I need a girlfriend/help.

RichieC

Samich wrote: »

Ok, basically I'm an early 20's fella, absolutely awful with women.

I go out quite regularly but haven't the testicle fortitude to approach women.

I don't have a good body and have never felt a girl has been interested in me.

I have approached a few women before in clubs asking how their night is but most just shrugged me away.

There is a girl I like but don't we well, doesn't mean she likes me. I've met her once, but chat alot on facebook (me always starting the chat). I don't think she likes me, she's just very friendly I think, no hints or anything from her.

Near the end of the club I always feel depressed when I think I'm absolute failure with girls.

What do ye think of telling that one girl? Good/bad idea? Don't want to ruin the friendship or make it awkward, her friend added me on fb aswell, I hadn't met her before.

Or else I need something to take my mind off women as I'm always thinking about it.

you gotta know your target audience, I wouldnt walk up to a super model and ask her for a lick out.. no, I would ask her middle of the road/okay mate if she would she like a drink.

El Weirdo

Coffeeteasugar wrote: »

Be yourself, genuine and not just in pursuit of one thing..

Exactly. You want to be going for tits and fanny.

RichieC

Coffeeteasugar wrote: »

Be yourself, genuine and not just in pursuit of one thing..

That depends, what if you're a complete cnut?

Wolfe Tone

RichieC wrote: »

That depends, what if you're a complete cnut?

Make sure you are a rich cnut!

starlit

OP, Its All about confidence, suck it up and be a man and man up...women like a guy with confidence! Once you ain't too cocky and full of one self that make you look insecure or self centred. You can fool women that you are confident when you aren't really...it does happen!? Say something simple and friendly to break the ice, no innuendos, smiling and being happy will draw the ladies, if you enjoy life and enjoy your company how can a girl enjoy your company then? Reverse psychology - 'Would you chat you up??' Change the way you are thinking, be positive no negative thoughts, keep positive and ladies will be attracted to that.

Keep yourself active too, you don't need to look like a hot celebrity or anything but be yourself, believe in yourself, personality wins out over looks. You just have to show that off and make yourself stand out from the crowd and make yourself shine. You got to make the girl you approach think 'there is something about you and she wants to find out more, what makes you special, oh I like to approach him and so on'. Standing out like a muppet won't get a girl if you have negative energy floating about you, she pick up that. Don't expect anything if there are sparks great if not don't expect things to just happen they happen in good time. Leave it up to the girl to decide if she wants to move things along don't put the pressure on her. Just act like no care in the world, go with the flow you be seen as carefree and not like other guys.

IPushButtons

A lot of people are talking about confedance so i've take the liberty of setting up a new identity for you.

Name: Pennybags Monopoly (aka the monoply guy bitches love the monoply guy )
FB profile picture : http://thepoliticalcarnival.net/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/monopoly-man.jpg

Pastimes: Bankrupting people

MrStuffins

IPushButtons wrote: »

A lot of people are talking about confedance so i've take the liberty of setting up a new identity for you.

Name: Pennybags Monopoly (aka the monoply guy bitches love the monoply guy )
FB profile picture : http://thepoliticalcarnival.net/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/monopoly-man.jpg

Pastimes: Bankrupting people

Pastimes: Gettin' dat money

That's better IMO

Panty_thief

feckin women - too choosy.

if they were the ones approaching - id be like fine ok no big deal, make use of my weiner for 30 mins, no hassle, drinks, or lines. (as long as youre not a total mingbag, and even then i might even be charitable)

Locust

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZgoC7Wa7e_M

Goose81

Samich wrote: »

Ok, basically I'm an early 20's fella, absolutely awful with women.

I go out quite regularly but haven't the testicle fortitude to approach women.

I don't have a good body and have never felt a girl has been interested in me.

I have approached a few women before in clubs asking how their night is but most just shrugged me away.

There is a girl I like but don't we well, doesn't mean she likes me. I've met her once, but chat alot on facebook (me always starting the chat). I don't think she likes me, she's just very friendly I think, no hints or anything from her.

Near the end of the club I always feel depressed when I think I'm absolute failure with girls.

What do ye think of telling that one girl? Good/bad idea? Don't want to ruin the friendship or make it awkward, her friend added me on fb aswell, I hadn't met her before.

Or else I need something to take my mind off women as I'm always thinking about it.

