Haven't touched a drop in...

The flying mouse

GerB40 wrote: »

I'll start by saying that I've no doubt in my mind that this very thread has saved my life. In the early days of sobriety I didn't know what was happening and the great folks here thought me that sobriety is possible if you have people (in real life or online) that you can talk to. It wasn't easy but 28 months later I still haven't had a drink so something must've worked.

The problem is, the initial post accute withdrawal symptoms were so severe I decided to take prescription medication (obviously not prescribed to me) and they worked a charm.

Two years later and I'm just as addicted to prescription medication as I ever was to drink.

Basically I was wondering if boards would be willing to create some sort of drug addiction forum. There's an epidemic out there that a lot of people are suffering from but the general public don't seem to know much about it.

I'm aware of the countless pitfalls such a forum will attract but with strict moderation it could be a great help to many folks out there..

Hi Ger have you tried going to CA meetings ,don't know where you are but there are numerous meetings round the country.

I go to them here in Portugal, There main topics is cocaine and everything else that comes with it ,I find them quite good.

GerB40

The flying mouse wrote: »

Hi Ger have you tried going to CA meetings ,don't know where you are but there are numerous meetings round the country.

I go to them here in Portugal, There main topics is cocaine and everything else that comes with it ,I find them quite good.

Cheers for that, I looked it up and there are CA meetings fairly close to me. Would I right in saying that CA caters for all drug abuse and not just cocaine abuse?

petes

GerB40 wrote: »

Cheers for that, I looked it up and there are CA meetings fairly close to me. Would I right in saying that CA caters for all drug abuse and not just cocaine abuse?

Hi Ger, if it's meetings you are looking to go to I'd suggest an NA (Narcotics Anonymous) meeting and for all types of drug addiction.

I took Xanax when I was withdrawing from the booze, I'm still on it now but use it only when needed. It seems to be a very addictive drug taken in the long term and withdrawals are fierce. I know first hand as when I stopped taking them regularly I went through it. You get rebound anxiety which is worse than the anxiety you were taking them for.

Some people who go to AA also attend NA as they are cross addicted. I don't go to meetings as I mentioned before they aren't for me but they are an option.

The flying mouse

GerB40 wrote: »

Cheers for that, I looked it up and there are CA meetings fairly close to me. Would I right in saying that CA caters for all drug abuse and not just cocaine abuse?

Yea you right there, My main addiction was alcohol, but then to keep me going I would throw in cocaine, ecstasy or any other high, I also then started taking sleepers to come down,

Drop in and see how you get on nothing to lose and everything to gain, good luck, and lets us know how you get on please .

GerB40

Cheers folks, and thanks for helping me again..

tinpib

The model Alison Canavan [no, me neither] is on the Late Late talking about her drinking problem.

Nothing earth shattering in it, it probably could have been any of us up there. Indeed many people on here have overcome/are overcoming bigger problems.

She has a book out on it. I doubt it is "The Grass Arena" anyway. I think it's the ordinariness of her story, she is 20 months sober, so good luck to her. She seems to be doing many of things recommended on here/reddit such as meditation, a gratitude journal, eat well, exercise etc

The flying mouse

I like when celebrity's/famous/leaders people come out and talk about there addictions, As it shows that this addiction has no boundaries', has no religion or politics, And it also counteracts the movies/media swashbuggling!! types who can drink beers and whiskey all night and never wake up with hangovers or puke all over the place :-)

Fair play to her for getting it out there as we all know it takes great courage to admit you have a problem with alcohol in Ireland.

JupiterKid

I've lurched from crisis to crisis in the past few months. I was hospitalised three times (detox in A&E) since June for acute withdrawal symptoms from heavy drinking. My body seems to be telling me that it just can't handle the level of drinking I've been doing.

I'm doing a day alcohol programme and going to AA meetings but I don't think that it's enough. My psychiatrist thinks I need to do (yet another) residential rehab programme. I tend to agree with him. But I've done four rehabs already and whilst I finished them successfully, I relapsed soon after.

The problem is that I live on my own and am very, very lonely. I can't really cope with living on my own. I don't work at present, my parents are sadly passed away (lost my mother at age 15 and my dear Dad died of cancer 2 years ago). My two older sisters both live abroad and even though I'm close to one the other has effectively washed her hands of me over my alcoholism. I have no immediate family in Ireland. I do have an uncle and an aunt in the North and they are very kind and decent but I can't be bothering them with my problems.

