Paying rent at home

DOC09UNAM

Since i've been 17 i've rarely lived at home, moved over to england for work and lived with my aunt, paid my way and bought my own food, when I came back I moved in with friends for a while, then I lost my job.

So i was back home for a few months, paying my rent out of my savings, until I got a job in a different city, now I am living with complete strangers and it's grand craic.

Pay your way tbh and dont be stingy.

smokie2008

RoverJames wrote: »

The irony is the OP drives a 7 series BMW :pac:

Seriously??:eek:

You know how much those things cost to run?? Obviously well paid:mad:

stovelid

RoverJames wrote: »

The irony is the OP drives a 7 series BMW :pac:

In fairness to the OP, he said he paid rent and did come here asking if it was too low.

fkiely

Start a brothel in your room and give your mum a cut. Everyone is a winner.

sexydancer

I paid half my wage

doubtfir3

To me it depends on two things:

1. how much the OP has to "spare"
2. what is being done with the rent

OP, if you are earning a packet and your mother for example sees you buying loads of useless crap and in general wasting money then perhaps its her way of trying to get you to be a little more responsible?

If this is not the case, perhaps your mother sees things increasing in price and wants to even things up somewhat.. take into account at least 5 showers a week, five meals a week, laundry, light and heat and presumably sky/ntl and internet and tbh I don't think paying 100 would be too much.

The second point, if your parents have just enough or are struggling then perhaps they need the money to pay for the "extras" you are adding to their household expenses.

If not then I know of two situations with friends of mine where their mother opened a bank account and lodged all the "rent" her 2 kids who stayed at home paid. She kept account of how many payments they made and when the first and then the second moved out to buy their own house she handed them each a cheque equalling the "rent" they had paid over the previous couple of years.

All depends really but I wouldn't sweat it.. as mentioned above just think if you pay 50 now, and then move on to own a house of your own at some point in the future its gonna cost you at least 200 a week.. just for the mortgage...

Son Of A Vidic

The OP pays €50 a week, which would have been pretty miserly 10 years ago never mind today.

lol5605

I never asked to be born, **** that.

xw2lj9uspm1eyh

If you're working "mad hours" the extra money they're asking for shouldn't be a problem to you.Even though you say you're rarely there and have only one meal a day.I'm sure someone must do your washing for you if you have that hectic of a schedule that you're not at home often and who's paying for the electricity that your laptop/pc is using while you're posting on boards :P.You pay them at the moment just over €7 a day I'm sure you would have no qualms handing over a lot more then that to a barman during the weekend.

TrollHammaren

TrollHammaren wrote: »

I haven't lived with parents since I was 17, so I wouldn't exactly be the authority on this, but I've noticed the difference between my friends who pay their keep at home and those who don't: my friends who pay are responsible and mature, by all accounts, and the others are just lazy manchildren. I'm not claiming causality here, but take from that what you will.

I reckon it's only fair to pay for what you consume, rather than paying "rent" to your parents. You should pay for the food you eat, do your own washing, help out around the house, and share the cost of bills. No 20-something year old should be a financial burden on their parents. However, parents shouldn't make a profit from their children, either.

That's a bit too black and white though. My parents had it a lot easier in their early twenties than I did. They got a free college education while I had to take out student loans as well as working, so I graduated with loads of debt which I'll be paying off for years. A lot of people tell me I shouldn't take anything from my parents at my age (25) but then those people were supported through college while I wasn't. I take very little and have been pretty much independent since I was 21 but if I moved home (which I probably wouldn't as the folks live in the middle of nowhere), I wouldn't expect to be charged rent. That would seem silly, as the parents have a big house with most of the rooms lying empty. They have to heat it whether I'm there or not, they pay the Sky and the broadband whether I'm there or not. My dad wouldn't really miss a few hundred quid each month whereas I'd be completely broke from paying it if I had no job , a crap job or was on SW. I'd like to think that they'd give the opportunity to save money so I could move on.

dark crystal

partyatmygaff wrote: »

I'll never understand paying rent to your own parents. I don't know about anyone else's parents but mine would never accept let alone ask for rent. It's just unimaginable.

It's called financial responsibility. Why should anyone who brings in a wage not contribute anything to the household in which they live?

