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Neighbour slapped my child.

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    #152
    Penny Dreadful
    Registered Users Posts: 3,041 ✭✭✭Penny Dreadful


    daltonmd wrote: »
    He did not interact with the child, he walked up and walloped him. It doesn't matter where the car was or where the kid was. None of that matters. A grown man struck a child. You cannot do that.

    ......according to the mystery witness. Funny how the slap has grown into a wallop now...........


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    #153
    psychward
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,187 ✭✭✭psychward


    It seems like we are discussing a lot of hypotheticals here. Is it right not to take an OP at face value when they look for advice ?

    small child touching a car = not a crime

    Adult hitting a child = crime.

    Seems simple enough to me.


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    #154
    Penny Dreadful
    Registered Users Posts: 3,041 ✭✭✭Penny Dreadful


    daltonmd wrote: »
    if there is a question or an accusation then it is the Gardai who decide whether an assault took place. When a child and a witness make that accusation than that is not flimsy evidence. it is an accusation that has to be investigated.

    The child has spoken to you now? I thought they were utterly silent on this matter?


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    #155
    Zulu
    Registered Users Posts: 10,965 ✭✭✭✭Zulu


    daltonmd wrote: »
    And in my opinion, if this man got out of his car and struck the child then he as good as walked up to him and walloped him.
    ..so we're moving from hyperbole to fantasy.

    Super.

    Yea sure if someone got out of their car an whallop... wait, sure why bother getting out of the car, say if someone whalloped my kid with their car for no good reason, I'd call the cops. BIGTIME.


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    #156
    sbsquarepants
    Registered Users Posts: 11,812 ✭✭✭✭sbsquarepants


    I sincerely hope that those of you arguing here for the grown mans "right" to hit a neighbours child are not actually parents yourselves, cos if you are, you are piss poor examples and you should be ashamed of yourselves.
    Nothing gives your neighbour the right to hit your child, nothing at all, certainly not the love of a damn car - what the hell is wrong with you people.
    What sort of parent reckons their neighbours car is more important than their own child being assaulted and terrified?
    A bad one, plain and simple.


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    #157
    daltonmd
    Registered Users Posts: 1,246 ✭✭✭daltonmd


    Abi wrote: »
    'Touching' the car?


    If he merely 'touched' the car, I'm sure the driver wouldn't have heard it. Now what cause would the child have to touch somebodies property for anyway?

    There is no excuse for it. I've said before I don't condone the fact that he slapped the child. But the situation would never have arose if the child had been off playing and minding his own business.

    I'm actually shocked that you don't see the root of the problem here.

    And I am shocked that you, or any other grown adult would look to the behaviour of an 8 year old child and find any reasons for a grown man to put his hand on a child.

    It is inexcusable to make allowances for a fully grown man to strike a child, yet look to that child to have the sense not create the issue in the first place.

    Again, there is more respect shown to the mans car, a piece of metal, then is what is being shown to the child.

    I am rarely shocked, but am in this case.


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    #158
    Zulu
    Registered Users Posts: 10,965 ✭✭✭✭Zulu


    sbsquarepants wrote: »
    I sincerely hope that those of you arguing here for the grown mans "right" to hit a neighbours child.
    No one is making that point.

    "Paedophiles OUT!!!"


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    #159
    Penny Dreadful
    Registered Users Posts: 3,041 ✭✭✭Penny Dreadful


    daltonmd wrote: »
    "if he just walked up and indiscriminately walloped the child"

    It was in response to this statement. And in my opinion, if this man got out of his car and struck the child then he as good as walked up to him and walloped him.

    "If" "as good as"...........punishment without certainty. A good way to go all right.


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    #160
    daltonmd
    Registered Users Posts: 1,246 ✭✭✭daltonmd


    Zulu wrote: »
    ..so we're moving from hyperbole to fantasy.

    Super.

    Yea sure if someone got out of their car an whallop... wait, sure why bother getting out of the car, say if someone whalloped my kid with their car for no good reason, I'd call the cops. BIGTIME.


    Well shure it's alright to say that the child caused willful damage to the car isn't it? Or that it will lead him to throw stones and his parents are crap because they allowed him to play out on his road? Not only that, but if he touches the car today and is not sorted out then he'll be throwing rocks at it tommorow...


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    #161
    Abi
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,058 ✭✭✭✭Abi


    Zamboni wrote: »
    I missed the memo where a 'serious chat' solves everything.

    You think giving your own child and this man 'a hiding' is the correct way to deal with this?



    Really?


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    #162
    Ickle Magoo
    Closed Accounts Posts: 17,485 ✭✭✭✭Ickle Magoo


    Zamboni wrote: »
    That sounds remarkably like, well he wouldn't have raped her if she wasn't dressed like that.
    You cannot justify a grown man hitting an unknown 8 year old child no matter what you say.

