The noisy kid next door.....

poconnor16

We've recently started renting a semi detatched house, happy with the rent, area etc.....really nice house. We soon realised though that the walls are paper thin (poor construction), we could sometimes hear our neightbours talking etc. To be fair, we are lucky as they are a mid aged couple with one kid, so usually not that much noise.

However, over the last month or so, the noise that their kid makes in driving us crazy. Now, I have nothing against them or their kid (he's actually adorable ) but its getting to the point where I have to try something.
It starts at 6.30am usually, he begins screaming, and I mean SCREAMING. Not too bad during the week as I have to get up anyway, but sunday morning lie ins are not happening due to this.
Then there is the night time. He is put to bed at about 10.30pm (He cant be more than 3??) and he screams for a good two hours. So I can't go to bed early and if I do I am woken.

Last night I actually began worrying that there was something seriously wrong, he was screaming so badly.

Should I ring my landlady? (She is also their landlady). I know you might advise approaching the neighbours but they have little English as I am not a parent, I am hesitant and feel sorry for them in a way. If I'm not sleeping, they certainly aren't.


uuuggghhh, I need nap under my desk. Shattered :rolleyes:

muboop1

Tbh, I'd guess the parents are doing everything they can!

Would ear plugs be an option?

Aprilmay

The child may suffer from night terrors and the parents are also up with the child. They may not realise your awake -ear plugs may be your only solutions as if it is night terrors they can last for months even years. He might be crying before bed as he doesn't want to go to bed. You could also mention it to the parents casually that you heard the child crying and say that you hope he was ok - so your not actually complaining as such but it would give the parents an opportunity to say if this is the case. Sorry I can't be of more help but it was the first thing that came to mind.

ShadowHearth

Maybe before going to landlord try to talk with them first?

As much as kids are adorable, such things can wreck your head and you will see then as anticrists.

Have a wee chat with a cup of tea. Try to explain your problem and maybe they will be more coutions.

poconnor16

Cheers all,

I really dont know the situation, so I thought it would be bad form to go running to my landlady. ONe thing I will say is that the kid could just be shattered. He is defo under 3 years and not getting enough sleep. But its not their fault - they only have one car, and I've often seen the father taking kid out at 10.30 at night to collect mum from what seems to be a nursing job. Then back up the next morning, probably to creche or something.

I dont think talking to them is an option. The really keep to themselves, tried chatting before and they just smiled, nodded and tried to get away. Could be a language barrier.

I think I could be looking into a years supply of ear plugs.

ShadowHearth

poconnor16 wrote: »

Cheers all,

I really dont know the situation, so I thought it would be bad form to go running to my landlady. ONe thing I will say is that the kid could just be shattered. He is defo under 3 years and not getting enough sleep. But its not their fault - they only have one car, and I've often seen the father taking kid out at 10.30 at night to collect mum from what seems to be a nursing job. Then back up the next morning, probably to creche or something.

I dont think talking to them is an option. The really keep to themselves, tried chatting before and they just smiled, nodded and tried to get away. Could be a language barrier.

I think I could be looking into a years supply of ear plugs.

not being smart, but you can do something or just bend over and take it in...

You need to talk to THEM first, before going to landlord, as talking to landlod first can make situation even worse. They will be quite offended with this and then your good relationship with them will be shaterred.


if you dont want to talk to them, then make them to talk to you?

have a lovely day off with partner, get some vine, lovely dinner, candles. Makes yourself a romantic night inside and then have a stormy "LOVE" night in the room that faces theyr bedrooms. dont hold it in, but let it all out, so they would hear everything.

when they will come over "complain" say this: "your kid screamed alot and we could not sleep, so we decided to try it out too! WE LOVED IT!". I bet your noise problem will be sorted.

poconnor16

ShadowHearth wrote: »

not being smart, but you can do something or just bend over and take it in...

You need to talk to THEM first, before going to landlord, as talking to landlod first can make situation even worse. They will be quite offended with this and then your good relationship with them will be shaterred.


if you dont want to talk to them, then make them to talk to you?

have a lovely day off with partner, get some vine, lovely dinner, candles. Makes yourself a romantic night inside and then have a stormy "LOVE" night in the room that faces theyr bedrooms. dont hold it in, but let it all out, so they would hear everything.

when they will come over "complain" say this: "your kid screamed alot and we could not sleep, so we decided to try it out too! WE LOVED IT!". I bet your noise problem will be sorted.

hahahaahaha.......that is truly one of the finest posts!!

but if they are so shy that they will barely look up at me on a normal day, I dont think they will call around to complain about our 'shenanigans'. I'm sure my other half would eb only happy to try this approach though!!

