Responsible Parenting: Dad turns in own kids for bullying.

HenryChinaski

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2KxI8cNJIJU

MagicSean

Stinicker wrote: »

I hope he doesn't need to depend on them when he gets older.

Blood is thicker than water and I would always always defend my own, no matter how wrong they were.

That's what's wrong with a lot of this country. **** parenting. Kids growing up with no morals or sense of responsibility.

mfceiling

Stinicker wrote: »

I myself was severely bullied as a child in school, physically, emotionally and socially. This was quite a while ago, I see my former tormentors regularly and I think they are being punished on an almost daily for it, not by me but how their lifes turned out.

As a result of my own bullying I was no angel and had many a scuffle against said bullies, with my own father teaching me some boxing from his own days as a youth boxer, a cracked cheek bone for my main bully and me learning to fight back quickly resolved my bullying problem.

I do still think it is a problem that a father would take his own children to the police, there is something almost hard-wired into us to protect our own and if your own father hasn't got your back then it is pretty messed up.

Yeah.....when i was 17 and i'd just broken a 13 year old's jaw along with my sibling i could see my dad "having my back"

walshb

This story is nice to hear; at least it does tell us that some people do still have two very important traits, shame and decency.

amacachi

Stinicker wrote: »

I hope he doesn't need to depend on them when he gets older.

Blood is thicker than water and I would always always defend my own, no matter how wrong they were.

What if one of them was in the process of raping you?

walshb

Blood is thicker than water, but if you have an evil son or daughter, then society needs protecting. You are part of the problem too then, if you defend their evil actions. Defending them doesn't do any good for them in the long run. It just condones their behaviour, and actually encourages future evil acts.

whydoibother?

Fair play to him.

I think it's best to teach these lessons young. You can either stop a little bully in their tracks when they're a kid or you can let them grow up, do it in the workplace and let them face full adult consequences.

Tough love.

Electric Sheep

Stinicker wrote: »

I hope he doesn't need to depend on them when he gets older.

Blood is thicker than water and I would always always defend my own, no matter how wrong they were.

Why would you defend them for being wrong? Unless, of course, you feel that admitting they were wrong would be a bad reflection on yourself.

minidazzler

Stinicker wrote: »

I hope he doesn't need to depend on them when he gets older.

Blood is thicker than water and I would always always defend my own, no matter how wrong they were.

Typical against the grain response I hope? If you would defend your kids who act like scrotes, that makes you a terrible parent.

Mardy Bum

Stinicker wrote: »

I hope he doesn't need to depend on them when he gets older.

Blood is thicker than water and I would always always defend my own, no matter how wrong they were.

This is the kind of sh*t that has schools in this country destroyed. Drugs dealers, bullies, idiots have free run because their parents are clueless, deluded individuals.

bette

Einhard wrote: »

I don't really agree with this to be honest, and I think the father may well regret his actions. Sure, the punks needed to be punished, and taught a lesson, but they face the possibility now of criminal convictions, and a record which may hinder their chances of obtaining employment for years to come.

They face a criminal conviction because...

...they committed a crime.

Tar.Aldarion

Proper order too, my hope-i-never-have children would get the same.

RachaelVO

That father needs to be applauded. I would be devastated if my kids were bullies, and they could be, but jesus I hope not.

That 17 year old is a MAN and the 13 is just a child, and he got his jaw broken??? Jesus wept, both sets of parents must be distraught. You don't expect your 13 year old to come home with a broken jaw just for wearing glasses, and you most certainly don't expect your children to be the culprits.

The award for a very brave parenting decision goes to that man!

Chaotic_Forces

RachaelVO wrote: »

That father needs to be applauded. I would be devastated if my kids were bullies, and they could be, but jesus I hope not.

That 17 year old is a MAN and the 13 is just a child, and he got his jaw broken??? Jesus wept, both sets of parents must be distraught. You don't expect your 13 year old to come home with a broken jaw just for wearing glasses, and you most certainly don't expect your children to be the culprits.

The award for a very brave parenting decision goes to that man!

In fairness, I was 5'3 at the age of 17 and I could name some 13 year olds that were six foot.

But regardless of the size difference; he's an adult essentially and should have taken the blame and knowing better. So I agree with you.

I do think everyone might have gotten the wrong idea of having his back or standing by him. It's one thing to say "yes, he's my son and I will stand by him but he should be punished", you are still technically standing by him/having his back.

walshb

Chaotic_Forces wrote: »

In fairness, I was 5'3 at the age of 17 and I could name some 13 year olds that were six foot.