    Don't selectively quote my post to throw in a hyperbolic straw man - and come back to me when it's established that the guy actually hit the kid... :rolleyes:


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    #163
    daltonmd
    Registered Users Posts: 1,246 ✭✭✭daltonmd


    Penny Dreadful wrote: »
    "If" "as good as"...........punishment without certainty. A good way to go all right.

    And a man striking a child because he touched his car is what exactly???


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    #164
    meitina
    Registered Users Posts: 96 ✭✭meitina


    People!!!!!!!!!!!!
    I'm already upset as it is,the is no need to call me a liar!!!
    The witness is another adult!
    The child has confirmed the same events as my neighbour witness!
    So I have all the rights to believe two the same stories against the assaulter !
    My apologies for the lack of detail -english is not my first language !!!!!!!!!!


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    #165
    cynder
    Registered Users Posts: 4,128 ✭✭✭cynder


    MagicMarker wrote: »
    And the answer to my question .?

    Has been answered.

    cant paint everything with the same brush.

    Take for instance if you ( a fully grown adult) walked in on those kids killing Jamie Bulgar would you intervene and have physical contact with the kids or would you call the guards and let them continue ?

    I would bet you would have physical contact with those 2 boys to save the child life!

    so answer me this would you stand and watch while two 10 year olds were slaughtering a baby or would you have physical contact?


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    #166
    daltonmd
    Registered Users Posts: 1,246 ✭✭✭daltonmd


    Penny Dreadful wrote: »
    The child has spoken to you now? I thought they were utterly silent on this matter?


    We've moved on. The issue is if he hit the child was it right. And some of you here are splitting hairs and believe that it is right.


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    #167
    Zulu
    Registered Users Posts: 10,965 ✭✭✭✭Zulu


    daltonmd wrote: »
    Well shure it's alright to say that the child caused willful damage to the car isn't it?
    No. You are making a hell of a lot of assertions/assumptions daltonmd.


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    #168
    Ickle Magoo
    Closed Accounts Posts: 17,485 ✭✭✭✭Ickle Magoo


    daltonmd wrote: »
    Again, we are working on the assumption that he did. If he did then he had no right.

    I'm hoping you aren't part of the judiciary with that logic...

    He had absolutely no right to hit a child - and the child had absolutely no right to touch his car. Two wrongs...


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    #169
    daltonmd
    Registered Users Posts: 1,246 ✭✭✭daltonmd


    Zulu wrote: »
    No one is making that point.


    "Paedophiles OUT!!!"



    Yes they are.


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    #170
    cynder
    Registered Users Posts: 4,128 ✭✭✭cynder


    meitina wrote: »
    People!!!!!!!!!!!!
    I'm already upset as it is,the is no need to call me a liar!!!
    The witness is another adult!
    The child has confirmed the same events as my neighbour witness!
    So I have all the rights to believe two the same stories against the assaulter !
    My apologies for the lack of detail -english is not my first language !!!!!!!!!!

    NO ones calling you a liar, you only gave half a story, no one can adivise you what to do with only half a story.


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    #171
    Zulu
    Registered Users Posts: 10,965 ✭✭✭✭Zulu


    meitina wrote: »
    The witness is another adult!
    And they saw the man strike the child across the face? I ask because I think you implied that they weren't sure earlier.
    To find out definatly: I would suggest asking them if they'd be happy to stand up in court as a witness to the assault.
    daltonmd wrote:
    Yes they are.
    Who made that point? Who stated the adult had the "right" to hit the child?


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    #172
    meitina
    Registered Users Posts: 96 ✭✭meitina


    What part of the story you are missing?


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    #173
    daltonmd
    Registered Users Posts: 1,246 ✭✭✭daltonmd


    meitina wrote: »
    People!!!!!!!!!!!!
    I'm already upset as it is,the is no need to call me a liar!!!
    The witness is another adult!
    The child has confirmed the same events as my neighbour witness!
    So I have all the rights to believe two the same stories against the assaulter !
    My apologies for the lack of detail -english is not my first language !!!!!!!!!!


    Don't worry about it Metine. We are discussing whether or not it is right for a grown man to put his hands on a child and it is not. Not only that but it is illegal.

    I know of a similar event where a friend of mines son hit another mans daughter. The girls father went nuts and drove up to the green like a maniac, he corned the teen and, with his nose to the teens nose went on to scream and shout at the teen, causing huge upset. His parents reported it to the gardai and the man was cautioned.

    You cannot behave like that to minors. End of. Report it and put this man straight once and for all. Tel your son that this mans behaviour was wrong. Yes, your son shouldn't have messed with the car, of course he shouldn't have. But his crime came nowhere near this mans crime.


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    #174
    therewillbe
    Registered Users Posts: 741 ✭✭✭therewillbe


    "I felt like slapping a neighbours Child" But Didnt. This muppet at speed on a bike clipped my off side and when for a hike.Damaged the front quarter,who cares,He was OK.I went to his home to tell a parent,Knock knock,No one there,Both in work.FFS 8year old .I did go around later and explained and they couldnt give a toss about Jr.Thats when I hit him with the damage.:mad:I wasnt going too but hey ,His attitude.Felt like slapping the Father. All in a split moment.S..t,You cant hit Kid`s or you will end up in trouble no matter what the little rascals do.


