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Cost of a CM for a once off 24hr job

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  • 11-08-2011 2:45pm
    #1
    wolfpawnat
    Registered Users Posts: 6,124 ✭✭✭


    I am going to a wedding in September, and though my son is the page boy he is not attending the dinner or the hotel afterwards, so we are hiring a person to mind him from 3-4pm on the Saturday until about the same time on the Sunday. Excluding meals (as we are giving her money to go out for her dinner) and with a fridge and freezer full of food so she will want for nothing. What would be a good, fair price for her? I was thinking €150-175.

    I want to pay her something fair, but I don't want her trying to overcharge either, if I get a general feel for what is fair I can put those cards on the table.

    I should mention it is only 1 child, who is 2 and a half, he is in bed from 8 each night, I am proud to say :)


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    #2
    Fittle
    Registered Users Posts: 2,775 ✭✭✭Fittle


    I think you would want to be clinically insane to pay anywhere close to 150euro!

    How old is the person who's minding your child? Is it an older teenager?
    Are they being put out or out of pocket in any way by minding your child?


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    #3
    January
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,862 ✭✭✭✭January


    I think 150 is fair for that. I'd do it for you if it was feasible? I'm assuming wedding is in the country though? And I mean for free of course!


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    #4
    January
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,862 ✭✭✭✭January


    150 really is minimum considering it's overnight


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    #5
    Ayla
    Registered Users Posts: 1,508 ✭✭✭Ayla


    My initial thought was €150 was way too much, but doing some sums:

    3-8pm @ €8/hr
    8pm-8am @ €4/hr
    8am - 4pm @ €8/hr

    Total: €152

    So €150's not too bad...shocking to think of it though.


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    #6
    Moonbeam
    Moderators, Education Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 18,953 Mod ✭✭✭✭Moonbeam


    I would either get someone that you know that lives near to mind him or bring a cousin or sibling you trust and pay for their hotel room.

    I think it is selfish to invite him to be page boy but not invite him to the hotel.
    We are lucky that I have never paid anyone to look after my girls besides the creche.
    If it s anywhere near me let me know!


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    #7
    Fittle
    Registered Users Posts: 2,775 ✭✭✭Fittle


    Well I think it's very unrealistic!

    I've a 9year old and pay for every bit of childcare he's had since I returned to work when he was one (thankfully I have great neighbours now though, and can avail of sleepovers). Even for the odd overnight when I was paying someone, I certainly wouldn't have paid them 4euro an hour for the 12 hours he was asleep!
    I think 50 - 75euro is enough -if not too much - to be paying this person considering the fact that the OP is providing them with extra money for a meal and food in the fridge.

    With respect girls, accepting that one hundred and fifty euro is the right price to pay to mind a 2 yr old overnight is the attitude that drove creche prices way over the odds in the boom!! There are registered childminders minding children for 40 hours in a week and not getting 150euro!!


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    #8
    Moonbeam
    Moderators, Education Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 18,953 Mod ✭✭✭✭Moonbeam


    "There are registered childminders minding children for 40 hours in a week and not getting 150euro!! "
    That is their choice,they choose what to charge.
    A once off job is always paid more then a regular job.

    There are a lot of things that caused creche fees to go up,insurance and meeting hse requirements been the main ones.

    What I think is terrible is people charging to keep the child overnight and not just offering to do it.


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    #9
    Ayla
    Registered Users Posts: 1,508 ✭✭✭Ayla


    Well, alright, forget the overnight time. The minder will still be actively involved with the child for 13 hours...depending on what you'd pay per hour, that can easily get up to €65-€100.

    I think it is selfish to invite him to be page boy but not invite him to the hotel.
    The OP never said the child wasn't invited.


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    #10
    Fittle
    Registered Users Posts: 2,775 ✭✭✭Fittle


    Moonbeam wrote: »
    "

    What I think is terrible is people charging to keep the child overnight and not just offering to do it.

    Agreed!


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    #11
    Fittle
    Registered Users Posts: 2,775 ✭✭✭Fittle


    Moonbeam wrote: »
    "

    There are a lot of things that caused creche fees to go up,insurance and meeting hse requirements been the main ones.

    I agree with that too - but I also think we are all to blame for accepting the 1000pm and higher fees - creches still make massive profits.


