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Adverse Reaction to chatting someone up/asking someone out

245

Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 296 ✭✭looky loo


    Well tbh that's what I love about the old "cock in the pintglass routine" I invented. Sometimes it works and you get the girl (or girls) other times you can use it as a defensive tactic and use your own pint glass which actually makes you look a little unstable.

    You sound unstable....no offense...lol


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,234 ✭✭✭amacca


    Well tbh that's what I love about the old "cock in the pintglass routine" I invented.

    you cant really take credit for that

    since the dawn of time man has been sticking his cock into things...including pint glasses whenever they first appeared

    you may have developed and perfected it perhaps as a means of both attracting and repulsing women depending on the situation...but invented, I doubt it.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 34,788 ✭✭✭✭krudler


    looky loo wrote: »
    The age of chivalry is dead........

    and women killed it- Dave Chapelle


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,589 ✭✭✭Hail 2 Da Chimp


    looky loo wrote: »
    Ok lets look at this from the other side....A girl comes over to a guy she fancies and tries to engage him in conversation, but he's not interested....how would you guys reply???????

    I'd ride her, I just wouldn't call her again...


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 296 ✭✭looky loo


    py2006 wrote: »
    Well I doubt he would say "F off", it has happened to be once or twice where a girl would strike up a conversation that I didn't fancy! But I just spoke to her as normal! She may have gotten from my body language that I was interested!

    You'd make a great politician....still havent answered my question...!!!..:)


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    gugleguy wrote: »
    y not try a non Irish Lady?

    Racism.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,133 ✭✭✭FloatingVoter


    looky loo wrote: »
    Ok lets look at this from the other side....A girl comes over to a guy she fancies and tries to engage him in conversation, but he's not interested....how would you guys reply???????

    Let her down gently, possibly inventing a wife, implying that in another world...who knows ?
    Everybody gets to walk away with dignity.

    edit: I'm 36 in Dublin, the wife trick won't work if in a small town / or very young.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,844 ✭✭✭py2006


    looky loo wrote: »
    You'd make a great politician....still havent answered my question...!!!..:)

    I thought I did! :confused::(


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 20,919 ✭✭✭✭Gummy Panda


    looky loo wrote: »
    Ok lets look at this from the other side....A girl comes over to a guy she fancies and tries to engage him in conversation, but he's not interested....how would you guys reply???????

    Chat back and be friendly if she wants more and I'm not interested just say I'm seeing someone else


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,194 ✭✭✭saa


    Haha I don't know what all this answer my question lark is about but its quite funny

    answer my question
    I said ANSWER MY QUESTION

    I just wouldn't :L


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,207 ✭✭✭jaffacakesyum


    Women need to learn that a guy saying hello doesn't mean that person wants to jump into bed with them. Too often you're trying to be polite and the woman (and more often her friends) think you're chatting them up.

    And why do you think this happens? Because when a woman does have a nice conversation with a lad who approaches her, and then subsequently tells them that no, she doesn't want to ride him, she gets a load of abuse.

    It has happened to me an insane amount of times and I've seen it a lot in Irish clubs and pubs.

    That said, I'm (usually :p ) always polite and friendly to guys that approach me but if they assume just because I'm having conversation with them, that I want their cock, they're sadly disappointed.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 296 ✭✭looky loo


    saa wrote: »
    Haha I don't know what all this answer my question lark is about but its quite funny

    answer my question
    I said ANSWER MY QUESTION

    I just wouldn't :L

    lols...I know...but I'd like to know how men would tackle this one......and it appears that they have to invent wives or phantom girlfriends to do it...


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,133 ✭✭✭FloatingVoter


    looky loo wrote: »
    lols...I know...but I'd like to know how men would tackle this one......and it appears that they have to invent wives or phantom girlfriends to do it...

    ...so the idea of a woman saying "I'm in a relationahip at the moment" when she isn't is beyond belief ? I've been at the receiving end and whether true or not it doesn't hurt (much).


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,844 ✭✭✭py2006


    looky loo wrote: »
    lols...I know...but I'd like to know how men would tackle this one......and it appears that they have to invent wives or phantom girlfriends to do it...

    But surely that is better than being rude or insulting? :confused:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,762 ✭✭✭✭stupidusername


    how does a girl go about chatting up a guy?


