Breast is best - just not in public.....

SanFran07

http://www.herald.ie/opinion/columnists/marisa-mackle/marisa-mackle-breast-is-best-when-its-not-in-public-2508344.html

Quality

Marisa Mackle.... writer of the chiclit books MR RIGHT FOR THE NIGHT and SO LONG, MR WRONG.

Maybe she should stick to what she knows best and keep her breastfeeding opinions to herself.

It is not against the law. Ladies should feel free to get their boobs out and do what nature intended.

SanFran07

http://www.bebo.com/c/photos/view?MemberId=5001927074&PhotoNbr=1&PhotoAlbumId=7367607314



Pot.....kettle.....

merryhappy

One of my friends sent me this week during the week: http://www.tv3.ie/xpose.php?video=31421&locID=1.65.68

Listen carefully at the end.

implausible

This type of tripe coming from a woman who has actually breastfed gives licence to others to go on similar rants.

She would never breastfeed in public? Then, she obviously didn't do it for very long or never left the house. I wonder would she be happier if her 'friend' had to go and feed her baby in a toilet.

This kind of negative press really puts women off choosing breastfeeding and makes it really difficult for those who do.

up for anything

I'm speechless. :mad::mad:

Das Kitty

Can we refrain from name-calling and talk of violence please?

I breastfed in public, with a shawl usually or if I was out with my ladies-with-babies group I didn't bother. It can be difficult at times to get the latch correct if you can't see what you're doing.

IMO anything that works toward normalising breastfeeding can only be a good thing. People were only uncomfortable in her story there because it's not seen too often. Her article is stupid and detrimental to it becoming an everyday sight IMO. She's going to come in for a lot of flac about it I'm sure.

One funny thing about it is that she says about uploading breastfeeding pictures to facebook, facebook routinely remove photos of breastfeeding citing them as nudity, however many other photos of breasts unsuckled are left there.

lynski

Seriously, this is an easy one, but is there a better way for a 'chick lit' 'author' to drum up some 'profile' then attacking breastfeeding? Every media outlet knows it is a hot button topic and they will cover this to make money - 30c per text and 1530 numbers to call in. Win-win; they get listeners and money and airtime filled cheaply, she gets publicity and the losers - babies because mothers already faltering will take to their 'discreet' homes or give up.
She has a book coming out, on Tuesday! a Childrens book too. just boycott her book, this is an opening salvo in a media campaign to get her on the airwaves/newspaper pages/etc for the next few weeks.
Do not give her the oxygen. She is a cynical exploiter of women, and I hope her friend is thrilled to see her lunch discussed in this way, if this actually happened at all.

Cat Melodeon

But as far as I'm concerned, women should not breastfeed in public because it makes others feel ill at ease.

I know people who feel ill at ease when they see an affectionate homosexual couple.
I know people who feel ill at ease when they meet someone with special needs.
I know people who feel ill at ease when they are around people not of their race.
I know people who feel ill at ease when they have to watch other people eat.
Hell, I know people who feel ill at ease around other people.

D'ye know what? We should ban people.

Squiggler

Her attitude and article are so irritating, particularly in view of her own publicised nudity.

But she, and others like her, do not have a leg to stand on.

From here http://www.breastfeeding.ie/breastfeeding_out_and_about

What are your rights?

If you are happy to breastfeed in a public area the owner, manager or staff of these premises (on their own behalf or on behalf of another customer) are not allowed to ask you to use separate facilities, or ask you to leave.

If you inform management and staff that you are being harassed by other customers for breastfeeding in public, they have a duty to protect you from this.

There are two pieces of legislation that protect breastfeeding mothers from discrimination* or harassment** while breastfeeding, The Equal Status Act (2000) and The Intoxicating Liquor Act (2003)

The Equal Status Act (2000) protects people from discrimination and harassment (including sexual harassment) in the use of and access to a wide range of services including shops and restaurants. Protection for mums breastfeeding in public is provided under two of the nine discriminatory grounds covered by the Act, Gender and Family Status. This Act helps mums to breastfeed comfortably in public places by protecting them from being discriminated against or harassed because they are breastfeeding.

