Haven't touched a drop in...

Kunkka

Yeah the drink dreams still happen the odd time to me today. They aren't fun at all

Bonniedog

Kunkka wrote: »

Yeah the drink dreams still happen the odd time to me today. They aren't fun at all

The scary thing was that it was as though I had convinced myself when asleep that I was back drinking and it took me that few minutes to realize that I was not back into old mode of heading down stairs in the dark on a Saturday morning to have a vodka.

Canadel

Bonniedog wrote: »

Had very strange night on Friday. I woke up after a very vivid dream convinced that I had to have a drink. Dream seemed to have been very realistic, nothing dramatic, but I was drinking in it, and seemed to have decided that it was the best thing to do.

My drink dreams comprise of me waking up with the feeling of the fear which consistently and doggedly destroyed my mental well being when I used to drink. Indeed the last time I drank I woke the next day dreaming about the events of the night before, thinking it must have been a dream, hoping that it was. Despairingly. I asked the nurse beside me if the events of the night before had really happened, and then I realised I was speaking to a nurse. My heart sank and all hope faded. It was far from the worst experience of the fear I ever had, but it was one of the scariest, and luckily for me, the last since then. Anyway, these dreams of the fear almost make me feel the need to ask the people I live with if I was drinking the night before, even though I know I haven't drank in nearly two years. Fascinating. The power of paranoia.

Sunnyisland

Haven't had a drink dream in a very long time, but I did at the start have dreams where I was drinking only to wake up and breathe a sence of relief that I wasent drinking at all, so real so frightening.

petes

Two weeks now and all the better for it, the four months sober I had is not lost as I can learn from it. No matter what is going on in my head it's so much better with a clear head. When I drink I spiral out of control. Instead of looking back on what happens when I drink I'm going to look forward to what would happen if I drank. No compulsions or thoughts or anything but I didn't last time either and I drank. Madness Anyway, one day at a time. Meetings and counseling are especially important, for anyone that thinks meetings aren't for them that's okay but it is a place where you will get understanding and hope so you do have somewhere to go. Bit positive on a Saturday morning but no work and a day on the ps4. Hope everyone is well

Sunnyisland

Your sounding good and positive peters, fair play to ta ya .

petes

realies wrote: »

Your sounding good and positive peters, fair play to ta ya .

I am to be honest, I beat myself up enough for relapsing but there's no point. Need to keep positive and just take it a day at a time

marienbad

Another year gone .How time flies by . And all because I had enough and walked through that door .

tinpib

petes wrote: »

I am to be honest, I beat myself up enough for relapsing but there's no point. Need to keep positive and just take it a day at a time

Hi Petes, great to hear that and yes you do sound positive and that 4 months will be great experience to call on.

I'm still off it in 2016 but have been tempted these past couple of weekends as my laptop packed in and boredom raised its head.

One time I was sitting in a bar area doing the will I /won't I for about 15 minutes.

What finally pushed me towards staying sober was I didn't want to jepardise the amazing sleeps I have had from roundabout Jan 10th/12th until now. I love it, the consistency of going out like a light round the same time each night and waking up feeling refreshed each day.

Even if I 'only had a few' I fear that it could throw me out whack and I could end up wasting the guts of a week.

My productivity has gone through the roof and I want to keep it that way.

enoughalready

tinpib wrote: »

Hi Petes, great to hear that and yes you do sound positive and that 4 months will be great experience to call on.

I'm still off it in 2016 but have been tempted these past couple of weekends as my laptop packed in and boredom raised its head.

One time I was sitting in a bar area doing the will I /won't I for about 15 minutes.

What finally pushed me towards staying sober was I didn't want to jepardise the amazing sleeps I have had from roundabout Jan 10th/12th until now. I love it, the consistency of going out like a light round the same time each night and waking up feeling refreshed each day.

Even if I 'only had a few' I fear that it could throw me out whack and I could end up wasting the guts of a week.

My productivity has gone through the roof and I want to keep it that way.

