Neighbours outside windows

Winnie

Firstly, not sure if in right place, feel free to move mods........anyway, we live in a ground floor apartment with double doors opening onto a terrace. We have two cats that sleep outisde on the terrace.
Every day, at least once or twice, there is a woman with her toddler that comes over to our balcony to let the child see the cats. This is really starting to annoy me as she stands right outside our windows with the child and sometimes comes right up to our terrace.....I know she is only showing the cats to her child but this is our private home and dont like strangers being so close to our windows.......plus the cats dont enjoy it! What should I say, if anything...Am I being unreasonable?

mikemac

Children grab tails, poke eyes and handle pets roughly
And then the parents are shocked and over react when the pet lashes out and scratches. But realy, it was the childs fault

Is the toddler just looking at the cats or petting them?

listermint

Em,

1)Either Say it to her.

2)Keep the cats indoors

3)Dont keep cats.


Your choice, but choose wisely...............

Justask

Winnie wrote: »

Firstly, not sure if in right place, feel free to move mods........anyway, we live in a ground floor apartment with double doors opening onto a terrace. We have two cats that sleep outisde on the terrace.
Every day, at least once or twice, there is a woman with her toddler that comes over to our balcony to let the child see the cats. This is really starting to annoy me as she stands right outside our windows with the child and sometimes comes right up to our terrace.....I know she is only showing the cats to her child but this is our private home and dont like strangers being so close to our windows.......plus the cats dont enjoy it! What should I say, if anything...Am I being unreasonable?

How long do she spend there? surely only a couple of mins?

mikom

Go to your nearest joke shop.
Buy a blow-up female sex doll.
Take it home, blow it up, and tie it to a deck chair on your terrace.
Woman with her toddler ...... no more.

Winnie

yeah she spends about 5 mins, but it is every day and sometimes more than once, I just turn around and she her standing outside the windows and I can see that she is trying to have a look to see if anyone is home so she is aware that she is very close to my apartment....I just feel that just because I have two cats outside that it doesnt give people the right to come up to my private house like that.......other people do it sometimes too but not as much as her.

Winnie

mikemac wrote: »

Children grab tails, poke eyes and handle pets roughly
And then the parents are shocked and over react when the pet lashes out and scratches. But realy, it was the childs fault

Is the toddler just looking at the cats or petting them?

The cats are behind the glass in the balcony railings so she cant actually touch them.

Winnie

listermint wrote: »

Em,

1)Either Say it to her.

2)Keep the cats indoors

3)Dont keep cats.


Your choice, but choose wisely...............

The cats are outdoor cats and I am certainly not going to get rid of them because people cant stay away from our apartment.....other people do it too but not as much as her.......it doesnt give people the right to come so close to my private home just because I have cats.

Justask

Winnie wrote: »

yeah she spends about 5 mins, but it is every day and sometimes more than once, I just turn around and she her standing outside the windows and I can see that she is trying to have a look to see if anyone is home so she is aware that she is very close to my apartment....I just feel that just because I have two cats outside that it doesnt give people the right to come up to my private house like that.......other people do it sometimes too but not as much as her.

To be honest I really cant see the big deal, its 5 mins. She is your neighbour. Im sure she doesnt think its any harm. I have neighbours all the time stopping to say hello to my pets.

An advantage to this is at least if you get called away for a night at short notice you know that you could ask her to keep an eye on the cats or feed them

listermint

Winnie wrote: »

The cats are outdoor cats and I am certainly not going to get rid of them because people cant stay away from our apartment.....other people do it too but not as much as her.......it doesnt give people the right to come so close to my private home just because I have cats.

So...

2 and 3 are out.

Em i think you may be left with 1 option then.

'Hi can you stay away from my balcony you and your child are freaking me out'


Additionally whats the point in out door cats? At least you can walk an outdoor dog. They sound like they are leeching off you. :cool:

The Scientician

Time to start wearing clothes when you're watching telly.

Winnie

well i should be able to watch telly naked if i please... :-)

I would like to say something to her but not sure how to put it without sounding like a cranky arse.

listermint

Winnie wrote: »

well i should be able to watch telly naked if i please... :-)

I would like to say something to her but not sure how to put it without sounding like a cranky arse.

Say it naked. With a smile .... Your guaranteed never to see her again

Winnie

I dont like it because she is right outside my window, I dont know her, she is a stranger and dont like strangers outside my windows! She is not a close neighbour Im not sure which block of apartments she lives in. If i had a garden out front of a normal house and she was stopping outside the front of the garden, that would be different as she wouldnt be right outside my windows then.

Winnie

Anyone any helpful advice! :-)

I am a friend

Winnie wrote: »

I dont like it because she is right outside my window, I dont know her, she is a stranger and dont like strangers outside my windows! n.

Oh for gods sake. She is showing her kids the cats... How do you know the cats don like it?

You choose to live surrounded by people but you dont want them to look at your property. You need to buy a site in the middle if nowhere and build a moat and a house in the middle...

listermint

Winnie wrote: »

Anyone any helpful advice! :-)

Well not really, You either talk to her and express your concerns or you put up blinds and ignore it.

There is no special fix formula to be fair. No one can go around and solve the problem for you.

Winnie

I am a friend wrote: »

Oh for gods sake. She is showing her kids the cats... How do you know the cats don like it?

You choose to live surrounded by people but you dont want them to look at your property. You need to buy a site in the middle if nowhere and build a moat and a house in the middle...

I know the cats dont like it because they run away and hid!
And who wants people to come up to their windows and look at their property?? Are you saying you wouldnt care if people where standing right outside your windows?!

