Stupid American Laws

EKClarke

ALABAMA Stupid Laws

In Alabama, it is illegal to wear a fake mustache that causes laughter in church.

It is legal to drive the wrong way down a one-way street if you have a lantern attached to the front of your automobile.

It is illegal to impersonate a person of the clergy.

In Mobile, AL, it is illegal for pigeons to eat pebbles from composite roofs.

It is illegal to play Dominoes on Sunday.

It is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle.

You may not have an ice cream cone in your back pocket at any time.

Boogers may not be flicked into the wind.

Incestuous marriages are legal.

It is illegal to sell peanuts in Lee County after sundown on Wednesday.

In Anniston, you may not wear blue jeans down Noble Street.

It is illegal to wear a mask in public.


ALASKA Silly Laws

It is illegal to push a live moose out of a moving airplane.

In Anchorage, it is illegal for a person to tie their pet dog to the roof of a car.

While it is legal to shoot bears, waking a sleeping bear for the purpose of taking a photograph is prohibited.


ARIZONA Weird State Laws

No more than six girls may live in any house.

It is illegal to manufacture imitation cocaine.

It is unlawful to refuse a person a glass of water.

Any misdemeanor committed while wearing a red mask is considered a felony.

It is illegal to let a Donkey sleep in a bathtub.

Hunting camels is prohibited.

An ordinance prohibits the wearing of suspenders.

When being attacked by a criminal or burglar, you may only protect yourself with the same weapon that the criminal is using.

You may not have more than two dildos in a house.

In Globe, you cannot play cards in the street with a Native American.


ARKANSAS Funny Laws

It is illegal to mispronounce the name of the state of Arkansas.

It is legal for a husband to beat his wife, but not more than once a month.

It is illegal to keep Alligators in bathtubs.

Dogs may not bark after 6 PM in Little Rock.

In Little Rock it is unlawful to walk one’s cow down Main Street after 1:00 PM on Sunday.


CALIFORNIA Stupid Laws

It is illegal to give or receive oral sex.

In Cerritos, all dog waste must be removed from any yard within seven days.

In California, It is illegal to duck hunt while flying in an airplane.

In Los Angeles, customers in meat markets are prohibited from poking a turkey to see how tender it is.

It is a misdemeanor to shoot at any kind of game from a moving vehicle, unless the target is a whale.

Animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship.

No vehicle without a driver may exceed 60 miles per hour.

In Los Angeles, you can be fined for bathing two babies in the same tub at the same time.

Under California state law, it is illegal to peel an orange in a hotel room.

In Los Angeles a man is legally entitled to beat his wife with a leather belt or strap, but the belt can't be wider than 2 inches, unless he has his wife's consent to beat her with a wider strap.

In Baldwin Park, nobody is allowed to ride a bicycle in a swimming pool.

In San Francisco, it is illegal to spray people's clothing with saliva spewed out of your mouth.

You are not permitted to wear cowboy boots unless you already own at least two cows.

In Blythe you are not permitted to wear cowboy boots unless you already own at least 2 cows.

In Berkeley, California, it's against the law to whistle for your lost canary before 7 A.M.

Women may not drive in a house coat.

The owners of houses with Christmas lights on them past February second may be fined up to $250.

In California, community leaders passed an ordinance that makes it illegal for anyone to try and stop a child from playfully jumping over puddles of water.

Bowling on the sidewalk is illegal in Chico, CA.


COLORADO Silly Laws

In Denver, it is illegal to lend your vacuum cleaner to your next-door neighbor.

The dog catcher must notify dogs of impounding by posting, for 3 consecutive days, a notice on a tree in the city park and along a public road running through said park.

In Alamosa it is illegal to throw missiles at cars.

Persons may not urinate in public.

In Boulder, CO boulders may not be rolled on city property.

It is illegal to ride a horse while under the influence.

In Aspen catapults may not be fired at buildings.


CONNECTICUT Funny Laws

You can be stopped by the police for biking over 65 miles per hour.

In Connecticut, you are not allowed to walk across a street on your hands.