I can definitely identify with you tinpib regarding the level of productivity that you now acquire since ditching the demon drink! I feel I have 100% more energy and have been really productive in all aspects of my life, and everyone notices the difference which just affirms I'm making the correct choices for me. Best of luck on your continued path

Exactly right, enoughalready, regarding productivity levels. I'm ridiculously productive now compared to what I was when drink had me. The energy levels are invigorating now.

So, so sad to see Realies has closed his account. He had a great, respectful posting manner across this website. In particular, he was always a great support on this forum and I often at times of struggle in the past two years plus just logged in to get heart from his words of wisdom/perspective and never bothered posting. I sincerely hope everything works out well for him.

Vincit qui se vincit (he who conquers himself conquers all)

Kunkka

Deleted User wrote: »

So, so sad to see Realies has closed his account. He had a great, respectful posting manner across this website. In particular, he was always a great support on this forum and I often at times of struggle in the past two years plus just logged in to get heart from his words of wisdom/perspective and never bothered posting. I sincerely hope everything works out well for him.

Really sorry to hear that. He's been a real inspiration to me on this forum as he was always positive! Hopefully he'll be back at some stage as I done the same years ago.

marienbad

Deleted User wrote: »

Exactly right, enoughalready, regarding productivity levels. I'm ridiculously productive now compared to what I was when drink had me. The energy levels are invigorating now.

So, so sad to see Realies has closed his account. He had a great, respectful posting manner across this website. In particular, he was always a great support on this forum and I often at times of struggle in the past two years plus just logged in to get heart from his words of wisdom/perspective and never bothered posting. I sincerely hope everything works out well for him.

Vincit qui se vincit (he who conquers himself conquers all)

I had'nt realized Realies had closed his account as I have been on the go and just dipping in an and out , great contributor and will be sorely missed.

And just in case Realies is keeping an eye on us here let me say , come back ,all is forgiven and we Realies need you

The flying mouse

marienbad wrote: »

I had'nt realized Realies had closed his account as I have been on the go and just dipping in an and out , great contributor and will be sorely missed.

And just in case Realies is keeping an eye on us here let me say , come back ,all is forgiven and we Realies need you

I is here :-) thanks all for them lovely kind words, just thought a change was as good as a rest so I am back now as a mouse :-) a still alcohol free mouse i might add.

enoughalready

The flying mouse wrote: »

I is here :-) thanks all for them lovely kind words, just thought a change was as good as a rest so I am back now as a mouse :-) a still alcohol free mouse i might add.

Brilliant - I love it! lol

Irish_rat

5 months off the most widely used drug in the country. It sure does feel good. But I can't let it slip. Stag party coming up next month so that will be a big hurdle.

Amazingfun

Irish_rat wrote: »

5 months off the most widely used drug in the country. It sure does feel good. But I can't let it slip. Stag party coming up next month so that will be a big hurdle.

Good stuff rat. It's funny tho, I never think of alcohol as a "drug". It has calories, is a carbohydrate, really it's a kind of FOOD! Alcoholism can actually be thought of as a food allergy in certain respects, but with very severe consequences.

I used to hear speakers say stuff like " some people are allergic to strawberries, they break out in hives when they eat them. I am allergic to alcohol, I break out in handcuffs when I drink" :pac:

Irish_rat

Whoops its actually only 4 months off it! :-P

I was never good at maths :-)

The flying mouse

5 months ,4 months 4 weeks well done Irishrat, your doing great, one day at atime.

GerB40

22 months today. Holy fùck, i'm in disbelief. After years of being a slob I started a plc course and for the first time in around 10 years I got real life stressed. In the last month or so I've had drink on my mind more than I had since I stopped. Still never gave in though 😆😆. I don't say this to brag but a few people here know how bad I was so hopefully my exploits prove that it can be done. Best wishes to all here, you're in good company....

The flying mouse

GerB40 wrote: »

22 months today. Holy fùck, i'm in disbelief. After years of being a slob I started a plc course and for the first time in around 10 years I got real life stressed. In the last month or so I've had drink on my mind more than I had since I stopped. Still never gave in though 😆😆. I don't say this to brag but a few people here know how bad I was so hopefully my exploits prove that it can be done. Best wishes to all here, you're in good company....

Fair play to you ger delighted for you...