But regardless of the size difference; he's an adult essentially and should have taken the blame and knowing better. So I agree with you.

Did the article mention the size of the children?

I would say for every case of a 13 year old being bigger than a 17 year old, there are 100 cases of the reverse.

Chaotic_Forces

walshb wrote: »

Did the article mention the size of the children?

I would say for every case of a 13 year old being bigger than a 17 year old, there are 100 cases of the reverse.

Eh, I was just stating that even if the younger child was bigger it wouldn't have mattered. He's a child comapred to an adult.

DubK

You have to applaud the father here. If he had not taken these kids to the police then a few hours later there would have been a police car in his drive taking them out in handcuffs.

As a father myself I have been in the reverse situation where my son was bullied by an older child on the road where we live and whom attended the same school. After many attempts from my wife to talk to the bully and his parents about the situation which had included incidents of assault and theft the final straw was when my wife once again approached the child’s father and he actually laughed in her face and closed the door.

After months of receiving calls in work from a very distraught wife over what was going on and facing a situation where my son had now refused to play outside the house I finally acted, I approached the kid and told him that if he touched my son again I would kill him. This was just verbal I did not get out of the car and I most certainly did not in any way touch the child.

His parents called the police and reported me!!!!!!!!!!!

They refused to acknowledge the fact that they were raising a little scumbag that terrorised the younger children on the road and in the school. When you are dealing with parents like this these kids have no chance. When I spoke to the police that arrived to my house, one of them told me that he totally understood the situation but that I should have approached them to report him. I personally wouldn’t do this on anyone. I didn’t want him labelled as a trouble maker I just wanted his parents to step up and when they failed I stepped in. The kicker in all this was that the Garda that called up to me finished the conversation by telling me that he had spoken to the kid and that he was convinced that he was a little scumbag and that he had no doubt whatsoever that they would be dealing with him on a regular basis.

My point here is that parenting has a huge roll to play in how a child behaves. If the parents refuse to accept what is happening right in front of their eyes and continue to allow it continue then there is no possibility that the child can ever develop into a rounded adult. Some parents will simply blindly stand behind their child who in turn will never learn to face their responsibilities usually until it is to late.

What this father has done is to ensure that his children now really understand that there are real consequence for their actions. He had obviously spoken to them about this before as they had already been in trouble for it and as all too often happens with teens his advice, warnings, whatever was just ignored. Now his children have to face the fact that had they listened to him the first time they would not be in this situation. It is far harder to do the right thing by your children and teach them right from wrong then it is to ignore the situation and hope that it all goes away.

positron

Thanks for sharing your story DubK, I suppose the moral of the story is that you shouldn't worry about a scumbag kid's future - especially when that's at the cost of your own child. Report them, and report them every single time! You might be doing a huge favour to many others too!

Like I said in the first post, I totally admire that father for taking his kids to the police and holding them responsible for their actions. I believe he was actually being kind and generous to them by showing them the right way - and helping them for life, hopefully.

However, fathers like the one in this story are few and far in between. I think we should have a system where parents should be held responsible for childrens actions to a certain degree. A child gets treated lightly for his crimes on the basis that he's a minor, which is fair, but that isn't proper justice to the victim in my books. The rest of the punishment should go to the parent. This is the ONLY way to stop scumbag parents producing scumbag kids and letting them terrorising the towns and villages around the country.

Chaotic_Forces

positron wrote: »

Thanks for sharing your story DubK, I suppose the moral of the story is that you shouldn't worry about a scumbag kid's future - especially when that's at the cost of your own child. Report them, and report them every single time! You might be doing a huge favour to many others too!

Like I said in the first post, I totally admire that father for taking his kids to the police and holding them responsible for their actions. I believe he was actually being kind and generous to them by showing them the right way - and helping them for life, hopefully.

However, fathers like the one in this story are few and far in between. I think we should have a system where parents should be held responsible for childrens actions to a certain degree. A child gets treated lightly for his crimes on the basis that he's a minor, which is fair, but that isn't proper justice to the victim in my books. The rest of the punishment should go to the parent. This is the ONLY way to stop scumbag parents producing scumbag kids and letting them terrorising the towns and villages around the country.

I have to admit you are right with the bolded part.

