Am I ready? pls advise x

girlygirl1989

Hay everyone,

I recently had a missed miscarriage at 11 weeks which me and the hubby were devastated about We are emotionally healing though. The thing is we want another baby I dont know if it was the miscarriage or the fact that everyone around me is pregnant that is making the feelings so strong!!

He is the exact same even wants one more then myself!, Thing is I am in my early 20's and currently looking for a job and he has a job, I was wondering is there a right time to have a baby? I know once I procure a job we will be financially stable enough to bring a baby into the world.

Should I wait till I am working?, just the loss of my baby has left me longing for one. Any advice would be appreciated thanks! xx

mw9121970

I am sorry for the loss of your baby. A lot of people say there is never the right time to have a baby. I would say that you are both in the right place - you would both love a baby. Job or no job I think you would make fantastic parents. What does your doctor say? Whatever you both decide I wish you the best of luck in the future.

okiss

Sorry for the loss of your baby. You are in your early 20's so you have plenty of time to try for a baby. I would get a job, have holidays, get a house and have a life before having a baby.
I have seen both side of having babies in your 20's and older.
I know someone who had a baby in her early 20's and her boyfriend did not want to know. She has never had a good job or money for holidays or the chance to enjoy life before she had a family.
Another friend of mine got a good qualification, good job, traveled and met a nice man who she married in her early 30's. They were trying for a baby for a few years but she had a baby recently. She told me it was a big life change but they wanted it and were ready for it.
I would put off having a baby for a few years so you can enjoy your life before this happens. You will be in a better position in a few years time and you won't resent the change in your life when you do start a family.

crazy cat lady

I'm very sorry to hear about your miscarriage. Unfortunately it happens so often to so many women. It really is a very cruel thing to have to go through.

There really never is a right time to have a baby. But it seems to me that the loss of your first baby has probably confirmed for you that you are both ready to become parents.

A baby doesn't have to be the big expense that some people allow it to be. We are currently surviving on one income, and I only work part time. My husband is a full time student, and our little girl was due around his end of first year exams. Not ideal! I can honestly say that we have never been happier and, although it would be lovely to have the money that we used to have, I wouldn't change anything! Our daughter brings so much happiness that money could never buy!

Friends and family are very generous and you will recieve a lot in hand me downs whether you want them or not in my experience! My daughter doesn't care what she's dresed in, so long as she is clean and respectable! I know this will change in a few years but until then...

We have been on many trips away with out daughter, both in and out of Ireland. We recently went to Portugal for 2 weeks. I don't believe that having a child should stop you from doing the things you want to do or seeing places you want to see. If anything, it should enrich the experience! Yes it takes a little more planning to travel with a small person, but its very doable!

Anyway, thats my input on the matter. At the end of the day only you and your partner can decide what is right for you and make your decision. One thing I can promise is that the longing fo a child after a miscarriage doesn't go until you have your baby in your arms.

Good luck in whatever you decide

girlygirl1989

Thanks for all your kind replies I appreciate it,

I think I will wait a month or two get myself physically and mentally ready, start taking vitamins and folic acid and try and secure a job

thanks everyone xx

mw9121970

girlygirl1989 wrote: »

Thanks for all your kind replies I appreciate it,

I think I will wait a month or two get myself physically and mentally ready, start taking vitamins and folic acid and try and secure a job

thanks everyone xx

Best wishes and the very best of luck to you both.