Dumb/Great Facebook Status {merge} [No Names]

The King of Moo

SuperGrover wrote: »

Karl Pilkington

I thought it might've been a quote but had no luck finding evidence when googling it, due to the appalling spelling.

I think it says everything about this person when I can't distinguish her updates from Karl Pilkington quotes.

Memory Of 98

What's with some people not using commas, apostrophes, or fullstops. But, interestingly, finding the urgent need to capital every single word, or letter.

Memory Of 98

What's with some people not using commas, apostrophes, or fullstops. But, interestingly, finding the urgent need to capital every single word, or letter.

Ficheall

Memory Of 98 wrote: »

What's with some people not using commas, apostrophes, or fullstops.

...or question marks?

Memory Of 98 wrote: »

But, interestingly, finding the urgent need to capital every single word, or letter.

And starting a sentence with a conjunction is dodgy too.

Intensive Care Bear

"Today is such a mixed bag of emotions, my best friends dad who has been like a dad to me too is getting buried but on the other hand my outfit for next weekend has arrived and its hot " This cracked me up, the woman is nuts.

blacklilly

One of my "friends" is constantly updating her status.

She's turned into a serious fitness freak, resembles Jodie Marsh.

Anyway here is a taster of her intelligent, philosophical updates:

FML
Totally pounded some muscle in the gym
I love the gym
If you're fat and complaining, I don't wanna hear ya
Ugh I feel so fat today
Was getting my hair done earlier and the hairdresser was so fat that her stomach kept rubbing off me, made me sick
Haters be hating
If you've got something to say, say it to my face, hate jealous people

The above examples are usually written in incoherent abbreviations.
Every time I see one of her updates I consider deleting her but I've realised that these updates make me feel far superior and therefore she will remain a "friend"

Canis Lupus

blacklilly wrote: »

One of my "friends" is constantly updating her status.

She's turned into a serious fitness freak, resembles Jodie Marsh.

Anyway here is a taster of her intelligent, philosophical updates:

FML
Totally pounded some muscle in the gym
I love the gym
If you're fat and complaining, I don't wanna hear ya
Ugh I feel so fat today
Was getting my hair done earlier and the hairdresser was so fat that her stomach kept rubbing off me, made me sick
Haters be hating
If you've got something to say, say it to my face, hate jealous people

The above examples are usually written in incoherent abbreviations.
Every time I see one of her updates I consider deleting her but I've realised that these updates make me feel far superior and therefore she will remain a "friend"

Gymaholics shouldn't be allowed on FB imo.

Duggy747

I dunno why I check Facebook every now and again.

I last about 2 minutes before I do this and close the window.

CiaranK

Spotted this gem today

https://us.v-cdn.net/6034073/

Thwip!

CiaranK wrote: »

Spotted this gem today

https://us.v-cdn.net/6034073/

Not working

CiaranK

jpcarlow wrote: »

Not working

Here's another link for it, should work

http://cf.broadsheet.ie/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Screen-Shot-2012-07-11-at-15.27.59.jpg

Gummy Panda

CiaranK wrote: »

Here's another link for it, should work

http://cf.broadsheet.ie/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Screen-Shot-2012-07-11-at-15.27.59.jpg

haha culchie facebook. They love been bribed with offers of "being sound" and a 3-in-1 afterwards lol

danwhite88

batistuta9 wrote: »

how is this a dumb status?

The person who posted the status is a bloke

Thwip!

Any status that has the phrase "sure it would be a crime not to"

Actually just saw one that takes the f***in biscuit.

*Distressing picture of a lil baby in an ICU cot, various tubes and blood showing (i'm not linking it because it would upset a lot of people)*
underneath is the caption
"He has cancer, Facebook will donate 1 dollar for every SHARE. Hit SHARE button ♥ show your support ..♥ ;'("

We all know its a bunch of crap about FB donating (thats the usual crap people who post these things say) and some poor lil kid has his face plastered all over the web so some selfish c*nt can get shares on FB

cyrusdvirus

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Mauritius/7172188567

This is epically sad.
not just because of what the families involved have gone through, but how incredibly stupid people are

Brain Stroking

gatecrash wrote: »

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Mauritius/7172188567

This is epically sad.
not just because of what the families involved have gone through, but how incredibly stupid people are

I am losing faith in the irish people on an ever increasing level these days. Your post added to it

Mr Benevolent

Brain Stroking wrote: »

I am losing faith in the irish people on an ever increasing level these days. Your post added to it

You have no perspective.