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    #175
    meitina
    Registered Users Posts: 96 ✭✭meitina


    meitina wrote: »
    I'm shocked at what happened.What I need is an advice to do the right thing.
    Boy age 8 got attacked and slapped in face for touching my neighbours car as it drove past.
    I did not see that ,my son would not tell me anything ,as I understood ,he was frightened .
    I heard it from a witness .When confronted ,the man was very sorry ,told me he did overreacted.:mad:
    As far as the conversation went I said that it is very upsetting for me ,but im willing to let it go if he promises to talk to me before deciding on slapping.
    Now I found that my son actually wetted himself on the spot.:mad:

    Where did I say the witness could not see.


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    #176
    daltonmd
    Registered Users Posts: 1,246 ✭✭✭daltonmd


    Ickle Magoo wrote: »
    I'm hoping you aren't part of the judiciary with that logic...

    He had absolutely no right to hit a child - and the child had absolutely no right to touch his car. Two wrongs...


    Ah, you are quite wrong. The child had no right to touch his car= no crime.

    Man strikes/hits/wallops child. = Assault=crime.


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    #177
    ash23
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,791 ✭✭✭ash23


    Right OP, well now you have a sound basis for the accusation, my advice would be to go to the gardai and let them deal with it from here on in.


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    #178
    daltonmd
    Registered Users Posts: 1,246 ✭✭✭daltonmd


    therewillbe wrote: »
    "I felt like slapping a neighbours Child" But Didnt. This muppet at speed on a bike clipped my off side and when for a hike.Damaged the front quarter,who cares,He was OK.I went to his home to tell a parent,Knock knock,No one there,Both in work.FFS 8year old .I did go around later and explained and they couldnt give a toss about Jr.Thats when I hit him with the damage.:mad:I wasnt going too but hey ,His attitude.Felt like slapping the Father. All in a split moment.S..t,You cant hit Kid`s or you will end up in trouble no matter what the little rascals do.

    Absolutely correct, because the child caused damage to your property. In this case the child didn't...........


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    #179
    daltonmd
    Registered Users Posts: 1,246 ✭✭✭daltonmd


    meitina wrote: »
    Where did I say the witness could not see.

    You didn't, but as I said the issue here moved on because there are people who are of the mindset that in some way your child deserved to be struck. The real issue is regardless of what people feel, it is legally and morally wrong for a grown man to strike a child.


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    #180
    Neyite
    Administrators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,947 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Neyite


    I dont believe that there is ever a situation that warrants hitting a child. Ever.

    OP, you would be better off to call the Gardai. At least they would get to the bottom of the story, If they feel your child need to be sternly spoken to or the neighbour be given a warning or caution or whatever, at least they will establish what really happened. You dont seem too pushed on establishing the facts here so someone should.

    You heard it secondhand from someone. Your boy has not said he was slapped, the neighbour has not said he slapped. The only person who mentioned the incident is a witness who said it "looked like it might have been a slap". hmmm... very vague.

    You have not questioned your child at all as to why he was touching moving vehicles (or in fact how he managed to get that close to a moving vehicle to touch it in the first place) Which would be the second question I would be asking, wet arse or not. The first question I would ask my child is exactly what physical contact transpired. Y'know, just so I could confront the adult knowing my sons side of the story.

    If a driver heard something inside a vehicle above the engine noise and radio, then whatever your son did to that car was audible, and therefore was more of a thump. A pat from a grown up would not take much effort but from a child it requires more force. It was audible enough to warrant the driver to stop and investigate. Thats possibly the only established fact here.

    I was once stopped in traffic and got a soft thump on the back of the car by a Garda. Scared the crap outta me and my first thought was that perhaps I rolled over someone. Turns out he was letting me know I lost a number plate, but my heart thumped for ages after it. If a kid was involved I probably would have been shaking.

    An 8 year old who thinks its ok to thump/pat/hit moving vehicles will likely be the one who thinks its hilarious in a couple of years time to stick a stone in a snowball and throw it at a car in dangerous conditions, and maybe a few years later to think its hysterical altogether to throw things like blocks off flyovers.

    Find out what really happened. Then punish your child accordingly if he misbehaved. If actual physical contact happened with the neighbour, then choose to do what you will about that, but the neighbours offence does not wipe out your childs offence. There are 2 offences that may have happened here but you are totally ignoring one, and is a serious safety issue.


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    #181
    meitina
    Registered Users Posts: 96 ✭✭meitina


    The more I think ,my problem is that this happened out of such small thing!
    In fairness ,myself would wet the pants if man his size came up to me violently ,no need to even hit!
    So now he hit the boy for touching the car ,imagine what would he do if a child really damaged something-then he would be aloud to use a baseball bat?????


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