How much should I be getting paid for childminding?

Zara23

Hi everyone, I have a few questions regarding my new job as a childminder. I put up and ad and got a response to meet a woman with 3 children who needed a childminder, part-time. They included a 6 month old baby, a 3 year old boy, and a 7 year old boy. I met with the mother who seemed a bit quiet and didn't ask me many questions. I had to fill the silences with answers of what I thought she should be asking (my age, experience etc). She introduced me to her children and they were also quiet which I put down to shyness. I assumed they would be more confident talking with me when they got used to me. When she told me I had the job, I asked her if there was anything she wanted me to do/not do, what they ate, what time they went to bed and would they be comfortable with me. She assured me they would be no problem.

I have been babysitting them now for a few weeks, and it is CLEAR that the 7 year old has Autism. I have 2 nephews with Aspergers Syndrome so I know the signs. I also noticed letters on their fridge which state that he does have the disorder. None of this was mentioned at the interview when I agreed to 7 euro an hour. This child is more difficult than the others combined and is very aggressive. He pushes, scratches and punches me and nothing can get him to stop. When I ignore it, he starts to punch the baby and I can't allow this. He is not my child so I do not feel comfortable putting my hands on him to put him in time out. I have to take the baby into a separate room and hold the door closed.
I have talked to the mother but she just says 'Oh yeah, he does that sometimes,' or 'He'll calm down after a while.'
I've tried everything. I've tried games, painting, and reading. Nothing helps. It seems like he doesn't even hear me.
So my question is, do you think it's wrong that she didn't inform me of this before offering the job? Do you think 7 euro an hour is fair for 3 children including an infant and a child with a special need? She seems to be paying me even less than we agreed. Last Saturday I worked 12 hours for 50 euro.
And most importantly, what can I do to help calm these tantrums and stop the violence?

Eoin

I think this might be a better forum for your thread.

Babyblessed

Dont know where the thread was before but not sure its a parenting issue as OP isnt a parent...

Anyway OP, I have kids and my youngest has a sensory disorder... not autism but he is a pain at times. I understand autism tho as both my neice and nephew have it.

Personally I think €7 per hour is cheap but then if I was paying it I wouldnt. (I couldnt afford €7ph) :rolleyes: If it were one child, I'd prob say its ok but 3 and one with autism...mmm seems a bit unfair.

I am amazed at the mum. If someone was coming to look after my child at home I would ensure they knew about his quirks and preferences. Awful as it is to actually say, this child is assaulting you and his mother should have warned you that this may occur before you decided on whether to take the job. I dont know your circumstances but could you just leave? Especially if she is under-paying you.

I feel for the little boy. He doesnt know whats going on and it can be so difficult to explain to autistic kids about changes in routine. In fact changes in routine can be more than enough to really upset them!

Is this mums 1st time away from the kids? Maybe find out what her routine was before she went to work of what the previous minder used to do. Sorry Im not much help but I dont envy your position and I do hope things get better for all involved!

Eoin

Babyblessed wrote: »

Dont know where the thread was before but not sure its a parenting issue as OP isnt a parent...

It was in "work problems". OP is not a parent, but parents that use this forum might be able to advise the OP - as you've just shown!

yolanda

My sister minds children and being currently pregnant I felt I had to reply. This was by no means fair of this woman to not tell you her 7 year old has special needs. I have dealt with these children from time to time and difficult is an understatement. Did she think you would not notice? Is he in main stream school? Definitely should have informed you and you have every right to leave the job.
Secondly €7 an hour? For minding 3 kids and one practically being a full time job? 12 hours for €50???? Is that even legal? This woman is clearly taking advantage.
With regards to stopping the violence I'm afraid I don't have enough experience to advise you with this but what I would say is that I wouldn't go to too much trouble resourcing how to help as if I were you I would be informing this woman I would be leaving for a better opportunity with better pay.

Justask

Sorry I know this is off topic but she let you mind her autistic son without telling you he has speciel needs??

