Awful Song Lyrics

Fieldies Dreams

"everywhere you go,always take the weather with you"

good song but makes no sense!!

ImpossibleDuck

CorsetIsTight wrote: »

"I got soul, but I'm not a soldier."

Seriously...?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C7HieAZ-5gg

CapriSunFun

Behold the lyrics of Ke$ha;

"Your love, your love, your love, is my drug. I like your beard"

"Dont be a little b!tch with your chit chat, just show me where your d!ck's at"

Christ.

Forest Master

Anything by Black Eyed Peas.

Paparazzo

Forest Master wrote: »

Anything by Black Eyed Peas.

Surely not I Gotta Feeling:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kg_htYz7Wmk

lway

Though I like them, you gotta wonder what the Presidents of the USA meant:

Lump sat alone in a boggy marsh
Totally motionless except for her heart
Mud flowed up into lump's pyjammas
She totally confused all the passing piranhas
She's lump she's lump
She's in my head
She's lump she's lump she's lump
She might be dead
Lump lingered last in line for brains
And the ones she got were sorta rotten and insane
Small thing's so sad that birds could land
Is lump fast asleep or rockin' out with the band

Teutorix

Are we human or are we dancers?
My sign is vital, my hands are cold
And I'm on my knees looking for the answer
Are we human or are we dancers?

I genuinely lose hope in humanity everytime i hear this "song" :mad:

AnamGlas

Anything from Pitbull, Lil Wayne, N Dubz etc.

cringe

Forest Master

Anything by The Killers.

Teutorix

AnamGlas wrote: »

Anything from Pitbull, Lil Wayne, N Dubz etc.

cringe

Lil Wayne is a lyrical genius. NOT! :pac:

here is an example of good creative lyrics to lighten the mood in the thread

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EtkDpYlySRM

Johro

'Sir' Paul, aided and abetted by Stevie Wonder:

'Ebonyyy... and i-vo-ryyyyy...
live together in perfect, har-mo-nyyyy
side by side on my pia-no, key-board, oh lord
why don't weeeeeeeee....'

I mean, okay, we get the message, that's sound and all that, but ffs...

CapriSunFun

Hey hey, you you, I don't like your girlfriend,
No way, no way, I think you need a new one,
Hey hey, you you, I could be your girlfriend.

Avril Lavigne - Girlfriend

orourkeda

I've been kissed by a rose on the grave

pipelaser

The_Kew_Tour wrote: »

"I'm serious as cancer when I say rhythm is a dancer". by snap

wtf?

Thats a Fantastic Line! (Its just a little insulting to one in three)

Irish Guitarist

Wannabe by the Spice Girls is terrible but someone already mentioned it. The Real Slim Shady is another one I can't stand.

"My bum is on your lips, my bum is on your lips"
And if I'm lucky, you might just give it a little kiss
And that's the message that we deliver to little kids
And expect them not to know what a woman's clitoris is
Of course they gonna know what intercourse is
By the time they hit fourth grade

When was the message of "my bum is on your lips" delivered to little kids? Was it on Barney or something?

Bob the Seducer

Bob the Seducer wrote: »

"If she ever tries to f**kin' leave
again, I'ma tie her to the bed
And set this house on fire."

A less than charming sentiment from Eminem's Love the way you lie...
Surprised it was passed for daytime airplay (minus swearing) to be honest.

Or a lyric that makes perfect sense in context.

mrsbyrne

Latchy wrote: »

This by a Dean Friedman and some female back in the 80s ...



Him - '' I may not be all that bright but I know how to hold you tight and you can thank your lucky stars that we're not as smart as we like to think we are ''

Her -'' and you can thank your lucky stars that we're not as smart as we like to think we are ''

Him again - ''and you can thank your lucky stars that we're not as smart as we like to think we are ''

Both ...together :eek: ''and you can thank your lucky stars that we're not as smart as we like to think we are ''

The voice on the pair of them ...has to be in the top 10 of worst record/lyrics of all time :rolleyes:

more bloody blasphemy. God forgive you. Next thing youll be tellin us you dont like "i am in love with a McDonalds Girl"

cython

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=68ugkg9RePc

Eiffel 65 wrote:

Yo listen up here's a story
About a little guy that lives in a blue world
And all day and all night and everything he sees
Is just blue like him inside and outside
Blue is his house with a blue little window
And a blue corvette
And everything is blue for him and hisself
And everybody around
Cos he ain't got nobody to listen to

I'm blue da ba dee da ba die...