Justask

Winnie wrote: »

I know the cats dont like it because they run away and hid!
And who wants people to come up to their windows and look at their property?? Are you saying you wouldnt care if people where standing right outside your windows?!

I wouldnt mind at all if their intentions are to say hello to my pets and to put a smile on the toddlers face for 5 mins. The cats are not in danger

I am a friend

Justask wrote: »

I wouldnt mind at all if their intentions are to say hello to my pets and to put a smile on the toddlers face for 5 mins. The cats are not in danger

I wouldn't mind at all either...

Why do you have cats if only to leave them out on a terrace? Do they roam? Who cleans up their droppings??? Sounds like the cats like people as much as the owners do!!

Seriously is this a big deal for you? Wish I had your problems. If you ask her to stop showing her child your cats, pretty soon she will have the whole neighbourhood talking about the crazy cat lady.

Janet1986

Do you have a back garden? If yes let the cats out there.

Only other thing is keep the cats in during the day and let them out around the evening when the toddler would be in bed.

It reminds me of our neighbours westie, he had two kids going into the drive way to pet him last week. The dog was terrified and the owners weren't there.

The big thing here is and like your cats what if the dog/cats attacked the child out of fear. Everyone would be outraged but the fact is the people stepped on your property without your permission!

not even wrong

Winnie wrote: »

Am I being unreasonable?

Yes. The child wants to see the kitties and is not trespassing on your property, get over it.

C-J

I have a toddler and I guarantee this lady doesn't intentionally set out to stare in your windows, it's more a case of toddlers not forgetting anything and just loving animals. I guarantee as soon as they leave the house the baby wants to see the cats. When i saw title of your issue i thought it'd be antisocial neighbours but For gods sake you're the one coming across as antisocial!

ilikepears

C-J wrote: »

I have a toddler and I guarantee this lady doesn't intentionally set out to stare in your windows, it's more a case of toddlers not forgetting anything and just loving animals. I guarantee as soon as they leave the house the baby wants to see the cats. When i saw title of your issue i thought it'd be antisocial neighbours but For gods sake you're the one coming across as antisocial!

Yeah that's so true about toddlers. I remember I used to mind a family friends child when they were this age and anytime we went outside he wanted to go see if one of his neighbours was using his digger (the neighbour was doing some work on his house at the time). So I used to take him over there to see and the best view was amongst the trees just across from the neighbour. I used to be very embarrassed about this, standing there awkwardly looking but luckily the neighbour never minded. The mother of this child is probably feeling a little bit embarrassed like me but its probably easier for her just to show her child your cats.

Miss Fluff

I'd say the little one is just obsessed with the cats and asks to see them every day. She probably asks about twenty times a day actually until her Mum brings her out. It's actually very very cute

I think you're being a bit precious. The lady stands outside looking at the cats with her toddler for a few minutes every day. I sincerely doubt she's casing the joint or wanting to see your interior design. It's innocent enough and they are not doing any harm.

Having a "word" will make you look anally retentive and rather mean-spirited tbh, I'd just leave it be. They genuinely aren't doing you any harm....

Baralis1

Does the terrace belong to you? If the woman and her child are not trespassing on your property then there isn't much that you can do about it except close your curtains. That's one disadvantage about owning a ground floor property that people can walk right up to your windows.

You can say it to her and ask her not to approach your apartment but she's under absolutely no obligation to comply if she doesn't want it and you will be at a high risk of sounding like a "cranky arse" as you put it.

If she and the child are not actually touching the cats behind a glass pane, then there is very little complaint that you can make about her interfereing with the cats.

If it was me, I would just grin and bear it and perhaps put up those old fashioned net curtains or those strip blinds to protect my privacy as much as possible.

Distorted

Its probably part of their daily walk or something and just a happy thing they do together. How can you object to such a small thing from such innocents for only 5 minutes a couple of times a day? Do they make a terrible racket? Do they trespass on your property?

I'm guessing they are on the public path while they do this and you can't really stop someone going on a public path and looking at someone, unless it amounts to harassment. (I'd like you to persuade the guards to investigate a case of a woman letting a toddler look at cats is harassment).

That leave you to take action yourself. You complain she is a stranger, in which case you could introduce yourself and maybe drop tactfully into the conversation that you get a bit of a fright when people stop by your window to look at the cats. You could keep the windows closed, since living at ground floor level with them opens seems to unsettle you. You could get out a bit more so small things have less influence on you. You could move somewhere more isolated or remote where you won't be plagued by women and toddlers?

Otherwise, it doesn't seem that much to get so bothered about. And you don't seem to have tried any of the obvious solutions.

ted1

I think the op is entitled to some privacy I know I wouldn't appreciate a neighbour looking in my window particular when I'm making the love whcich the op may do from time to time

woodchuck

I’m surprised by all the negative responses here! I’ve been in a similar situation and while it’s not the end of the world, it very irritating, especially if it’s happening so regularly. For me I’d have the window/door open a crack to let air into the bedroom and then little kids come right up to the windows and stick their hands in to pet the cat!!! I haven’t had the heart to scare them away, but it really is so irritating. Especially since I like to lounge around in my PJs when in the apartment or I might just be out of the shower and still in a towel or something.

Nothing’s going to change unless you talk to the woman. So either you tell her the truth and ask her to stop or you could make something up to scare her away… like that the cats have fleas or something :P

Neyite

Op, Get window blinds.

woodchuck

Neyite wrote: »

Op, Get window blinds.

You suggest she constantly has the blinds/curtains closed? Hardly ideal to never have natural light in her own apartment...