In Devon it is illegal to walk backwards after sunset.

It is illegal to dispose of used razor blades.

You cannot buy any alcohol after 8pm or on Sundays.

Silly strings are banned in Southington.

It is illegal to discharge a firearm from a public highway.

In Waterbury it is illegal for any beautician to hum, whistle, or sing while working on a customer.

You may not educate dogs in Hartford.

It is illegal for a man to kiss his wife on Sunday in Hartford.


DELAWARE Weird State Laws

Alcohol may not be served in nightclubs if dancing is occurring on the premises at the same time.

No person shall pretend to sleep on a bench on the boardwalk.

It is illegal to wear pants that are “firm fitting” around the waist.

One may not whisper in church.

No person shall change clothes in his or her vehicle.

Getting married on a dare is grounds for an annulment.

It is illegal to fly over any body of water, unless one is carrying sufficient supplies of food and drink.


FLORIDA Stupid Laws

In Florida, a special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.

Oral sex is illegal in Florida.

One may not commit any “unnatural acts” with another person.

It is illegal to sell your children in Florida.

You may not kiss your wife’s breasts.

When having sex, only the missionary position is legal in Florida.

If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.

Penalty for horse theft is death by hanging.

In Sarasota Florida it is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit

Unmarried couples may not commit “lewd acts” and live together in the same residence.

It is illegal to have sexual relations with a porcupine in Florida.

You may not fart in a public place after 6 P.


GEORGIA Stupid Laws

It is Illegal to keep Donkeys in bathtubs in Georgia.

No one may carry an ice cream cone in their back pocket if it is Sunday.

In Georgia it is illegal to drive your car on the sidewalk.

In Quitman, it is against the law for a chicken to cross any road within the city limits.

The use of profanity over the phone in Columbus, GA is illegal.

In Atlanta, it is illegal for one man to carry another man on his back.

It is illegal to use profanity in front of a dead body which lies in a funeral home or in a coroners office.

It is illegal to have a picnic in a graveyard.

Persons under the age of 16 may not play pinball after 11:00 PM.

It is illegal to use a slingshot made in Alabama inside the city limits of Atlanta.

Members of the state assembly cannot be ticketed for speeding while the state assembly is in session.

To spit on sidewalks after dark is illegal, during daylight hours it is acceptable.

Georgia has a law prohibiting people from saying "Oh boy" in public.

In Columbus, GA it's illegal to deface a house, fence or tree in any way (like carving one's name in it) inside the city limits.

All sex toys are banned.

Goldfish may not be given away to entice someone to enter a game of bingo.

At Nickajack Elementary School in Cobb County all peanut products are banned.

It is illegal for one to make a disturbing sound at a fair.


HAWAII Stupid Laws

Billboards are outlawed Hawaii.

In Hawaii it is against the law for you to insert coins in your ear.

Residents may be fined as a result of not owning a boat.


IDAHO Weird State Laws

Police officers in Coeur d'Alene, Idaho aren't allowed to walk up and knock on the window of a parked car who's occupants are having sex. Any suspicious officer who thinks that sex is taking place must drive up from behind, honk his horn three times and wait approximately 3 minutes before getting out of his car to investigate.

Residents may not fish from a giraffe's back.

You may not fish on a camel’s back.

A law passed in 1912 provided that “The carrying of concealed weapons is forbidden, unless some are exhibited to public view.

Bicycles are not allowed in the tennis courts.

A person may not be seen in public without a smile on their face.


ILLINOIS Stupid Laws

You may be arrested for vagrancy if you do not have at least one dollar bill on your person.

One may not pee in his neighbor’s mouth in Champaign.

It is legal to protest naked in front of city hall as long as you are under seventeen years of age and have legal permits.

In Homer, only police officers can legally carry slingshots.

In Joliet, women can be arrested for trying on more than 6 dresses in one store.

It is Illegal to eat in a place that is on fire.

You must contact the police before entering the city in an automobile.

It is illegal to give a dog whiskey.

Cars may not be driven through the town in Crete.

