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So my housemate tried to kill me last night...

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    #32
    General General
    Registered Users Posts: 1,900 ✭✭✭General General


    In former USSR, ve had vayz ov makingz zhure thiz guy getz enormoz heartz attak (no vun suzpectz noving), unlezz he vaz apparatchik, then he getz promotzion.


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    #33
    Dangerous Man
    Registered Users Posts: 2,674 ✭✭✭Dangerous Man


    You should have killed him.






































    Probably.


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    #34
    Duggy747
    Registered Users Posts: 13,295 ✭✭✭✭Duggy747


    AG2R wrote: »
    total bull**** but funny none the less

    Believe me, it ain't bullshìt.

    Wouldn't pass much heed in his other antics since we knew he was leaving anyways but what he did last night completely raised the bar.


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    #35
    Kevin Duffy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,439 ✭✭✭Kevin Duffy


    He brings you new music to entertain you, you moan. He tries to bring you some cake and has a knife ready to cut it, you moan. Your girlfriend is over which he is aware makes you more cautious, he sleeps on and patrols the landing for your peace of mind, you moan.

    You're lucky to have such a considerate housemate. You'll miss him after Friday.


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    #36
    Dangerous Man
    Registered Users Posts: 2,674 ✭✭✭Dangerous Man


    Duggy747 wrote: »
    Believe me, it ain't bullshìt.

    Wouldn't pass much heed in his other antics since we knew he was leaving anyways but what he did last night completely raised the bar.

    I'm having a bit of difficulty believing that the cops 'couldn't do anything.' Threatening someone with a lethal weapon is squarely, and obviously against the law. Your word alone should be enough to get him arrested.


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    #37
    Guill
    Registered Users Posts: 3,331 ✭✭✭Guill


    Probably more like this:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2E-flDxci-M


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    #38
    sheesh
    Registered Users Posts: 4,081 ✭✭✭sheesh


    can you not stay with the gf? or just change the lock on the front door so yer man cannot get back in?


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    #39
    x in the city
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,134 ✭✭✭x in the city


    Duggy747 wrote: »
    .....by tying to force his way into my room with the kitchen knife. He passed out and when I went out to him I found the knife beside him. With-holding my temptation to cave his skull in I took a picture of him with the knife and rang the landlord.

    He stayed out on the landing, waking up every now and again patrolling it, waiting for someone to come out and just pass out again.

    He's already been told to leave 3 weeks ago but the landlord can't kick him out until Friday as per a month's notice he can give someone. Went to the Gardaì, showed them the picture but they told me they couldn't do anything either. They did give me a number to ring next time he tries something.

    He's a bad drunk who's being doing shìt to annoy us. It all started with him blaring the stereo in the kitchen at 6am in the morning when he was drinking and we told him to cut it out. Since then every night he's gone out (2 -3 times a week) some shìt happens when he comes back. Kept telling the landlord but his hands were tied.

    So basically, me and the housemates have to survive being murdered until Friday.

    Fùck that shìt, I'm outta here. I would've beaten the shìt out of him on other occasions but when someone brings a knife to the fight I don't hang around. I'm looking at the big-ass knife I took off him here in my room and sickened at what could've happened had I not locked my door.

    I was lucky, I rarely lock my door unless the gf is staying over which she was last night. Could've ended alot differently.

    Besides getting the fùck out of here, anyone here in AH can give me top tips to dealing with a drunk who wants to kill you and your housemates?

    the cox lady will sort him out in no time


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    #40
    El Guapo!
    Registered Users Posts: 12,437 ✭✭✭✭El Guapo!


    All jokes aside, the Garda are fúck all help in a serious situation.
    "Someone tried to kill me"
    "Oh sorry bout that but nothing we can do"
    Well fúck you then.

    I'm sure if you killed him in self defence they'd have no problem arresting you.


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    #41
    Duggy747
    Registered Users Posts: 13,295 ✭✭✭✭Duggy747


    Dangerous Man wrote: »
    I'm having a bit of difficulty believing that the cops 'couldn't do anything.' Threatening someone with a lethal weapon is squarely, and obviously against the law. Your word alone should be enough to get him arrested.

    Went to the cop, he told me there was fùck all he could do given that he didn't actually stab me or kill me :confused: He also said it was more of the landlords problem to solve.

    He was being sound and he gave me a number to another station. He said if I ring them they'll come immediately since the house is now on the radar.

    Oh, and I've updated my 1st post to include the picture I took for you non-believers.


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    #42
    Snakeblood
    Registered Users Posts: 4,466 ✭✭✭Snakeblood


    Duggy747 wrote: »
    Besides getting the fùck out of here, anyone here in AH can give me top tips to dealing with a drunk who wants to kill you and your housemates?

    Let him. Why don't you consider what other people want for a change.:mad:


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    #43
    DEFTLEFTHAND
    Registered Users Posts: 16,500 ✭✭✭✭DEFTLEFTHAND


    I really wouldn't run the risk of staying in the same building as this nutjob for the week. Any way you could spend the week with friends/family?


