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getting pregnant after miscarriage
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23-11-2011 10:23am#1
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Hi Nbj,
Im so sorry to hear about your loss
Its a hossible horrible experience.
I miscarried at 7 weeks over a yr and half ago - after trying for 5 months. I was devastated - and started trying again straight away. It took me ten months to conceive again after that. They were the 10 longest months of my life - i was so obsessed and stressed out. Especially when my would have been due date came and went as i had really thought i woud have been pregnant by then. It was so so hard... I think the fact that i was so stressed about it probably contributed to the problem conceiving tho! You have to remember that it takes the average healthy couple 7 months to conceive - while its not what you want to hear its unfortunately the reality - something which i just did not believe no matter how many times i was told it! I think if i had accepted that i may have been able to relax a little! But its easier said than done, as after a miscarraige - for me nothing was going to make me feel better but to be pregnant again - so i appreciate its fine me saying all of this but it doesnt change how tough it feels on you I found the trying to convceive thread on here really great for support during the highs and lows of each month, the people there all know how your feeling and how frustrating it can be.
I conceived then after the 10 months and was extremely nervous- i had very bad pains aroung 6 weeks and was sureit was happening again - then i found out i was pregnant with twins at 7 weeks! Unfortunately we lost one twin at 9 weeks.... so that was very hard to cope with...another miscarraige yet i was still pregnant
Since then i'vebeen trying to focus on enjoying the pregnancy for the sake of the little baby that i do have - turns out she's a little girl!! Im 27 weeks now and can happily say all is going well! The journey to get here has been a bit gruelling but i know once i meet her every second of it will have been worth it! I wish someone could have told me somewhere along the way - dont worry in a yr/18 months you'll be 7 months pregnant with a bay girl - it would have made it so much easier to bear - the worst of it was the what if's..'what if i never get pregnant again' whatif i miscarry..etc etc - I think you just have to try and keep the faith - be positive - presume you will have a baby in a year or two and try to focus on that rather than the very short term. Do all you can to help the process like eating right, using a lubricant like preseed , have loadsa sex around ovulation time, but dont let yourself become too obsessed - it only leads to stress - which ineveitably delays pregnancy. Try and make your focus to be healthy and happy, and becoming pregnant will surely follow. Just take the pressure off yourself tho by remembering it does take months for most people - so a few months in a row does not mean failure - your just have to keep focusing on the positives a little longer and then your baby will come to you.
I hope this helps...its a bit rambly so im sorry for that!!:o0 -
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Dublinlady, Fri.Day thanks both for sharing your stories! And Congratulations to you both!
Dublinlady, will give the pre-seed a go, thanks for the advice, had never heard about that before.
You a right Fri.Day to keep busy in those 2 weeks instead of getting tied up in all the 'what ifs'.
Thanks again for sharing what you have been through and for all your advices, I really appreciate that - I'm sure its just a matter of time, maybe just a few months
The best to you both!0 -
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