Bed for daddy but not for mammy

elvis jones

Our 2 year old is normally great at going to bed. We have routine and he goes when he is told its bed time.

BUT lately he won't go for my wife, just me. My mother in law lives with us as well and he won't go for her either.

I leave for work every day and she is on maternity leave so that leads me to a train of thought. When i leave i come back.........he sees that every day. If his mammy leaves he isn't sure will she come back. He just gets out of bed and shouts and screams. I go up and within 30 sec he's in bed and all is fine.

If i'm not there she has to bring him down stairs and let him fall asleep on her knee.

We really want to nip this in the butt as she is going back to work soon and life will be even busier.

Any thoughts would be great.

Cat Melodeon

Make sure you and your wife are doing exactly the same things in the bed-time wind-down - follow the same steps every night (eg change into pjs, brush teeth, read story, goodnight kiss and into bed). Maybe do it together a couple of times to make sure ye are on the same page. Then get her to do it alone until he settles. At two, he should be able to settle himself and he has learned that if he acts up his mam will bring him downstairs. When he cries, she should leave him for 10 mins, then go in and put him lying down, saying firmly 'go to sleep, goodnight', and leave the room without saying anything else. Leave it a bit longer next time, and the next time, but don't give in, he has to learn that he must stay in his bed. I don't like 'cry it out' techniques for little kids, but as your 2-yr old will go to bed for you and not for mammy, it suggests he's a clever one who's learned who's the soft touch!

elvis jones

Cat Melodeon wrote: »

Make sure you and your wife are doing exactly the same things in the bed-time wind-down - follow the same steps every night (eg change into pjs, brush teeth, read story, goodnight kiss and into bed). Maybe do it together a couple of times to make sure ye are on the same page. Then get her to do it alone until he settles. At two, he should be able to settle himself and he has learned that if he acts up his mam will bring him downstairs. When he cries, she should leave him for 10 mins, then go in and put him lying down, saying firmly 'go to sleep, goodnight', and leave the room without saying anything else. Leave it a bit longer next time, and the next time, but don't give in, he has to learn that he must stay in his bed. I don't like 'cry it out' techniques for little kids, but as your 2-yr old will go to bed for you and not for mammy, it suggests he's a clever one who's learned who's the soft touch!

Oh she does, its the same every night and Oso is at the centre of it:)

We do leave him and let him shout but as you say when it becomes just crying we go up to him and try to get him to go back down.

Perhaps both of us should bring him up to see how it goes and i leave so she is the one who actaully lays him down and puts teddy beside him.

cbyrd

Our little lad is 20 months and about 2 months ago he did this for about 3 weeks.. daddy had to do bedtime.. it was a phase he went through i wasn't even allowed to get up off the couch to leave the room. . there were 2 nights in a row where my husband wasn't home before bedtime and i had to bring him up. . he fussed for a few minutes but it was clear to him i was the only one in the house to bring him to bed .. he's fine for either of us now .. might pass for you

Chesty LaRue

Sounds like "Daddyitis"
My little lad has a touch of it at the moment....My first went through a phase too.."No Daddy will, Daddy will"....it will pass

part time punk

Our daughter went through a bit of a Mammy phase when around 2 years old about 6 months ago, still does occassionally but not so much now. But if I had to do bedtime if my wife was out she'd be fine.