In Evanston bowling is forbidden.

It is unlawful to change clothes in an automobile with the curtains drawn, except in case of fire.


INDIANA Funny Laws

It is illegal for a man to be sexually aroused in public.

Baths may not be taken between the months of October and March.

Oral sex is illegal.

French Lick Springs, once passed a law requiring all black cats to wear bells on Friday the 13th.

You may not back into a parking spot. Police officers cannot see your license plate.

The value of Pi is 3.

Anyone 14 or older who profanely curses, damns or swears by the name of God, Jesus Christ or the Holy Ghost, shall be fined one to three dollars for each offense, with a maximum fine of ten dollars per day.

Liquor stores may not sell milk.

It is illegal for a liquor store to sell cold soft drinks.

A man over the age of 18 may be arrested for statutory rape if the passenger in his car is not wearing her socks and shoes, and is under the age of 17.

Smoking in the state legislature building is banned, except when the legislature is in session.

A person must get a referral from a licensed physician if he or she wishes to see a hypnotist unless the desired procedure is to quit smoking or lose weight.

It is illegal to sell cars on Sunday.

Smoking in the state legislature building is banned, except when the legislature is in session.


IOWA Stupid Laws

It is illegal for a man with a mustache to kiss a woman in public.

One-armed piano players must perform for free.

In Marshalltown horses are forbidden to eat fire hydrants.

Kisses may last for no more than five minutes.

In Ottumwa a man may not wink at any woman he does not know.

Liquor stores may not place advertisements for beer outside the store in Bettendorf.

In Fort Madison the fire department is required to practice fire fighting for fifteen minutes before attending a fire.

Tanning bed facilities must warn of the risk of getting a sunburn.

In Mount Vernon one must obtain written permission from the City Council before throwing bricks into a highway.


KANSAS Funny Laws

Pedestrians crossing the highways at night must wear tail lights.

In McLough, it's illegal to wash your false teeth in a public drinking fountain.

It is illegal to catch fish with bare hands.

The state game rule prohibits the use of mules to hunt ducks.

An ordinance in Lawrence, Kansas, forbids anyone to carry bees in his hat while on the city streets.

In Lawrence all cars entering the city limits must first sound their horn to warn the horses of their arrival.

It is Illegal to sing the alphabet on the streets at night in Topeka.

In Russell musical car horns are banned.

If two trains meet on the same track, neither shall proceed until the other has passed.


KENTUCKY Weird State Laws

It is illegal to transport an ice cream cone in your pocket.

In Kentucky, by law, anyone who has been drinking is "sober" until he or she "cannot hold onto the ground."

It is considered an offense for anyone to receive anal sex.

An ordinance prohibits the use of space guns.

One may not dye a duckling blue and offer it for sale unless more than six are for sale at once.

Children may smoke, but they may not purchase cigarettes.

It is illegal to fish with a bow and arrow in Kentucky.

Tattooing and body piercing is illegal.

One may not receive anal sex in Owensboro.

Alcoholic drink specials are illegal.

In Owensboro a woman may not buy a hat without her husband’s permission.

It is illegal to frighten a pigeon.

In Fort Thomas Dogs are prohibited to molest cars.


LOUISIANA Stupid Laws

Spectators at a boxing match may not mock one of the contestants.

“Fake” wrestling matches are prohibited.

Biting someone with your natural teeth is “simple assault,” while biting someone with your false teeth is “aggravated assault.

One could land in jail for up to a year for making a false promise.

A Person could land in jail for up to ten years for stealing an alligator.

It is illegal to rob a bank and then shoot at the bank teller with a water pistol.

One may not “dare” another to go onto railroad tracks owned by another.

No one may pour a drink out on the ground at any drive-in movie.

It is a $500 fine to instruct a pizza delivery man to deliver a pizza to your friend without them knowing.

It is illegal to gargle in public places.

Rituals that involve the ingestion of blood, urine, or fecal matter are not allowed.


MAINE Funny Laws

Shoelaces must be tied while walking down the street.