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 526 ✭✭✭7Sins


    looky loo wrote: »
    lols...I know...but I'd like to know how men would tackle this one......and it appears that they have to invent wives or phantom girlfriends to do it...

    I don't think there's a need to do anything :confused: If she wanted to chat I'd chat to her but it wouldn't go anywhere as it takes two to tango but if she blurted out something silly like she liked me and wanted to go out it'd be the "I think you're great but I only like you as a friend" lark


    Honestly, I can't wait until I get to say that to someone....any day now :(


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 20,919 ✭✭✭✭Gummy Panda


    how does a girl go about chatting up a guy?

    Lob it into me there, boss


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,234 ✭✭✭amacca


    looky loo wrote: »
    lols...I know...but I'd like to know how men would tackle this one......and it appears that they have to invent wives or phantom girlfriends to do it...

    thats stage two...stage one was talking but engineering the situation so you are talking to someone else etc (subtly...not storming ay)aw

    stage three is....sorry but I'm just not interested type of thing....this has only had to be resorted to once in my experience.

    you have to admit its better than

    no....and then turn your back

    or you must be joking etc and other extreme reactions just from the initial hello.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,571 ✭✭✭7sr2z3fely84g5


    Fck off and ride some foreigners will ye,had enough of this irish men and women are so and so...


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,024 ✭✭✭previous user


    GerM wrote: »
    Mate is chatting up girl in busy bar.

    Other mate standing idle attempts to strike up conversation with her mate who is also only out with one other friend.

    Mate: "So what do you do?"
    Girl: "No" *turns around on chair and faces other way with back to him*

    thats bad form.
    I would have said, well fuk you then you stuck up C*nt!


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,297 ✭✭✭Jaxxy


    Lob it into me there, boss

    This works. 100% success rate.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,762 ✭✭✭✭stupidusername


    Lob it into me there, boss

    and what if you want more than it 'lobbed' into ya?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,133 ✭✭✭FloatingVoter


    amacca wrote: »
    thats stage two...stage one was talking but engineering the situation so you are talking to someone else etc (subtly...not storming ay)aw

    stage three is....sorry but I'm just not interested type of thing....this has only had to be resorted to once in my experience.

    you have to admit its better than

    no....and then turn your back

    or you must be joking etc and other extreme reactions just from the initial hello.

    Agreed - by the time I'm inventing wives / girlfriends (and it only happened to me once due my not being George Clooney) - I'm at damage control. Downright rudeness is not a solution. A white lie can save the world.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,376 ✭✭✭Anyone


    Lob it into me there, boss

    Yeah that would work on me, she'd get the good lovin' too.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 296 ✭✭looky loo


    py2006 wrote: »
    But surely that is better than being rude or insulting? :confused:

    True....but would love to know a way of doing this without having to lie.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 296 ✭✭looky loo


    Anyone wrote: »
    Yeah that would work on me, she'd get the good lovin' too.

    This wouldnt work on me....you'd get a slap...!..


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,297 ✭✭✭Jaxxy


    thats bad form.
    I would have said, well fuk you then you stuck up C*nt!

    I'm not so sure that that's bad form tbh. If a randomer approached me in a bar and opened with "So, what do you do?" before a simple "Hi, how are ya?" I probably wouldn't be all that interested in talking to him either. Saying that I wouldn't be rude about it but I'd automatically assume (wrongly or otherwise) that this bloke was a bit of a boring snob.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,757 ✭✭✭MyPeopleDrankTheSoup


    what... do women approach guys often? i've never been approached in my life, gotta work for my punani


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,207 ✭✭✭jaffacakesyum


    JaxxYChicK wrote: »
    I'm not so sure that that's bad form tbh. If a randomer approached me in a bar and opened with "So, what do you do?" before a simple "Hi, how are ya?" I probably wouldn't be all that interested in talking to him either. Saying that I wouldn't be rude about it but I'd automatically assume (wrongly or otherwise) that this bloke was a bit of a boring snob.

    +1

    I don't think it's a very acceptable start to a conversation with a stranger. I would feel much more comfortable talking to a guy who came over and said "Hi, how are ya doing? Having a good night? [if in pub/club/at an event]" etc. and go from there, instead of being approached by a stranger and interrogated as to what it is I do for a living. None of your business is what I'm doing!! :p

    Nah, I wouldn't be rude and I'd answer the guy, but some men just have zero social skills and I don't find talking to guys like that particularly enjoyable.


