just found out pregnant but think about to be offered job

barbiegirl

Ok as the title says i've just found out we're pregnant. Our history is relebant as we've been trying for 3 years had 3 rounds of IUI, 2 pregnancies with early miscarriages and i have just been made redundant.
As soon as I knew about redundancy i started looking for a job and am now on 3rd interview for 1 particular role with a small but successful company. I am very unsure what to do as i can't afford not to work but also understand the ramifications of taking on someone for a small company only for them to leave on maternity. If it was a bigger company i wouldn't worry so much. Plus the commute would be 3 hours a day, not the best career move and so i am very unsure. But a job is a job though working in it there is a good chance i could get another one.
What do ye think tell them and let them decide knowing full facts, refuse the job and tell them why or take it and feel very guilty as i hide the pregnancy as long as possible?

bulmersgal

How fair along are you, I presume only a couple of weeks. I wouldn't tell them, i'd take the job. You only get jobseekers benefit for a year, if your not working you won't get maternity benefit unless your 16 weeks away from due date and then you could go on early maternity leave.

At the end of the day you have to think of yourself and your family. You've only just found out, what would you of done if you had accepted the job and then found out.

JDxtra

You may not get the job so say nothing in the interview. If they do offer it to you, say nothing until you are required to as per your contract. Your circumstances could change very easily so you should progress with your life as normal in this situation.

barbiegirl

You are both right I am only 4w 5d so very very early only that we've been on the ttc rollercoaster we probably wouldn't even know. We weren't on treatment this time and honesty though trying weren't expecting it to happen. It all could not work out, though this would break my heart. So i think yep I'll just keep going and use some of my redundancy to buy disguising work outfits. Plus I am very good at my job and will give 100% so they won't have problems there.
I do think if i posted this in the work forum i'd get a very different response.

Ayla

OP - I agree with others re: doing whatever you'd have done otherwise.


However:

"Maternity Benefit is paid by the Department of Social Protection to women who have a certain number of paid PRSI contributions on their social insurance record and who are in insurable employment up to the first day of their maternity leave."

Maternity benefit is based on relevant wages ("The Relevant Tax Year is the second last complete income tax year before the year in which your maternity leave starts")

http://http://www.citizensinformation.ie/en/social_welfare/social_welfare_payments/social_welfare_payments_to_families_and_children/maternity_benefit.html

It may be worth your while talking to someone in the Social Welfare office to determine what maternity benefit you'd be entitled to. This may help sway your decision one way or another.

On another note, though, a 3 hour commute (regardless of whether or not you are pregnant) is significant...would you want to continue that once the babe is born (think of childcare arrangements, time away from family, etc).

barbiegirl

Ayla the 3 hour commute is a huge issue and one i keep coming back to. The company are not obliged to hold my job when i would go on leave as i wouldn't be there a year so i'd probably be looking for work afterwards anyway.
This babs fingers crossed is due at the begining of feb so this years stamps would apply. I'm having lunch with a good friend who generally sets me in the right direction. To be honest the only attraction of the job is that it is a job.

Ayla

barbiegirl wrote: »

The company are not obliged to hold my job when i would go on leave as i wouldn't be there a year so i'd probably be looking for work afterwards anyway...To be honest the only attraction of the job is that it is a job.

http://www.irishstatutebook.ie/1994/en/act/pub/0034/sec0026.html#zza34y1994s26

"26.—(1) Subject to this Part, on the expiry of a period during which an employee was absent from work while on protective leave, the employee shall be entitled to return to work—

(a) with the employer with whom she was working immediately before the start of that period or, where during the employee's absence from work there was a change of ownership of the undertaking in which she was employed immediately before her absence, with the owner (in this Act referred to as “the successor”) of the undertaking at the expiry of the period of absence,

Looking through this Act, it doesn't appear as though there's a stipulation you have to be employed by the company for 12 months before they hold your job. Don't honestly know if that's a legal requirement or not.

As far as having a job just to have a job...it feels good to work, but that commute... surely you could find something (anything!) closer if all you want is the satisfaction of being employed :eek:

barbiegirl

I have to day that i do want a lot more from a job than it just being a job i was hoping for a call up for a better role in a better bigger company but so far notthing though they have said end of today.

I guess i'm worried about hubbies stress levels with me at home though currently paid to end of June.

