Dumb/Great Facebook Status {merge} [No Names]

MonkstownHoop

I oppose the water charges myself but if I see another 'Dave notpayingthewatercharges Murphy' I might support it

Generic Dreadhead

What horses**t, sorry for bad resolution, couldn't find the "original" version of this scientific find.

http://i.imgur.com/Eyn6AA2.jpg?1

shruikan2553

Cormac... wrote: »

What horses**t, sorry for bad resolution, couldn't find the "original" version of this scientific find.

http://i.imgur.com/Eyn6AA2.jpg?1

Scientology are getting involved :pac:

PandaPoo

Girl posts picture of ultrasound scan. Says she's 12 weeks pregnant.
"together 4 months with the love of me life"

Her boyfriend 'ah are little pride n joy. Love you both so much'
Her 'we love you twice as much babe'
Him 'not possible, best 4 months of me life. Love you 2 way more xxxx'

Edit, there's more.
Her 'so small xxxx'
Him ' i know so cute babe xxxxx'

El Weirdo

PandaPoo wrote: »

Girl posts picture of ultrasound scan. Says she's 12 weeks pregnant.
"together 4 months with the love of me life"

Her boyfriend 'ah are little pride n joy. Love you both so much'
Her 'we love you twice as much babe'
Him 'not possible, best 4 months of me life. Love you 2 way more xxxx'

Edit, there's more.
Her 'so small xxxx'
Him ' i know so cute babe xxxxx'

If that isn't enough to turn a Youth Defence supporter pro-choice, I don't know what is.

Lisha

PandaPoo wrote: »

Girl posts picture of ultrasound scan. Says she's 12 weeks pregnant.
"together 4 months with the love of me life"

Her boyfriend 'ah are little pride n joy. Love you both so much'
Her 'we love you twice as much babe'
Him 'not possible, best 4 months of me life. Love you 2 way more xxxx'

Edit, there's more.
Her 'so small xxxx'
Him ' i know so cute babe xxxxx'

4months....

Saralee4

Lisha wrote: »

4months....

In fairness it's been the best 4 months of his life :-p

Taylor365

Saralee4 wrote: »

In fairness it's been the best 4 months of his life :-p

Sounds like the 1st month was the best...

Miall108

Goin rippin d beer ou it 2ni. Boom!!!

coolhull

Miall108 wrote: »

Goin rippin d beer ou it 2ni. Boom!!!

Boom, indeed.....

PandaPoo

Lisha wrote: »

4months....

They're 18, and always cringy like this. I feel like telling them they look like spas but that won't end well for me.

fussyonion

"Stop sendin me Candy Crush requests people I have not got the time or the patence!"
This girl goes on to splash her whole FB wall with Farmville posts.

XxMCRxBabyxX

fussyonion wrote: »

"Stop sendin me Candy Crush requests people I have not got the time or the patence!"
This girl goes on to splash her whole FB wall with Farmville posts.

I didn't think Farmville still existed?!

fussyonion

XxMCRxBabyxX wrote: »

I didn't think Farmville still existed?!

Unfortunately it does and what irritates the hell out of me is this girl plays it constantly..she posts things from it all the time and is always inviting me to play.
I've now hidden the blasted game from my timeline.

El Weirdo

XxMCRxBabyxX wrote: »

I didn't think Farmville still existed?!

That post is clearly from near the beginning of this thread and has been served up in error by the hamsters as we're getting close to the 10k post limit for the thread.

GAAman

PandaPoo wrote: »

They're 18, and always cringy like this. I feel like telling them they look like spas but that won't end well for me.

Don't worry, it won't end well for them either!

Digital Solitude

PandaPoo wrote: »

They're 18, and always cringy like this. I feel like telling them they look like spas but that won't end well for me.

Make sure to reply to the shotgun wedding event on Facebook! Or kick up a fuss if you're not invited

the_monkey

El Weirdo wrote: »

If that isn't enough to turn a Youth Defence supporter pro-choice, I don't know what is.

Post of the year !!!

PandaPoo

Digital Solitude wrote: »

Make sure to reply to the shotgun wedding event on Facebook! Or kick up a fuss if you're not invited

Oh I'll be invited.. He's my brother

XxMCRxBabyxX

PandaPoo wrote: »

Oh I'll be invited.. He's my brother

That is a brave thing to admit to!

