What was your parents' direst threat?

AskMyChocolate

Okay, so it tends to be a version of " Just wait 'til I get you home."

But what was the variation in your house ?

In our house, it was:

1) " If I have to come up those stairs and I tell ye, there'll be wigs on the green"

2) "For two pins now, and I'll turn this car around, and nobody will be going anywhere."

and

3) *looks for copywrite symbol*

"I'll reach back there now in a minute and I don't care who I hit"*

*done while raising a finger off the steering wheel to salute the oncoming driver, and lighting a Players No.6*

So AHers. What were your parents' favourite threats?

Bobjims

One more word out of you and I'll get the wooden spoon!

mikemac

For me, +1 on the wooden spoon. Now that was to be feared

pragmatic1

"Wait till I tell your father".

louloubelle

Oh the dreaded wooden spoon in our house too:D

PeterIanStaker

"Do you want to go back to the cellar with your brothers and sisters?"

lil'bug

it was a plastic spoon in our house used to sting like a motherfcuker

redz11

The wooden spoon. Always that dreaded wooden spoon.

And it wasn't just a threat either!

Xivilai

"I'll break your ****ing neck"

AnonoBoy

"If you tell anyone what happened to your grandmother you'll join her under the patio."

Lockstep

I hated that wooden spoon. It seems to be a uniquely Irish method of keeping kids in line.

mahamageehad

"If you fall off that tree and break both your legs don't come running back to me to cry coz i warned ya"

Cupcake_Crisis

"If you don't get up and clean your room I'm hiding the modem!!"

Worked every time...

stevejr

Stop that crying or I'll really give ya something to winge about...

strobe

My parents didn't believe in threats, it gave up the element of surprise.

rednik

Off to boarding school with ya.

rachaelf750

Rite no supper for you!

Mint Sauce

'I'll buy a cat o' nine tails'

Turtyturd

Just wait til your Da gets back...I was 21 before I realised he was never coming back.

CitizenKeane

It was usually just an order, it was the implied threat that did it!

Usually "Get up those stairs!" or "Get into bed this minute"

efb

I don't care who started it, I'll finish it...

Ghetto Cornetto

"I'll dance on ye."

Up-n-atom!

Too many to remember. If we didn't eat our dinner we'd get the whole 'if you don't finish that I'll put you in a box and post you to Africa'. This also worked for anything that we were 'ungrateful' for like if we were bad and we'd just got something shiny and new.

The wooden spoon was a big thing too. If we'd done something really bad (like break something or clatter a sibling) we'd go and hide, and then be told that if we came out, nothing would happen to us. Needless to day, I don't think she ever kept her word.

My mam is a lovely woman:p

AskMyChocolate

Xivilai wrote: »

"I'll If youbreak your ****ing neck don't come running to me"

ayp* ( a is for amended)

AskMyChocolate

lil'bug wrote: »

it was a plastic spoon in our house used to sting like a motherfcuker

Spoilt rotten.

*spoilt pronounced spylte*:p

Screaminmidget

rednik wrote: »

Off to boarding school with ya.

This.

Or:
"you saw what happened to the last guy who got thick with me"

EverEvolving

"I'll get the sally rod"

Never quite knew what it was but I presumed it was a stick of some sort!

Nolimits

I used to get threatened with the belt, often threatened, never used, I must ask my dad one day if he actually would have.....

Chris P. Bacon

If you keep that up im sending you to the good shepherds...(people from Waterford will know what im talking about):)

bronte

Twas the wooden spoon in our house...often threatened, never actually used.
My mammy is a Home Ec teacher and had about 5 wooden spoons that she never could find because we would hide them on her.

My name is URL

Almost every car journey included the "I'll turn this car around right now" threat.

LambsEye

My mom would ALWAYS threaten us with the wooden spoon. Until I hid it, I knew it was gone, she knew it was gone but neither one could stand down. So she'd pretend to rattle the drawer, getting the spoon and I'd pretend to be scared.

She started using the spatula then.

Also: "I'll brain you"

Also: (When my Mam wanted to emotionally scar us) "I'll leave now and I'll go up the mountain at Ballyhooly and you won't see me again."

