Games so bad, boring or ridiculous they should never been released

Myrddin

o1s1n wrote: »

Excellent! If you do happen to find any episodes, give me a shout.

I have these really vivid childhood memories of sitting in after school in the depths of winter in front of a roaring fire watching that. Good times!

You know it :cool:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jls0kCeadQs

o1s1n

Watched the two first parts of that (they took an absolute age to load up on my ****ty internet connection) and that's still really enjoyable!

Methinks Ciderdude was just a cynical teenager when it came out :pac:

batari

Knightmare was the best thing on tv back in the day. I often wondered whether it should be remade with todays advances in technology?

ciDeR, sure you were probably nearing 30 when it was on tv, and were just too 'cool' to watch it :P

yrwhu8jxtni06a

batari wrote: »

Knightmare was the best thing on tv back in the day. I often wondered whether it should be remade with todays advances in technology?

ciDeR, sure you were probably nearing 30 when it was on tv, and were just too 'cool' to watch it :P

There was an VR in the works but nothing else came out of it,not a fan either looking back now,reminds of the ye olde text adventure games,"pick up item,go to door,the door wont open", AAAAAAAAAGH,anyways here VR pilot and fan page-

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lt3gvwTP9Dg

http://www.knightmare.com/

Funkfield

DinoRex wrote: »

Hey! Knightmare was a great show. Got to love Treguard.

But I do remember the C64 game being awful. Don't think I ever figured out how to get by the second screen.

There was a very good Knightmare game on the Amiga though that was in the style of Eye of the Beholder.

I have never heard of anyone getting by the second room!

I loved the tv show though.

DinoRex

Funkfield wrote: »

I have never heard of anyone getting by the second room!

I loved the tv show though.

Good to know I wasn't a thicko.

I do remember the show being the best thing on Friday afternoon TV until Batman the Animated series came along.

CiDeRmAn

That was it, I was too old at that stage to appreciate it.
Had moved onto the Crystal Maze around then, I think..

As for Addams Family on Speccy, looks pretty good actually, the gameplay in these things was always rock hard and unforgiving.
The colours are nice, given the extremely limited palette at the machines disposal.

Batman and Head Over Heels, now they were a brilliant pair of games.
The Speccy was actually a great machine, but you would have to go back to when it was all optimised for the format, no multiloading crap, back in 84-88 say.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XO5oyUyvDDw

CiDeRmAn

DinoRex wrote: »

Good to know I wasn't a thicko.

I do remember the show being the best thing on Friday afternoon TV until Batman the Animated series came along.

That must have been around 90/91, I remember Batman The Animated Series as a revelation.
Warner were doing all the best stuff back then, Tiny Toons Adventures was top class, remember watching the feature length one on nights when I was training, back in the day, brilliant stuff before it was eventually replaced in my heart by Animaniacs, Pinky and The Brain, Freakazoid etc.
Never watched the Superman cartoons nor the various Batman cartoons since, they never seemed as "earnest" as that Batman series of the early 90's.

Of course, I was getting into my 20's so Beavis & Butthead and Ren & Stimpy were a-callin' !

alpahaeagle

I remember watching Knightmare and thought it was the bees knees, but after the first couple of shows found it to be boring...Same rooms, same puzzles and the bloke dressed in medeival costume jabbering on in the background. I am sorry, but it just did not float my boat.
As for the the Spectrum that was a brill machine. Spent many an hour playing that, mostly played Ulitmate play the game games....Jetpac ( have on Xbox), Transam, Knight Lore,Saberwolf and atic atac.

http://www.youtube.com/watchfeature=player_detailpage&v=xJaHK8dJKbw

Good Times

Myrddin

alpahaeagle wrote: »

I remember watching Knightmare and thought it was the bees knees, but after the first couple of shows found it to be boring...Same rooms, same puzzles and the bloke dressed in medeival costume jabbering on in the background. I am sorry, but it just did not float my boat.
As for the the Spectrum that was a brill machine. Spent many an hour playing that, mostly played Ulitmate play the game games....Jetpac ( have on Xbox), Transam, Knight Lore,Saberwolf and atic atac.

http://www.youtube.com/watchfeature=player_detailpage&v=xJaHK8dJKbw

Good Times

I think what happened is if it made an impression on you as a kid, it sticks with you through the years. Unless your Retr0, big impressions like that tend to survive the cynicism that sets in in later years It explains why I had to buy a 3DO, and why Cider doesn't rate Knightmare (he never liked it much to begin with, so no impression was made).

komodosp

Generally tended to be C64 remakes of Arcade games,

esp.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LFJHOz3TSgg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cc5JL3ZF7MI

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PqLXXD0pVH0

komodosp

And who could forget Gremlins 2 on the C64... Which I couldn't find a video for

CiDeRmAn

I had Gremlins on the Speccy, it was pretty good.
Plus, it taught me the word "peruse", which is nice....
To this day I sometimes, just sometimes peruse the papers, instead of flicking through them, although more often it's only when I buy the Sunday Times!

