Really stupid things chefs do!

the beer revolu

Sometimes I think some chefs are just mad.

For example, this morning I ordered porridge in Punch's Hotel, Limerick.
Now, porridge is a pretty personal thing - we all like it differently, some creamier and some thicker - and people put different things on it - butter, cream, sugar, honey, fruit, cinnamon etc. etc.
Personally, I like mine plain made with half milk and half water.
The chef in Punch's, however, decided that I'd like nothing more than powdered chocolate and icing sugar all over the top of my porridge.
WTF WTF WTF!!!!!!

Maybe he's just mad!

Nevyn

I hope you sent it back.

the beer revolu

Thaedydal wrote: »

I hope you sent it back.

I didn't have time:mad:
It was a generous bowl of porrige, though, so I was able to spoon off the offending 'decoration' and still have a decent bowl full.

grandslamsmith

How was the porridge though?

I've worked with chefs who can decorate but that's about all they can do - alarm bells should ring when food looks too dressed or 'oddly' decorative.

Millers Pizza, by the way, on Baggot street present you with a building on their pizza suffice to say they are quiet bad.

Slam

the beer revolu

grandslamsmith wrote: »

How was the porridge though?

Porrige would have been fine if not for the chocolate and sugar - a bit too stodgy for my taste but everyone's different!

scottie pippen

grandslamsmith wrote: »

How was the porridge though?

Millers Pizza, by the way, on Baggot street present you with a building on their pizza suffice to say they are quiet bad.

Slam

did they just pile up what ever they had handy and hope the best?

got a pizza in Franky and Benny's over in the uk, it was chicken a ceaser pizza, the menu listed the toppings, sounded tasty enough - but the menu didn't mention that they would be putting white ceaser salad dressing on it.

It looked like they put half a bottle on it, the pizza was a big slimy mess.

grandslamsmith

My 'Pizza' in Millers had a constructed mound of fried onions peppers and artichoke and as a result (like yours) the pizza itself was a hefty, creaking, oily mess which I sent back and walked out on.

One of the biggest WTF moments in dinning I have ever had. <snip>

Slam

The Hill Billy

Slam - Tone down the lingo please. We could do without such descriptions here.

Thanks,

HB

grandslamsmith

Hill Billy wrote: »

Slam - Tone down the lingo please. We could do without such descriptions here.

Thanks,

HB

You get my point then.

The Hill Billy

My point is that other posters should not have to read descriptions such as the one you posted.

Back on topic.

HB

olaola

I cannot ABIDE crap thrown around the edges of the plate for 'decoration' - like parsely/paprika. ARG.

Eviledna

I don't know if it's a "Heston-fluence" or not, but a couple of times I've been out for dinner and some manner of desert, be it creme brulee or panna cotta has been infiltrated by popping candy. That's right, space dust. I'm all for experimentation, but it just didn't work either time.

Also, will rasperry coulis ever feck off?

neuro-praxis

I like pesto, but not drizzled around my burger, steak or roast chicken. Why chefs are doing this is beyond me. I have taken to saying I am allergic to it.

the beer revolu

Or the one more common in canteen like places:

"I know what would finish that plate off nicely: some green dust that was once parsley!"

On the OP: Email sent to hotel and satisfactorily responded to (I think the chef will get a telling off).

tomcollins97

Why do chefs have to put a 'salad garish' on every dish? Half dead lettuce and grated carrot doesn't go with everything

Acoshla

I ordered roast lamb, mash, veggies, etc in a pub in Galway a while ago, it came out with pesto all around the plate, sliding down into the gravy and veg, I was like wtf? Pesto with roast dinner? I sent it back because it was running down onto the meal and was disgusting, the waiter said the chef used it to garnish EVERY dish, neither of them could understand the concept that it didn't go with the dishes at all.

duploelabs

I'm a chef and have worked in several different styles of restaurants and one thing I cannot abide is where the sauce is smeared so thin on the plate that you cannot get a substantial amount to even taste it

MissFlitworth

+1 for pesto turning up on plates it has no business being on. Same thing with arty dribbles of balsamic vinegar on plates getting all over food it has no business being near. Drop the squirty bottles already!

duploelabs

MissFlitworth wrote: »

+1 for pesto turning up on plates it has no business being on. Same thing with arty dribbles of balsamic vinegar on plates getting all over food it has no business being near. Drop the squirty bottles already!

