Haven't touched a drop in...

marienbad

ASoberThought wrote: »

How's everyone doing? Its quiet around here..

I'm doing good. Looking forward to starting a new job on Monday and making my recovery work while enduring a little extra pressure.

Congratulation on the new job , it will be a great way to keep the mind occupied .

marienbad

clairewithani wrote: »

That's great about the new job. Good luck.
Day 7 for me. Feeling very down and out but I suppose that goes with the territory.

Think positive , be positive , I know it sounds stupid but it does actually help .

What was it St . Augustine said to the unbelievers ''act as if you have faith and it will be given to you ''

It is exactly the same with an upbeat outlook - act and think as if you have and soon you will

Or else as Monty Python said 'Always look on the bright side '

tinpib

I've never really used Reddit that much but this stopdrinking subreddit is worth checking out.

https://www.reddit.com/r/stopdrinking/

clairewithani

Day 8 over. I was feeling very down and tired and and headachey mentioned it to the doctor. Turns out I am sick with throat infection. My doctor reckons some alcoholics stop listening to their bodies and often don't recognise symptoms as they are.
Antibiotics for a week so that will make it easier to abstain for next 7 days. That will make it 14 days. It is 8 years since I managed more than a week.
Strange times but very determined.

The flying mouse

Folks, well done to all who are continuing in the fight to get there life's back on track, and to us who seem to be doing and managing ok, But one of the keys in this is to never give in, most of is are here because we have some sort of problem with alcohol not because we are social/moderate drinkers, that is gone past us now.

we lost that battle but we haven't lost the war :-) You can all beat this, thousands do every year, Plan for the boring times, plan for the weakest times, plan for the unhappy times, Your life wont suddenly get all great financially, romantically, healthy and people wont love you any more, but you will be able to deal with the roller-coaster of life in a clear and managed way.

Don't quit quitting.

ASoberThought

Thanks for the good wishes guys.

Day 28 today for me.

I hope you're all doing well and enjoying the sun shine today.

ASoberThought

The flying mouse wrote: »

Folks, well done to all who are continuing in the fight to get there life's back on track, and to us who seem to be doing and managing ok, But one of the keys in this is to never give in, most of is are here because we have some sort of problem with alcohol not because we are social/moderate drinkers, that is gone past us now.

we lost that battle but we haven't lost the war :-) You can all beat this, thousands do every year, Plan for the boring times, plan for the weakest times, plan for the unhappy times, Your life wont suddenly get all great financially, romantically, healthy and people wont love you any more, but you will be able to deal with the roller-coaster of life in a clear and managed way.

Don't quit quitting.

Great post.

clairewithani

ASoberThought wrote: »

Thanks for the good wishes guys.

Day 28 today for me.

I hope you're all doing well and enjoying the sun shine today.

Day 9 for me.
Good luck with the new job tomorrow.
Excited?

ASoberThought

clairewithani wrote: »

Day 9 for me.
Good luck with the new job tomorrow.
Excited?

Well done. Are you feeling better than day 7?

I'm quite excited to be working in Dublin again. It's been 4 years since I've worked here.

clairewithani

ASoberThought wrote: »

Well done. Are you feeling better than day 7?

I'm quite excited to be working in Dublin again. It's been 4 years since I've worked here.

Still tired but Dr thinks it's infection has me tired. See how I am feeling next week when off the medication.

I loved Dublin myself when I was there. Few years ago now. Hope tomorrow goes well. Let us all know.

souls

souls wrote: »

Wishing everybody a happy sober christmas and peaceful new year!:D
Packing in the meetings and staying safe is the name of the game for my first sober christmas one day at a time, please god!

I hope you're OK, souls. I haven't seen a post here from you since this.

Laeot

75 days ....

Physically I'm 100000 healthier ...
Mentally I'm not .
I'm working on some issues for the long term good.

Keep well all.

clairewithani

Day 11. Tired beyond expectations. No energy at all.
Terrible craving for drink today. Bought a 99 instead.

lawlolawl

6 weeks and it was an unexpectedly tough one today. My social media feeds being full of my friends either in the beer garden for the evening or out on the patio having a few cans/glasses of wine really put booze to the forefront of my mind again. Was going to risk a 'handy' couple of bottles of some nice craft beer or something but that would just have been the beginning of it.

I just went to the shop and got ice cream instead in the end

marienbad

Claire & Lawlolawl - hang in there , unfortunately there will be more days like this but ye keep doing what ye are doing and they will occur less and less .

And remember any day without drink is a good day - we are all with ye .

clairewithani

marienbad wrote: »

Claire & Lawlolawl - hang in there , unfortunately there will be more days like this but ye keep doing what ye are doing and they will occur less and less .

And remember any day without drink is a good day - we are all with ye .

