How much money for....

LegacyUser

How much money is expected for neice/nephew/godchild 21st birthday these days.

Also for neice confirmation


bearing in mind one of us out of work and not much money spare ie no holidays etc for forseeable future......kind of a difficult situation

January

It's all subjective, give as much as you can afford in a card and they'll be delighted with it.

Ayla

The crucial word here is gift. It's what you feel appropriate given your relationship to the recipient and what you're able & wanting to do.

If your family's not able to give as much as you would want right now, everyone understands - it's a common thread in many families right now, and to expect you to pay up when it may mean sacrificing groceries/daily neccessities for your family is ridiculous!

Do something instead. If you feel close enough to the person to warrant a gift, then do something with them instead of giving a gift. I know it's not the norm, but the norm is changing these days. Take them out for a coffee, a movie...spend time with them instead of money on them.

Daisy M

I agree with the others you should only give what you can EASILY afford. I would hope that your neices and nephews would place more value on their relationship with you than what materialistic gifts you provide. If you have access to lots of their childhood photos you could consider putting together an album from birth to adulthood. Or have a look on photobox.ie they do great personalised mugs and the like you could have a baby photo on one side and a current photo on the other.

Overature

considering im 21 in a few months, id say anything over 1000 is perfect

LegacyUser

Overature wrote: »

considering im 21 in a few months, id say anything over 1000 is perfect

thanks.......very helpful of you

LegacyUser

Thanks guys

unfortunately these things cause a lot of grief in our house right now. i think we should cool it altogether as we have loads of nieces and nephews and are pretty much expected to buy for them all. OH does not agree whatsoever! and still thinks we should be giving at least €100 to the 21st person.(now when we were both working thats probably that fine)

funny thing is we have no kids of our own as we cant afford the ivf required now.

I kinda feel like the whole niece and nephew thing is after getting to be one big racket and it drives me mad. I feel bad i am in this position but feel worse that we cannot agree that we just need to cool it.

Doing something with them is a good idea, they are in a different country unfortunately! I have no access to their photos either.

Any other ideas?

Toots

I'm sorry but your OH needs to cop on, if you can't afford to be giving €100+ to the nieces and nephews then putting yourself under pressure to do so is madness. I used to have similar arguments with my husband about christmas presents for his family. They all used to put money in to get a gift for the parents and they used to spend crazy amounts of money (like everyone was asked to put in €200-€300). It drove me mad because we just couldn't afford it. In the end I said we'd get our own presents and I put a strict limit on what we could spend. Luckily they seem to have scaled back a bit in recent years.

As regards your nieces and nephews living in other countries, what countries do they live in? Depending on the currency, you could get some of their currency which would be a higher amount than the euro amount. Or else, for the nieces could you get them a neclace or bracelet or something and post it over?

lee4892

I got a beautiful silver frame from my Aunt and Uncle for my 21st and I used it to put my 21st Birthday photo into. I think thoughtful gifts such as that means more than money. These go for as little as E10 in shops nowadays but mean more than anything.:D

Also for the communions/confos coming up, another uncle bought me a 9ct gold ring with white 'diamond' in argos (can be bought for as little as E15 now) and I thought that was a great gift and can be reused as the child grows

cee_jay

For my communion, my aunt bought me a silver chain with a cross on it - I still have the pendant cross 20 years later. Means a lot more than any money I got which was quickly spent on what I don't know.

Sleepy

The only 21st birthday present I can remember getting at this point (a decade later) is the Claddagh Ring engraved Zippo lighter a cousin bought for me. Still have it, use it daily and cherish the little piece of Galway (home) I carry no matter where I go. Couldn't have cost her more than twenty euro or so but one of the best presents I've ever been given.

A thoughtful present will trump an expensive one for all but the most ignorant of individuals.

Overature

how much wrote: »

thanks.......very helpful of you

sorry, i normally get about €20 for my birthdays, which is think is reasonable

Moonbeam

21 euro for a 21st birthday is very common.

I am trying to remember presents that I got and the ones I can easily remember are -
Someone gave me a nice pair of pjs and nice smelly stuff.
The Jewellery
Clothes vouchers
can't remember the rest.

lonestargirl

If there are a good few aunts and uncles would you consider going together to get a bigger present. I love to cook and bake and I got a Kenwood chef from mine for my 21st- it would have cost them about E24 each. I use it every couple of days and makes me think of them.

Daisy M

Also just to add pandora charm bracelets are very popular among girls and young women alike, check if any of them own one and you could consider getting a charm for it cost starts around 22e and up to anything.

I'm due to turn 21 in October, and to be honest, if I got anything over 50euro I'd feel embarrassed. 100 is WAY too much.

I haven't gotten birthday money off my aunties since I was 18, by this stage I'm far from the youngest in the family and it would be ridiculous if everyone was buying all the kids birthday gifts past the age of 18. If I was to get money, I'd expect 20 quid, or if it was a present I wouldn't care if it was cheap as chips. To be honest, if it's a 21st, the birthday person will probably be getting locked and by the next day wont even remember how much you gave them. Even if I'm sober, to be honest I rarely remember the quantity of money gifts.

As for the confirmation, that's a tricky one. On the one hand, a lot of kids get outrageous amounts of money, but on the other hand, they don't understand the value of it. Confirmation should be less than communion I'd say. I remember for my communion I got 120 pounds in total and I thought I was rich!

Certainly for either one, 50 would be generous, any more than that is too much.

LegacyUser

Thank you all for those ideas and responses.

I just figured we have 4no. 21st birthdays coming in the next year!!!!!!! All male nephews including a godchild!!!
I find it a lot harder to buy for guys, in getting something meaningful, and asking them all they want si the money. For a present I would like to get them something they would always have like some of you suggested. But what to get for guys??? none of them smoke, otherwise zippo is a good plan.
A present as opposed to money is a better idea I think.

chains and jewellery are only really for girls I think are they? its all boys for the confirmations and 21sts; girls for communion and 18th's.

I have a bigggggggg family

Toots* thanks. sometimes the whole situation is just overwhelming. they are all in Euro countries.

Sleepy

Leatherman, Swiss Army Knife, Zippos are still cool even if you don't smoke yourself, Straight Edge Razor, Hip Flask, Wallet, decent bottle of whiskey (i.e. one of the http://www.cooleywhiskey.com/ range or a single malt scotch)...

All good "coming of age" presents for a guy.

zoby

I have always stuck by the €21 for a 21st


For a present what about a slogan t-shirt - hairy baby has some great ones they are about €30 but sometimes Pennys have some pretty decent T's for under a tenner



For communions my kids got some cinema vouchers and they loved them but for confirmation its money all the way

pickarooney

You might get some good suggestions in Gift Ideas.

Personally I would have been well pleased with a bottle of whiskey or good tequila (for my 21st, for the confirmation €20 or so).