Brain Stroking

Confab wrote: »

You have no perspective.

How so?

cyrusdvirus

Brain Stroking wrote: »

I am losing faith in the irish people on an ever increasing level these days. Your post added to it

You referring to the facebook page or something i said??

Brain Stroking

gatecrash wrote: »

You referring to the facebook page or something i said??

The comments on the facebook page. People these days dont seem to realise that once you say something online it is there indefinitely.

Plazaman

gatecrash wrote: »

This is epically sad.
not just because of what the families involved have gone through, but how incredibly stupid people are

Not at all, by making wildly outlandish statements via the internet to a country (well their Facebook page anyway), this will instantly fix everything including social injustices, dodgy police investigating procedures and theatrical defence lawyers.

AND, if you thank this post Bill Gates will give $1 towards the cost of building a fence around Mauritus so tourists can't get in and Mauritanians can't get out and realise that more foreign tourists have been attacked and/or killed in Ireland without even a mockutrial been held.

Love Jerh's post, doubt he's allowed out of the basement, never mind the country.

El_Dangeroso

For some reason that post reminds me of when Homer Simpson didn't write to movie stars, he wrote to movies.

Dear Mauritius, you suck! P.S. Do you know Sri Lanka?

Pedant

Brain Stroking wrote: »

The comments on the facebook page. People these days dont seem to realise that once you say something online it is there indefinitely.

You can delete comments on a facebook page.

Paddy Cow

Pedant wrote: »

You can delete comments on a facebook page.

Even if you delete it someone could already have made a screen shot of it and sent it round the internet. Deleting something is no guarantee that you've wiped it forever.

Brain Stroking

Pedant wrote: »

You can delete comments on a facebook page.

Surely you have seen the screenshots on this thread?

Jimmy Iovine

The posts that most annoy me are the ones that are about some contrived situation that results in 'my faith in humanity being restored'.

The worst offender is the one about the woman on the plane who refuses to sit beside the black man. I've seen this pop up about 20 times in the last few months. People must be real stupid to believe that this shít actually happened.

A 50- something year old white woman arrived at her seat on a crowded flight and immediately didn't want the seat. The seat was next to a black man. Disgusted, the woman immediately summoned the flight attendant and demanded a new seat. The woman said "I cannot sit here next to this black man." The fight attendant said "Let me see if I can find another seat." After checking, the flight attendant returned and stated "Ma'am, there are no more seats in economy, but I will check with the captain and see if there is something in first class." About 10 minutes went by and the flight attendant returned and stated "The captain has confirmed that there are no more seats in economy, but there is one in first class. It is our company policy to never move a person from economy to first class, but being that it would be some sort of scandal to force a person to sit next to an UNPLEASANT person, the captain agreed to make the switch to first class." Before the woman could say anything, the attendant gestured to the black man and said, "Therefore sir, if you would so kindly retrieve your personal items, we would like to move you to the comfort of first class as the captain doesn't want you to sit next to an unpleasant person." Passengers in the seats nearby began to applause while some gave a standing ovation.

Anita Blow

Saw a disgraceful one last week that really took the biscuit.
It was one of those stupid accounts that always has those "Like and X will donate X". It had a picture of the twin towers and said "Only 90s kids will remember this. Like in 3 seconds if you agree"

fasttalkerchat

CiaranK wrote: »

Here's another link for it, should work

http://cf.broadsheet.ie/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Screen-Shot-2012-07-11-at-15.27.59.jpg

Brilliant!
Was another lad wrote to her asking if she remembered giving him the ride and wanting to meet again.

NufcNavan

Alright, this whole phenomenon of "like for" etc. etc. is taking the piss. My fb feed is littered with sh*tty ass made up stories and sick children/animals, and the gullable idiots that are my 'friends' continuously 'like' these stupid fads. It's ridiculous almost to the point that fb is unscrollable.