I work in IT and thete's decent roles out there I think I'll take myself out of the running.

Hannibal Smith

If I was you I wouldn't act hastily. You're not going to be telling people until your 12 weeks presumably? And if you're only four weeks now, you can tell them at any stage within or after the 12 weeks that you just found out.

You're as entitled to work and to that job as anyone other applicant. If it's a good position and it'll help your career in the longterm and you can deal with the 3 hour commute I would take the job for now, if you're offered it.

You're going to be running into this problem with any other job application for the rest of the pregnancy. It's easier to conceal now, so if you can stick with a job up to 16 weeks before the maternity leave (to protect your maternity benefit) that's what I would do.

willow tree

first off big congrats, great news! :D:D the most important thing is that you have a healthy happy pregnancy for you and baby so what would make it so? 1) wait and see if you get offered job, you wont be saying anything to anyone until 12weeks probably anyway..
would the three hour commute stress v your husbands stress be outweighed? if you can afford it, couls u stay at home and try to support your hubby in other ways, having dinner ready, house clean etc? if you really cant afford it, then take this if you get and as you say you are a good worker, they will get someone once you've gone and as you say, its you who has to find something after anyway (its different for everyone, you dont know how you will feel but i was WRECKED when pregnant, my 2 hr commute became too much at the end i took 1month leave, v supportive boss).. hope it works out great for u;)

Cat Melodeon

I'd say that if it was a good job that will make a genuine contribution to your career, go for it. Don't tell them, you wouldn't be expected to have found out until you're further along and in any case, it would be discriminatory for them not to hire you on the basis of your pregnancy (although we all know 'other' reasons could be found to not select you).

On the other hand, if you're taking this job for the sake of a job, if it's not going to help your career prospects, if you're only taking it because of your husband's stress levels, if the long commute and the thought of telling them is going to add to your own stress levels, well, that's not a very nice place to be.

I was in a broadly similar situation when I got pregnant on my first. My contracts generally run Jan-Dec, I was 2 months along when interviewing and it was going to be nearly a 3hr round trip for not a lot of pay and not a lot of added value. In the end, I didn't take the job. I got some part-time work locally which ended before I was due. I got state maternity benefit on the basis of my previous full-time job and then was on dole for a year. I don't get anything now but I have picked up some valuable piece-work here and there, with a couple of regular bits to keep me going. I don't know whether to call myself freelance or unemployed or a part-time worker or a stay-at-home-parent, whatever I am, I'm happy enough. We really miss the extra income but when I look back on the time I've been able to spend with my boy (2 in Aug) I hope we'll be able to afford to stay going as we are when this next one comes along (Nov) as I'd hate for him/her to miss out on the same attention my son got. We've also saved on childcare & transport costs, and I've been able to keep up my skills & professional contacts through home study, volunteering with an industry organisation and attending the odd conference etc.

Follow your gut instinct on this, but don't be ruled by guilt over not working if that's all it's coming down to.

Hunter Mahan

I was just wondering if you are in the early stages of pregnancy, will it show up in any medical you may get for a new job?

@Hunter

@Hunter Mahan - It shouldn't. I did a medical for a new job at 14 weeks pregnant. The doctor asked if my periods were normal and I told her I was pregnant. She said she wouldn't put it in the report as she wouldn't have known otherwise.
Even if it does get noted in the medical you will usually be offered the job beforehand and they can't un-offer you the job because you're pregnant. It's protected under discrimination legislation in the 'family status' category.

LegacyUser

Congrats on your news after all you have been through. Some times these things happen when we least expect it and they happen for a reason.
I know being out of work is not easy.
In regards to the job which you may be offered could you get a bus or train to work or would you have to drive.
I would ring the department of social welfare and see what money you are entitled to at the moment and how much pay you would get for maternity pay.
I would look at all your expenses and see if you could manage on one wage.
If you take the job you will need to have plenty of rest, eat well and have a walk each day.
I would tell your new employer once you 12/14 weeks pregnant so they can get a replacement and that you will time to train them up.
I see that you work in IT could you get a contract which would allow you to work from home for some of the time?
Also I would ask people you know or look on the internet or buy and sell for baby products ie cot, mosses basket, changing table as you could save some money on these. I would buy a new car set and go to a shopping with some one who knows about these. Good luck with everything.