The Intoxicating Liquor Act (2003) - Section 19 Protects against discrimination occurring in a public house and provides access to the District Court for redress.

*Discrimination is less favourable treatment, for example, asking someone to leave a premises because they are breastfeeding.

**Harassment is unwanted conduct (of a sexual nature in the case of sexual harassment) related to any of the discriminatory grounds covered by the Equal Status Act which has the purpose or effect of violating a person's dignity and creating an intimidating, hostile, degrading, humiliating or offensive environment for the person, in this case a breastfeeding mother.

Cat Melodeon

SanFran07 wrote: »

http://www.bebo.com/c/photos/view?MemberId=5001927074&PhotoNbr=1&PhotoAlbumId=7367607314

That image DEFINITELY makes me feel ill at ease.

Have to say I had never heard of this woman before today. Hopefully I never will again.

stovelid

Would have thought she'd be a big fan of tits in the public eye seeing as she's one herself.

Bizarre to imagine how breastfeedling could offend anybody, especially a woman.

aniascor

It's likely she feels uncomfortable because she's not used to seeing it. But it's her problem - not the problem of the women who just want to feed their babies. When Playboy and its ilk hit the shelves in Ireland I remember hearing people on the radio saying they couldn't walk into their local shop, they were so embarrassed by what they were faced with on the magazine covers. Never hear that anymore.

If more women were encouraged to breastfeed in public, the sight would become so commonplace that you wouldn't think twice about it, and the sense of awkwardness that people feel when faced unexpectedly with public breastfeeding would fade.

I was horrified at the idea of breastfeeding in public when I started feeding my son first. It took months for me to become at ease with the idea, but that was mostly because I felt I would be doing something strange if I fed my son in a public place, because I never really saw it being done by anyone else.

bulmersgal

only time i've ever noticed a baby been breastfeed in public was once by a woman on the quays who sat down at side of road and fed baby in front of every1, other time was woman across from me in plane. I'm sure i've prob been in the presence of babies been breastfed but never noticed because the mothers where discreet. I think most woman are quite discreet when feeding babies, so what is people problems. Sure they'd give out more if they had to listen to hungry baby crying.

P.s i think every mother is afraid of feeding out doors, I bottled fed but i was terrified my baby would puke.

wolfpawnat

To the writer of that article I have to say tough tít!!!!!

Just because an adult feels uncomfortable a child should go without food, that's what I get from this article. And if one of your friends is a new mother, there are very few people can look after the child. And even harder again with a breastfeeding child.

Wantobe

I thought the photo of Miranda Kerr ( that she refers to in her article) was beautiful and tasteful.

http://www.heraldsun.com.au/news/breaking-news/miranda-kerr-and-orlando-bloom-share-first-shot-of-son-flynn-bloom/story-e6frf7jx-1225991041598

Ayla

Honestly, for the love of it, I just can't figure out why this feeding issue keeps arising. Some folks do it, some don't, some have "problems" with it, some don't.

Why can't everyone just get over it? It's a boob, folks. A flabby bit of flesh, really, if we're being honest. Page 3 is plastered with them everyday. Why is it suddenly "uncomfortable," "disrespectful" or "gross" to actually use them for what they're designed for? Why should anyone feel it necessary to segregate nursing mothers, and why should women feel the pressure to hide themselves. It's a BOOB!

On the other hand, though, this sudden spurt of celebrity feeding seems almost like a publicity stunt - like it's a fashionable thing now to be using one's breasts to feed their baby. Maybe that somehow helps the "common" woman to feel like it's ok, but I just keep thinking - why is everyone making such a big deal over it? Babe's hungry, feed him/her. Done. You won't be seeing any celebrities posting snapshots of nappy changes or spitting up, so why does feeding pose any greater interest to the general public?

I breastfed my 2 girls for 7-9 months, anywhere we were. Restaurants, library, internet cafe. Always done quietly and discreetly and I never once saw a single glance from anyone in the area. No blankets to hide myself under, just lifted the shirt, did the deed & burped. Done. Most of the time even people I'd be talking with wouldn't even know what was happening.

I wish everyone would just get over it already!

Khannie

stovelid wrote: »

Would have thought she'd be a big fan of tits in the public eye seeing as she's one herself.

