I need help with my script

Phony Scott

Hi everyone,

I have a five page script which is stuck in rewrites at the moment. I've shown it to a few people to get opinions. It's a horror which I wrote during a difficult period in my life. I believed I was writing something very dark and nihilistic and figured everyone else would see it that way too.

The story is open to interpretation but the main character dies at the end, though it is still fairly ambiguous as to what is happening. Yet one person gave me feedback which twisted the story on its head and I really didn’t see it coming. Personally I loved it. It suggested that what the character was really doing was purging negative energy.

The thing with this new angle suggested by my friend is that it is much more positive and I figured it would make a nice happy ending. There’s two problems here (a) it’s a happy ending to a short which is very nihilistic; think ‘The Seventh Continent’ early Michael Haneke nihilism, (b) it will be revealed to have all be just a bad dream which is hugely clichéd.

So, in essence, it’s the ‘Seventh Continent’ family waking up after killing themselves via the ending to 'A Christmas Carol'!

The potential happy ending could be seen to be shoehorned in and very cheesy.

Do people prefer horror films with a happy ending or one with a downbeat ending?

I’m putting up a poll in the main film forum as to which is better to see what answers come out. It should make an interesting topic.

Galvasean

While I'm not of the opinion that horrors should have 'happy' or 'bad' endings (depends on the piece, characters etc.), I would definately avoid any 'it was actually a dream' type endings. Nothing pisses the audience off more than discovering that the whole film beared no actual consecuences on the protagonist.

the_syco

Galvasean wrote: »

Nothing pisses the audience off more than discovering that the whole film beared no actual consecuences on the protagonist.

How about the film shows the main character waking up, walk outside, and then die, as they're still in the hellhole? :P

AnonoBoy

You should write what you feel is best for the script - taking polls on what people want in a film is a pointless exercise I feel.

Scripts shouldn't be written by committee.

Phony Scott

AnonoBoy wrote: »

You should write what you feel is best for the script - taking polls on what people want in a film is a pointless exercise I feel.

Scripts shouldn't be written by committee.

It's purely for study at the end of the day. I'm a writer by heart, but at the moment, I'm just taking a week or two away from writing it so I can clear my head. I just want to get a feeling of more opinions. For free.

I agree that scripts shouldn't written by committee, but certainly when it comes to looking for finance for them, they certainly seem to be judged! :pac:

AnonoBoy

Phony Scott wrote: »

I agree that scripts shouldn't written by committee, but certainly when it comes to looking for finance for them, they certainly seem to be judged! :pac:

Of course your script is going to be judged but shoving in an ending just because you think it's what people want is only going to damage your script. Audiences want a good story and if they feel cheated by an ending they won't leave the cinema happy.

Phony Scott

AnonoBoy wrote: »

shoving in an ending just because you think it's what people want is only going to damage your script. Audiences want a good story and if they feel cheated by an ending they won't leave the cinema happy.

The thing is, when I started writing this thing, it was done through so-called 'reverse engineering' i.e. I had the ending first and worked backwards. The happy ending can be placed in but it doesn’t upset the overall structure of the story, it actually adds layers to the story that simply aren’t (and thematically cannot be) present in the downbeat ending.

The issue for me is that as a horror (does it sound like a horror?), despite the added texture to the story with the happier ending, it somehow doesn’t ring true to me. The pole proves this so far.

AnonoBoy

Phony Scott wrote: »

The thing is, when I started writing this thing, it was done through so-called 'reverse engineering' i.e. I had the ending first and worked backwards. The happy ending can be placed in but it doesn’t upset the overall structure of the story, it actually adds layers to the story that simply aren’t (and thematically cannot be) present in the downbeat ending.

The issue for me is that as a horror (does it sound like a horror?), despite the added texture to the story with the happier ending, it somehow doesn’t ring true to me. The pole proves this so far.

What poll?

If it doesn't work for you then how do you expect it to work for the audience? You've got to write the best script you can write, you can't try to second guess what people want and change your own film to suit that.

Phony Scott

AnonoBoy wrote: »

What poll? If it doesn't work for you then how do you expect it to work for the audience?

Poll

But my point is that both endings are working in there own little ways, so I'm stuck.

AnonoBoy wrote: »

You've got to write the best script you can write, you can't try to second guess what people want and change your own film to suit that.

I'm not writing at the moment, I'm producing i.e. gathering information like good producers do.

ultain

AnonoBoy wrote: »

Of course your script is going to be judged but shoving in an ending just because you think it's what people want is only going to damage your script. Audiences want a good story and if they feel cheated by an ending they won't leave the cinema happy.

So tell me..why is there so much of the same genre out here...is it not because "That's what people want" the hypodermic syringe model

Phony Scott

ultain wrote: »

So tell me..why is there so much of the same genre out here...is it not because "That's what people want" the hypodermic syringe model

I can answer this to a certain point. I love art-house and intelligent films, but sometimes I want junk food for the brain or the happy meal. One of the best out there is the Friday 13th 'franchise'. I love 'em and give me more!

AnonoBoy

ultain wrote: »

So tell me..why is there so much of the same genre out here...is it not because "That's what people want" the hypodermic syringe model

I'm not denying that's out there I'm just saying a lot of happy-clappy sh*te that does well in Hollywood is often very poorly written.

Grown Ups did quite well in the cinemas. I have yet to hear one person say that it was well written.

I'm talking about a proper film and really it should be written the way the author feels rings true.

Films that change their endings after audience previews can often end up being trite and very very unoriginal.

There's a market for sh*t - just look at all the drivel that does so well on TV while quality programmes like Freaks and Geeks gets canned. However we're not talking about mass appeal here are we? We're talking about making Phony Scott's script the best it can be.

Phony Scott

AnonoBoy wrote: »

I'm not denying that's out there I'm just saying a lot of happy-clappy sh*te that does well in Hollywood is often very poorly written.

I'm talking about a proper film and really it should be written the way the author feels rings true.

Films that change their endings after audience previews can often end up being trite and very very unoriginal.

I completely agree that most Hollywood films (along with every other place don't forget) are generally very poorly written like you say.

Remember the old William Goldman adage "Nobody Knows Anything". Really nobody, including myself, knows if I'm doing the right thing. It maybe a hit with audiences, yet be artistically empty or it could be the total reverse.
Who honestly knows. It's really a crapshoot...

Darko gave me the most comfortable advice for my needs as a first timer directing, shoot two versions of the script and edit two cuts and see which works. This seems like the best way to go, and sure, it'll cost more money, but I believe in both versions of the idea enough to find extra money.

iguana

Dream ending are generally awful, a complete insult to the audience. If you go with a dream ending it will have to be very, very cleverly done. Maybe something like The Twilight Zone episode; The Midnight Sun, where at the end of the episode, the protagonist wakes wakes from a dream of an overheated apocalyptic earth to discover she is in bed with a bad fever. She is extremely relieved but from her neighbour and doctor the audience learns that she is actually on an apocalyptically underheated earth.

(It was clever and unusual for 1961 anyway.)

BlitzKrieg

Do people prefer horror films with a happy ending or one with a downbeat ending?

I perfer horror movies that develop from genuine fears and issues of society. Another thread asked why all the zombie movies. And when you look at the modern world, it makes sense why zombie movies are currently quite popular. Similary there was a spike in slasher films in the 80's when suburbia felt under threat in america which also makes use of popular fears.

One thing though

-If you've written a script and you can essentially switch endings on a whim without much change to the prior 4 minutes then you have the wrong ending simply put.