I find that unimaginable!

mistyd

I'd see no problem with children staying in the family home into their 20's, especially in the current climate as its harder to secure mortgage.. I would think its common at the moment.. I would expect my children to pay 'keep' as we called it in my parents house. All my family paid rent to parents as soon as they were earning and even if claiming. Its not about the money (my parents didn't need the money) but the fact that as an adult you should be paying your own way, how else would you learn to be independent.. usually around the 50-70 euro area

In saying that, when my brother was saving for a mortgage a few years back, my parents didn't take rent off him, he just paid his broadband and sky..

Pherekydes

This question frequently comes up.

I can't understand how an adult earning their own money can't contribute to their own living expenses and costs no matter where they live.

Odats

I have no problems handing up money to the parents was 400 per month when working and 25 per week when I wasn't. Sure if you were out in a flat/house wouldn't you be paying rent same principle but with additional perks.
Also, people have for generations sent money home to parents when working abroad aswell.
It's about responsibility.

Voodoomelon

stovelid wrote: »

In fairness to the OP, he said he paid rent and did come here asking if it was too low.

Not only that, I fail to see how a car worth €7k tops which i'm paying a loan on has anything to do with it.

Wompa1

Why not move in with strangers? Take the plunge.

TrollHammaren

Rebekah Hot Tarantula wrote: »

That's a bit too black and white though. My parents had it a lot easier in their early twenties than I did. They got a free college education while I had to take out student loans as well as working, so I graduated with loads of debt which I'll be paying off for years. A lot of people tell me I shouldn't take anything from my parents at my age (25) but then those people were supported through college while I wasn't. I take very little and have been pretty much independent since I was 21 but if I moved home (which I probably wouldn't as the folks live in the middle of nowhere), I wouldn't expect to be charged rent. That would seem silly, as the parents have a big house with most of the rooms lying empty. They have to heat it whether I'm there or not, they pay the Sky and the broadband whether I'm there or not. My dad wouldn't really miss a few hundred quid each month whereas I'd be completely broke from paying it if I had no job , a crap job or was on SW. I'd like to think that they'd give the opportunity to save money so I could move on.

What you're describing there doesn't sound like a financial burden, as it's clear your parents are pretty well off. A financial burden would be if the extra food and electricity put a dent into their finances, which it doesn't sound like it does in your case. I should have left the word "financial" out in my previous statement, as having to cook for, clean up after, and washing the clothes of a 20-something would be worse than them not contributing financially. I do, however, believe that someone who can afford a 7 series BMW should cover the costs of what they consume in the house, and should definitely do all their own chores.

I'm ambivalent about the idea of parents paying for students living in their house. My knee-jerk reaction is to say students living at home have it too easy, but I realise how difficult putting myself through University these past 3 and a half years has been, and I wouldn wish it on my own kids. I would say everyone living in their parents' house should contribute to the upkeep of the house, at least by doing chores. I don't like the idea, however, of parents giving their 20-somethings money to go out on weekends.

I'm rambling a bit, but my point is that if you're over 20, earning enough money, and living with your parents, you should at the very least cover the cost of you living there, and help out around the house. And for the love Satan, do your own washing! :-P

noodler

starbelgrade wrote: »

Fucking hell.

So this is where my tax dollars go... to fund layabouts living with mammy & getting their dinners cooked for them?

And I used to think that social welfare was for the purposes of helping the needy.

starbelgrade wrote: »

Any 20 something, still living at home with their parents is a loss - no matter how much money they are paying them.

starbelgrade wrote: »

I give it up regularly.

To the tax man.

.

Ah come on, would you give over with your overwhelming moral authority.

There are plenty of people out there living at him who are actually providing a net benefit to their parents in the current climate - not hard to imagine.

If you go on about tax one more time I'll cry.

If the son/daughter is unemployed and living at home then surely the paretns could argue they shouldn't have to pay every penny and would be entitled to some of their social welfare to run the household.

Badgermonkey

partyatmygaff wrote: »

I'll never understand paying rent to your own parents. I don't know about anyone else's parents but mine would never accept let alone ask for rent. It's just unimaginable.

Hardly preparing you for the real world then.

If they only took it to allow them a dinner out somewhere nice each week that;d be a good thing.