Lose some weight and drink more when your in the club, sorted!

MrStuffins

Panty_thief wrote: »

feckin women - too choosy.

if they were the ones approaching - id be like fine ok no big deal, make use of my weiner for 30 mins, no hassle, drinks, or lines. (as long as youre not a total mingbag, and even then i might even be charitable)

And what are they supposed to be doing with it for the OTHER 27.5 minutes then?

alcomoholic

head out tonight, drink at least a litre of vodka.
then come home, head out the back garden and hang yourself off your fathers ladder in the shed.

leave a note for the girl telling her that you loved her so much you gave your life for her.
she'll be kneeling down in front of you in no time.... you'll be six feet under, but who cares!

HazDanz

alcomoholic wrote: »

head out tonight, drink at least a litre of vodka.
then come home, head out the back garden and hang yourself off your fathers ladder in the shed.

leave a note for the girl telling her that you loved her so much you gave your life for her.
she'll be kneeling down in front of you in no time.... you'll be six feet under, but who cares!

F*cking Hell!!

Samich

alcomoholic wrote: »

head out tonight, drink at least a litre of vodka.
then come home, head out the back garden and hang yourself off your fathers ladder in the shed.

leave a note for the girl telling her that you loved her so much you gave your life for her.
she'll be kneeling down in front of you in no time.... you'll be six feet under, but who cares!

ehh

Panty_thief

MrStuffins wrote: »

And what are they supposed to be doing with it for the OTHER 27.5 minutes then?

waiting for it to recharge.

BlueNemo

Samich wrote: »

Ok, basically I'm an early 20's fella, absolutely awful with women.

I go out quite regularly but haven't the testicle fortitude to approach women.

I don't have a good body and have never felt a girl has been interested in me.

I have approached a few women before in clubs asking how their night is but most just shrugged me away.

There is a girl I like but don't we well, doesn't mean she likes me. I've met her once, but chat alot on facebook (me always starting the chat). I don't think she likes me, she's just very friendly I think, no hints or anything from her.

Near the end of the club I always feel depressed when I think I'm absolute failure with girls.

What do ye think of telling that one girl? Good/bad idea? Don't want to ruin the friendship or make it awkward, her friend added me on fb aswell, I hadn't met her before.

Or else I need something to take my mind off women as I'm always thinking about it.

Relax . Just because you haven't found a girl to take home after a night out doesn't make you a failure. I've also found clubs just to be filled with boring guys looking for one thing, and it's hardly intellegent conversation:rolleyes:. Have you tried chatting to girls outside of a club-scene? Find a group of people with similiar hobbies, broaden your friend circle a little bit.

Please God don't tell a girl on facebook chat that you like her, she'll probably feel like she's been put on the spot and wouldn't have a clue what to say to you. I would hate to be thrown into that kind of situation! How about trying to spend more time with her 'IRL'?

If all else fails - I'm a 20 year old girl, and totally awful with guys. Wanna start a self-help group? :pac:

Sinfonia

alcomoholic wrote: »

head out tonight, drink at least a litre of vodka.
then come home, head out the back garden and hang yourself off your fathers ladder in the shed.

leave a note for the girl telling her that you loved her so much you gave your life for her.
she'll be kneeling down in front of you in no time.... you'll be six feet under, but who cares!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=37OWL7AzvHo

Samich

I'm afraid I'm not heading out tonight, dislocated a shoulder so no out.

Larianne

Samich wrote: »

I'm afraid I'm not heading out tonight, dislocated a shoulder so no out.

Should be studying any how!

MrStuffins

BlueNemo wrote: »

If all else fails - I'm a 20 year old girl, and totally awful with guys. Wanna start a self-help group? :pac:

Samich wrote: »

I'm afraid I'm not heading out tonight, dislocated a shoulder so no out.

You've just blown it dude! Try again!

IPushButtons

alcomoholic wrote: »

head out tonight, drink at least a litre of vodka.
then come home, head out the back garden and hang yourself off your fathers ladder in the shed.

leave a note for the girl telling her that you loved her so much you gave your life for her.
she'll be kneeling down in front of you in no time.... you'll be six feet under, but who cares!

Banned ??

IPushButtons

MrStuffins wrote: »

You've just blown it dude! Try again!