Atavan-Halen

CiDeRmAn wrote: »

I had Gremlins on the Speccy, it was pretty good.
Plus, it taught me the word "peruse", which is nice....
To this day I sometimes, just sometimes peruse the papers, instead of flicking through them, although more often it's only when I buy the Sunday Times!

You can't peruse the sunday papers without a monacle.

o1s1n

atavan-halen wrote: »

You can't peruse the sunday papers without a monacle.

And a top hat. You really can't forget the top hat.

Myrddin

I peruse Boards. (whatever that means)

DinoRex

komodosp wrote: »

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PqLXXD0pVH0

Oh yes that was awful. Spectrum level of graphics there.

They did a better job with the sequel. But I think it was cartridge only back when Commodore were deluded enough to think the C64GS would take off.

deathrider

I was going to mention this one:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5wFWIyCr3rc

... But looking back at these clips now, it doesn't seem as bad as I remember.

super_furry

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OGdPe1gq4TY

Double Dragon on the C64 was positvely next gen compared to this dross.

sensibleken

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9TZ-6U3vVGw

Did anyone ever figure out what to do on this one?

DinoRex

sensibleken wrote: »

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9TZ-6U3vVGw

Did anyone ever figure out what to do on this one?

Oh. Nightbreed: The Action Game.

I remember playing alright and not having a clue what I was supposed to do. Seemed to let you wander around pretty far into the game though but I could never actually accomplish anything.

Night Breed: The Intereactive Movie on the Amiga was a very strange beast though. Don't even know what genre you'd consider it to be. It was oddly compelling though.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tf1B0f2ggZA

CiDeRmAn

I read the book, then watched the film and believe me, all very confusing, so not much hope for the game then!
That said the movie did hit new heights for make up effects, and new lows for a script that made sense.
This is why Clive Barker is very much in second place compared to Niel Gaiman, though he does have the top spot in creatures that like to devour flesh whist having their own stomachs pulled apart with fish hooks, but thats what we in the business call a "niche award"

pdbhp

komodosp wrote: »

Generally tended to be C64 remakes of Arcade games,

esp.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LFJHOz3TSgg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cc5JL3ZF7MI

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PqLXXD0pVH0

Damn that I used to like all those games.........I suck:(

DinoRex

CiDeRmAn wrote: »

I read the book, then watched the film and believe me, all very confusing, so not much hope for the game then!
That said the movie did hit new heights for make up effects, and new lows for a script that made sense.
This is why Clive Barker is very much in second place compared to Niel Gaiman, though he does have the top spot in creatures that like to devour flesh whist having their own stomachs pulled apart with fish hooks, but thats what we in the business call a "niche award"

The best thing about Nightbreed was David Cronnenberg playing the bad guy. He's not an actor so came across as really off kilter and creepy.

CiDeRmAn

He turns up in a few of his movies too, but yes, that was pretty good.
I remember being in the old Forbidden Planet on Dawson St where they had Fangoria and a special on the makeup of NightBreed, pretty amazing stuff.

Retr0gamer

deathrider wrote: »

I was going to mention this one:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5wFWIyCr3rc

... But looking back at these clips now, it doesn't seem as bad as I remember.

This one is actually a bit of a hidden gem and really fun.

Atavan-Halen

EnterNow wrote: »

I peruse Boards. (whatever that means)

Lol EnterNow peruses boards How embarassing!

CiDeRmAn

atavan-halen wrote: »

Lol EnterNow peruses boards How embarassing!

Try being about 12 and trying to figure out why the game won't let you just look in the box?
I mean, that was the problem with 80's text adventures, and there were loads on the Speccy.
The games parser was limited by the responses the programmer was likely to expect his audience to use, this is why The Hobbit was so good, it was relatively simple to play.
But Gremlins, I mean, come on!
Referring to earlier posts on the topic, perhaps the programmer/designer of the game sat in their lounge chair, sipping sherry, smoking a pipe and reading the Financial Times, adjusting their top hat and monocle every now and then, while making the word "peruse" the only way to have a search/look into a box!

Myrddin

atavan-halen wrote: »

Lol EnterNow peruses boards How embarassing!

Had to look up the definition after that post, I'm in the clear though

DinoRex

CiDeRmAn wrote: »

Try being about 12 and trying to figure out why the game won't let you just look in the box?
I mean, that was the problem with 80's text adventures, and there were loads on the Speccy.

Leisure Suit Larry was awful for it's Americanisations.

Can't remember how long it too me to realise it wanted me to type 'trash' instead of 'rubbish'

yrwhu8jxtni06a

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0bksFXZL7JQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5qvF6fVTzZ0

CiDeRmAn

The biggest flaw with the Speccy Final Fight is, aside from asking the hardware to run it at all, the scrolling is too juddery to make playing comfortable.
I reckon better to ask the Speccy to play Gameboy type games then try to keep up with the Nes, never mind the Snes.
The Amiga version of SFII looks pretty good actually, and given how moddable the Amiga is I'd say you could get a network game going on if you really wanted too!
Kerbdog was using an Amiga to browse the interweb back in 95 or so, very impressive it was.