On that I cant believe chefs are still peddling balsamic reduction, let alone 90% of balsamic vinegar out there is white wine vinegar with caramel colouring despite being labeled Balsamic (next time you're in a shop check the label) and the proper stuff is about €30 minimum for a tiny bottle so if you're to reduce that to the consistency you want, you might as well dust your plates with saffron to really **** with your margins

Miaireland

I can't stand fruit puree all over desserts and some starters.

emeraldstar

neuro-praxis wrote: »

I like pesto, but not drizzled around my burger, steak or roast chicken. Why chefs are doing this is beyond me. I have taken to saying I am allergic to it.

Have to disagree with this one - pesto is really lovely on a burger along with some mozzarella cheese. Yum!


Raspberry coulis is mank though. I always have to scrape it off my dessert

Honey-ec

The flip-side of the "pesto with everything" coin is serving boiled veg as a side with absolutely every main course on a menu. I was once at a wedding where the vegetarian option was spring rolls. "Grand", says I, "I'll have that." Unfortunately, the two spring rolls arrived out on a plate with the same carrots, mash, broccoli and GRAVY as the chicken-or-beef. That chef should seriously have been tied down and burnt in the extremities with his own butane torch.

The Hill Billy

Sorry Honey-ec, but I LOL'ed.

actuallylike

I ordered Mussells in a well to do restaurant a while ago. Was quite surprised when a metal bucket, filled to the top with ice and 4, yes four measly mussels on top. Needless to say I was finished in the time it's taken to read this and yes, I found myself eating the ice

Honey-ec

Hill Billy wrote: »

Sorry Honey-ec, but I LOL'ed.

So did I, before sending it back and asking for a plate of brown bread instead...

nosietoes

I wish the green stuff even was pesto: it is far worse... the dreaded rocket oil made by blitzing up stalks of rocket with oil... and nothing else. It is disgusting, and a horrible kickback to times past. yuech.

Acoshla

Oh yeah and raspberry feckin coulis, with every dessert, things it was never meant to go with, big blobs or lines of the stuff everywhere! When it actually goes with a dessert it's lovely but I don't want raspberry coulis dripping from a Bailey's cheesecake.

the beer revolu

Came across the work of a seriously inept chef in The Rochestown Park Hotel, Cork today.
I ordered a steak sandwich, rare (when I enquired if the burgers were cooked to order, I was told they weren't).
It came well done.
I sent it back and it came out medium.

Either this 'professional' doesn't know what a rare steak is or was unable to cook one, given two goes at it. Unbelievable.

And the oil in which the chips were cooked was past its best!

Total crap

Eviledna

I was in Jalapenos in Quay St Galway on Sunday afternoon. Now I had previously raved about this place but my oh my has it gone downhill.

I was in at about 3pm and ordered their "american breakfast pancakes with fruit".
Envisioned fluffly large buttermilk disks with a sizeable bowl of fruit.

Received three jar-top sized flat burnt salty discs with a tiny serving bowl of tinned fruit salad, which was fizzy. Yes, fizzy. They must have put sherbet or bicarb in the mix to keep it fresh? So less than impressed I asked the waitress for some maple syrup (to try and salvage my lunch).

She replied "The head chef is going to charge you for that, it's extra".

Said ok, rolled eyes at my sis who ordered the same and was similarly dissapointed. Got tiny bowl of maple syrup to share with my sis. Would have sent it back only I knew I'd get sneezers in return. Told them when I was paying that the pancakes were salty, so they benevolently didn't charge me for the syrup.

Won't be returning for salty fizzy burnt pancakes again. Head chef indeed!:rolleyes:

Honey-ec

the beer revolu wrote: »

Either this 'professional' doesn't know what a rare steak is or was unable to cook one, given two goes at it. Unbelievable.

Irish chefs in general are terrible at cooking steak. It's almost inevitably 2-3 stages past what you've asked for. I've bemoaned this here before, and have christened it "Irish rare", which is, in reality, medium.

When I used to eat my steak rare, I ordered it blue in restaurants, and still had to send it back in maybe 8 out of 10 cases. Now that I eat it blue, I just don't order steak in restaurants anymore; it's a complete waste of time.

pickarooney

I think you need to order the steak, then cancel the order the moment the waiter comes back out of the kitchen area, then ask for the cancelled steak.