Tea drinker

....and potentially be scarred for life due to screaming child while having sex.

poconnor16

well lads, you've cheered me up in my tired state anyway! Am in fits of giggles here

Kintarō Hattori

OP, regardless of how quiet/shy this couple is you will have to force them to speak to you. A year of not having a good nights sleep will take a toll on you, your partner and your relationship.

You need to speak to them, if nothing happens there bring it to the landlady and if nothing happens there try for a case with the PRTB. You shouldn't be able to hear your neighbours talking in their house. Seeing as you can I would argue that it isn't fit to live in.

poconnor16

Kintarō Hattori wrote: »

OP, regardless of how quiet/shy this couple is you will have to force them to speak to you. A year of not having a good nights sleep will take a toll on you, your partner and your relationship.

You need to speak to them, if nothing happens there bring it to the landlady and if nothing happens there try for a case with the PRTB. You shouldn't be able to hear your neighbours talking in their house. Seeing as you can I would argue that it isn't fit to live in.

Well thats an interesting point....I know I am entitled to peace and quiet etc. I will try to avoid that avenue if at all possible. I'm going to give it this week, and if it is still continuous I might call around after work some evening. Try and have a chat. I just dont want to be seen as an inconsiderate person, I'm sure it is hard on them too.

ShadowHearth

poconnor16 wrote: »

hahahaahaha.......that is truly one of the finest posts!!

but if they are so shy that they will barely look up at me on a normal day, I dont think they will call around to complain about our 'shenanigans'. I'm sure my other half would eb only happy to try this approach though!!

allways happy to help

Thespoofer

OP, have you considered the child may be Autistic and cannot help it ? .........I love when people without kids try to comment on how others should manage theirs....

Dilynnio

Hey OP

Its a nightmare when you can not get proper rest.

You are paying rent for a HOME........so you are entitled to the quite and peaceful enjoyment of it.

What I advise you to do is to write a note to the couple next door
and leave your mobile number on it.

If you hear nothing back then contact your landlord.

Trust me when I say that your quality of life will become a disaster as a result of lack of sleep.

Write a note and be polite in it.

Good luck I feel your pain.

Jane Eyre

Thespoofer wrote: »

OP, have you considered the child may be Autistic and cannot help it ? .........I love when people without kids try to comment on how others should manage theirs....

I love it when people with children think that their rights are more important than anybody elses. I'm a parent, but I don't assume that anyone else should suffer because of it.
Even if the child does have autism, why should the OP have to suffer? Of course I'm sympathetic, but if I had a child that was so disturbed that he woke the neighbourhood every night, I think I'd try and rent a house with thicker walls. Or a detached house.

CluelessGirl

I have to agree with you here.

It is ridiculous where people who live in apartments with kids assume they can allow there kids to run riot.

I had numerous problems with kids running over my patio and bouncing balls of my outside walls that I got the community police involved. Kids screaming outside at 8 a.m. their parents throwing them outside to play for the day.

I would not tolerate a screaming kid. I work hard for my home and I want to enjoy it. I have the right to a sleep and a lie on whenever I want without being woken up. So do you OP.

It IS the parents fault for being inconsiderate to the other people that live around.

stargazer 68

Wouldnt be able to cope with that!

The guy next door to me plays guitar and sings - not very well IMO. But he clearly sings in a band or whatever as he seems to be 'practising'. His favourite one is 'your sex is on fire' - wish he was on fire sometimes!

House is up for sale at the moment so hopefully someone quieter moves in - if not I will be moving out!

ShadowHearth

Dovies wrote: »

Wouldnt be able to cope with that!

The guy next door to me plays guitar and sings - not very well IMO. But he clearly sings in a band or whatever as he seems to be 'practising'. His favourite one is 'your sex is on fire' - wish he was on fire sometimes!

House is up for sale at the moment so hopefully someone quieter moves in - if not I will be moving out!

He didn't burn alive ?! Lol

Tea drinker

Dovies wrote: »

The guy next door to me plays guitar and sings - not very well IMO. But he clearly sings in a band or whatever as he seems to be 'practising'. His favourite one is 'your sex is on fire' - wish he was on fire sometimes!

Just imagine him singing the same tune, badly , when he is 70 years of age, and his teeth falling out.

jackal

All the suggestions about talking to the parents, I just cannot see that going well. They are probably more tired than you.

What you would effectively be doing is trying to tell them how to treat their own child in their own home. Its not your fault or their fault the builders were allowed to throw up absolute crocks of s**t which have zero sound insulation.

If you are renting, just move. You are entitled to quiet enjoyment of your home, and that should be perfectly adequate to break the lease. Talk to the PTRB.

Thespoofer

Jane Eyer,

1) How have I suggested that people with children should have 'more important' rights than anybody else's ?

2) You've just found the cause of the problem in your statement, its not the child's fault, it the walls......

3) Why would you suggest ' people suffer ' because you're a parent ?