Of course they are perfectly entitled to say no.

partyatmygaff

Badgermonkey wrote: »

Hardly preparing you for the real world then.

If they only took it to allow them a dinner out somewhere nice each week that;d be a good thing.

Of course they are perfectly entitled to say no.

Well considering i'm only 17 it'd be a bit difficult for me to pay them anything anyway. That's not the point however.

neil_hosey

the fact that people wouldnt be willing to give their parents money after them putting you up for 18 years atleast is scabby..

If ur parents are loaded, 50 a week is fine. If they are struggling, then 80/90 fair.

Badgermonkey

partyatmygaff wrote: »

Well considering i'm only 17 it'd be a bit difficult for me to pay them anything anyway. That's not the point however.

Your orig post says you'll never understand why people pay their parents rent.

Trust me, you'll understand, just maybe not now.

partyatmygaff

Badgermonkey wrote: »

Your orig post says you'll never understand why people pay their parents rent.

Trust me, you'll understand, just maybe not now.

No, I doubt that I will. At least not in the context of my own family anyway. Giving money to your parents outright is fine by me (As in giving them money even if you aren't living at home anymore). Giving money as rent as if your parents are your landlord just doesn't sound right to me.

noodler

partyatmygaff wrote: »

No, I doubt that I will. At least not in the context of my own family anyway. Giving money to your parents outright is fine by me (As in giving them money even if you aren't living at home anymore). Giving money as rent as if your parents are your landlord just doesn't sound right to me.

Again, if your own parents are wealthy enough not to miss it then that is fine but come on - think a little outside the box in circumstances outside your own.

Badgermonkey

partyatmygaff wrote: »

No, I doubt that I will. At least not in the context of my own family anyway. Giving money to your parents outright is fine by me (As in giving them money even if you aren't living at home anymore). Giving money as rent as if your parents are your landlord just doesn't sound right to me.

What about self respect?

You're 17, hopefully in full health and capable of earning, be that a part time job, ebay or whatever.

You are de facto a financial burden on the household, a contribution to that household would be a wholly positive thing. Rent is merely a word, to make a contribution is to 'front up' in a sense.

You can say 'it's not required of me, so I don't do it' but I'd trust your old enough and smart enough to see the fallacy in that position.

weldoninhio

I've a shit job, pay E80 a week to my mum, pay for my Sky and also pay for my mums NTL. I have a loan that i pay E400 a month off, sometimes money is tight but thats life. Get used to it

Greyfox

partyatmygaff wrote: »

Giving money as rent as if your parents are your landlord just doesn't sound right to me.

Why not? Once a person gets to 18 their meant to be a fully grown adult capable of looking after themselves, the parents have done the job of raising you as well as making some sacrafices to pay off a morgage etc

I think if a person was working full time and lives at home not handing up money would be disgusting and show a clear disrespect for their parents. once your old enough to contribute a person should do this out of principle

partyatmygaff

noodler wrote: »

Again, if your own parents are wealthy enough not to miss it then that is fine but come on - think a little outside the box in circumstances outside your own.

It's not a question of wealth. In my family, it just wouldn't be the done thing for parents to request rent off their kids. Just to be clear i'm not averse to giving my parents money outright (Even if I no longer live at home).

Badgermonkey wrote: »

What about self respect?

Well I doubt many if any 17 year olds pay their parents "rent" anyway. Some of you are misunderstanding me. I amn't averse to giving my parents money. In fact, once I can I'll have no qualms giving them money outright (Again, even if I no longer live at home).

Badgermonkey

Greyfox wrote: »

Why not? Once a person gets to 18 their meant to be a fully grown adult capable of looking after themselves, the parents have done the job of raising you as well as making some sacrafices to pay off a morgage etc

I think if a person was working full time and lives at home not handing up money would be disgusting and show a clear disrespect for their parents. once your old enough to contribute a person should do this out of principle

The poster is 17 and presumably only capable of part time employment.

noodler

partyatmygaff wrote: »

It's not a question of wealth. In my family, it just wouldn't be the done thing for parents to request rent off their kids. Just to be clear i'm not averse to giving my parents money outright (Even if I no longer live at home).

You are 17 and in full time education I assume so in your circumstances I can fully understand and agree.