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    #12
    January
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,862 ✭✭✭✭January


    Ayla wrote: »
    Well, alright, forget the overnight time. The minder will still be actively involved with the child for 13 hours...depending on what you'd pay per hour, that can easily get up to €65-€100.



    The OP never said the child wasn't invited.

    Knowing the op the child is not invited to the afters, the bride actually does not want him there


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    #13
    Ayla
    Registered Users Posts: 1,508 ✭✭✭Ayla


    Well that's a different kettle of fish...


    Some schools of thought would say that if a child's included in the wedding but not the festivities (at the request of the bridal party) then it's good form for said bridal party to pay for the childcare. I've seen this done by having a babysitter for the kids for the evening (then at least one of the parents would take care of the kids from late on).

    Not saying this is necessarily what should be done in this case. If the OP is happy enough to sort the childcare herself then so be it. But personally I would think at least €5/hr would be appropriate, bringing the minimum childcare cost to €65.


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    #14
    Fittle
    Registered Users Posts: 2,775 ✭✭✭Fittle


    January wrote: »
    Knowing the op the child is not invited to the afters, the bride actually does not want him there

    But he's pageboy:confused: She doesn't want him after the church?
    Some people:mad:


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    #15
    deisemum
    Registered Users Posts: 5,588 ✭✭✭deisemum


    Is there anyone you trust that your son knows who might be willing to take him for the night who wouldn't expect payment and that you can reciprocate the same at a later date?

    If you are paying then I reckon at the very least €100 maybe upto €150 if you can afford it as it's a long time. For me personally I'd want to make sure I got someone I could trust and had experience so would reflect that in their payment.

    I've seen some people who have no problem spending a lot of money on an outfit, hair and fake tan/make-up and a lot on alcohol but would begrudge paying someone to look after their children no matter how reasonable it is.


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    #16
    Lola92
    Registered Users Posts: 2,192 ✭✭✭Lola92


    Wolfpawnat I would be fairly annoyed at that if I were you. :mad:

    I'd say a fair rate would be about €90/100. I would've been delighted with that for a days work when I was babysitting!


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    #17
    wolfpawnat
    Registered Users Posts: 6,124 ✭✭✭wolfpawnat


    Moonbeam wrote: »
    I think it is selfish to invite him to be page boy but not invite him to the hotel.
    We are lucky that I have never paid anyone to look after my girls besides the creche.
    If it s anywhere near me let me know!

    Thanks a million Moonbeam, unfortunately the wedding is in Clare so I will be needing someone down here for it.

    It is a right pain that I cannot get a member of my family to mind him, but that is a totally different kettle of fish.
    Fittle wrote: »
    But he's pageboy:confused: She doesn't want him after the church?
    Some people:mad:

    She doesn't want him their either, he is going up the aisle and then has to be removed from church as he "will embarrass her on her big day"
    deisemum wrote: »
    If you are paying then I reckon at the very least €100 maybe upto €150 if you can afford it as it's a long time. For me personally I'd want to make sure I got someone I could trust and had experience so would reflect that in their payment.

    The person minding the child is highly experienced and works 5 days a week in a creche. She is in her late 30's early 40's and has years of exp and first aid training so I see her as worth the few bob.


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    #18
    deisemum
    Registered Users Posts: 5,588 ✭✭✭deisemum


    wolfpawnat wrote: »

    She doesn't want him their either, he is going up the aisle and then has to be removed from church as he "will embarrass her on her big day"

    That's shocking, Bridezilla on overdrive.


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    #19
    wolfpawnat
    Registered Users Posts: 6,124 ✭✭✭wolfpawnat


    deisemum wrote: »
    That's shocking, Bridezilla on overdrive.

    Seriously I could just pull him out of the wedding, but she has nothing done for it and the imminent break down and farcical day is going to be good to miss (she is bringing out the bítch in me)


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    #20
    Shelli2
    Registered Users Posts: 928 ✭✭✭Shelli2


    I would attend the wedding yourself, and leave the child with a friend or family in Dublin (if that is where you live??) if possible.

    The bloody cheek of that bride, jesus, if the child would 'embarress' her, then she doesn't deserve to have him there at all.

    Watch the break down, point and laugh, and save yourself the hassle and expense of getting a childminder in a place away from home!