It's a shame because fb is a great way to keep in touch with mates especially during the Summer months when you're a college. It's just a shame that there are so many idiots out there who genuinely believe that they are doing something right by liking a picture.

Pushtrak

http://a7.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash3/599395_399539720112106_1735246238_n.jpg

paddyandy

When Children are Friends with a Parent one is an Accomplice and both are Criminals .

Gummy Panda

Pushtrak wrote: »

http://a7.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash3/599395_399539720112106_1735246238_n.jpg

oh lords!! lol

boomkatalog

My 15 year old cousin has my home page spammed giving people 'OHs' which are apparently Honest Opinions. Hate that I can see all the tripe she posts on her friends pages when I'm not even friends with them.

"Steve yhoo r rlly sound. Sum lauf dwn the disco lst week lol. Luff yhoo 2k12 bbz etc etc"

Vomit.

Turtwig

boomkatalog wrote: »

My 15 year old cousin has my home page spammed giving people 'OHs' which are apparently Honest Opinions. Hate that I can see all the tripe she posts on her friends pages when I'm not even friends with them.

"Steve yhoo r rlly sound. Sum lauf dwn the disco lst week lol. Luff yhoo 2k12 bbz etc etc"

Vomit.

That's why we have restricted lists.

aca101

Looking at some of the comments on the Mauritius page, have to read it to believe the stupidity of some people. http://www.facebook.com/pages/Mauritius/7172188567

Check out the comments by "ella"....sounds like a complete numpty.

robbiezero

I like this status

"I am so great I do trx.why don't u hang ur bollix out of that yoke.nobody cares if u do trx."

robbiezero

aca101 wrote: »

Looking at some of the comments on the Mauritius page, have to read it to believe the stupidity of some people. http://www.facebook.com/pages/Mauritius/7172188567

Check out the comments by "ella"....sounds like a complete numpty.

I'd say that person is just winding people up.
I don't know which is worse on that page, the idiots attacking Mauritius or the awful righteous brigade tripping over themselves with their condemnation of the idiots.

sheesh

aca101 wrote: »

Looking at some of the comments on the Mauritius page, have to read it to believe the stupidity of some people. http://www.facebook.com/pages/Mauritius/7172188567

Check out the comments by "ella"....sounds like a complete numpty.

oh god its like every stupid person in the country is commenting on it.

Ormus

aca101 wrote: »

Looking at some of the comments on the Mauritius page, have to read it to believe the stupidity of some people. http://www.facebook.com/pages/Mauritius/7172188567

Check out the comments by "ella"....sounds like a complete numpty.

That is disturbing stuff. Not just Ella, droves and droves of other.....people.

batistuta9

can somebody posts screenshot's of the comments on the mauritius page

Dude111

I voted NO since im not (OR WONT EVER BE) on facebook!

Fluorescence

Dude111 wrote: »

I voted NO since im not (OR WONT EVER BE) on facebook!

You go, Dude. Fight the system. Facebook is sooooooo mainstream.

Memory Of 98

Has anyone heard of the "Dead baby jokes page," on Facebook?

Personally, I don't find the jokes funny, but some people do, and well, that's their right, and they have the right to. But, recently, scores of Irish chavs, who are unhappy, and want the page closed, have been swarming the site, posting horrendous messages, which are devoid of grammar, structure and common sense.
I'll share some crackers.

See u sick basters btw dae use no think boot aww the girls on this and on this world that has losed kids use need craw up in a corner in dead use aww need get a life in graw up us sad wee black fuks !!!

I wish i new who uz were ya ****in sick ppl i would kill u my self

You SCUM ON ####### EARTH, I hope god curses you you sick animal!!!!! I swear if I could see the person who made this page I would ####### beat the #### out of you till black and blue untill I see death!!!



hers a joke for you ***** what you call a guy with broken legs and arms and black and blue in there faces

---

you ****ers if i see any of you ***** on road side sick basters.

batistuta9

are these all women?

and the first comment is from a scottish person i think - irreverent though :pac:

Richard Hillman

International politics being tackled here

Was listening to fm104 and there was wat they think a sudiced bombing on a aer lingus bus in Bulgaria people died ****ing sick people out Der an now Der is Irish people stuck over Der y so sick people have to use Der sad minds on other people its just ****in wrong ya horrible *****

Sinfonia

Memory Of 98 wrote: »

Has anyone heard of the "Dead baby jokes page," on Facebook?