Shotguns are required to be taken to church in the event of a Native American attack.

In Portland, it's illegal to tickle a girl under the chin with a feather duster.

In South Berwick it is illegal to park in front of Dunkin Donuts.

You may not step out of a plane in flight.

In Augusta to stroll down the street playing a violin is against the law.


MARYLAND Stupid Laws

It’s illegal to throw bales of hay from a second-story window within the city limits.

You may not curse inside the city limits in Baltimore City.

It is a violation of city code to sell chicks or ducklings to a minor within 1 week of the Easter holiday.

No person who is a “tramp” or “vagrant” shall loiter in any park at any time.

It’s illegal to take a lion to the movies.

In Rockville persons may not swear while on the highway.

It is a park rule violation to be in a public park with a sleeveless shirt.


MASSACHUSETTS Stupid Laws

A woman can not be on top in sexual activities.

All men must carry a rifle to church on Sunday.

Taxi drivers are prohibited from making love in the front seat of their taxi during their shifts.

At a wake, mourners may eat no more than three sandwiches.

It is illegal to give beer to hospital patients.

Alcoholic drink specials are illegal.

No gorilla is allowed in the back seat of any car.

An old ordinance declares goatees illegal unless you first pay a special license fee for the privilege of wearing one in public.

It is illegal to go to bed without first having a full bath.

Bullets may not be used as currency.


MICHIGAN Stupid Laws

It is illegal to kill a dog using a decompression chamber.

It is legal for a robber to file a law suit, if he or she got hurt in your house.

No man may seduce and corrupt an unmarried girl, or else he risks five years in prison.

In Michigan, a man legally owns his wife's hair.

A woman isn’t allowed to cut her own hair without her husband’s permission.

Adultery is illegal, but can only be punished upon a complaint by the affected husband or wife.

It is illegal to let your pig run free in Detroit unless it has a ring in its nose.

There is a 3 cent bounty for each starling and 10 cent bounty for each crow killed in any village, township, or city in the state. (Repealed, 2006)


MINNESOTA Stupid Laws

It is illegal to stand around any building without a good reason to be there.

It is illegal to sleep naked.

In Alexandria, Minnesota a man is not allowed to make love to his wife with the smell of garlic, onions, or sardines on his breath.

Citizens may not enter Wisconsin with a chicken on their head.

A person may not cross state lines with a duck atop his head.

In Minneapolis red cars may not drive down Lake Street.

All men driving motorcycles must wear shirts.

Oral sex is prohibited.

In St. Cloud hamburgers may not be eaten on Sundays.


MISSISSIPPI Weird State Laws

It is illegal to teach others what polygamy is.

Private citizens may personally arrest any person that disturbs a church service.

If one is a parent to two illegitimate children, that person will go to jail for at least one month.

A man may not seduce a woman by lying, and claiming he will marry her.

Unnatural intercourse, if both parties voluntarily participate, results in a maximum sentence of 10 years and $10,000.

Cattle rustling is punishable by hanging.

In Natchez, it is illegal for an elephant to drink beer.

Adultery or Fornication (living together or having sex with someone that is not your spouse) results in a fine of $500 and/or 6 months in prison.

Exterior burglar bars which are viewable from the street are not allowed in Ridgeland.


MISSOURI Stupid Laws

It is not illegal to speed.

In Merryville, Missouri, women are prohibited from wearing corsets because "the privilege of admiring the curvaceous, unenbered body of a young woman should not be denied to the normal, red-blooded American male."

Single men between the ages of twenty-one and fifty must pay an annual tax of one dollar (enacted 1820).

It is illegal to have oral sex.


MONTANA Funny Laws

It is illegal to have a sheep in the cab of your truck without a chaperon.

It is illegal for a man and a woman to have sex in any other position other than missionary style.

One may not pretend to abuse an animal in the presence of a minor.

In Billings no person shall raise pet rats.

Seven or more indians are considered a raiding or war party and it is legal to shoot them.

In Montana, it is illegal for married women to go fishing alone on Sundays, and illegal for unmarried women to fish alone at all.