Kunkka

Well done Ger, getting over the hard times define our sobriety & make us stronger.

The flying mouse

It's very quite around these parts, hope everyone is good, I was talking to a friend of mine during week and he clean for 9 months but last weekend he slipped up and had a few, He said he could feel it coming, the little voices in his mind telling him he could control it, sure just a few is ok,it can't do me any harm etc etc, needless to say he messed up, but he back on track on now and hopefully he has learned from it.

For me, what worked for me, was the acceptance that I cannot drink, that's it, I cannot drink or take any mind altering substances, I admitted the defeat to that battle with alcohol, yes it won that battle but I folks is winning the war .dont quit quitting.

Canadel

The flying mouse wrote: »

It's very quite around these parts, hope everyone is good, I was talking to a friend of mine during week and he clean for 9 months but last weekend he slipped up and had a few, He said he could feel it coming, the little voices in his mind telling him he could control it, sure just a few is ok,it can't do me any harm etc etc, needless to say he messed up, but he back on track on now and hopefully he has learned from it.

For me, what worked for me, was the acceptance that I cannot drink, that's it, I cannot drink or take any mind altering substances, I admitted the defeat to that battle with alcohol, yes it won that battle but I folks is winning the war .dont quit quitting.

The Voice of Ireland.

tinpib

The last two weeks have been fine, not tempted at all.

I'm in a great routine and it is also a very rigid routine. Self-imposed mind you, but I'm enjoying the rigidity and productivity and of course loving the sleeps and waking up in fantastic form every morning.

My mood can drop a bit during the day but still overall it's great.

Irish_rat

Yeah it's been great, have signed the contracts for my new house so it's a good start to the month. Only a small matter of building the thing!

Have a appointment to tackle skin problems this week I have so I'm facing a problem which I probably wouldn't drinking alcohol. It also helps knowing your body and liver is in good condition to help the recovery.

Apart from that I need to resume running again! Also I have two weekends at the end of this month where I'll be away (the stag and birthday) and that'll be the real test. Keep it up folks :-)

The flying mouse

Try and remember that you have over 60,000 thoughts a day, these thoughts come and go endlessly without bothering you .....

EXCEPT the thoughts that obsess you. These thoughts

"I want a drink"
"I need a drink"
"I am going to fail"
"I can't do this"

Only keep returning BECAUSE you believe them and want them to stop. It is the 'try NOT thinking of a pink elephant' dilemma.
You are now sober, it is NOT the chemical lure of the drug but the MENTAL mouse wheel that has you.

The thought cannot get you, let it come in, go out, come in again. Know it has no power, none. Unless you connect it to "I will go buy and drink alcohol now" it is simply a thought, one of the 60,000 you have every day.

Our very existence is ONLY thoughts, everyone creates their own reality with thought. Your happiness comes from inside NOT outside you. It is not IN the drink, it never was, you simply THOUGHT it was......but it was always coming from inside you.

I can prove this for you.

Did you ever drink and feel happy and have a great time, laugh, dance and end the night feeling fantastic?
Did you ever have a terrible evening drinking, then arguing and crying?

The alcohol was the same, yet your experience was completely opposite.......this is because everything you felt came from INSIDE you, always did, always will.

enoughalready

4 months alcohol free...everything is so much better in my life without the demon drink! Worked through a lot of my issues with a counselor and I understand myself much better now. Best of luck everyone x

thornywireman

Today is my 293rd day of no alcohol. I'm 33 next month and had drank since I was 17. Over the years my drinking became progressively worse due to lack of self confidence. I hit rock bottom after a friends wedding in May last year. A rough three months followed, but with a strong family behind me all the way and hours of counselling I have turned my life around. I am the happiest I have been in years. Waking up with a clear head every day and motivated to be the best version of myself every day. A strong will can go a long way, I'm also starting to believe in myself more.

I've been reading this thread all the way through and have taking some good advice from here. Its good to know there's great people out there full of courage and bravery.

Keep fighting the fight

getzls

Don't feel too bad anyone if you 'fall'
Just look at the way you were at your worst and think no I don't want to go back to that.

Nearly everyone falls and for me many times.
Now I get up in the morning and think it's good to be alive.