Signs a man is afraid of a new relationship/afraid of commitment

MissJustice

guys would you be able to shed some light on this subject? Thanks a mill

Mods please place this issue into a forum where it can be discussed if it is not appropriate here

Praetorian Saighdiuir

OOOOOOhhhhh i hope this goes to P.I quick.


Iv an itchy post finger here!

PandyAndy

Breaking up with you would probably be the biggest give away.

RedXIV

He can't change his underwear because they've been together so long

easyeason3

When he doesn't ring you it means he really, really wants you.
You should keep ringing & texting him even if he doesn't reply. Men love this.

Cheap Thrills!

Scarlet for ya OP.

MissJustice

easyeason3 wrote: »

When he doesn't ring you it means he really, really wants you.
You should keep ringing & texting him even if he doesn't reply. Men love this.

hahahaha!

MissJustice

Cheap Thrills! wrote: »

Scarlet for ya OP.

I would like some views on this particularly from irish guys

Canis Lupus

MissJustice wrote: »

afraid of a new relationship/afraid of commitment

Or just can't be arsed. Annoys me when we're 'afraid' of commitment when we just want to shag lots of women.

Agricola

When you mention something about moving in with him, he goes abit like Bishop Brennan after he was kicked up the arse.

easyeason3

You may as well tell us the full story so we can get a clear picture on how to help you. Tell us everything OP, sharing is caring.

Duggy747

easyeason3 wrote: »

When he doesn't ring you it means he really, really wants you.
You should keep ringing & texting him even if he doesn't reply. Men love this.

Exactly. Especially when they send you a text, then 15 minutes later resend the text, 30 minutes later send another text asking did you get the 1st text and 5 minutes later ringing you if you got any of the texts.

We love it.

As for signs:

When he has pass up on seeing his friends so he can stay at home talking about "where the relationship is going" and fùckin' cuddles you can see the cold, dead, feign smile on his face as he listens to you talk utter bollox about trivial things like the girl at work you don't like. Men love to hear women waffle on about absolutely nothing and people they have or never will meet in their lives.

Kimono-Girl

When he gets a printed T-Shirt with a sign on it saying "i am afraid of commitment"

Captain_Generic

easyeason3 wrote: »

You may as well tell us the full story so we can get a clear picture on how to help you. Tell us everything OP, sharing is caring.

You can trust us, we're the internet

Ricardo G

He is not afraid of commitment......he is monogamously challenged !!

easyeason3

Duggy747 wrote: »

Exactly. Especially when they send you a text, then 15 minutes later resend the text, 30 minutes later send another text asking did you get the 1st text and 5 minutes later ringing you if you got any of the texts.

We love it.

As for signs:

When he has pass up on seeing his friends so he can stay at home talking about "where the relationship is going" and fùckin' cuddles you can see the cold, dead, feign smile on his face as he listens to you talk utter bollox about trivial things like the girl at work you don't like. Men love to hear women waffle on about absolutely nothing and people they have or never will meet in their lives.

And don't forget how ye love it when a woman organises your time together. Especially when it involves spending lots of time around her family & that ye do everything as a couple now.

Canis Lupus

easyeason3 wrote: »

You may as well tell us the full story so we can get a clear picture on how to help you. Tell us everything OP, sharing is caring.

Including sex life. Details are important. Pics if you have them also good.

flyton5

He's probably sleeping with your sister...

jugger

or mother:D

orourkeda

Lack of intercourse

Duggy747

easyeason3 wrote: »

And don't forget how ye love it when a woman organises your time together. Especially when it involves spending lots of time around her family & that ye do everything as a couple now.

Yes, man-time is now irrelevant. Her friends that she chooses for you are now your new & improved friends, replacing your old "unsavoury" best friends...........even if you can't stand the sight of them.

Anything you enjoyed doing / watching must now be put aside for an obscure hour when she's asleep because she doesn't want to watch it.