In Helena it is illegal to annoy passersby on sidewalks with a revolving water sprinkler.


NEBRASKA

It is Illegal for children to burp in church or the parent may be arrested.

A mother may not under any circumstances perm her daughters hair without a license or express permission from the head councils office.


NEVADA

You may still hang and kill someone if they shoot your dog on your property.

It is illegal to ride a camel on the highway.


NEW HAMPSHIRE

You may not tap your feet or nod your head in time with the tempo of any music in any bar or dinner.

You cannot sell the clothes you are wearing to pay of a gambling debt.

Picking up sea weed off the beach is an offence.

You may not run machinery on Sundays.


NEW JERSEY

It is illegal to park your car under a bridge.

It is illegal frown at a Police Officer, and you will be arrested if you say the word ' What ' at the same time.

If you have been convicted of a motoring offence you may not apply for private plates on a vehicle owned by you again.

Slurping soup is illegal, Unless a permit has been issued by the Chief medical practitioner.


NEW MEXICO

You may only read the edited version of Romeo and Juliet. (where all and any sexual references that are not politically correct have been removed)

Lunchboxes need special permission to be carried down the main streets in La Cruces county.


NEW YORK

It is illegal to throw a ball at someone's head for fun.

Clothes lines require a license.

Talking in elevators is illegal.

Slippers may NOT be worn after 10 pm.


NORTH CAROLINA

It is illegal to sing off key.

Elephants cannot be used to plow cotton fields.

If a man and a woman check into a hotel and register that they are married ( even though they are not ) then by State law they are legally married.


NORTH DAKOTA

Beer and pretzels may not be served together.

It is illegal to sleep with your shoes on.


OHIO

Women may not wear patent leather shoes in public.

It is illegal to offer beer to a fish with the intent of intoxicating it.


OKLAHOMA

It is strictly illegal to pull faces at a dog.

You will be arrested for taking a bite out of someone else's hamburger.

Tattoos are illegal.

Wearing boots in bed is unlawful.


OREGON

After washing up the plates they must drip dry only no dishcloths can be used.

Ice-cream is banned on Sunday.

Juggling is illegal.

Boxing with a kangaroo is illegal.


PENNSLYVANIA

It is illegal to sleep on top of a fridge. (outside only Its Ok indoors)

You cannot sing in the bath tub.

Housewives may not sweep the dust under the carpet.


RHODE ISLAND

You cannot smoke a pipe after sunset.

Impersonating the way an auctioneer speaks is illegal.


SOUTH CAROLINA

You may beat your wife on the Court house steps on Sundays with not offence being incurred.

Musical instruments cannot be sold on Sundays.

Dance halls must close on a Sunday.


SOUTH DAKOTA

Sleeping in a cheese factory is illegal.

Movies showing Police officers getting hurt are illegal.

If there are 5 or more Indians on your property you may legally shoot them.


TENNESSEE

Hollow logs cannot be sold they must be entirely solid.


TEXAS

Milking another persons cow is illegal.

It is illegal to take more than 3 sips of beer while standing up.

You need a License to be able to walk barefoot. (5 to 10 Dollars)


UTAH

You must drink milk every week, it is illegal not to.

You must ask for the wine list first or it is illegal to drink wine in a restaurant.

You can legally own a nuclear device but it is illegal to detonate it.

Fishing from horse back is an offence.


VERMONT

Denying the existence of God is illegal. Immediate arrest for this.

Women must obtain written permission from there husbands before wearing false teeth.


VIRGINIA

Police radar detectors are illegal.

Tickling a female is an offence, without their written permission.

You must honk your horn if you pass another car at the same estimated speed.

Washing mules on the side walk is an offence.


WASHINGTON

Lollipops are illegal to buy, illegal to eat. illegal to obtain in any which way. Rewards handed out to people informing on someone with a lollipop in their possession.

You cannot say that your parents are rich without being able to prove it. If you cannot you will be arrested.

You cannot buy meat on a Sunday.


WEST VIRGINIA

Snoozing on a train is an offence.