PandaPoo

XxMCRxBabyxX wrote: »

That is a brave thing to admit to!

I should add that I was fostered out of that family as an infant and only reconnected with them recently.

I always say child abuse was the best thing that ever happened to me

brandnewaward

PandaPoo wrote: »

I should add that I was fostered out of that family as an infant and only reconnected with them recently.

I always say child abuse was the best thing that ever happened to me

probably a post never to be repeated again

PandaPoo

brandnewaward wrote: »

probably a post never to be repeated again

I should add that I was fostered out of that family as an infant and only reconnected with them recently.

I always say child abuse was the best thing that ever happened to me

WoollyRedHat

fussyonion wrote: »

Unfortunately it does and what irritates the hell out of me is this girl plays it constantly..she posts things from it all the time and is always inviting me to play.
I've now hidden the blasted game from my timeline.

I never got into the whole farmville thing, I sure as hell didn't like being on real farms so why would I want to spend my time on a virtual one. Know where you're coming from with the invites, I have one or two people that are relentless with the candy crush invites. I WILL NOT PLAY WITH YOU!!

_Whimsical_

A girl who likes to post a lot about the evils of facebook and people who seek attention on it starts posting "glad to be alive today", "life is so precious", "your health is all that matters, never take it for granted" etc with the location of "posted from x hospital in Dublin". Suddenly there's loads of "oh no, are you sick/in hospital/ok?" posts.
She ignores all questions,silence seems to speak volumes but worrying status updates continue alluding to something serious afoot.
More concern floods in and messages of "please answer your phone if you can", "please text me and just let me know your ok" start.

Next day she obviously thought she would ramp up the concern with some apt quotes hinting at her health distress but instead at 2 hour intervals she posted links to google search pages for things like "inspirational quotes on being in hospital" ," inspirational quotes on being sick" and eventually "inspirational quotes on leaving hospital". So instead of some worrying enigmatic quote posts everyone got links to search page with the query typed in.

She was fine too, it was just a small procedure on a foot,nothing went wrong, but it was spun like a viral PR campaign.

RainyDay

WoollyRedHat wrote: »

I never got into the whole farmville thing, I sure as hell didn't like being on real farms so why would I want to spend my time on a virtual one. Know where you're coming from with the invites, I have one or two people that are relentless with the candy crush invites. I WILL NOT PLAY WITH YOU!!

Use the Hide option, and you'll never see a Farmville invite again. Once you hide invites from any particular game once, they won't appear again.

Rubberlegs

"Just taking our poor little man into the emergency doc". And yet you have time to stop and post it on Facebook. I suspect our poor little man has feck all seriously wrong with him, and this is yet another cry for sympathy and attention from parents who play their lives out like a reality show

Taylor365

73Cat wrote: »

"Just taking our poor little man into the emergency doc". And yet you have time to stop and post it on Facebook. I suspect our poor little man has feck all seriously wrong with him, and this is yet another cry for sympathy and attention from parents who play their lives out like a reality show

I always wonder, what exactly is missing.

What gap are they trying to fill, what chemical are they trying to release in their brains. Trying to get their 15 minutes of 'u ok hun?'

vangoz

Oh the joys of growing up in Tallaght. I'm not on facebook, but friends do share some gems on Viber. I'll post more tomorrow.

Kovu

^^ I had to read that last one a few times to cop on that they weren't asking to smell a granny.

PandaPoo

Kovu wrote: »

^^ I had to read that last one a few times to cop on that they weren't asking to smell a granny.

I thought for a minute they were going to the grand canyon.

eternal

I never have anything to add to this thread but saw this today. Some of the comments are hilarious:

'Christians Against Drugs
Masturbation is a sin. Self-sexing is not only bad for your physical and mental health, but also destroys your spiritual wellbeing. If you ring the devil's doorbell, Satan will open up Hell's gates and drag you in! The same principle also applies to men: if you touch your sin stick, you are buying a one way ticket to the fiery inferno. Take the pledge to be pure in body and mind TODAY!!'

rawn

eternal wrote: »

if you touch your sin stick

:pac: :pac: :pac:

Lollipops23

eternal wrote: »

Masturbation is a sin. Self-sexing is not only bad for your physical and mental health, but also destroys your spiritual wellbeing. If you ring the devil's doorbell, Satan will open up Hell's gates and drag you in! The same principle also applies to men: if you touch your sin stick, you are buying a one way ticket to the fiery inferno. Take the pledge to be pure in body and mind TODAY!!'