If it wasn't for my ex partner who is I still dearly love (and he loves me) I think I would be dead at this stage. He has supported me through thick and thin and has never given up one me even though at times I've driven him to despair over my drinking. But I'm way, way too dependent on him for help. He has his own life to live. I stay over at his place a lot and when I have to go back to my own place I utterly dread it.

Less than a decade ago things were so different, my career was riding high and I was in a happy long-term relationship. I was so self-confident and truly happy and then a workplace bullying incident knocked me to pieces and that's when my drinking problems began. My relationship fell apart and my drinking spiralled out of control.

When I'm in the company of my former partner or my friends, I'm fine but I really feel the urge to drink when I'm on my own and feeling lonely, bored and anxious. I do have friends but we're all just into our 40s now and they have families, jobs, commitments so I can't expect them to drop everything to come over and keep me company - company which I so dearly crave.

Apologies for this tirade, it's just that I feel I needed to explain my situation on here and the reasons why I feel compelled to drink myself to oblivion.

JupiterKid

JupiterKid wrote: »

The problem is that I live on my own and am very, very lonely. I can't really cope with living on my own. I don't work at present, my parents are sadly passed away (lost my mother at age 15 and my dear Dad died of cancer 2 years ago). My two older sisters both live abroad and even though I'm close to one the other has effectively washed her hands of me over my alcoholism. I have no immediate family in Ireland. I do have an uncle and an aunt in the North and they are very kind and decent but I can't be bothering them with my problems.

Hi Jupiter. I was looking at all the things you've tried and thinking to myself when I was in a similar situation the thing that redeemed me was walking all 800km of the Camino Francés in Spain. I needed a radical change of environment, away from my old haunts and old pernicious routines. It was killing me. I see you aren't working but it was very affordable - c. €10- €15 per day including accommodation and food. I've never felt as good as I did that month - I lost @ 15kg in weight - and it was the kick I needed to get off the drink permanently (I gave up alcohol for it, which was easy as it was so hot and the alcohol was dehydrating so it was the last thing I wanted). I drank a shocking amount of water each day, and had a healthy diet of fruit and veg along the way.

It was also stunningly beautiful with immense tradition and history everywhere along the paths, old mills, monasteries, churches etc. It was a very philosophical journey for me. You will also meet new people every day and have no shortage of people to chat to - and often strangers have the best conversation in the knowledge they'll never see each other again. I found it much better going on my own as you set your walking pace and you have much more freedom, but you will still also have people to talk to if you want.

And there's something that changes in the mind with all that walking and good weather. It's truly invigorating. It's like one massive happy drug!

Think outside the box about your options, and appreciate the freedom you have as a single person. I'd love to escape now but those days are gone for me. The very, very best of luck to you!

drydub

So by way of accountability i just wanted to put my thoughts down here. I drank last wednesday. It wasn't a slip, it wasnt anything i beat myself up over. I planned it , went out and responsilbly drank and enjoyed the company and the craic.

I had been dry for 5 weeks and enjoyed it and enjoyed my approach. I had a guest who stayed with me and I went out and bought him beers but stuck to my non alcoholic beers and once he had left i threw out the remaining cans he didnt have.

I've kept busy myself with cycling and just generally getting on and enjoying things that i thought i needed alcohol to enjoy.

I've always looked this thread up to read others posts and repsonses although i didnt want to post at times.

So did reset the clock but im ok with that. I've done more im happy with than to be annoyed at doing something i gave consderation to and enjoyed, for the most part. 5 beers on a mid week night

The flying mouse

JupiterKid wrote: »

I've lurched from crisis to crisis in the past few months. I was hospitalised three times (detox in A&E) since June for acute withdrawal symptoms from heavy drinking. My body seems to be telling me that it just can't handle the level of drinking I've been doing.

I'm doing a day alcohol programme and going to AA meetings but I don't think that it's enough. My psychiatrist thinks I need to do (yet another) residential rehab programme. I tend to agree with him. But I've done four rehabs already and whilst I finished them successfully, I relapsed soon after.

The problem is that I live on my own and am very, very lonely. I can't really cope with living on my own. I don't work at present, my parents are sadly passed away (lost my mother at age 15 and my dear Dad died of cancer 2 years ago). My two older sisters both live abroad and even though I'm close to one the other has effectively washed her hands of me over my alcoholism. I have no immediate family in Ireland. I do have an uncle and an aunt in the North and they are very kind and decent but I can't be bothering them with my problems.