HAHAHAHA. I lol'd.

I genuinely believe that these people say ridiculous things to get a rise / get a discussion like this one going. Others have said it better than I could. I just don't get the hang up with breasts. Don't get me wrong...I think breasts are brilliant. I just couldn't give a fiddlers if someone is using them for feeding. What do people think happened before formula was invented?

Davidth88

I by and large don't have an issue with this at all.

However , Ill tell you a small story.

I was having coffee with my wife, her friend and our little one who at the time was about 2 in a coffee shop in England. Now I was ' fielding ' little one , who at that age of course is running about the place as they do. I had to follow her to make sure she didn't get up to anything.

Anyway , in the corner is a group of about 6-7 mums with babes in arms , obviously some sort of group. All of them ( it seemed ) breast feeding.

of course my little one KEPT running into that area , Ill be honest , I did feel somewhat awkward. I am sure the Mums didn't care , but I felt I was intruding and didn't want them thinking I was perving .

My wife and her friend thought it was hilarious of course.


Now getting back to the OP, that is pure self serving nonsense .

irishgrover

it's quite sad that she has such an irrational hang up - reflects purely on herself, as opposed to her friends or society...

It's quite pathetic that that this irrational stupidity is worthy of a newspaper column.

Basically it's a poorly written article, with no substance or thought. It might have been slightly more interesting if she examined why she has such a stupid hangup etc, however she just went for the lazy option. To be honest it is so poorly and lazily through out, written and communicated that it barely deserves any discussion...(IMHO)

Kildrought

Playboy and its ilk ..... embarrassed by what they were faced with on the magazine covers.

I find them embarrassing/ annoying / demeaning when I see them on shelves.

What's hilarious about this whole debate is that anyone who objects to pornography (and the social damage it causes) being sold alongside the milk and bread is 'old-fashioned' or a 'fuddy-duddy' but write an article about babies being fed and its all over the news as the most important issue of the day.

Nasty_Girl

Ayla wrote: »

Why can't everyone just get over it? It's a boob, folks. A flabby bit of flesh, really, if we're being honest. Page 3 is plastered with them everyday. Why is it suddenly "uncomfortable," "disrespectful" or "gross" to actually use them for what they're designed for? Why should anyone feel it necessary to segregate nursing mothers, and why should women feel the pressure to hide themselves. It's a BOOB!

And as soon as there's even a glimmer of sunlight we end up with a bunch of lads showing off their gross boobs in public without a bother.

I am sick though, of mothers criticizing other mothers constantly, for working, not working, breastfeeding or not breastfeeding. Everyone is different, just because something works for one parent it doesn't for another.

hamlet1

Am with Marisa Mackle on this one!She is right,its revolting watching breastfeeding in public.It's so overrated anyway.Babies do just as well on formula and you get a break from all that feeding!

Cat Melodeon

hamlet1 wrote: »

Am with Marisa Mackle on this one!She is right,its revolting watching breastfeeding in public.

Then don't watch. Do you find it revolting to watch other people eat too, or just babies? You might want some therapy for that.

hamlet1 wrote: »

It's so overrated anyway.Babies do just as well on formula

Heaps of scientific research showing your 'opinion' is wrong.

hamlet1 wrote: »

and you get a break from all that feeding!

Most breastfeeding mums get more sleep and rest that formula feeding ones. Personally I couldn't be bothered with all that bottle washing and sterilising and waiting for kettles to boil. I'd have him fed by the time all that was done.

lynski

hamlet1 wrote: »

Am with Marisa Mackle on this one!She is right,its revolting watching breastfeeding in public.It's so overrated anyway.Babies do just as well on formula and you get a break from all that feeding!

Are you twelve? because only a child would put forward such a view.
Breastfeeding looks like cuddling in public most of the time, the very rare occasion is doesn't i seriously doubt most people would even notice.
There is NO, NONE, NOT EVEN a single study anywhere in the known scientific world that says babies who are formula fed are as well fed as breastfed babies, if there is find it and make sure the writers are not formula company employees too.
Formula feeding is overrated, at every stage, on every point.
Breast feeding is so much easier and if you wanted a break from all the pesky infant feeding dont bother having an infant, problem solved.

