Weak Handshake

mosesgun

a soft or gentle handshake is one thing but the completely dead, cold wet fish of a handshake is where the problem is and this gives the gentle ones a bad name. Some say it's a lack of confidence but it's more than that. Anyone can pretend to be confident and give you a little squeeze, even if they're not totally comfortable with it. It's a social norm. It's the feckers who don't bother to put any effort in at all who shouldn't be trusted. I've interviewed a couple of people over the years with this non-handshake nonsense and did they get the job? did they bollox.

St.Spodo

I don't think you can read too much into someone's handshake simply because the other person may not see a firm handshake as a necessity. They might not be bothered about it.It doesn't reflect on their personality. Whenever I shake someone's hand and they shake it too hard, I do an exaggerated pelvic thrust and shout ''you good thing ya''.

Davekoolhill

The worst I think is the wet fish, it's the worst thing ever! Sometimes your get a floppy wet fish at mass.

joseph brand

You got the 'Wet Kipper'?

I hate those too, but then I have reason to. It's how I met my wife. True story.

Davekoolhill

joseph brand wrote: »

You got the 'Wet Kipper'?

I hate those too, but then I have reason to. It's how I met my wife. True story.

Ha did your wife have a wet kipper handshake???

shrubs

I was brought up with the view that a firm handshake is a sign of respect. The problem is that my work is quite physical and because of that i have a fairly strong grip and sometimes when i shake hands with someone i can see them wince. it is not my intention to crush bones but i know they're thinking "what a bollox, he meant to do that"

soyawhatsup

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iPGqfmLMWyo

Sunnyisland

When I shake hands I tend to put my foot in it.

SuperInfinity

A weak handshake means that they masturbate a lot.

Seriously, they did studies on this.

Sunnyisland

SuperInfinity wrote: »

A weak handshake means that they masturbate a lot.

Seriously, they did studies on this.

Pull the other one

Sonnenblumen

chickendinner wrote: »

What the hell is up them?

I meet a new acquaintance last week & offered a handshake, as is the norm in my line of work,only to be returned with a handshake weaker than a 20 day old piece of lettuce.

I took an instant dislike to the man. To be honset, I'd prefer a handcrusher.

I think they should teach people how to shake hands properly in school - it's a social faux pas not to know how to shake hands like a normal person.

Great people have a light touch.

LighterGuy

does it automatically mean something?

It all depends.
I could meet a guy tomorrow and shake his hand to recieve the weakest handshake ever. It could turn out said guy is soft and not a physical type of bloke. My assumptions from the handshake were correct,
Equally, I could meet a guy with the same soft handshake and he could be a mans man.

Its very similiar to a person who dosnt look you in the eye. Could be them being shy / lack of confidence. Could also be they are a snake of a person.

Cill Dara Abu

Well I play Gaelic Football and shake hands with my marker before the match starts and if I get a weak handshake I know this guy is not really up for it on the other hand if I get a good strong handshake I know my marker will be up my hole all game, it has always turned out that way, its always a good indicator of someones mood but I do'nt think you can judge someones over-all personality by a handshake.

Full.Duck

Oranage2

Full.Duck wrote: »

F*cking masons!:mad:

Needler

Mr. Denton wrote: »

I'd like to ban handshakes. For all you know you're shaking the hands of a person who 10 minutes prior was taking a piss and never bothered to washed after.

I know I'm right here because I shake peoples hands several times a day and I never washed.

Sure it will still be the cleanest thing you'll touch all day

Kojak

Weak handshakes annoy the píss out of me.

If you are not going to do it right, don't fúcking bother at all. You'd swear it would kill some people to put a bit of effort in.

Imagine you were going in for an interview for a job and you give a limp handshake - the interviewer will automatically think that this person is not up to much/doesn't really want to be here.

Kanoe

some burly woman almost cut off the circulation in my hand the other night, I wouldn't mind but we were in a pub and I fking hate that **** in a pub. why I'm supposed to shake someone's hand in such an informal setting is beyond me. Anyway, apparently I'm a weak handshaker. :rolleyes:

edit; also, my handshake strength is directly proportional to the amount of interest I may or may not have in an individual.

--LOS--

I'm a clammer, I can't help it, but I do make a point of giving a strong handshake.

we were taught how to give a handshake in school OP!

Oranage2

I also dont know what the big deal about hand shakes are - I rarely shake peoples hands and if i do have to its usually one of those things out of politness though not really a need for and i cant remember getting a bad hand shake.


Though saying that I recently met the CEO of the company i work for, i'm only there a month and i wanted to make a good impression so when we came to shaking hands, i was a tad overzealous, he looked me in the eye and he had a bemuzzed look in his eyes wondering why i was crushing his hand. It looks as though he'll remember me so a good memberble hand shake is important i guess!!

krudler

I dont get it, I never remember a handshake the second its over with, its a polite gesture, to judge someones entire personality on something so insignificant is retarded

jaykhunter

I used to limp handshake until I realised how badly it comes off; so I generally just give a firm handshake for a few seconds (for blokes), probably shorten that to a quick squeeze of a girl's hand.

Learnt alot about proper handshakes from the start of Predator.

eternal

chickendinner wrote: »

What the hell is up them?

I meet a new acquaintance last week & offered a handshake, as is the norm in my line of work,only to be returned with a handshake weaker than a 20 day old piece of lettuce.

I took an instant dislike to the man. To be honset, I'd prefer a handcrusher.

I think they should teach people how to shake hands properly in school - it's a social faux pas not to know how to shake hands like a normal person.

Truely laughed at this.The imagery .Seriously ,I love it .

enda1

For the people who don't remember ever getting a bad handshake, or those that don't see the big deal, YOU are the people we're talking about - you limp-handshaking divils!

messymess

The only thing worse than a limp handshake is a slimy weak handshake.

copeyhagen

messymess wrote: »

The only thing worse than a limp penis is a slimy weak handshake.

fixed that for you.

@OP
in this day and age for someone to be commenting on a handshake they received is pretty ghey

kfallon

Davekoolhill wrote: »

Ha did your wife have a wet kipper handshake???

No she just had a really wet 'kipper' when she saw him, as wet as an otter's pocket :pac:

The_Snapper

chickendinner wrote: »

I took an instant dislike to the man. To be honset, I'd prefer a handcrusher.

Weak handshake and or bitten nails lacks sincerity to me.....

xsiborg

xsiborg wrote: »

rather kinky female friend of mine was introducing me to her new girlfriend when her girlfriend put forward her hand to shake mine, i hesitated for a second, then pretended to not have noticed the gesture because i knew EXACTLY where her hand had been, and just the mental image, *shudders*, wasnt the first place you'd think of either, try round the back! :eek:

What the Whaaat?

HellFireClub

Biggins wrote: »

You mean your not in on the secret masonic handshake!
Opps... I've said too much already!

[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, Sans]You shall suffer under no less pain than having your tongue cut out from under your chin and to be buried within the flood mark where no man shall know.[/FONT]...

:D:D