If it wasn't for my ex partner who is I still dearly love (and he loves me) I think I would be dead at this stage. He has supported me through thick and thin and has never given up one me even though at times I've driven him to despair over my drinking. But I'm way, way too dependent on him for help. He has his own life to live. I stay over at his place a lot and when I have to go back to my own place I utterly dread it.

Less than a decade ago things were so different, my career was riding high and I was in a happy long-term relationship. I was so self-confident and truly happy and then a workplace bullying incident knocked me to pieces and that's when my drinking problems began. My relationship fell apart and my drinking spiralled out of control.

When I'm in the company of my former partner or my friends, I'm fine but I really feel the urge to drink when I'm on my own and feeling lonely, bored and anxious. I do have friends but we're all just into our 40s now and they have families, jobs, commitments so I can't expect them to drop everything to come over and keep me company - company which I so dearly crave.

Apologies for this tirade, it's just that I feel I needed to explain my situation on here and the reasons why I feel compelled to drink myself to oblivion.

Hi jupitar I will just give my opieon ,Its only my opinion for what its worth.

So you going from crisis to crisis and nothings changing Are you expecting change to come from magic ? Are you putting in efforts to change ? What ever your doing jupitar is not working so you have to try different roads, Nothing changes if nothing changes jupitar.

Going to AA or anyother fellowship is great, It does not matter to me which one you go to, if there working for you that's what matters, Obvisoly AA is not working for you or maybe your not working for AA, having the knowledge that goes on at meetings is good, putting action in to follow through is where a lot of people fail, You have to put the work in, get involved,and I say this for any fellowship meetings,There is know point going just to make up the numbers, this is to serious for that.

The problem is not that you on your own,The problem is your sufefreng from a addiction/disease/ whatever you want to label it,beat that and you will beat everything else.

You seem to be still in love with your ex partner,which can be understandable ,breaking up in any relationship is very hard,But you have to let go,it seems to me your chasing your tail,go out meet other people ,change your eveoirement.

Once again your thinking back into your past and how good it supposedly was, Its the past jupitar,let it go as we cant live in it, you need to move on and work a programme and keep working the programme.

What anamchesta wrote is an excellent idea, go for it jupitar,you deserve to give yourself some happiness, and it is out there as your know different that many of us here . Good luck and I say all this with repect to you.

The flying mouse

Hi Jupitar again :-)

Here is a link to a post I posted on another thread here, might be useful to you.

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2057646772

The flying mouse

I still here and doing well, how is everyone else doing ?

Chris_Bradley

After 2 over the top nights last weekend & a hangover that lasted until Wednesday, I said f**k that yet again.

I went the Gym Tuesday and weighed myself - a kilo over my usual. Near died working out after. With me, I binge on both food & drink together - without drink my diet is normal.


The dreams were horrible, the sweats were disgusting. It's time for at least 4 weeks off as I'm now getting into that old Friday/Saturday getting bladdered malarky regularly.

Done 6 weeks off it at the start of the year & I never felt so good since beginning drinking at 14.

Wanna feel that cloud rise, wanna stop feeling agitated over nothing.

One week in.....

petes

Chris_Bradley wrote: »

The dreams were horrible, the sweats were disgusting. It's time for at least 4 weeks off as I'm now getting into that old Friday/Saturday getting bladdered malarky regularly.

This bit. I don't know why anyone who has gone thro actual withdra would everyone want to feel like that ever again. I didn't but still drank after it.

Very strange behavior but hey everyone has their own path and has to start somewhere!

222 days. Taking a break from counseling and migh not even go back, see how I am but things are ok at the mo.

Hopw every one is well

Chris_Bradley

petes wrote: »

222 days. Taking a break from counseling and migh not even go back, see how I am but things are ok at the mo.

Hopw every one is well

Fair play.

Can I ask how your health is - I imagine you're feeling very well?

marienbad

Still here , still doing well , enjoying life just as much ever as the years roll by .

In my case I owe it all to AA.

petes

Chris_Bradley wrote: »

Fair play.

Can I ask how your health is - I imagine you're feeling very well?

Physically I'm great! I started exercising again and eating a bit better.

After a while off the drink people were commenting on how well I looked. I probably looked like a ghost half the time!

petes

petes wrote: »

This bit. I don't know why anyone who has gone thro actual withdra would everyone want to feel like that ever again. I didn't but still drank after it.

Very strange behavior but hey everyone has their own path and has to start somewhere!

222 days. Taking a break from counseling and migh not even go back, see how I am but things are ok at the mo.