MaryFMOR

Why oh why do we find it so awkward to breast feed our babies in public?

My baby is 7 months old and am still breast feeding and I can count on one hand the amount of times in the 7 months I fed him in public.

Even with my baby bubu breast feeding shawl I still felt awkward.

This really needs to change :mad:

up for anything

MaryFMOR wrote: »

Why oh why do we find it so awkward to breast feed our babies in public?

My baby is 7 months old and am still breast feeding and I can count on one hand the amount of times in the 7 months I fed him in public.

Even with my baby bubu breast feeding shawl I still felt awkward.

This really needs to change :mad:

You are the only person that can change this. Just decide to stop feeling awkward. I see far more women breastfeeding in public than when I used to and they don't seem to worry about discretion and breastfeeding tops/shawls etc. If someone's sensibilities are offended by you feeding your baby - tough!

Cat Melodeon

up for anything wrote: »

You are the only person that can change this. Just decide to stop feeling awkward. I see far more women breastfeeding in public than when I used to and they don't seem to worry about discretion and breastfeeding tops/shawls etc. If someone's sensibilities are offended by you feeding your baby - tough!

It is easier said than done though. I know some of the few times I did it I was so hung up that I couldn't actually feed my baby, couldn't get let-down to happen. If you have never breastfed a baby, this feels a bit like getting 'stage fright' when you have to pee and can't because someone is in the next cubicle. Similar thing, the milk is there but it won't come out.

People can help though. Organisations like Friends of Breastfeeding are trying to get public places to sign up as a 'friend' and display a membership sticker so that breastfeeding parents know that the staff are aware of the difficulties and will act accordingly should anyone make a negative comment, and so that other non-breastfeeding people start to see that it is a perfectly normal thing to do.

Elle Collins

irishgrover wrote: »

Basically it's a poorly written article, with no substance or thought.... To be honest it is so poorly and lazily through out, written and communicated that it barely deserves any discussion...(IMHO)

That's the case with her writing generally.

MintyDoris

Ayla wrote: »

Honestly, for the love of it, I just can't figure out why this feeding issue keeps arising. Some folks do it, some don't, some have "problems" with it, some don't.

Why can't everyone just get over it? It's a boob, folks. A flabby bit of flesh, really, if we're being honest. Page 3 is plastered with them everyday. Why is it suddenly "uncomfortable," "disrespectful" or "gross" to actually use them for what they're designed for? Why should anyone feel it necessary to segregate nursing mothers, and why should women feel the pressure to hide themselves. It's a BOOB!

On the other hand, though, this sudden spurt of celebrity feeding seems almost like a publicity stunt - like it's a fashionable thing now to be using one's breasts to feed their baby. Maybe that somehow helps the "common" woman to feel like it's ok, but I just keep thinking - why is everyone making such a big deal over it? Babe's hungry, feed him/her. Done. You won't be seeing any celebrities posting snapshots of nappy changes or spitting up, so why does feeding pose any greater interest to the general public?

I wish everyone would just get over it already!

I logged on just to thank this post!

My partner and I had a huge, week long discussion over this article, which I will admit got fairly heated. I am not yet a mother myself but was absolutely disgusted by the article and its 'author'.

I am still so annoyed that I can't find the words to make my feelings clear

up for anything

Cat Melodeon wrote: »

It is easier said than done though. I know some of the few times I did it I was so hung up that I couldn't actually feed my baby, couldn't get let-down to happen.

Nothing worthwhile is ever easy and it really is up to you to change how you feel.

I spent a straight seven years breastfeeding (if I had it to do again I'd probably give myself a bit of a break ) three kids, at one stage two of them in tandem, and never gave a thought to other peoples' reactions and never once had an adverse comment from a stranger or the 'general public' and by the time a couple of years had passed I had completely ditched discretion. If a baby needs feeding, it needs feeding. I did try to draw the line at the toddler feeding at the same time as the baby in public but sometimes I had to allow it.

It would be pretty rude of me if every time a mother took out a bottle to feed her baby that I tut tutted and made comments which would make her feel uncomfortable or asked her to take that abomination out of my sight.

People make too much of it.