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    #44
    Noo
    Registered Users Posts: 1,986 ✭✭✭Noo


    AG2R wrote: »
    total bull**** but funny none the less

    I know a fella like this guy and if i heard this story about him i'd believe it, some people are just complete psychos when on a bender!

    My answer: I'd get the f*ck outta there until you know he is gone.

    AH answer: Blast with piss, pics or gtfo, etc etc...


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    #45
    FTGFOP
    Registered Users Posts: 2,389 ✭✭✭FTGFOP


    General General wrote: »
    In former USSR, ve had vayz ov makingz zhure thiz guy getz enormoz heartz attak (no vun suzpectz noving), unlezz he vaz apparatchik, then he getz promotzion.

    You're fooling no one, Dutch boy!


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    #46
    Saint_Mel
    Registered Users Posts: 2,598 ✭✭✭Saint_Mel


    Next time he passes out while trying to kill you, ring the Gardai and tell them he tried to kill you... but you now have a shot gun pressed against his head and unless they send someone around in the next 5 minutes you are going to blow his brains out
    (pause and giggle for obvious bj joke)


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    #47
    WindSock
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,239 ✭✭✭✭WindSock


    Go into the local garda station and try make a formal complaint. And ask to borrow a stab vest to make a point.


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    #48
    longhalloween
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,207 ✭✭✭longhalloween


    Tie him up, throw him in the bath and turn the tap on sliiightly. So it slowly fills up drip by drip...

    or lock your door?


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    #49
    El Guapo!
    Registered Users Posts: 12,437 ✭✭✭✭El Guapo!


    Your link doesn't work.


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    #50
    Solnskaya
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,463 ✭✭✭Solnskaya


    Offer him a lift to the pub and then ram his side of the car in under the overhang of an artic. This might mess up your car, but he will be much quieter once he has had his head removed. You can just say he distracted you as you were driving/lunged for the wheel. Only joking, ahem, obviously;)


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    #51
    Cee-Jay-Cee
    Registered Users Posts: 12,235 ✭✭✭✭Cee-Jay-Cee


    Crap in a paper bag, light it and leave it outside his bedroom door, knock and run away...you know the rest.


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    #52
    Poor Uncle Tom
    Registered Users Posts: 14,546 ✭✭✭✭Poor Uncle Tom


    Now that you have your alibi sorted you can do him.....

    "sorry guarda but you said there was nothing you could do and he came at me, protectin myself was all I was doing"


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    #53
    Chuck Stone
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,030 ✭✭✭✭Chuck Stone


    I know who that is and I'm telling him about this thread.


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    #54
    wobbles
    Registered Users Posts: 1,090 ✭✭✭wobbles


    Fishing wire at the top of the stairs next time hes pissed. He wont see it, trip over it and you will get away scot free because hes so drunk.


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    #55
    Chuck Stone
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,030 ✭✭✭✭Chuck Stone


    CJC999 wrote: »
    Crap in a paper bag, light it and leave it outside his bedroom door, knock and run away...you know the rest.

    Yes because running away will hide the identity of OP. :pac:


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    #56
    Dyr
    Registered Users Posts: 23,246 ✭✭✭✭Dyr


    I know i'd take someone trying to stab me fierce personal


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    #57
    PandyAndy
    Registered Users Posts: 583 ✭✭✭PandyAndy


    Replace all the knives with fake ones that have retractable blades, so next time he tries to stab you the joke will be on him. He'll probably leave with the embarrassment after falling for such a terrible prank.

    30 years later you'll look both look back and laugh.


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    #58
    Solnskaya
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,463 ✭✭✭Solnskaya


    Chuck Stone wrote: »
    I know who that is and I'm telling him about this thread.
    fancy a lift to the pub?:D


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    #59
    ahyeahok
    Closed Accounts Posts: 743 ✭✭✭ahyeahok


    was he chasing you with a teacup too?


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    #60
    Duggy747
    Registered Users Posts: 13,295 ✭✭✭✭Duggy747


    There have been plenty of times when each of us here were going to punch him but we all agreed not to do that if we needed to get rid of him efficently.

    He hangs around with pure dodgy scummers, too, and he's been using the house like a hotel here for his buddies last week.

    Last night he left this crazy Rasputin looking guy passed out on the kitchen floor while he went out on the piss.

    Me and the other housemate had to throw him out (which he wouldn't leave easily either)

    We think that's what the whole knife thing was about last night then.................plus he shouted outside the house that he was going to burn the place down with all of us in it.

    I'm gonna kip at the gf's gaff anyways. I'm allergic to that house for some reason but I'll put up with snotty sniffles rather than a coffin or a lovely collastomy bag.


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    #61
    Duggy747
    Registered Users Posts: 13,295 ✭✭✭✭Duggy747


    ahyeahok wrote: »
    was he chasing you with a teacup too?

    He made himself a cup of tea presumably to keep himself awake, he didn't last very long though :pac:


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