It's actually disturbing at how horrible some parents can be. We talk about how little Billy down the road was beaten daily for doing something wrong and how horrible his parents are to him and they shouldn't be let near children. But what about when little Billy beats kids up and his parents don't care?

However, at times, a parent can do pretty much everything beyond calling the police or using violence and they shouldn't be punished if their kids are little terrors.

Liam Byrne

Stinicker wrote: »

I hope he doesn't need to depend on them when he gets older.

Blood is thicker than water and I would always always defend my own, no matter how wrong they were.

Can't disagree more.

If someone crosses the line of acceptability, cut them loose.

I'd hate to rely on pricks like those kids, and if left unchecked the cash they'd support him with would be robbed from someone else they bullied.

Fair play to the guy.

RachaelVO

Chaotic_Forces wrote: »

In fairness, I was 5'3 at the age of 17 and I could name some 13 year olds that were six foot.

But regardless of the size difference; he's an adult essentially and should have taken the blame and knowing better. So I agree with you.

I do think everyone might have gotten the wrong idea of having his back or standing by him. It's one thing to say "yes, he's my son and I will stand by him but he should be punished", you are still technically standing by him/having his back.

I agree either way, he is standing by his kids, but he is teaching them a valuable lesson. For everything you do there is a consequece or reward.

I'd like to think I'd make the same decision, but who knows. They both should be punished, but I have two young kids, and I would die if they were bullys.

Chaotic_Forces

RachaelVO wrote: »

I agree either way, he is standing by his kids, but he is teaching them a valuable lesson. For everything you do there is a consequece or reward.

I'd like to think I'd make the same decision, but who knows. They both should be punished, but I have two young kids, and I would die if they were bullys.

But let's say they did bully someone (I honestly hope they do not), you may punish them, they may complain but you won't abandon them, right? That's what that man did. He did all he could but by going to the police himself, he did not just the "right thing" but also, he stood by his kids. It is much more of a parental gesture (I don't really know how else to try to explain that) to say "you did wrong, I will go to the police with you, yes I may yell at you, I may see the police yell at you and I may punish you as much as possible as I see fit but you are still my children". I honestly think he is standing by them but without tolerating what they did. He's being both a good parent and a stern but fair one, which is ideal to me.

RachaelVO

Chaotic_Forces wrote: »

But let's say they did bully someone (I honestly hope they do not), you may punish them, they may complain but you won't abandon them, right? That's what that man did. He did all he could but by going to the police himself, he did not just the "right thing" but also, he stood by his kids. It is much more of a parental gesture (I don't really know how else to try to explain that) to say "you did wrong, I will go to the police with you, yes I may yell at you, I may see the police yell at you and I may punish you as much as possible as I see fit but you are still my children". I honestly think he is standing by them but without tolerating what they did. He's being both a good parent and a stern but fair one, which is ideal to me.

I think he is standing by his kids. He's trying to ensure that they learn a lesson. They broke the kids jaw, and that is assault not question of it. It's really up to the parents of the 13 year old as the whether they drop the charges or not.

I really hope my kids don't turn into bullies. I think I would make them at the very least stand up and be counted, and make them take responsibility for their actions, which is what this father is trying to do. Would I see them being prosecuted. I just don't know I'd be torn apart.

Having said that, my cousin has older children, and they are nice adults now, but as teenagers they were messers. Not bullys now, but messers and they both stole money on her and their grandmother (my aunt). She called the local garda station and told them she wanted to teach them a lesson. She marched them down to the station, got them put into a question room for a half hour and they were sh1tting it. It taught them a lesson the NEVER forgot. It's not exactly the same, but it worked!

Azureus

There is nothing worse than blindly defending your children at the expense of others imo, fair play to that father! Takes more guts to do that and face up to your kids actions that it does to stand by them and pretend their angels.

My brother was badly bullied as a teenager, by somebody we knew. My mother went to his parents multiple times asking them to please do something about it and all she ever got was 'Oh my billy* would Never do a thing like that!', even to the extent of making excuses for him and giving him alibies. Now that guy is a drug dealer and the scum of the earth, didnt do him any favours.

Hopefully this will be the kick up the ass these kids needed (though to be honest at their age its probably more the car/horse being taken off them that will bother them rather than the possibility of a criminal record). This not only taught those kids a lesson, but could well teach many parents a lesson too-its OK not to blindly stand by someobody just because ''blood is thicker than water''