I have a blue house with a blue window.
Blue is the colour of all that I wear.
Blue are the streets and all the trees are too.
I have a girlfriend and she is so blue.
Blue are the people here that walk around,
Blue like my corvette, it's standing outside.
Blue are the words I say and what I think.
Blue are the feelings that live inside me.

I'm blue da ba dee da ba die...

I have a blue house with a blue window.
Blue is the colour of all that I wear.
Blue are the streets and all the trees are too.
I have a girlfriend and she is so blue.
Blue are the people here that walk around,
Blue like my corvette, it's standing outside.
Blue are the words I say and what I think.
Blue are the feelings that live inside me.

I'm blue da ba dee da ba die...

Inside and outside blue his house
With the blue little window and a blue corvette
And everything is blue for him and hisself
And everybody around cause he aint got
Nobody to listen to

I'm blue da ba dee da ba die...

I'm blue (da ba dee da ba die)

MistyCheese

Irish Guitarist wrote: »

When was the message of "my bum is on your lips" delivered to little kids? Was it on Barney or something?

He was referring to Tom Green who released a song called Lonely Swedish in 1999. The content of the song is pretty much just the singers bottom being on various things, including (but not limited to) cheese, a dog, a telephone and gum. You can view the lyrics to Lonely Swedish here, if you want to, that is.

Back to awful lyrics:

What's she gonna look like with a chimney on her?
Feel It - The Tamperer (featuring Maya on screech-als)

All summer that year kids were asking each other "You know what that means? You know what she means when she says that?" I would usually answer "Yes. We had this exact conversation the last time that song came on the radio."

I'm also not a fan of the nonsensical:

Gitchi gitchi ya ya da da
Gitchi gitchi ya ya here
Mocha chocolata, ya ya
Creole Lady Marmalade
Lady Marmalade - Patti LaBelle, All Saints, Christina Aguilera & Co.

Sounds like baby talk.

Da Shins Kelly

Hockney wrote: »

I give you "My Humps", by the Black Eyed Peas:

I mix your milk wit my cocoa puff,
Milky, milky cocoa,
Mix your milk with my cocoa puff, milky, milky riiiiiiight.


What you gon' do wit all that breast?
All that breast inside that shirt?
I'ma make, make, make, make you work
Make you work, work, make you work.

I think these two verses are my particular favourites in that song.

John Doe1

I dont really like Arctic Monkeys nonsensical lyrical direction of late

"Run wiith scissors through a ship and fireflies
Go into business with a grizzly bear
But just dont sit down cause ive moved your chair"

What the ****ing ****??

--Kaiser--

I retract my earlier statement about 'Desree - Life' having the worst lyrics ever, I just remembered the tremendous drivel spouted by Katie Melua

this...

There are nine million bicycles in Beijing
That's a fact
It's a thing we can't deny
Like the fact that I will love you till I die

that....

This is the closest thing to crazy I have ever been
Feeling twenty-two, acting seventeen,
This is the nearest thing to crazy I have ever known,
I was never crazy on my own...
And now I know that there's a link between the two,
Being close to craziness and being close to you.

..and the piece de resistance...

If you're a cowboy I would trail you,
If you're a piece of wood I'd nail you to the floor.
If you're a sailboat I would sail you to the shore.
If you're a river I would swim you,

sbsquarepants

--Kaiser-- wrote: »

I actually like that song...

No kaiser, you are mistaken,the song (hey soul sister) is utter shíte. I will give you that it has a catchy tune, but that's as far as i'll go.

Teutorix wrote: »

"milkshake is a metaphor for my womanly aura"

Actual quote from her.

I like her womanly aura, and also this song.

--Kaiser-- wrote: »

I retract my earlier statement about 'Desree - Life' having the worst lyrics ever, I just remembered the tremendous drivel spouted by Katie Melua

You have redeemed yourself somewhat:D

orourkeda

LeeHoffmann

This is the closest thing to crazy I have ever been
Feeling twenty-two, acting seventeen,
This is the nearest thing to crazy I have ever known,
I was never crazy on my own...
And now I know that there's a link between the two,
Being close to craziness and being close to you.

I think that's sweet (apart from ''feeling twenty-two" )

--Kaiser--

sbsquarepants wrote: »

I like her womanly aura, and also this song.