Reminds me of The Loophole by Garfunkel and Oates.

eternal

Lollipops23 wrote: »

Reminds me of The Loophole by Garfunkel and Oates.

I just picture the clitoris going ding dong somehow.

Lollipops23

eternal wrote: »

I just picture the clitoris going ding dong somehow.

I play knick knacks on Satan all the time.

El Weirdo

eternal wrote: »

I just picture the clitoris going ding dong somehow.

I don't want to blow my own trumpet, but I've been known to make a clit go ding-dong once or twice in my time.

Inspector Coptoor

"Know many trust a few always paddle your own canoe"

R u ok Hun?

Etc, etc repeat ad nauseum

Toots

Inspector Coptoor wrote: »

"Know many trust a few always paddle your own canoe"

R u ok Hun?

Etc, etc repeat ad nauseum

You should reply with this

XxMCRxBabyxX

Taylor365 wrote: »

I always wonder, what exactly is missing.

What gap are they trying to fill, what chemical are they trying to release in their brains. Trying to get their 15 minutes of 'u ok hun?'

It can go very wrong

Ted_YNWA

It's called Münchausen syndrome by proxy at the extreme end of scale.

XxMCRxBabyxX

Ted_YNWA wrote: »

It's called Münchausen syndrome by proxy at the extreme end of scale.

All encouraged by Facebook and twitter support in this case. I'm shocked the poor child managed to make it to 5 tbh.

eternal

El Weirdo wrote: »

I don't want to blow my own trumpet, but I've been known to make a clit go ding-dong once or twice in my time.

http://i958.photobucket.com/albums/ae62/im_langers/clit%20joke_zpsp4a78p16.jpg

El Weirdo

eternal wrote: »

http://i958.photobucket.com/albums/ae62/im_langers/clit%20joke_zpsp4a78p16.jpg

Orly?

eternal

El Weirdo wrote: »

Orly?

Well I never.

BaZmO*

Ted_YNWA wrote: »

It's called Münchausen syndrome by proxy at the extreme end of scale.

Didn't Eminem's mother have that?

Un Croissant

Hey Guys OK I am giving full notice and writing this in advance that I will be completely coming off Facebook due to many reasons and mainly because I think its a toxic place to be on if you want to be in any professional career. So I am making the definite decision to come completely off. To my friends and family away from Ireland. My email address is XXXXXXXXXX and my mobile number is XXXXXXXX. I will be completely off this site within two days. Thanks for the experience but it leads to a lot of crap in the future.

Generic Dreadhead

Un Croissant wrote: »

Hey Guys OK I am giving full notice and writing this in advance that I will be completely coming off Facebook due to many reasons and mainly because I think its a toxic place to be on if you want to be in any professional career. So I am making the definite decision to come completely off. To my friends and family away from Ireland. My email address is XXXXXXXXXX and my mobile number is XXXXXXXX. I will be completely off this site within two days. Thanks for the experience but it leads to a lot of crap in the future.

Huh, a time traveller is amongst us.... anyway it was probably cr@p and drama they themselves created

Loughc

Un Croissant wrote: »

Hey Guys OK I am giving full notice and writing this in advance that I will be completely coming off Facebook due to many reasons and mainly because I think its a toxic place to be on if you want to be in any professional career. So I am making the definite decision to come completely off. To my friends and family away from Ireland. My email address is XXXXXXXXXX and my mobile number is XXXXXXXX. I will be completely off this site within two days. Thanks for the experience but it leads to a lot of crap in the future.

It's ironic as the length of notice he gave will prob last longer than the time he will stay off Facebook.

BaZmO*

Un Croissant wrote: »

Hey Guys OK I am giving full notice and writing this in advance that I will be completely coming off Facebook due to many reasons and mainly because I think its a toxic place to be on if you want to be in any professional career. So I am making the definite decision to come completely off. To my friends and family away from Ireland. My email address is XXXXXXXXXX and my mobile number is XXXXXXXX. I will be completely off this site within two days. Thanks for the experience but it leads to a lot of crap in the future.

Please keep us updated on their return.