Duffy the Vampire Slayer

Its only in the last two years or so I've heard of these supposedly common wooden spoon beatings. I often got a slap as a child but by a bare hand not a spoon.

Ruu_Old

The wooden spoon or stopping at the side of the road for a sally rod!

HoneyRyder

The Stealth Pinch during mass was a favourite of my Mum's

admiralofthefleet

when i was bold i was told 'keep that up and you'll go to the home'

Mint Sauce

I threatened once to move out and live with my Dad. Was told to have the bags packed next time I said it.

Never did say it again.

Red Hand

LambsEye wrote: »

My mom would ALWAYS threaten us with the wooden spoon. Until I hid it, I knew it was gone, she knew it was gone but neither one could stand down. So she'd pretend to rattle the drawer, getting the spoon and I'd pretend to be scared.

She started using the spatula then.

Also: "I'll brain you"

Also: (When my Mam wanted to emotionally scar us) "I'll leave now and I'll go up the mountain at Ballyhooly and you won't see me again."

Ballyhooly's not that high. I think your mom was bluffing, personally.:pac:

My Mom's threats:

"I'll get the wooden spoon!"

"You'll get the hooby-gannett!"-I've literally no idea what this means...

"I'll take away the television and you'll never watch it again."

"You won't be going to town Saturday!"

danslevent

Jeremiah 16:1 wrote: »

Ballyhooly's not that high. I think your mom was bluffing, personally.:pac:

My Mom's threats:

"I'll get the wooden spoon!"

"You'll get the hooby-gannett!"-I've literally no idea what this means...

"I'll take away the television and you'll never watch it again."

"You won't be going to town Saturday!"

So American :P

My Mam would say, "I'll leave the house and get an apartment in town" when I was younger and would fight with my sisters. Empty, empty threats! :P

number10a

The wooden spoon of course!! Used to hide it alot. Once we tried breaking it - that was a really bad idea!!! Splinters and hard edges just make them worse.

Or we used to get threatened that my mam would walk into our classroom when we'd least expect it and annouce to everyone how bold we were. That was way worse than the wooden spoon.

Or being made to go live with my cousins down the street - they were raised quite strictly.

My nana's favourite was "Stay quiet or I'll put ya out to the dogs." We only ever had one dog and he was really small and lived inside.

LETHAL LADY

Ill wipe that smile off your face.:D

IvySlayer

I'll burst ya!

Alter-Ego

The wooden spoon of course. Always a threat, never used.

Another one was "I'll sell ya to the gypsies"

Red Hand

danslevent wrote: »

So American :P

My Mam would say, "I'll leave the house and get an apartment in town" when I was younger and would fight with my sisters. Empty, empty threats! :P

American???? Begorrah bejamey, a wisha, I'll wipe that thoolamarawn of a shmirk off your face, you young cheeky gossoon!

(Mom is what we were brought up with and we were rural. My Mom called her mother "Mom" as well. I think it's because in Irish, you say "A Mham" (pronounced "A vom/mom") when addressing your mother, and it has stuck around in English in parts of Ireland. IMO)

Giselle

I was never threatened with a wooden spoon or with a slap. My parents were into psychological warfare and would threaten me with their disappointment.

Like ''If you don't behave yourself while the visitors are here, I'll be very disappointed'' or ''If you don't have x and y done by the time I'm home, I'll be very disappointed''. It worked. I don't know why, but the thought of my parents being disappointed in me was devastating.

Galway K9

Alter-Ego wrote: »

The wooden spoon of course. Always a threat, never used.

Another one was "I'll sell ya to the gypsies"

lucky b*****d!

LambsEye

"I'm not mad, I'm just disappointed." Fuck off Mom. You're mad, I know you're mad, let's call a spade a spade.

Griffen262

Many wooden spoons were cut up and hid around our house...

Micky Dolenz

We'll send you back to the orphanage

Cruel bastards.

phasers

"If you don't stop that Ted will come and smother you"


(Remember Ted, from the Den? Yeah, him. When I was older the Ted family expanded, he had a wife and a load of little baby teds who all wanted to smother you)

Scarinae

If we were bickering in the car, my mum would tell us she'd dump us at the side of the road and drive off. She actually did this once to my sister, she only drove around the corner but the point was made!