Third nurse hesitates and says she is on her period but does him anyway..!

Then the man sits up and the nurses apologise saying they thought he was dead.

Man replies saying he was but after 2 jump starts and a blood transfusion he feels better than ever...

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Sister Mary Ann, who worked for a home health agency, was out making her rounds visiting homebound patients when she ran out of gas.

As luck would have it, a Texaco Gasoline station was just a block away.

She walked to the station to borrow a gas can and buy some gas.

The attendant told her that the only gas can had been loaned out, but she could wait until it was returned.

However, Sister Mary Ann was on the way to see a patient, so she decided not to wait... and walked back to her car.

She looked for something in her car that she could fill with gas and spotted the bedpan she was taking to the patient!

Always resourceful, Sister Mary Ann carried the bedpan to the station, filled it with gasoline, and carried the full bedpan back to her car.

As she was pouring the gas into her tank, two Protestants watched from across the street.

One of them turned to the other and said,

'If it starts, I'm turning Catholic.'