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    #21
    jenni68
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1 ✭jenni68


    could you or you oh not skip the wedding and you and you go and have a good night out instead,dont think i would want to be there if my child was good enough to be in the wedding photos, but not good enough to be at the wedding.hope it goes well for you:)


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    #22
    Kildrought
    Registered Users Posts: 381 ✭✭Kildrought


    the bride actually does not want him there
    Obviously I don't know the people involved and there could be a lot more to this story, but that has to be the most miserable, mean-minded thing I've seen yet.


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    #23
    Ayla
    Registered Users Posts: 1,508 ✭✭✭Ayla


    deisemum wrote: »
    That's shocking, Bridezilla on overdrive.
    wolfpawnat wrote: »
    ...but she has nothing done for it and the imminent break down and farcical day is going to be good to miss...
    Shelli2 wrote: »
    ...Watch the break down, point and laugh...


    Wow folks, caddy much? :rolleyes:

    Personally, I was more than happy to have kids at my wedding, but I think nothing against those who don't. Kids can be disruptive, bored at such events & distracting for everyone - especially the parents who would love to relax & enjoy themselves but instead have to chase junior around the place. For those who would like to have a mature, sophisticated (ie: what some would define as "perfect") wedding, the unpredictability of children just doesn't fit in. Of course, the more honourable thing would be to be up front with all the families instead of using the child for one thing & then refusing him the rest, but that is the bride's decision & the parent's choice to agree to.

    OP - it's clearly your choice whether or not you involve your son at all with this event, but the point of this thread was the cost of the related childminding.


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    #24
    wolfpawnat
    Registered Users Posts: 6,124 ✭✭✭wolfpawnat


    She is my partners sister, my son is the only grandchild in the family and one of her Godchildren. She is a middle aged harpy who is marrying the only man desperate enough to actually bring her up the aisle. Sorry I know that is mean to say, but she stated she wanted a family photo of just the immediate family, my son is not to be included. Apparently he is not part of the "Enter Surname" family, just an extension (though he has his fathers Surname). Thankfully my sons father went absolutely mental at this and lay into her saying our son is more a member of the family than she is.

    She doesn't want him there because he is a toddler and like all toddlers he is prone to tantrums and he may make noise during the ceremony and embarrass her in front of her "important" friends (these are the same friends that told me I was selfish for not aborting him). And he has a tendency to want what other people are eating and as a result he shares food from others plates which is unacceptable as far as she is concerned!


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    #25
    Ayla
    Registered Users Posts: 1,508 ✭✭✭Ayla


    So why are you involving your son at all with this event? If you know clearly what she thinks of him, and she doesn't want him there at all (she's just bowing to family pressure) then wouldn't it just be the mature thing to do to protect him from the negativity & leave him at home where he can play happily for the weekend?

    I can guarantee you that if someone - family or no - thought that about my children I would not expose them to that person. I would also seriously question my own motives for involving myself in the event.


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    #26
    Fittle
    Registered Users Posts: 2,775 ✭✭✭Fittle


    I have to agree with Ayla - why are you even bringing him to this wedding?
    I would be highly annoyed and insulted if she wanted him removed from the church after the wedding - there's no way I'd bring the child at all if that was the case!!!

    I do understand why some people don't want children at weddings (wouldn't do it myself and would always include the kids, but that's just me) but to want him to dress up for her photos (I assume) but to exclude him from everything else??? She has a cheek:eek:


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    #27
    Moonbeam
    Moderators, Education Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 18,953 Mod ✭✭✭✭Moonbeam


    wolfpawnat wrote: »
    She is my partners sister, my son is the only grandchild in the family and one of her Godchildren. She is a middle aged harpy who is marrying the only man desperate enough to actually bring her up the aisle. Sorry I know that is mean to say, but she stated she wanted a family photo of just the immediate family, my son is not to be included. Apparently he is not part of the "Enter Surname" family, just an extension (though he has his fathers Surname). Thankfully my sons father went absolutely mental at this and lay into her saying our son is more a member of the family than she is.

    She doesn't want him there because he is a toddler and like all toddlers he is prone to tantrums and he may make noise during the ceremony and embarrass her in front of her "important" friends (these are the same friends that told me I was selfish for not aborting him). And he has a tendency to want what other people are eating and as a result he shares food from others plates which is unacceptable as far as she is concerned!

    You had me laughing reading the reply:)
    she sounds like a horrible piece of work.
    I fully understand not wanting kids at a wedding but if he such an embarrassment then he should be completely excluded and not invited to be a page boy.
    I think that if you go that you should leave him at home completely and if there are any comments relay her feelings to her.


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