If a household only has one breadwinner for example (a serious possibility given the last few years), increasing mortgage repayments etc etc etc then you honestly feel the parents should bleed themselves dry, denying themself even the smallest luxury, when one of their children (outside of fulltime education lets say) is in a position to help?

Dudess

partyatmygaff wrote: »

I'll never understand paying rent to your own parents.

Even in the case of adults?

Badgermonkey

Final word, you're right, most 17 year olds don't contribute, you say you can't.

Badgermonkey wrote: »

You're 17, hopefully in full health and capable of earning, be that a part time job, ebay or whatever.

partyatmygaff

Dudess wrote: »

Even in the case of adults?

Yes, even in the case of adults. Formally "paying rent" to my parents is just unimaginable in my family (Note MY family). Personally i'd give my parents money whether or not I was still living at home with them.

Dudess

I meant when you said it's something you don't understand - it's perfectly understandable that a person who's, say, 25 and living with their parents/in full-time employment makes a financial contribution to the household no? I don't think a formal tenant-landlord agreement is being referred to here either, just, as I said, a financial contribution.

partyatmygaff

Dudess wrote: »

I meant when you said it's something you don't understand - it's perfectly understandable that a person who's, say, 25 and living with their parents/in full-time employment makes a financial contribution to the household no? I don't think a formal tenant-landlord agreement is being referred to here either, just, as I said, a financial contribution.

A financial contribution is perfectly acceptable. Calling it rent would make it seem that you only make that financial contribution so long as you live at home. That's what I disagree with.

grungepants

for christ sake

Forest Master

partyatmygaff wrote: »

I'll never understand paying rent to your own parents. I don't know about anyone else's parents but mine would never accept let alone ask for rent. It's just unimaginable.

I moved back home when I was 21 for 1 year - my Mam never asked me to pay anything, nor would she - but I did anyway because I have a sense of decency & responsibility to pay my own way in life. I gave her €100 pw, I bought food for the house (+ washing powder, etc) and also paid towards bills.
It's not "unimaginable", as you say - its just being decent. You don't have to be asked to do something in order for your moral compass to realise that it's simply the right thing to do.

starbelgrade

noodler wrote: »

.

Ah come on, would you give over with your overwhelming moral authority.

There are plenty of people out there living at him who are actually providing a net benefit to their parents in the current climate - not hard to imagine.

Since when was having & expressing an opinion considered as an "overwhelming moral authority"?

If someone is living at home & paying money to their parents, then that's their business.... to me, however, I think it's a bit sad that a grown up can't act like one & not depend on their parents. If it were my child, I'd be disappointed in both them & how I raised them.

partyatmygaff

Forest Master wrote: »

I moved back home when I was 21 for 1 year - my Mam never asked me to pay anything, nor would she - but I did anyway because I have a sense of decency & responsibility to pay my own way in life.

I amn't being indecent or irresponsible. I'm only 17 so and am still at school so it's not as if i'm planning on living off my parents for the remainder of my life.

I gave her €100 pw, I bought food for the house (+ washing powder, etc) and also paid towards bills.
It's not "unimaginable", as you say - its just being decent. You don't have to be asked to do something in order for your moral compass to realise that it's simply the right thing to do.

If you had bothered reading the rest of my posts in the thread without jumping on to your high horse to talk about moral compasses you would have seen that I clarified what I meant by that post.

Forest Master

partyatmygaff wrote: »

If you had bothered reading the rest of my posts in the thread without jumping on to your high horse to talk about moral compasses you would have seen that I clarified what I meant by that post.

I amn't being indecent or irresponsible. I'm only 17 so and am still at school so it's not as if i'm planning on living off my parents for the remainder of my life.

Eh, I quoted your whole post. You said nothing about being 17 in it. Of course you shouldn't be paying your parents when you're 17.

And are you trying to say that none of your single posts can be read & taken as such, for fear of being taken out of context? i.e. they can only be quoted and replied to once the replier has read all of your other posts too? That's not really how forums work, mate.

watsgone

I dont pay any rent at home, the parents would never ask me for it and refuse point blank any time I offered them some.

I instead paid for some things they needed around the house a new fridge things like that, and I pay for things for my little sister, the odd clothing, cd or school trip.