Hopw every one is well

Now I realise why I prefer typing on a PC rather than a phone, I can hardly make heads or tails of that ha

Bonniedog

Going to match tomorrow. Usually avoid before and afters but will be impossible tomorrow. Can't abide sugary minerals. Any of you tried any of those non alcoholic beers?

Definitely not going to drink, but some part of me would like to blend in with the crowd! If that makes sense :-)

The flying mouse

Bonniedog wrote: »

Going to match tomorrow. Usually avoid before and afters but will be impossible tomorrow. Can't abide sugary minerals. Any of you tried any of those non alcoholic beers?

Definitely not going to drink, but some part of me would like to blend in with the crowd! If that makes sense :-)

Never drank them Bonniedog,as for me I either drank to get drunk or I didn't drink, Always fascinated by the normal drinkers who could have the 2/3 drinks and that be it, for me 1 was to many and 20 not enough, anyway it be a tough challenge alright with the days that's in it.

Good luck with what ever you do and let us know here how you got on.




Ps Up the Dubs

Bonniedog

The flying mouse wrote: »

Never drank them Bonniedog,as for me I either drank to get drunk or I didn't drink, Always fascinated by the normal drinkers who could have the 2/3 drinks and that be it, for me 1 was to many and 20 not enough, anyway it be a tough challenge alright with the days that's in it.

Good luck with what ever you do and let us know here how you got on.




Ps Up the Dubs

Thanks.


Same as that. Fooled myself before into "ah i'll just have a few and I'll be grand tomorrow".

Memory of last time and the horrors of coming off are still fresh enough to stop me going back. I suppose its the idea of having something that looks like a pint!

fizzypish

On the wagon! Started about 6 weeks ago. Fell off after 3 weeks, got back on another 3 weeks and fell off again. Back on again. Forms ok so my recent whoopsie hasn't had any major ramifications. Head down, power through and stick with the 0% beers!

Glen_Quagmire

Heard on the radio this morning of a clinic that fits some kind of implant into your body which takes away the urge to consume alcohol and the pleasure it provides. I think the implant lasts 3 months.

Anyone ever hear about that?

Amazingfun

"Near beer" still has trace amounts of alcohol, and is a definite no-no for those who subscribe to Dr. Silkworth's "physical allergy" theory, which is what AA's step one is largely based on.

....In this statement he confirms what we who have suffered alcoholic torture must believe-that the body of the alcoholic is quite as abnormal as his mind. It did not satisfy us to be told that we could not control our drinking just because we were maladjusted to life, that we were in full flight from reality, or were outright mental defectives. These things were true to some extent, in fact, to a considerable extent with some of us. But we are sure that our bodies were sickened as well. In our belief, any picture of the alcoholic which leaves out this physical factor is incomplete.
The doctor's theory that we have an allergy to alcohol interests us. As laymen, our opinion as to its soundness may, of course, mean little. But as ex-problem drinkers, we can say that his explanation makes good sense. It explains many things for which we cannot otherwise account.

http://silkworth.net/gsowatch/litbook.pdf


It's why I, even now at almost 15 years of sobriety, would not even consider drinking it.
Why risk setting that whole mess off again?
No thanks.

The flying mouse

Amazingfun wrote: »

"Near beer" still has trace amounts of alcohol, and is a definite no-no for those who subscribe to Dr. Silkworth's "physical allergy" theory, which is what AA's step one is largely based on.


http://silkworth.net/gsowatch/litbook.pdf


It's why I, even now at almost 15 years of sobriety, would not even consider drinking it.
Why risk setting that whole mess off again?
No thanks.

same here, I wouldn't go near non alcoholic beer.

The flying mouse

(If interested) The results from the Dublin/Mayo Gaa final was a draw this weekend, What was yours ?


I am still winning :-)

bikubesong

Hey all, some great reading in this thread. I was doing pretty well until a recent slip, now it's Day 3 all over again. Went to a meeting this evening and I'm going to try and fit in more than I had previously made time for. I'll be sticking my head into this forum too to try and keep it up.

The flying mouse

bikubesong wrote: »

Hey all, some great reading in this thread. I was doing pretty well until a recent slip, now it's Day 3 all over again. Went to a meeting this evening and I'm going to try and fit in more than I had previously made time for. I'll be sticking my head into this forum too to try and keep it up.

Great, we have strength and encouragement in numbers here.

Glen_Quagmire

Another weekend on the beer and feeling poxy this morning. For the first time I'm actually seriously considering an AA meeting but the thoughts of going to one is a bit worrying as I don't know what to expect or who I may bump into.