Wearing a hat in a theater is an offence.

Children cannot smell of wild onions in class.


WISCONSIN

It is illegal to kiss on a train.

Cutting a woman's hair is an offence.

You need a license to make cheese.

In certain cities :It is illegal to wake a fireman when he is asleep.


WYOMING

It is illegal to take a photograph of a rabbit in the month of June.

Women cannot drink at the bar but must stand 5 feet away. (measured)

FatherLen

tl;dr

EKClarke

EKClarke wrote: »

ALABAMA Stupid Laws

It is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle.

That seems reasonable.

Hogzy

Id say 99% of that is made up bullsh1t. Its hardly illegal to give or receive oral sex in california when it is the porn capital of the world.

chin_grin

Blog/Facebook ->

ejmaztec

jctftfl;dr

chin_grin

ejmaztec wrote: »

jctftfl;dr

Sunnyisland

Thanks, I shall remember all these if I ever go there ;)

AeoNGriM

So, exactly how many FB pages did you trawl to collect that gigantic pile of bland, useless drivel?

PandyAndy

EKClarke wrote: »

UTAH

You can legally own a nuclear device but it is illegal to detonate it.

Sure you can... :rolleyes:

Wompa1

What a load of fake BS. Why even post this?

ejmaztec

chin_grin wrote: »

tl;dr wasn't strong enough for the huge post, so I had to say - Jesus Christ That's Far Too fucking Long;dr

danniemcq

Yeah stephen fry thought it would make a good side quest on one of his travel tours to break a law like these in every state but it turns out each and every one was a load of balls.

he told about that one where you can shoot an arrow from the walls of somewhere at a welshman or somthing.

Turns out that any law thats made AFTER that law was passed nullifies any previous ones where they cover the same type of topic unless specifically stated. So the above law would have been nullified by unlawful taking of life or something like that.

EKClarke

Sorry folks it's all true.

AeoNGriM wrote: »

So, exactly how many FB pages did you trawl to collect that gigantic pile of bland, useless drivel?

Not on FB

danniemcq wrote: »

Yeah stephen fry thought it would make a good side quest on one of his travel tours to break a law like these in every state but it turns out each and every one was a load of balls.

he told about that one where you can shoot an arrow from the walls of somewhere at a welshman or somthing.

Turns out that any law thats made AFTER that law was passed nullifies any previous ones where they cover the same type of topic unless specifically stated. So the above law would have been nullified by unlawful taking of life or something like that.

These laws have not been nullified.

AnonoBoy

In After Hours it should be illegal to cut and past sh*te from forwarded emails. Especially when most of it is probably made up.

cml387

I know it's boring and all but 4 seconds search brought me to snopes

I don't seem to be able to partial quote this, but essentially it's all rubbish.

I am pie

Yeah, it's illegal to take more than 3 sips of beer while standing up in Texas...of course it is.

You're work/college pals must think you are just hilarious.

CardBordWindow

When I saw the title I thought 'Oh good, a non-recession thread'.








......now I wish this was about the recession.

danniemcq

I am pie wrote: »

Yeah, it's illegal to take more than 3 sips of beer while standing up in Texas...of course it is.

You're work/college pals must think you are just hilarious.

i don't know which part is more sarcastic, the "hilarious" bit or the fact he'd have pals.

danniemcq

EKClarke wrote: »

Sorry folks it's all true.


Not on FB



These laws have not been nullified.

Right money where your fingers type/mouth is

i'll wager a tenner on each one of these. for every one you can find in the state statutes (is that right) i'll give you a tenner. for everyone thats not you owe me

chin_grin

danniemcq wrote: »

Right money where your fingers type/mouth is

i'll wager a tenner on each one of these. for every one you can find in the state statutes (is that right) i'll give you a tenner. for everyone thats not you owe me

This suddenly got interesting! <follows thread>

danniemcq

chin_grin wrote: »

This suddenly got interesting! <follows thread>

Hey what can i say i put Stephens Fry word over random poster on boards who copied the entire post from somewhere