I feel I am paying my dues that way

partyatmygaff

Forest Master wrote: »

Eh, I quoted your whole post. You said nothing about being 17 in it. Of course you shouldn't be paying your parents when you're 17.

And are you trying to say that none of your single posts can be read & taken as such, for fear of being taken out of context? i.e. they can only be quoted and replied to once the replier has read all of your other posts too? That's not really how forums work, mate.

Well a thread is a large discussion. It's a "thread" of posts in other words. Each post follows consequentially on those previous and when a posters makes more than one post in a thread they are often either making another point or in this case elaborating on and/or clarifying a previous point. I've 9 posts in this thread, each following upon the previous. To take my first post without looking at the other 8 is a bit foolish.

MagicSean

partyatmygaff wrote: »

I'll never understand paying rent to your own parents. I don't know about anyone else's parents but mine would never accept let alone ask for rent. It's just unimaginable.

partyatmygaff wrote: »

I amn't being indecent or irresponsible. I'm only 17 so and am still at school so it's not as if i'm planning on living off my parents for the remainder of my life.

If you had bothered reading the rest of my posts in the thread without jumping on to your high horse to talk about moral compasses you would have seen that I clarified what I meant by that post.

Who cares if you are seventeen? If you're earning money give some towards your upkeep. If you aren't earning make it up by doing some work around the house. Simples.

Forest Master

partyatmygaff wrote: »

Well a thread is a large discussion. It's a "thread" of posts in other words. Each post follows consequentially on those previous and when a posters makes more than one post in a thread they are often either making another point or in this case elaborating on and/or clarifying a previous point. I've 9 posts in this thread, each following upon the previous. To take my first post without looking at the other 8 is a bit foolish.

So you're saying your first post isn't valid?

partyatmygaff

Forest Master wrote: »

So you're saying your first post isn't valid?

Read my last post again, emphasis on the words elaborating and clarification.

k_mac wrote: »

Who cares if you are seventeen? If you're earning money give some towards your upkeep. If you aren't earning make it up by doing some work around the house. Simples.

I amn't earning money anymore, I quit a part time job that I had (On the advice of my parents) so that I can focus on my LC. Even back when I did have a part time job my parents would never have accepted a cent from me.

To sum it up, they pay for me until i'm able to pay for them!

TheProdigy

Forest Master wrote: »

So you're saying your first post isn't valid?

Maybe he should edit it and deny he posted it at all, you seem to have a dab hand at such antics.

livvy

partyatmygaff wrote: »

I'll never understand paying rent to your own parents. I don't know about anyone else's parents but mine would never accept let alone ask for rent. It's just unimaginable.

I think you should change your user name to "partyatmyparentsgaff"

Should have read the full thread first ! you beat me starbelgrade !

starbelgrade wrote: »

You should change your username to Party-At-My-Gaff-Just-Let-Me-Check-To-See-If-Mammy-&-Daddy-Aren't-At-Home-First.

Forest Master

partyatmygaff wrote: »

Read my last post again, emphasis on the words elaborating and clarification.

So your posts aren't valid unless you elaborate on them? What about your 9 posts in this thread? Are they valid yet, or do they need to be elaborated & clarified on some more before you stand by them? Where does it stop?

Maybe he should edit it and deny he posted it at all, you seem to have a dab hand at such antics.

Go back & look at the timestamps in that thread. I edited my post BEFORE that guy quoted me - not after. So if he posted after me, why didn't he quote my edited post?

partyatmygaff

Forest Master wrote: »

So your posts aren't valid unless you elaborate on them? What about your 9 posts in this thread? Are they valid yet, or do they need to be elaborated & clarified on some more before you stand by them? Where does it stop?

They're perfectly valid on their own. People had already replied with similar posts to yours and I had already elaborated and clarified the meaning of my first post. Your post wouldn't have been necessary had you read my later posts.

bmarley

My daughter has moved back in after year of living independently. She is getting 90 euro on social welfare as she is under 21. I don't ask her to contribute anything as she goes to college part-time and has to pay travel expenses. She buys her own clothes and cigarettes and has a little left over for her social life. She does help around the house and does the cooking now and again. I do not expect her to buy her own food. I understand that she cannot at present afford her own flat but is striving towards it..in the meantime (and for a short period only) I am willing to support her needs.