Personally, I don't find the jokes funny, but some people do, and well, that's their right, and they have the right to. But, recently, scores of Irish chavs, who are unhappy, and want the page closed, have been swarming the site, posting horrendous messages, which are devoid of grammar, structure and common sense.
I'll share some crackers.

See u sick basters btw dae use no think boot aww the girls on this and on this world that has losed kids use need craw up in a corner in dead use aww need get a life in graw up us sad wee black fuks !!!

I wish i new who uz were ya ****in sick ppl i would kill u my self

You SCUM ON ####### EARTH, I hope god curses you you sick animal!!!!! I swear if I could see the person who made this page I would ####### beat the #### out of you till black and blue untill I see death!!!



hers a joke for you ***** what you call a guy with broken legs and arms and black and blue in there faces

---

you ****ers if i see any of you ***** on road side sick basters.

Jesus, you'd swear they were giving out to people who were actually killing babies.

donalg1

Memory Of 98 wrote: »

Has anyone heard of the "Dead baby jokes page," on Facebook?

Personally, I don't find the jokes funny, but some people do, and well, that's their right, and they have the right to. But, recently, scores of Irish chavs, who are unhappy, and want the page closed, have been swarming the site, posting horrendous messages, which are devoid of grammar, structure and common sense.
I'll share some crackers.

See u sick basters btw dae use no think boot aww the girls on this and on this world that has losed kids use need craw up in a corner in dead use aww need get a life in graw up us sad wee black fuks !!!

I wish i new who uz were ya ****in sick ppl i would kill u my self

You SCUM ON ####### EARTH, I hope god curses you you sick animal!!!!! I swear if I could see the person who made this page I would ####### beat the #### out of you till black and blue untill I see death!!!



hers a joke for you ***** what you call a guy with broken legs and arms and black and blue in there faces

---

you ****ers if i see any of you ***** on road side sick basters.

Can someone translate this please.

Sinfonia

That Dead Baby Jokes page is actually so fascinating.
If it were just a group of like-minded people sharing the jokes, it'd be pretty boring; most of them aren't hilarious or anything, the best ones generally seem to be those that are actually having a poke at someone else, like the McDonald's one. Also the C&H comics are funny.

But it's actually the outraged people that make the page worth reading. And it causes me to laugh even when I see a not-amazingly-funny (but heavily 'offensive') picture or joke, because I can't wait to read the outraged comments.

Also, Memory of 98 was not lying; I have yet to see one outraged person employ any kind of decent standard of spelling, grammar or syntax.

Sonics2k

I actually liked the Dead Baby Jokes page simply to laugh at the rage people have about it.

Most of the jokes and pictures posted are the same kind you'd find on 9gag or so.

Memory Of 98

Sinfonia wrote: »

That Dead Baby Jokes page is actually so fascinating.
If it were just a group of like-minded people sharing the jokes, it'd be pretty boring; most of them aren't hilarious or anything, the best ones generally seem to be those that are actually having a poke at someone else, like the McDonald's one. Also the C&H comics are funny.

But it's actually the outraged people that make the page worth reading. And it causes me to laugh even when I see a not-amazingly-funny (but heavily 'offensive') picture or joke, because I can't wait to read the outraged comments.

Also, Memory of 98 was not lying; I have yet to see one outraged person employ any kind of decent standard of spelling, grammar or syntax.

Well you see, you have Emo kids, who like dead baby jokes. Keeping in mind that Emo and goth kids are usually very, very well educated.

Then, on the other side, you have scumbags and chavs who hate dead baby jokes, and they are not very well educated.


As the scumbag once said, "Im discustard at dis page."

Which makes for very interesting debate.
I don't need to say anymore, do I?