IMO thats really irresponsible :eek:

7 euro an hour to mind 3 small kids is to little I think

digme

15 an hour

keysersoze0330

It's outrageous, you are being taken for a mug. Needs to be nipped in the bud before it gets out of hand.

Also €50 for 12 hours is €4.50, not even the poor €7 agreed.

January

Threads merged

Zara23

Sorry for the wrong thread location! I agree it is also unfair to the child as autistic children depend a lot on the security of routine.

I would leave but as sad as it sounds, I am living on next to nothing at the minute and I really need the money- It's a shame she's taking advantage of that.

I have years of experience with kids and the other 2 are absolute angels so I didn't know what I was getting into when I agreed. I cannot think of an inoffensive way to mention the autism to her even though I've told her of his abuse. Her husband works full time, she works part time, and I assume she must be getting a carer's allowance for him so money shouldn't be a problem. We initially agreed on half 5 to half 11 at 40 euro per night. Now she's started asking me to come over at half 3, doesn't come home until 1 and still pays me 40 euro.
I fully respect any parent with a special needs child but surely you must agree that wages should reflect the work put into a job. I have never been so exuasted or pushed to my limits more than with this little boy. All my childminding skills, disciplines and rules don't apply with him and I am at a loss what to do. Any parents of children with autism out there with any ways I can connect with him?

Babyblessed

Zara...... you need to tackle her on the pay and the issues regarding the little boy. Ask her how she manages his autistic traits?

Orion

It's unfair to both you and the child. If you are not trained to look after a child with autism then it is difficult to know what to do. I fully understand your financial concerns too but I'd actually be more concerned about the care required. If you don't feel you can mind an autistic child and a toddler then you probably shouldn't be. Taking the baby into another room and excluding the autistic child is putting him at risk. You need to speak to the mother about whether are not you are the right person for the job - for the children's sake someone with special needs training may be better.

whatdoicare

I don't know alot about costing childminding but as someone who worked closely with Autism I am astounded she just left you to it!
The only advice I can give from experience is that what normally entertains a child will not work- but music and lining up objects games will. Don't get up in his space but maybe give him a xylophone or drum to play with and give him a quick demo (don't worry if he doesn't seem to be paying attention- he is) then just leave him to it, maybe with a cd playing- let him pick it out. Try to give him a routine - takes a while to establish but have patience and kindness and it will work. Speak slowly and clearly and give him a chance to respond (including ticks he may have)give him space and understand- you were not properly introduced into his day(totally mums fault) and he will be acting up because of it. If you are patient, he will relax more in time.

sponge_bob

Orion wrote: »

It's unfair to both you and the child. If you are not trained to look after a child with autism then it is difficult to know what to do. I fully understand your financial concerns too but I'd actually be more concerned about the care required. If you don't feel you can mind an autistic child and a toddler then you probably shouldn't be. Taking the baby into another room and excluding the autistic child is putting him at risk. You need to speak to the mother about whether are not you are the right person for the job - for the children's sake someone with special needs training may be better.

i agree with this, but in all fairness the mother is just taking op for a ride and i doubt that she is going to pay for someone with special needs training, ffs she is not even paying the agreed amt of €7 perhr.

OP, i wouldn't even bother trying to hold on to this job there is so many things wrong with it and it you are only a few weeks into it.
firstly she didn't bother to make you aware that the child had autism, this has serious implications on you and on the child. 1: you are not properly trained to deal with a difficult child and 2: if something happens the child while in your care the finger of blame is pointed firmly in your direction and with no specific training you won't have a leg to stand on. secondly she is clearly abusing your soft nature so you could expect to be called over next week at 1 or 2 in the day while she skives off to leave you working for a miserable €50. thirdly she is not to be trusted and is very cunning, its not like she dosn't know what she is doing. you can be very sure she knows exactly what she is doing.

i wouldn't even try to negotiate with her, i would ring her in the morning and arrange to collect your wages and inform her that you will not be continuing to work for her. trust me this will not work out well for you in the long run. of course if she is family then this changes things slightly but i would still be looking to quit the job. hope things work out allright

Moonbeam

Do you mind the kids in her house?
If so legally minimum wage would apply and she should be paying your prsi.
Unless it is casual babysitting.
The main reason that this would concern me is for insurance reasons pertaining to the autistic child.

implausible

What an utterly irresponsible parent! She has no regard for the position she has put you in and the appearance of no concern for her child. Any parent I know who has a special needs child thinks long and hard about leaving their child with anyone, let alone someone who doesn't know about their child's condition and doesn't have experience dealing with it.