OP, What is your landlady going to do, demand your neighbours child doesn't cry ?

mathie

ShadowHearth wrote: »

Have a wee chat with a cup of tea.

Tea. It's not just for drinking.

jenizzle

Is there anything to be said for asking the landlord for some soundproofing in the house?

Dades

You say you're in a semi, usually semis have bedrooms on both the attached and detached sides. If there a chance that their kid could be moved to the other side of the house?

You'd have to ask them in a very understanding manner, though I'd imagine they hardly look at you at the moment because they know their child is a shouter.

poconnor16

Thespoofer wrote: »

Jane Eyer,

1) How have I suggested that people with children should have 'more important' rights than anybody else's ?

2) You've just found the cause of the problem in your statement, its not the child's fault, it the walls......

3) Why would you suggest ' people suffer ' because you're a parent ?



OP, What is your landlady going to do, demand your neighbours child doesn't cry ?

guys, please dont start an argument.....:)


Thespoofer - yes I have considered this actually - my godchild is autistic so I know well what that entails. This is the reason why I am hesitant to come knocking on their door. Living with autism is incredibly difficult.....and there are so many other possibilities - you just dont know.

I am in no way blaming anyone here, just looking for opinions. Whether child does have a disability or not - it is not their fault.

poconnor16

Interesting points regarding the contruction of the house - they were basically just thrown up. The landlord owns all the houses, its his plot of land. So he had them constructed for as cheap as possible. We only realised this when we first heard the noise....

Signed a one year lease, so cant just up and go. There was no screaming/crying last night but there was a mjor tantrum this morning at 6.30.

I dont want to approach the neighbours, I cant tell them how to 'parent' plus as previously mentioned I dont know what the circumstance is.
I think the landlord might be a better option....I just want to avoid the hassle and I dont want to mention 'my rights' etc, I'd like to keep the good relationship I have with my landlord too.

ROCK >> ME << HARD PLACE

f9710145

Sometimes kids go through a phase (especially at that age) where they scream about everything. My 3yo is doing it at the moment - if his brother looks sideways at him he'll shriek. He did it once cos someone closed the sitting room door. You'd swear is fingers were caught in it from the scream but he was half way up the stairs, it just annoyed him for some reason. Thankfully our houses are well built but I'm sure the neighbours still hear quite a bit. But they know we're doing everything we can about it - following all the suggested methods, etc. But at the end of the day if a child decides to throw a tantrum there is no way to keep them quiet, bar clamping a hand over their mouths for the 10 mins that they're screaming but I'm pretty sure this would just prompt a social services call. It's unfortunate that it's that early, but my kids are always up by 6.30 with us running after them trying to keep them quiet. Unless they're bound and gagged though there's no way of preempting a loud song or stamping game. You can stop it as soon as you can but that 10 seconds could be enough to wake the dead.
As mentioned, the problem here is with the house and the walls. Unless the parents are beating the child which is the cause of the screaming, it's highly likely that they are suffering far worse than you are. I know in our case if there was anything we could do to help the phase pass more quickly then we would do it. We're not listening to it for fun.
Have a quick chat with the parents and you should be able to gauge if they're as exhausted too or if they don't care. Trust me if they care they'll be mortified but there is probably very little that they haven't already tried. It'll pass eventually.

meoklmrk91

I feel your pain op, I lived in a converted stable apartment thingy, due to it being an old building it was listed and there could be very little modifications. I could hear my neighbor talking, word for word, sometimes about me, snoring, coughing, and throwing housepartys at five in the morning. I complained but the manager took a disliking to me because i chose to pay my rent directly to the landlord instead of him. And anytime I went to make a complaint he would either tell me that the music and shouting couldn't have been that loud because he didn't hear it or he would go and say it to her and then come back and basically abuse me because she had said I was up until four in the morning this night or that night, not true. This was the same woman who made a complaint the first night I moved in about banging cupboards. In fairness the walls were paper thin but instead of dealing with it in a proper manner she behaved in a small a petty manner. Needless to say I ended up moving out, but the whole thing had put a serious amount of stress on me and my health did suffer.

So I would definitely say that you should try and keep things as civil as possible, you seem to be very understanding and that is really good like you said it's not the kids fault it's the poorly constructed property. You could alter your own living situation, move your bedroom to the other side of the house if that is possible, annoying but anything for a quiet life. I know you feel uncomfortable about speaking to them so that could be an option. If you do decide to speak to them tread carefully, they don't sound like the type of people who would be looking for trouble so that's good, you could just say to them that you heard him crying last night is he not feeling well or something like that. Anyway op I hope you get this situation sorted as I know that it can be a hellish experience dealing with noisy neighbours, I would however suggest that you try as much as possible to make sure that the situation stays nice and calm as believe me nasty neighbours are in a whole league of their own. Best of luck.