Thats an in if i ever seen one

Snakeblood

Samich wrote: »

Ok, basically I'm an early 20's fella, absolutely awful with women.

I go out quite regularly but haven't the testicle fortitude to approach women.

I don't have a good body and have never felt a girl has been interested in me.

I have approached a few women before in clubs asking how their night is but most just shrugged me away.

There is a girl I like but don't we well, doesn't mean she likes me. I've met her once, but chat alot on facebook (me always starting the chat). I don't think she likes me, she's just very friendly I think, no hints or anything from her.

Near the end of the club I always feel depressed when I think I'm absolute failure with girls.

What do ye think of telling that one girl? Good/bad idea? Don't want to ruin the friendship or make it awkward, her friend added me on fb aswell, I hadn't met her before.

Or else I need something to take my mind off women as I'm always thinking about it.

This was me exactly 15 years ago. Mind you, I'm still ****e with women, but I'm married now, so possibly that's good. The important thing for me was it not mattering a **** whether I met someone or not. Just go do things and it will hopefully happen organically. If that doesn't work, try speed dating (I've never done it myself, but I know some girls who did, to develop a thick skin about actual proper dating).

mikemac

Look around the pub or party OP
Too many lads in the corner staring into their pint like their dog just died and then wondering why they're not attracting anyone

As said "would you chat you up?"

You don't need to be good looking and it's not just your Mammy who will tell you that
If you get people laughing you're halfway there

Tbh, you're putting a lot of pressure on yourself going to a pub or nightclub where you have to shout over music and it's pretty likely to be shot down

Thinking back on people I've been with were college, a night class or once I signed up to tennis classes on my own and met a girl there

While I've not done it I've heard great things about dancing classes like tango dancing,
Girls love to dance so you show up and have the craic

mikemac

alcomoholic wrote: »

head out tonight, drink at least a litre of vodka.
then come home, head out the back garden and hang yourself off your fathers ladder in the shed.

leave a note for the girl telling her that you loved her so much you gave your life for her.
she'll be kneeling down in front of you in no time.... you'll be six feet under, but who cares!

What's disturbing about this post is young men actually do this

That realy is a disturbing post

Sinfonia

Samich, can I assume that when you deal with people generally, like shopkeepers, sales assistants, delivery people, whatever, you handle the situation quickly with the bare minimum of speech and interaction? I've always been the same way. With friends, totally fine, talkative, confident etc. With strangers, shy, distant, quiet. I would recommend changing that for a start. You don't need to get into a full blown conversation with everyone you meet, but just say something, any auld shi'e, or even just make the most basic of small talk, with your head up, making eye contact (don't stare though!).

I honestly think that the effort to increase levels of confidence when it comes to talking to girls takes two things:
1) Increasing the level of confidence when talking to anyone (as above)
2) Realising that girls are just people, not goddesses (certain cases excepted :P ), and step 1 helps with that too.

mikemac

Are you working OP?
Tag rugby is great for meeting the wimmins
If you don't have a team set one up

Jobs are scare but maybe get yourself a barman job at the weekends, some extra cash for you and you'll be out meeting people

Wolfe Tone

Chances are the problem is that you don't actually have fun when you are out, you go out with the aim of scoring and become increasingly more desperate as you come towards the end of an unsuccessful night and start to beat yourself up.

You should forget about trying to get a woman or whatever, and just go out for the craic. Chances are you will realize that night clubs generally suck. What I would do would be to join some clubs and stuff, like Irish classes, or something which you enjoy. You will be more relaxed, have more fun and feel less pressured when meeting new people, and who knows what might happen! It's obvious what you are doing now isn't working, so you need a change.

Don Juan DeMagoo

Samich wrote: »

Anyone have any experience of telling a girl they liked them without any clear signals?

Oh god yes and more often than not it goes down like the Hindenburg disaster.
But over time you will improve, just try not to do this in front of her mates, try to corral her on her own. In groups, women can (sometimes) behave like sheep. If you scare one they are all gone, but just remember you are a talented sheep dog. On a final note don't bite her, if you do we will be left with no option other than to put you down. :pac:

Don Juan DeMagoo

RichieC wrote: »

you gotta know your target audience, I wouldnt walk up to a super model and ask her for a lick out.. no, I would ask her middle of the road/okay mate if she would she like a drink.

Deep stuff