If he is 7, is she not availing of the July provision?

Didisaythat

I find your reluctance to address the issues interesting. You say you have a lot of experience but is it professional? Parents with children with disabilities don't become experts and many are out of their depth. What is intimidating about her if she is quite in addressing pay and conditions? If you need the job and she clearly needs you, can you arrange a review meeting where you have you concerns and questions prepared. I suggest you start off with 3 positives and then lead in to concerns and question. A time sheet where you both sign it with the "agreed" hourly rate and total number of hours on it, dated and filed. I suggest you bothdevelop and agree a job description. Can you contact the Autism Assoc for guidance? did she ask you for references? What about garda clearence? Being an employee holds as much personal responsibility as does her responsibility as an employer. There is guidance about rates of pay for eveery industry including child care. So arm yourself with all you need to know and bring ot to the review meeting.

beagle001

That is below the min wage unless it's a cash in hand job which I suspect and you are claiming the dole as well.

Jess18

Regardless of whether the child had autism or not, €7 an hour for 3 children is pretty ridiculous. I do occasional childminding at the weekends for a 13 month old baby and get €6 an hour. I suggested €5 an hour to the parents, but they felt I was undercutting myself and said they would pay €6 an hour. I think for children, if the child didn't have autism I would say at least €10 an hour. I definitely think you should discuss the child who has autism, with the mother. She obviously doesn't understand how hard it is on both you and her son. If you are happy and willing to, I think she should pay for you to get some training or do some course for children with autism/special needs. This set up isn't fair for you, the child with autism, or the other siblings!! Best of luck

shannie

8 euro an hour

mikemac

If it was one child and cash in hand I might say ok but that's ridiculous money for minding three children

Collect your wages and put your ad back up.
People always need childminders and you'll get a better job

shannie

8 euro an hour for one child ... and if theres more than one child then 5 euro an hour.. per child

e.g : 3 children = 5x3= 15euro an hour
1 child = 8euro an hour

therefore if you babysit for 3 hours with 3 kids yours getting 45euro
and 1 child 24euro.

it makes sense right?

You should definitely be getting more than €7 an hour for three children, let alone when one requires special attention.

qwertytlk

I cannot advis you on the sitation with the autistic child as i have no experience. However i feel you are being seriously taken advantage of. 7euro per hour is pittance for the job your doing-minding an infant, a child with special needs and another child. Imo you should be getting at least 10 per hour, if not more! And then for her to underpay you, and ask you to work longer hours for the same money!its a disgrace! If you do noy tackle this, immeadlatly, it will likely just get worse. I know its awkward, but sit her down and tell her that she is getting a bargain having you mind her kids for that wage so she needs to make sure she gives you the correct money for the hours you have worked. And this is optional, but you could tell her you would like a wage increase because at the time of agreeing your hourly rate you did not know you would be looking aftre a child with special needs. She really should have told you. It shows a huge lack of respect for you and her children. Did she think you wouldnt notice? Imo, each time you work for her i would take note of the hours you work and have you wages worked out when she gets back. So if she rips you off again, you can say to her 'sorry i worked 10 hours, that should be 70, not 50' and if she has a problwm with that or makes an excuse then i would tell her that you will not be working there anymore if she is not going to pay you. I know you need the job, but do you need it so much you are willing to let your employer steal from you? Because this is actually what she is doing. Best of luck and please stand up for yourself or this woman will keep taking you for granted and it will just get worse.