No , you are mistaken, you do not like this song

Da Shins Kelly

I don't see what's so terrible about that Closest Thing To Crazy song. The lyrics are not that bad, I don't think. Certainly not great, but not terrible either. There's far, far worse out there.

vangoz

Can you name the truck with four wheel drive,
Smells like a steak and seats thirty 5.

Canyonero!

Well it goes real slow with the hammer down,
Its the countrified truck and endorsed by a clown

Canyonero! YAH! Canyonero!

One yard long, two length wide
65 tons of American pride

Canyonero!

Top of the line in Utility Sports,
unexplained fires are a matter for the courts!

Canyonero! Canyonero! YAH!

She blinds everybody with a super high beam,
She's a squirrelsquasher deersmacking Driving Machine!

Canyonero! Yah Canyoneroooo!
YAH YAH CANYONERO WOAH CANYONERO!!!!!!!

Procasinator

Most of Katie Melua's songs have stupid lyrics, but this one shines brighter than most:

"If You Were a Sailboat"

If you're a cowboy I would trail you,
If you're a piece of wood I'd nail you to the floor.
If you're a sailboat I would sail you to the shore.
If you're a river I would swim you,
If you're a house I would live in you all my days.
If you're a preacher I'd begin to change my ways.

Sometimes I believe in fate,
But the chances we create,
Always seem to ring more true.
You took a chance on loving me,
I took a chance on loving you.

If I was in jail I know you'd spring me
If I was a telephone you'd ring me all day long
If was in pain I know you'd sing me soothing songs.

Sometimes I believe in fate,
But the chances we create,
Always seem to ring more true.
You took a chance on loving me,
I took a chance on loving you.

If I was hungry you would feed me
If I was in darkness you would lead me to the light
If I was a book I know you'd read me every night

If you're a cowboy I would trail you,
If you're a piece of wood I'd nail you to the floor.
If you're a sailboat I would sail you to the shore.
If you're a sailboat I would sail you to the shore

bluefinger

Puff Daddy -can't nobody hold me down

I'm young black and famous, with money hanging out my anus,

Shakira -hips don't lie

lucky that my breast are small and humble, so you don't confuse them with mountains.

(used to sing this one to my gf, cracked us up)

tightropetom

THERE IS A MOUNTAIN
Donovan

The lock upon my garden gate's a snail, that's what it is.
The lock upon my garden gate's a snail, that's what it is.
First there is a mountain, then there is no mountain, then there is.
First there is a mountain, then there is no mountain, then there is.
The caterpillar sheds his skin to find a butterfly within.
Caterpillar sheds his skin to find a butterfly within.
First there is a mountain, then there is no mountain, then there is.
First there is a mountain, then there is no mountain.
Oh Wanita, oh Wanita, oh Wanita, I call your name.
Oh, the snow will be a blinding sight to see as it lies on yonder hillside.
The lock upon my garden gate's a snail, that's what it is.
The lock upon my garden gate's a snail, that's what it is.
Caterpillar sheds his skin to find a butterfly within.
Caterpillar sheds his skin to find a butterfly within.
Ah, my-my.
First there is a mountain, then there is no mountain, then there is.
First there is a mountain, then there is no mountain, then there is.
First there is a mountain, then there is no mountain, then there is.
First there is a mountain, then there is no mountain, then there is.

Wonder what drugs he was on? :-)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=37r07eg867Y

the purple tin

CapriSunFun wrote: »

Behold the lyrics of Ke$ha;

"Your love, your love, your love, is my drug. I like your beard"

"Dont be a little b!tch with your chit chat, just show me where your d!ck's at"

Christ.

Not to mention the line "I brush my teeth with a bottle of jack" WHY??
and surely it wouldn't take a whole bottle just to brush your teeth!

emarfrog

"I met a guy at the club

I let him know I'm in love

I met a girl at the bar
I let her know who you are

I told her you are a love of my life and
One day you gonna be my wife and

We are gonna have some baby together
I told him you are a man of my dreams
You saved me from drowning in the streams
I know we're really gonna last forever and ever

It was those, 3 words that saved my life
It wasn't complicated
Wasn't pre-meditated
It wasn't under-rated
Boy I'm so glad you stayed and
It was those 3 words saved my life
It wasn't complicated
Wasn't pre-meditated
To you I'm dedicated

Let's go ahead and say it oh yeah"


Cheryl Cole, Ladies and Gentlemen, :eek:

Hercule Poirot

MistyCheese wrote: »

Back to awful lyrics:

What's she gonna look like with a chimney on her?
Feel It - The Tamperer (featuring Maya on screech-als)

I think this is a reference to giving her love rival a black eye - I'll get my coat...:o

The House Of Wolves

One maca two maca three macarena, four maca five maca six macarena. Seven maca eight maca nine macarena - EEEEEEYYYY MACARENA.

jive

aoife_bennett wrote: »

Your grammar is appalling.

