episiotmies/tearing

billlumbergh

I'm absolutely terrified of tearing and episiotomies! when i spoke with my consultant a few weeks ago he told me that people with a hight BMI (like myself) are more likely to need an assisted delivery i.e Forceps! i in no way want a forceps delivery. i really don't want to have an episiotomy as they say that the tearing can be worse if one is performed. i feel sick thinking about it, help me! what can i do. Can i refuse a forceps?? episiotomy??

Casey_81

Thats one of my fears too... Was chatting to a friend about it and she recommends epi-no epi-no

And Perineal Massage

Not sure if either works.. but if you are really terrified it might be worth a shot?

Cottontail

I was afraid of an episiotomy too, but then I ended up having to have one, and a ventouse delivery. It was fine. I couldn't even remember afterwards whether I'd had to have one or not, my husband had to remind me :eek:

emmeim

Cottontail wrote: »

I was afraid of an episiotomy too, but then I ended up having to have one, and a ventouse delivery. It was fine. I couldn't even remember afterwards whether I'd had to have one or not, my husband had to remind me :eek:

same here, ventouse and epi and I was grand.

no point worrying yourself over these things now as you never know how labour is going to go. If you're being told your baby is in danger and needs to get out asap you won't care what they do to you to get them out safely

billlumbergh

emmeim wrote: »

same here, ventouse and epi and I was grand.

no point worrying yourself over these things now as you never know how labour is going to go. If you're being told your baby is in danger and needs to get out asap you won't care what they do to you to get them out safely

I know you're right, its just that the statistics for episiotomies are worryingly high, i wonder if its ALWAYS neccesary? i dunno. i'm feeling ill thinking about it.

Cottontail

You can't spend your pregnancy thinking like that though or you will have yourself driven mad by the end. You could very well have a normal delivery, with no interventions and a happy healthy baby at the end.

Hannibal Smith

I'm the same OP...my first was a section, so I've no idea how tough it's going to be pushing this one out, I'm so afraid of tears and cuts and all sorts...when I heard I had a low lying placenta I was a little relieved ...but I guess I'll keep thinking positive, I'm gonna push this baby out all by myself and whatever happens happens...I've confidence in the delivery team that they'll do whatever they have to get baby out safely *prays*

How Strange

The perineal massage is recommended to stretch the area to minimise tearing. It's an uncomfortable thing to do in late stages of pregnancy but you get used to it, it's only for the last few weeks and if it works then it's worth it.

I don't know if you can refuse to have an episiotomy unless absolutely medically necessary. It was one of my greatest fears too hence why I did the perineal massage and thankfully the coombe don't do them unless absolutely necessary. Their thinking is that a natural tear heals better than a cut.

PrincessPixie

I had both happen, 1st baby had an episiotomy, 2nd came to fast and tore. The episiotomy scare healed very nicely you'd hardly notice the tear didn't it's all lumpy and bumpy, it's easier to stitch a controlled cut rather that a jagged tear

Everyone has a fear of that area being sliced open and if you've never had a baby before it's hard to imagine what happens, but it really is all in the moment and you forget about everything that happened with time.

Bear in mind what ever route you go with a vaginal delivery your bits will never be the same again at any level

crazy cat lady

Having performed episiotomies, I was quite worried about having one too! But with a baby in distress and needing immediae delivery, you really won't care what they do to you!

At least with an episiotomy you are given a local anaesthetic which I believe helps for a few hours after the birth.

It's not pleasant, but, they could've cut my leg off with a spoon so long as my baby was born healthy.

Try to put your fears to the back of your mind for now, you'll be fine

Cat Melodeon

billlumbergh wrote: »

I'm absolutely terrified of tearing and episiotomies! when i spoke with my consultant a few weeks ago he told me that people with a hight BMI (like myself) are more likely to need an assisted delivery i.e Forceps! i in no way want a forceps delivery. i really don't want to have an episiotomy as they say that the tearing can be worse if one is performed. i feel sick thinking about it, help me! what can i do. Can i refuse a forceps?? episiotomy??

I have quite a high BMI but had no problems pushing my boy out on my own. I don't know how far gone you are Billumbergh, but if there is any time left at all, do kegel exercises three times daily and try and get on to a pregnancy yoga class if you can at all. There are even youtube classes you can follow for free - focus on the exercises that strengthen and tone the pelvic floor. It doesn't matter how overweight you are, THESE EXERCISES HELP! Not only with your ability to push effectively in labour, but also in your recovery afterwards. Walking and swimming and other gentle exercise to improve general fitness have been shown to improve outcomes for women in labour too, and it's never too late to start. The high BMI thing is less about weight and more about fitness levels - the fitter you get the better your stamina levels and the stronger your muscles.

You should also speak to the midwives about different labouring positions that can help get a baby out better (like hands and knees). Most of these require not getting an epidural, though, so maybe prepare for that too?

SanFran07

billlumbergh wrote: »

I know you're right, its just that the statistics for episiotomies are worryingly high, i wonder if its ALWAYS neccesary? i dunno. i'm feeling ill thinking about it.

No - it's not always necessary as you'll see from the differences in episiotomy rates from Wexford (8%) and H.Street 43%. Are women's 'bits' so different in H.Street that nearly half of first time Mums need to have a surgical cut to the perineum?

As Cat has said being as healthy as possible before birth is important (even more so for after baby arrives IMO). Epidurals come with higher rates of assisted deliveries so maybe consider preparing for your baby's birth without an an epi.

If you do have an epi I'd suggest writing down some birth preferences that include 'labouring down' for at least an hour after you're fully dilated if you and baby are well. That way your baby descends without a huge amount of effort (and all that purple faced pushing) which generally leads to more damage to the perineum and it's not good for baby. If you don't have an assisted delivery include in your birth preferences that you prefer not to have an episiotomy (and ask your partner to remind the MW at that time) Perineal massage is a good idea and will get you used to the stretching sensation. That sensation is a feedback system telling to to stop any pushing if you can to let your baby emerge more slowly. Labouring in warm water also reduces perineal injury and is fantastic for Mums with a high BMI to stay comfortably mobile in labour as you feel almost weightless. If your hospital doesn't have a labour pool consider getting one to use at home.

Of course nobody can predict what will happen on the day but thinking out some strategies ahead of time will help you feel more in control and less anxious about whats ahead.

Kimmers12345

Hi...I had a 3rd degree tear on my first little/big one!!! To b honest I didn't even know it had happened and I was to busy staring at our new bundle....I'm pregnant again now and due in November and Im going to try the pernial massage this time...:) pls try not to worry as ul only cause urself stress....they deliver babies all the time and like someone else said if d baby is in distress u won't care what they have to do at the time to get them out

Gilda Fortune

I was terrified of episiotimies as well. and i ended up having one. and i had a natural birth no pain relief. i can honestly say I didnt notice any extra pain. i was just focused on my baby. they numb you before the sow the area and i didnt feel this at all either. so please try not to worry.