Thanks, but nice as you are I am not sharing my ice-cream with you.☺

marienbad

clairewithani wrote: »

Thanks, but nice as you are I am not sharing my ice-cream with you.☺

and you are not getting my last Rollo

leinsterdude

lawlolawl wrote: »

6 weeks and it was an unexpectedly tough one today. My social media feeds being full of my friends either in the beer garden for the evening or out on the patio having a few cans/glasses of wine really put booze to the forefront of my mind again. Was going to risk a 'handy' couple of bottles of some nice craft beer or something but that would just have been the beginning of it.

I just went to the shop and got ice cream instead in the end

Well done, Im a great man for just a few beers, sure I will be fine the next day, and even though I may only have 4-5 beers, I am not fine the next day, really cloudy, and not up for much work, even just a few, but too often is dangerous, Im not off it, but I am restricting myself much more, it becomes a habit, then a must do, scary really, it is just as easy to do what you did, I bet you enjoyed the ice cream just as much.

Bonniedog

tinpib wrote: »

I look at relapses as trial and error. Was there anything in particular that caused you to drink? Can you deal with the cause?

If it was a 'because it was Friday' then maybe you need to change up your Friday routine. Let's say your routine was wine/beers watching Friday evening telly then trying to watch telly sober will be difficult. Plan something else for next Friday. Even going to the cinema during peak temptation time will help. If you go to the cinema at 6pm, 7pm or 8pm or whatever by the time you get home it will be closer to bed time and hopefully it will be easier to go to bed sober.

Then you can look forward to a fresh head and a guilt, shame free Saturday.

Excellent advice. When I first tried to stop I tried to maintain my old routine of pub after work. Eventually there was a bad day and I just said "fk it, might as well be miserable drunk as sober" and that was that.

So next time I stopped I just gave up that part. Meant not seeing a lot of old friends but you realise then they are not really friends if you only see them in pub!

Two serious relapses since were at Dublin matches of all things! Decided that one or two pints wouldn't do me any harm and would be grand the next day. The next day I was drinking vodka at 7 in the morning and was like that for a week or so.

Have managed to get over that one by just going to matches and going home again. Fact that my daughter and her mates are going is a help as it is both an excuse for me to avoid drinking buddies and I would be ashamed to be drinking in front of her.

I was to go to Kilkenny at weekend where there were plans to stay over. I just don't trust myself to do that without drinking so I am not going. Part of me feels bad about missing it, but other part remembers feeling like sh1t and waiting for the off licence to open so that I can get a bottle of vodka.

Anyway, its on TV, and there will be no more away days!

But back to original point, yes it is important to change your routine if that routine continually puts you in the way of temptation. Find something else to do instead. And if you lose friends over not drinking, then they are not your friends, simple as that.

marienbad

Bonniedog wrote: »

Excellent advice. When I first tried to stop I tried to maintain my old routine of pub after work. Eventually there was a bad day and I just said "fk it, might as well be miserable drunk as sober" and that was that.

So next time I stopped I just gave up that part. Meant not seeing a lot of old friends but you realise then they are not really friends if you only see them in pub!

Two serious relapses since were at Dublin matches of all things! Decided that one or two pints wouldn't do me any harm and would be grand the next day. The next day I was drinking vodka at 7 in the morning and was like that for a week or so.

Have managed to get over that one by just going to matches and going home again. Fact that my daughter and her mates are going is a help as it is both an excuse for me to avoid drinking buddies and I would be ashamed to be drinking in front of her.

I was to go to Kilkenny at weekend where there were plans to stay over. I just don't trust myself to do that without drinking so I am not going. Part of me feels bad about missing it, but other part remembers feeling like sh1t and waiting for the off licence to open so that I can get a bottle of vodka.

Anyway, its on TV, and there will be no more away days!

But back to original point, yes it is important to change your routine if that routine continually puts you in the way of temptation. Find something else to do instead. And if you lose friends over not drinking, then they are not your friends, simple as that.

Really great post Bonniedog - this was my experience also - stopping off after work for a few drinks - everyone in the job did it .

And the thing was many a time I had vowed to give it up but come around 5 o'clock a mist seemed to cloud my brain and a frenetic drive to get that first drink would take over and before I knew I was already in the pub and my 2nd drink in front of me - the first having disappeared in seconds - and now that the damage was done - I would have all the time in the world to stare at the 2nd drink as I was overcome with shame and remorse at another day lost .

What is the phrase - one drink is too much and the whole bar is not enough.

And I agree if the only connection with people is the pub and drinks they are not really friends . I just gave up that scene entirely and fashioned a completely different life . The friends stayed in contact and the acquaintances dropped away- and good luck to them , they had their lives to live also untrammelled by my problems.

And you know you are getting better when you realise that a miserable day sober is light years ahead of a miserable day drinking

clairewithani

Strawberries and ice-cream tonight. Yum yum. Starting to notice the difference in my pocket now too ☺

Bonniedog

clairewithani wrote: »

Strawberries and ice-cream tonight. Yum yum. Starting to notice the difference in my pocket now too ☺

It is a good incentive. Can't believe how much I spent over the years, to my shame.

There are lots of better things you can be doing with your money, and usually it is a lot cheaper and you will have something tangible, spiritually or materially, instead of a sore head and feeling like cr@p!

Bonniedog

Bonniedog wrote: »

Excellent advice. When I first tried to stop I tried to maintain my old routine of pub after work....
So next time I stopped I just gave up that part.... But back to original point, yes it is important to change your routine if that routine continually puts you in the way of temptation. Find something else to do instead. And if you lose friends over not drinking, then they are not your friends, simple as that.

I completely agree that changing your routine/environment is essential. To be frank, I don't know how people can continue with their old routines and not cave in eventually.

It was essential that I change my environment to succeed. If, once in a while since giving up drink 29 months ago, I'm in a pub for a short period it's not much of an issue as I'm driving and I feel no pressure to drink. However, going out to my old haunts with my old "friends" would be madness. Not even a slippery slope: at the edge of a clear, unmistakable cliff. I've fought hard to get here, and I've won back trust. It is so easy to delude yourself when you want to go back drinking. All the little deceits that you can filter into your brain - "I'll just have one" blah blah. We lie to ourselves. The priority *must* be to protect our sobriety. Without that we are no use whatever to the people around us who love us and need our love and support.

More positively, I find it's surprisingly easy to keep off the drink if I keep well clear of pubs and other places dominated by alcohol. I've been busy as hell the past year with a full-time job, raising a very young family (e.g. awoken at 06:05am this morning!) and doing another postgrad. There is so much going on. Time is precious. Now that my exams are over that saying old people have of "idle hands are the devil's tools" really has meaning. I need to keep productive and I especially need to keep away from all these enticing pubs in this gorgeous weather. Free time and this weather are not a good combination.

Change your environment/routine and you've made the most important step in allowing you to change your life.

marienbad

Deleted User wrote: »

I completely agree that changing your routine/environment is essential. To be frank, I don't know how people can continue with their old routines and not cave in eventually.

It was essential that I change my environment to succeed. If, once in a while since giving up drink 29 months ago, I'm in a pub for a short period it's not much of an issue as I'm driving and I feel no pressure to drink. However, going out to my old haunts with my old "friends" would be madness. Not even a slippery slope: at the edge of a clear, unmistakable cliff. I've fought hard to get here, and I've won back trust. It is so easy to delude yourself when you want to go back drinking. All the little deceits that you can filter into your brain - "I'll just have one" blah blah. We lie to ourselves. The priority *must* be to protect our sobriety. Without that we are no use whatever to the people around us who love us and need our love and support.

More positively, I find it's surprisingly easy to keep off the drink if I keep well clear of pubs and other places dominated by alcohol. I've been busy as hell the past year with a full-time job, raising a very young family (e.g. awoken at 06:05am this morning!) and doing another postgrad. There is so much going on. Time is precious. Now that my exams are over that saying old people have of "idle hands are the devil's tools" really has meaning. I need to keep productive and I especially need to keep away from all these enticing pubs in this gorgeous weather. Free time and this weather are not a good combination.

Change your environment/routine and you've made the most important step in allowing you to change your life.

+100%. great post

Bonniedog

Its just something that's been on my mind this week as am missing going to Kilkenny for the match, and staying overnight. It would either mean me drinking, to be totally honest, or spending two days with people who are drinking and me not drinking. Would love to say I have the zen composure to do that. I don't!


It is hard to give up old habits like the after match/work/meeting pub, but it is sometimes necessary. I stuck the post work thing for a good while but hated it. And eventually you will have a bad day, or indeed a good day, and decide to have "one".

It is all part of it, and a lot of people fall, but I think we learn from our errors, and part of it is to recognise our weakness and not to poke the tiger!

lawlolawl

"Just one" is never just one.

Especially in Ireland.

petes

As marienbad used the phrase above ' one drink is too much and the whole bar is not enough'

Laeot

petes wrote: »

As marienbad used the phrase above ' one drink is too much and the whole bar is not enough'

For me it is none or 15 ...
True story unfortunately.

So I'll stick with none.

tinpib

petes wrote: »

As marienbad used the phrase above ' one drink is too much and the whole bar is not enough'

Was just browsing Netflix and there is a documentary "The resurrection of Jake the Snake" about the wrestler. About 30 mins in he paraphrases the above quote after going to his first AA meeting in a long time.

edit: That doc is definitely worth a look for anyone who knows Jake. It is pretty much all about his addiction and recovery over 18 months and not a biog doc on his life, so even non-wrestling fans on here would relate to it.

JupiterKid

Had another bad relapse. Basically a one week bender. Unable to sleep, blood pressure through the roof.

Sober today. Trying to get back on track. Feeling better today and went to my aftercare group and told them of my relapse. I really don't want this anymore - it's going to kill me if I can't remain sober. I hate this evil nasty addiction. It's soul destroying and saps me of my happiness.

I would not wish this addiction on my worst enemy. But I am grateful to be sober today and one day at a time.