  • Moderators, Category Moderators, Music Moderators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 22,360 CMod ✭✭✭✭Dravokivich


    and what if you want more than it 'lobbed' into ya?

    Jaysus, why don't ya just make up a list of demands.

    :P


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,376 ✭✭✭Anyone


    looky loo wrote: »
    This wouldnt work on me....you'd get a slap...!..


    Is getting slapped an adverse reaction? Guess it depends where :p


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,844 ✭✭✭py2006


    what... do women approach guys often? i've never been approached in my life, gotta work for my punani

    Not to us ugly fellas! :( Unless I had a bulging.....wallet!! :P


    (kidding)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,024 ✭✭✭previous user


    JaxxYChicK wrote: »
    I'm not so sure that that's bad form tbh. If a randomer approached me in a bar and opened with "So, what do you do?" before a simple "Hi, how are ya?" I probably wouldn't be all that interested in talking to him either. Saying that I wouldn't be rude about it but I'd automatically assume (wrongly or otherwise) that this bloke was a bit of a boring snob.
    +1

    I don't think it's a very acceptable start to a conversation with a stranger. I would feel much more comfortable talking to a guy who came over and said "Hi, how are ya doing? Having a good night? [if in pub/club/at an event]" etc. and go from there, instead of being approached by a stranger and interrogated as to what it is I do for a living. None of your business is what I'm doing!! :p

    Nah, I wouldn't be rude and I'd answer the guy, but some men just have zero social skills and I don't find talking to guys like that particularly enjoyable.

    Fair enough, that question can be a bit forward, but just saying i'm not interested instead of NO!! and blanking the guy thats just childish behaviour.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 845 ✭✭✭yupyup7up


    Dan133269 wrote: »
    Hello all,

    I thought this might be an interesting idea for a thread. Some girls, or possible fellas (although I'd say they're in the minority) react strangely to basic human nature.

    I once tried to get off with a girl in a late bar in Limerick, was getting on great with her, dancing, I threw the head on her and she pulled away. Fair enough I thought, shot down but sure it happens. Then she starts desperately pushing her way through the crowded pub as quick as she could glancing back at me frantically with terror etched all over her face, as if I had tried to rape her.

    Friend of mine in a pub in Galway approached 2 girls sitting on stools near the bar, said hello how's it going to 1 of them. Instantly, the other girl leapt off her seat and whacked my friend as hard as she could in the jaw. I thought it was the funniest story I ever heard.

    So, good people of After Hours, entertain us with your jocular anecdotes of unrequited love and/or lust!

    what late bar in Limerick OP? I may be able to source the problem :D


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,207 ✭✭✭jaffacakesyum


    Fair enough, that question can be a bit forward, but just saying i'm not interested instead of NO!! and blanking the guy thats just childish behaviour.

    But saying "i'm not interested" is still rude and is assuming the guy is trying to get in your pants.

    I don't know how I'd get out of a conversation with a guy who came up and asked "what do you do" without coming across rude...so I'd probably have to answer the guy and then make my excuses to leave later.

    It's a shame really. I am a very friendly girl and I generally talk to most people but I hate the idea that some men have, that they're entitled to a conversation when the girl doesn't have any interest in talking to him (same goes for genders reversed).

    How do you say "I'm sorry, I don't really want to talk to you" without coming across weird or rude :p


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 845 ✭✭✭yupyup7up


    what... do women approach guys often? i've never been approached in my life, gotta work for my punani

    If you wanna get approached, then head to the states! every time yanks come to limerick myself or the lads get chatted up. only happens with cougars and young wans in limerick. although the yanks are wrecked


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,571 ✭✭✭7sr2z3fely84g5


    Did you see eastenders last night.

    No.

    Ok see ya...


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,024 ✭✭✭previous user


    But saying "i'm not interested" is still rude and is assuming the guy is trying to get in your pants.

    I don't know how I'd get out of a conversation with a guy who came up and asked "what do you do" without coming across rude...so I'd probably have to answer the guy and then make my excuses to leave later.

    It's a shame really. I am a very friendly girl and I generally talk to most people but I hate the idea that some men have, that they're entitled to a conversation when the girl doesn't have any interest in talking to him (same goes for genders reversed).