DinoRex

Amiga SF2 was a bit sluggish though, and of course you only had one button.

Didn't have paralax scrolling either, which the Amiga was well able for.

Shadow Fighter and Body Blows where the best examples of fighters on the Amiga:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0tZQJdOjHo0

yrwhu8jxtni06a

DinoRex wrote: »

Amiga SF2 was a bit sluggish though, and of course you only had one button.

Mortal kombat was great on it,even better than MD port

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DJYXAVe0XhY

o1s1n

I was playing the MK 2 port on the Amiga last night and I dunno, it didn't seem to top the Megadrive version. The colours are really washed out, the animations look crap and it handles like a dog.

Its been a while since I've played MD MK2, but I don't think it was as bad as that.

yrwhu8jxtni06a

o1s1n wrote: »

I was playing the MK 2 port on the Amiga last night and I dunno, it didn't seem to top the Megadrive version. The colours are really washed out, the animations look crap and it handles like a dog.

Its been a while since I've played MD MK2, but I don't think it was as bad as that.

Bah we had to do with floppies and swap them for a fatality.

o1s1n

I still find that really hilarious

yrwhu8jxtni06a

o1s1n wrote: »

I still find that really hilarious

Alot of Amig games originally didnt have HD install so titter ye not.

Myrddin

Waylon Obedient Gipsy wrote: »

Bah we had to do with floppies and swap them for a fatality.

Are you serious? Lol, ya gotta love magnetic storage

yrwhu8jxtni06a

EnterNow wrote: »

Are you serious? Lol, ya gotta love magnetic storage

Different disks,they where double density,aka 880kb not the usual 1.44mb sort on the regular pcs

jaysus i seem to be giving lessons in all this today.

melekalikimaka

Anyone ever play a terrible game called 'Angel Devoid' truely terrible

Chaotic_Forces

The power rangers movie game for the Megadrive... just horrible. It was the same three enemies over and over; literally. Oh wait, I think they had a boss or two

CiDeRmAn

For worst, it has to be the Street Fighter: The Movie game that the lads were playing in MonkeyFudges place of residence on Retrogaming Beers Night.
Not only a poor version of a great game, but all that money making a poor version of a great game which is based on an awful awful movie which is based on a great game and a poor reflection of some great manga/anime based on a great game.

I wonder if the various parts of the developers were ever found?
Are they in the foundations of Kansai International Airport?

pdbhp

CiDeRmAn wrote: »

For worst, it has to be the Street Fighter: The Movie game that the lads were playing in MonkeyFudges place of residence on Retrogaming Beers Night.?

MonkeyFudge was that the guy drinking the wine?

Retr0gamer

Found the MD verison of MK2 to be utterly appalling just like most of Probe Softwares output. It was a terrible port of the game that removed all the juggle combos leaving a very simple and boring fighter. The SNES version which should have been worse because of the memory problems snes games had (they took up more space than megadrive games on the cartridges) managed to include all the juggle combos and was an excellent coversion.

The SNES port of MK1 is also gameplay wise is nigh on identical to the arcade version whereas the MD version is another disgraceful port by Probe. However since the blood was removed and it was a god awful game to begin with the megadrive one is considered better since the gore was the only thing that game had going for it.

CiDeRmAn wrote: »

For worst, it has to be the Street Fighter: The Movie game that the lads were playing in MonkeyFudges place of residence on Retrogaming Beers Night.

Funnily enough the Saturn and PS1 ports of the game are really good. They are based more around SSF2T than mortal kombat like tha arcade game and therefore play really well despite looking like assdue to the use of digitised sprites.

Chaotic_Forces

I think the problem wik MK 2 for the Megadrive was the fact the AI was basically impossible to beat. Fire an ice bolt, it ducks. Uppercut it, it ducks, uppercuts you when you should have hit it first. There are a bunch. I think some of the combos worked with Reptile well, though.

Retr0gamer

His fireball to uppercut is about as complex as it got. I think Mileenas infinite combo was in there as well. If the combo was more than 2 hits long though you could forget about it.

Chaotic_Forces

Maybe I'm thinking of UMK3...

Wasn't there an infinite for Kitana? Or was that also just in UMK3? :P

Retr0gamer

I'm probably getting the two girls mixed up. Probe did a better job of MK3 and Ultimate MK3 which unfortunately suffered the same fate as SSF2 on the MD with the ultra tiny character sprites to save memory. Still UMK3 and MK3 were really bad games and all the combos were predefined dial a combos which made it a bit boring.

Chaotic_Forces

Kitana was the girl with fans; the infinite involved using the floating fan move

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1PPFtfW5nnE&feature=related

That's one of the infinites (I never really was serious about the MK games so I didn't know if it worked when I had it).

I think MK3 was the best. UMK3 kind of just broke it with Noob Saibot (I'm sure he was in UMK3).