She does, however, want you to watch some mushy film with her :pac:

*sweeping generalisations

Millicent

Listen, there's no such thing as afraid of a relationship/afraid of commitment in the early stages. It's bollox psychobabble that's pedalled out to make women feel better. If he likes you, he will want to ride you/see you/ speak to you on a regular basis. If not, he doesn't really like you all that much.

I wish people would stop buying into this shit. If he's not texting or calling, treating you badly or seems like he doesn't want a relationship, he does not want you. End of. It may sound cruel but if he liked you, you'd be in no doubt. Why would you want to be with someone who didn't seem to want to be with you anyway?

J K

A wise man once said - i think it was descartes - "He's just not that in to you"

pragmatic1

Why dont you just ask him instead of looking for signs.

jester77

He's probably just weighing up his options.

tallaghtmick

the only commitment i want is that my son gets everything he needs while hes very young and that het gets as much time with me as possible,why do women not get that?

LighterGuy

Millicent wrote: »

Listen, there's no such thing as afraid of a relationship/afraid of commitment in the early stages. It's bollox psychobabble that's pedalled out to make women feel better. If he likes you, he will want to ride you/see you/ speak to you on a regular basis. If not, he doesn't really like you all that much.

I wish people would stop buying into this shit. If he's not texting or calling, treating you badly or seems like he doesn't want a relationship, he does not want you. End of. It may sound cruel but if he liked you, you'd be in no doubt. Why would you want to be with someone who didn't seem to want to be with you anyway?

Agreed.
To many people even BS themselves saying "maybe he/she isnt into the whole texting/contacting alot" - while ignoring that its a sign they are not into you.

Gunsfortoys

Try a magic 8 ball OP.

stovelid

"It's not you, it's me".

"I just don't want to be with anybody at the moment, really".

"You're too good for me".

"It's not the right time".

"Things are moving too fast".

Translation:

I don't want to go out with you and within a hour of this conversation, I will be relentlessly chasing skirt again.

strokemyclover

If you use two seperate cars to go to the cinema from the same location

Eric Cartman

why do we men have to be 'afraid' of commitment, tbh he probably just wants to ride a few burds and your being crazy and wrecking his buzz

stateofflux

god i hate that word 'committment' ....like something from catholic ireland in 1940...also instantly kills dick hardness when mentioned

stovelid

stateofflux wrote: »

god i hate that word 'committment' ...also instantly kills dick hardness when mentioned

True

newmug

Millicent wrote: »

Listen, there's no such thing as afraid of a relationship/afraid of commitment in the early stages. It's bollox psychobabble that's pedalled out to make women feel better. If he likes you, he will want to ride you/see you/ speak to you on a regular basis. If not, he doesn't really like you all that much.

I wish people would stop buying into this shit. If he's not texting or calling, treating you badly or seems like he doesn't want a relationship, he does not want you. End of. It may sound cruel but if he liked you, you'd be in no doubt. Why would you want to be with someone who didn't seem to want to be with you anyway?

THIS SHOULD BE STICKIED!!!!!

Michael 09

mconigol

When he has a penis.

St.Spodo

Millicent wrote: »

Listen, there's no such thing as afraid of a relationship/afraid of commitment in the early stages. It's bollox psychobabble that's pedalled out to make women feel better. If he likes you, he will want to ride you/see you/ speak to you on a regular basis. If not, he doesn't really like you all that much.

I wish people would stop buying into this shit. If he's not texting or calling, treating you badly or seems like he doesn't want a relationship, he does not want you. End of. It may sound cruel but if he liked you, you'd be in no doubt. Why would you want to be with someone who didn't seem to want to be with you anyway?

Agreed.What sort of pussy is afraid of a relationship? All of these sort of terms are just euphemisms. They have no literal meaning. I'm sure if he really did have an interest in you, you'd know for certain.

TheZohanS

Millicent wrote: »

Listen, there's no such thing as afraid of a relationship/afraid of commitment in the early stages. It's bollox psychobabble that's pedalled out to make women feel better. If he likes you, he will want to ride you/see you/ speak to you on a regular basis. If not, he doesn't really like you all that much.

I wish people would stop buying into this shit. If he's not texting or calling, treating you badly or seems like he doesn't want a relationship, he does not want you. End of. It may sound cruel but if he liked you, you'd be in no doubt. Why would you want to be with someone who didn't seem to want to be with you anyway?

Aye or he might just have too much crap on his plate and he doesn't have time or is not in the right place to make a decent go of it. A lot of it is about timing too.

Alter-Ego

You need to trap this man, OP. We men dont really understand the world around us and need the wimmins to tell us how to live our lives.

Remember the 3 N's?

Nag, Nag, Nag.

saywhatyousee

Alter-Ego wrote: »

You need to trap this man, OP. We men dont really understand the world around us and need the wimmins to tell us how to live our lives.

Remember the 3 N's?

Nag, Nag, Nag.

proper way to trap a man is to purposely break a condom:o

Trog

J K wrote: »

A wise man once said - i think it was descartes - "He's just not that in to you"

Cogito Ergo, let's just be friends... with benefits?

OP, all men want a girlfriend at some stage. No man, however, wants that girlfriend to be less [slutty/hot/fun/whatever their main priority is] than another girl who he might meet soon. Sometimes he'll reckon it's worth 100% effort to see how it pans out, sometimes he won't. If things work out, you won't have to worry about a 'fear of commitment'. Like it was said earlier, there's no such thing. There's just guys who aren't too pushed with you.

And forget any 'why would he still see me sometimes if he doesn't like me' type reasoning. Fact of the matter is, sex with someone you're not that into is better than a ****.

Now, I'm not saying he's definitely not into you. To find that out, and here's a revolutionary idea, you should ASK HIM, and not post on an internet forum for people you don't know to guess how he feels.

kincsem

I saw a film about this once starring James Caan and Kathy Bates.

BickNarry

stovelid wrote: »

"I just don't want to be with anybody at the moment, really".

"It's not the right time".

"Things are moving too fast".

Translation:

I don't want to go out with you and within a hour of this conversation, I will be relentlessly chasing skirt again.

Its people like you who get me in trouble!!!!!!

I don't want to go out with anyone (ever? who knows) and if a girl starts acting like my girlfriend i'll tell em it is too fast. But then they side with you and decide i'm 'playing' them.

You can't win!

Millicent

TheZohan wrote: »

Aye or he might just have too much crap on his plate and he doesn't have time or is not in the right place to make a decent go of it. A lot of it is about timing too.

Meh, disinterest is disinterest. Sometimes you meet someone at a bad time of their life; sometimes they're not emotionally ready for a relationship; sometimes they have too much on their plate to cope with a relationship. My point is, there is no point trying to change that person or yourself for a relationship that is not up to your standards. It is what it is and [general you] your energy is better spent on someone who is emotionally available.

Eric Cartman

BickNarry wrote: »

Its people like you who get me in trouble!!!!!!

I don't want to go out with anyone (ever? who knows) and if a girl starts acting like my girlfriend i'll tell em it is too fast. But then they side with you and decide i'm 'playing' them.

You can't win!

you can never win that one mate, but giving in and going out with some crazy b*tch is definitley not the answer

also heres a translation guide for when listening to women talking about men :

"hes a stalker" = "a guy i dont find physically attractive talked to me once in a pub or other small place and I saw him 2-3 more times , he must be stalking me because Im so attractive :rolleyes:"

"hes an asshole" = "I tried to get him to be my boyfriend, didnt work, had sex with him , then he told me to f*ck off because i was being needy and desperate"

"I wish I could meet a nice guy" = "I wish I could meet a guy with 10/10 looks and a massive bank balance"

"Im not really looking for a boyfriend right now" = "i want a ride without my friends calling me a slut"

"Hes the best boyfriend ever" = "he spends sh*tloads of money on me"

Millicent

Eric Cartman wrote: »

you can never win that one mate, but giving in and going out with some crazy b*tch is definitley not the answer

also heres a translation guide for when listening to women talking about men :

"hes a stalker" = "a guy i dont find physically attractive talked to me once in a pub or other small place and I saw him 2-3 more times , he must be stalking me because Im so attractive :rolleyes:"

"hes an asshole" = "I tried to get him to be my boyfriend, didnt work, had sex with him , then he told me to f*ck off because i was being needy and desperate"

"I wish I could meet a nice guy" = "I wish I could meet a guy with 10/10 looks and a massive bank balance"

"Im not really looking for a boyfriend right now" = "i want a ride without my friends calling me a slut"

"Hes the best boyfriend ever" = "he spends sh*tloads of money on me"

Good job. Sums us all up.

clouds

Eric Cartman wrote: »

you can never win that one mate, but giving in and going out with some crazy b*tch is definitley not the answer

also heres a translation guide for when listening to women talking about men :

"hes a stalker" = "a guy i dont find physically attractive talked to me once in a pub or other small place and I saw him 2-3 more times , he must be stalking me because Im so attractive :rolleyes:"

"hes an asshole" = "I tried to get him to be my boyfriend, didnt work, had sex with him , then he told me to f*ck off because i was being needy and desperate"

"I wish I could meet a nice guy" = "I wish I could meet a guy with 10/10 looks and a massive bank balance"

"Im not really looking for a boyfriend right now" = "i want a ride without my friends calling me a slut"

"Hes the best boyfriend ever" = "he spends sh*tloads of money on me"

Good luck with that.:rolleyes:

Micky Dolenz

TheZohan wrote: »

Aye or he might just have too much crap on his plate and he doesn't have time or is not in the right place to make a decent go of it. A lot of it is about timing too.

Yeah. How many times have you met the right person at the wrong time and the wrong person at the right time. It's hard to get them both right.

Snakeblood

Micky Dolenz wrote: »

Yeah. How many times have you met the right person at the wrong time and the wrong person at the right time. It's hard to get them both right.

Dr. John?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ct4sVVqeoUE

Snakeblood

Millicent wrote: »

Listen, there's no such thing as afraid of a relationship/afraid of commitment in the early stages. It's bollox psychobabble that's pedalled out to make women feel better. If he likes you, he will want to ride you/see you/ speak to you on a regular basis. If not, he doesn't really like you all that much.

I wish people would stop buying into this shit. If he's not texting or calling, treating you badly or seems like he doesn't want a relationship, he does not want you. End of. It may sound cruel but if he liked you, you'd be in no doubt. Why would you want to be with someone who didn't seem to want to be with you anyway?

I don't think that's necessarily true. I for instance, (used to) pinball all over the place before ringing someone. It's not making them wait or playing hard to get, it's nerves etc.

Which made me less of an amazing catch but it's not that I wasn't interested, it's that my confidence was all over the place, and I felt like people were out of my league.

G86

Micky Dolenz wrote: »

Yeah. How many times have you met the right person at the wrong time and the wrong person at the right time. It's hard to get them both right.

I used to disagree...now I'm not so sure. I used to(and sometimes still) have the idealistic few that if you really love someone enough then you'll make it work, regardless of anything else that's going on. But, past experiences have shown me that that's not always the case, sometimes you have to look at the bigger picture.

I do agree with Millicents post with regards to the early stages though, if I started seeing someone and they weren't interested in making an effort at that stage, then I'd just assume they weren't interested full stop. It doesn't matter how much you like someone, you can't 'make' them interested, and you shouldn't have to try. Chemistry should hit you hard, it should give you butterflies, make your heart race, and put you on edge just waiting on the phone to ring. Every text should make you smile, and their funny jokes should make you laugh...even when they're not really funny! And - it should be mutual. He should WANT to call you, WANT to talk to you, and WANT to make an effort. In fact, making an effort shouldn't even seem like 'making an effort', because when you like someone it's just natural!