    How do you say "I'm sorry, I don't really want to talk to you" without coming across weird or rude :p
    eh, just say I'm not interested , it's a hell of alot better than outright blanking them.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 296 ✭✭looky loo


    I would just say listen I'm sure you're a lovely guy but I'm not interested, I have no doubt that you will find somebody who is, have a great nite..:)


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,844 ✭✭✭py2006


    Apparently Liverpool and Newcastle girls are great! If they like they will approach YOU! They aren't as stuck up as SOME of our Irish girls!!

    American women are great at this too! No attitude problems! Was in a bar with a mate of mine in NY and we got chatting to the waitress who was serving us. She wrote down her name and number and met up with us for drinks afterwards!! Just friendly stuff! Quite refreshing!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,571 ✭✭✭7sr2z3fely84g5


    looky loo wrote: »
    I would just say listen I'm sure you're a lovely guy but I'm not interested, I have no doubt that you will find somebody who is, have a great nite..:)

    Good day to you madam *tips hat..


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,229 ✭✭✭Dan133269


    yupyup7up wrote: »
    what late bar in Limerick OP? I may be able to source the problem :D

    Nancy Blake's. Student night.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,844 ✭✭✭py2006


    Good day to you madam *tips hat..

    Yea but what if he is literally just making conversation because his mate is chatting away to yours and the two of you are just sitting/standing there staring at nothing!

    The whole assuming your being jumped on is a bit tiresome!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,571 ✭✭✭7sr2z3fely84g5


    py2006 wrote: »
    Yea but what if he is literally just making conversation because his mate is chatting away to yours and the two of you are just sitting/standing there staring at nothing!

    The whole assuming your being jumped on is a bit tiresome!

    Well,if you look at numberous posts from female perspective,you read many accounts of men groping and saying offensive things,i have witnessed it from times,im facially challenged myself,but honestly,i couldn't give a fck what the person thinks,sometimes its a lucky escape from the high and mighty.

    Oh and karma catches up with some of these people,an moment of weakness not finding their goodlooking prince or princess and they fall for a person they least expect and have kids with them.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 296 ✭✭looky loo


    py2006 wrote: »
    Yea but what if he is literally just making conversation because his mate is chatting away to yours and the two of you are just sitting/standing there staring at nothing!

    The whole assuming your being jumped on is a bit tiresome!

    I dont assume I'm being jumped on, I assume this person has taken a fancy to me and whats to chat me up, but then I do come from a different age and my opinions might be out dated given what i've read on this thread. I am polite without leading someone on. I think there is a happy medium in all this.

    If my friend was being chatted up and I was left talking to his friend, I would be polite maybe talk about the weather and stuff.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 852 ✭✭✭CrackisWhack


    Dan133269 wrote: »
    Hello all,

    I thought this might be an interesting idea for a thread. Some girls, or possible fellas (although I'd say they're in the minority) react strangely to basic human nature.

    I once tried to get off with a girl in a late bar in Limerick, was getting on great with her, dancing, I threw the head on her and she pulled away. Fair enough I thought, shot down but sure it happens. Then she starts desperately pushing her way through the crowded pub as quick as she could glancing back at me frantically with terror etched all over her face, as if I had tried to rape her.

    Friend of mine in a pub in Galway approached 2 girls sitting on stools near the bar, said hello how's it going to 1 of them. Instantly, the other girl leapt off her seat and whacked my friend as hard as she could in the jaw. I thought it was the funniest story I ever heard.

    So, good people of After Hours, entertain us with your jocular anecdotes of unrequited love and/or lust!


    She wanted you to chase her:rolleyes:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,757 ✭✭✭MyPeopleDrankTheSoup


    the best letdown if a girl isn't interested is 'i've got a boyfriend' even if it's a lie. it's grand, no-ones pissed off


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,144 ✭✭✭Scanlas The 2nd


    "Hey I remember you from playschool...you stole my crayons"


    "Sally sells sea shells by the sea shore"

    Two fun openers above. Why do people continually open with boring crap like "what do you do?"


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    looky loo wrote: »
    maybe talk about the weather and stuff.

    High pressure in the south region causing temperatures to rise ;)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,844 ✭✭✭py2006


    Well,if you look at numberous posts from female perspective,you read many accounts of men groping and saying offensive things,i have witnessed it from times,im facially challenged myself,but honestly,i couldn't give a fck what the person thinks,sometimes its a lucky escape from the high and mighty.

    Yea, I have seen that myself! But not all men are drunk, scumbags!!


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