Childbirth

Feeona

CK2010 wrote: »

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straight afterwards i was bombarded with degrading comments about how a good mum tries to breastfeed and i should 'at least try', i was so distraught from the labour that my boyfriend had to stand up for me and tell them that they know and i know that ive already decided whats best on the issue. if he wasnt there i swear they would have bullied me into it.

I don't understand why it's considered a good idea to stress out a new mother (who's already stressed and worried about her new role) by pushing breast feeding. How can that be good for the baby?

Talk about trying to make you feel like a failure!

CK2010

Feeona wrote: »

I don't understand why it's considered a good idea to stress out a new mother (who's already stressed and worried about her new role) by pushing breast feeding. How can that be good for the baby?

Talk about trying to make you feel like a failure!

exactly what my boyfriend said, except not as politely!

i think they expect new mothers to just be so overwhelmed that they'll try it once labour is over and done with. like that they'll be so emotional that they'll want to do anything to 'bond' with baby. which i think is really wrong. a mother should make an informed and rational decision about it because it needs to be done right and with a degree of confidence for it to work for them both. they discussed it with me every visit and even made me sign a form to say they told me the pros of BF!

the fact i hadnt eaten a proper meal for nine months due to chronic sickness and was suffering from severe anaemia, and the fact that i wouldnt have time to express milk while attending college didnt matter to them.
not that a mother even needs to give a reason for choosing not to BF. its an issue that really bugs me-i have alot of respect for mothers who do breastfeed but i dont think any mother should be made feel inadequate (especially by doctors/midwives) if she chooses not to. regardless of why she chooses not to.

i also think that if a mother has chosen not to BF and is then "persuaded" by medical staff to try then shes not going to be entirely comfortable in doing so and it will more than likely lead to difficulties in feeding for both mother and baby which is definitely not better for baby and stresses mum out further which just adds to any insecurities/worries/feelings of inadequacy she already has.

all just my opinion of course, but its something that drivesme mad!

sorry- you've set me off on yet another rant! :P i have many bottled up!

How Strange

CK2010 that's despicable. I'm almost due my first and I'm determined to bf because I believe it's the best thing for my baby. However it's every mothers choice to bf or bottle feed. Also I don't see the advantages of forcing bf-ing on a new mum who hasn't prepared herself for it previously. It may be natural but by all accounts it can be very tough at the beginning so you really have to be determined to stick with it no matter what. Forcing it on mums and making them feel inferior for 'not giving it a go' is ridiculous and completely counter productive in terms of promoting bf-ing.

Being a new mum is a frightening enough experience (I'm terrified already and I'm waiting on my new arrival) so what we need is support not coercion from the hospital staff.

Ickle Magoo

Could we steer this discussion back into the relevant waters please and away from the always emotive breast Vs bottle debate please.

Many thanks. :cool:

CK2010

Ickle Magoo wrote: »

Could we steer this discussion back into the relevant waters please and away from the always emotive breast Vs bottle debate please.

Many thanks. :cool:

sorry, wasnt my intention, was more about the issue of medical staff trying to pressure mothers into what they want as opposed to whats truely best for mother and baby (which most mothers know themselves, regardless of what medical staff say)- BF just seems to be the issue where this becomes most evident!

however, back on topic, another example of this was when the nurse was admiring my daughter in the cot and she said 'u need to keep her hands under the blanket cause babies like to be swaddled, she wont like her arms being left in the cold like that' and i told her no my daughter likes her hands out of the blanket and she refused to accept this and swaddled her- what do you know, she started screaming the place down and then stopped the minute her hands were free! :rolleyes:

this was also something her grandmother never accepted either,always covered her up to her neck!