My grammar is appalling because when posting a message on After Hours I put "you're opinion" instead of "your opinion" by mistake/without paying attention? You realise I used it correctly when stating the lyric saying "you're the chocolate..." and not "your the chocolate..."?

People who go around correcting posts on internet forum boards (especially one as lighthearted as After Hours) are sad little bastards. I think you'll find that your grammar is appalling, Aoife_Bennett. I got an A1 in honours English for the leaving cert and I am a published poet, you mad?

I'm guessing you're doing a course which has a large emphasis on English and thus have an inflated sense of self-importance with regards to the English language and feel that it is your duty to correct others? Sad.

saywhatyousee

"hot dog jumping frog albuquerque" Prefab sprout king of rock n roll good song though

thee glitz

N-Dubz

You're my love
I was missing yesterday
I'm pissed I never took your number
Now you're nowhere to be found
I'm going mad, I need you
I've been searchin' all over Facebook,
and I can't seem to find you
I really have to find you, baby I need you

CapriSunFun

The House Of Wolves wrote: »

One maca two maca three macarena, four maca five maca six macarena. Seven maca eight maca nine macarena - EEEEEEYYYY MACARENA.

Erm....

ToddyDoody

http://www.lyricsmania.com/dancelyrics/dj_casper_cha_cha_slide_lyrics_742.html

PK2008

"Your love...

...was sent from above"


Every boy band in the history of crap music

Dudess

Loads of sh1te lyrics to awful, mass-produced stuff, but I always think, when it comes to this topic, of artists I like:

Thumbs up for their sheer "Ah just stick whatever rhymes in" approach.

Madness - "I like driving in my car... even with a flat ty-ar" (Driving In My Car)
The Stranglers - "I can think of a lot worse places to be - like down in the streets, or down in the sewer... or even on the end of a skewer" (Peaches)
T-Rex - "She's my woman of gold and she's not very old... She ain't no witch and I love the way she twitch... She's faster than most and she lives on the coast..." (Hot Love)
Prince - "Sign o' the times, mess with your mind, hurry before it's too late... Let's fall in love get married have a baby - we'll call him Nate... if it's a boy" (Sign O' The Times)

John Doe1

From the beatles:

"Why dont we do it in the road, why dont we...." in the road like paved under it??

"We all live in a yellow submarine" Just no

DEFTLEFTHAND

There's blood on the tracks, and they must be mine
fool on the hill, and I feel fine
don't look back, cause you know what you might see.

Oasis....' Dyou know what I mean?'

John Doe1

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

There's blood on the tracks, and they must be mine
fool on the hill, and I feel fine
don't look back, cause you know what you might see.

Oasis....' Dyou know what I mean?'

Jesus christ:eek:

Acacia

CorsetIsTight wrote: »

"I got soul, but I'm not a soldier."

Seriously...?

"I got ham, but I'm not a hamster." Bill Bailey

CapriSunFun

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

There's blood on the tracks, and they must be mine
fool on the hill, and I feel fine
don't look back, cause you know what you might see.

Oasis....' Dyou know what I mean?'

There's so many Oasis song that have the words "Shine", "Fine", and "Slide" in them.

ToddyDoody

http://www.lyricsdepot.com/desree/life.html

Mindkiller

Anything by these guys.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a1u_SA4PGzU

Warning. The lyrics are extremely crude so don't open it at work

Acacia

Mindkiller wrote: »

Anything by these guys.

Warning. The lyrics are extremely crude so don't open it at work

I personally feel Torso****'s "Raped by Elephants" to be much more sophisticated and classy!:p:D

I had a look at some of the related vids to that song on Youtube... some great titles... "Panda Penis", "Herpes Injection", and my personal fave "P1ss Shower Cumslut".

I mean, I like metal myself , but holy fcuk!:pac: