when was the last time you lost your temper in public

flutterflye

Rocket19 wrote: »

Aw are you serious? Of course five year olds can have proper manners! They're not toddlers!

Little kid who I babysit regularly; he's only 5, and a couple of days ago I was picking him up from rugby (my Mum gave us a lift).
After he was like "can you tell you mum that I said thank you for picking me up". He's such a cutie! But it's called being raised well. I'm actually surprised you do have kids, because they're much smarter and more capable than you'd think.

I have highlighted the operative word for your convenience.

Rocket19

flutterflye wrote: »

I have highlighted the operative word for your convenience.

Yes, it is obviously possible for them to not have manners. It's possible for adults to lack manners too. That doesn't mean it's the right thing.

It's your reponsibility to teach the child manners. If it doesn't have any, then it's your fault.

hondasam

Loopy wrote: »

I didn't know she had eaten chocolate.
And after trying on about 30 outfits I was fit to fucking kill someone so logic went out the window.

Oh ya logic went out the window, another day looking for an outfit:pac:
you could go back to the shop and buy it if it's still there, easy option tbh.

stupidusername

Loopy wrote: »

Yep.

And you don't see anything wrong with that?

flutterflye

Rocket19 wrote: »

Yes, it is obviously possible for them to not have manners. It's possible for adults to lack manners too. That doesn't mean it's the right thing.

It's your reponsibility to teach the child manners. If it doesn't have any, then it's your fault.

Are you serious?
My responsibility, and my fault?
Oh, you have really given me some things to think about.
Gosh, I'd never have thought of any of that on my own.
Thanks.

Dudess

Edit: misread.

The last time for me - can't remember but probably a road rage situation. It's the only time I really lose the rag.

danslevent

Dear God, with all the bickering going on here it seems like most boardies probably go around picking fights with everyone. Or maybe just bottle it up all day and see red when they sit down at the computer...

stupidusername

Dudess wrote: »

She didn't leave the shop with the outfit not paid for, she just didn't get the outfit.

yeah....after her daughter made **** of it.

the sales assistant likely wouldn't have given a discount after the girl admitting it was her. people often stain clothes in shops, and the shops have to give discounts or pay to get them cleaned afterwards. are you really saying you don't see what's wrong with that?

AngeGal

ElleEm wrote: »

Regardless of whether the entrance was blocked or not, the OP's niece was rude in hitting off the man without acknowledging it, excited or not. and the OP was even worse for shouting about it and not seeing the point the man was making. If you bump into someone, you apologise- end of.

Don't understand this reasoning at all. If anything, the man was being rude by blocking an entrance with his friend. It's a 5 year old child, they are still learning manners and when excited about something, nothing else enters their minds, unless you know some incredibly mature 5 year olds.

He was obviously an eejit anyway. The vast majority of people I know would have went "Ah kids" or something like that. Had I been in the situation with one of my nieces and he referred to her as a 'brat' when he was BLOCKING a doorway, he would have been told to watch his mouth and get out of the way for customers, if he was so concerned about manners.

flutterflye

danslevent wrote: »

Dear God, with all the bickering going on here it seems like most boardies probably go around picking fights with everyone. Or maybe just bottle it up all day and see red when they sit down at the computer...

How dare you insinuate that I am picking fights.
You don't know me, or anything about me.
Are you suggesting that I have anger issues, or I am unhappy in life?
What gives you the right to judge me, and others posting here?
Are you perfect???

Rocket19

flutterflye wrote: »

Are you serious?
My responsibility, and my fault?
Oh, you have really given me some things to think about.
Gosh, I'd never have thought of any of that on my own.
Thanks.

Odd. I don't know you, neither was I criticising your parenting. Your sarcasm is unwarrented, thanks.

Obviously kids are going to mess up sometimes, because as you said, they're learning. But as a parent, if your kid does something wrong, it's your job to apolgise to anyone they may have'wronged' (or preferably make the child do it), as well as making sure they know what exactly it was they did wrong.

In the OP's situation, I don't think I'd personally be rushing over to that man saying sorry after he called the child a "brat" (I think she was rude though), but at the same time, you shouldn't not reprimand a child just because they "don't know any better". How else are they gonna learn?

Loopy

hondasam wrote: »

Oh ya logic went out the window, another day looking for an outfit:pac:
you could go back to the shop and buy it if it's still there, easy option tbh.

When your a single mother & work full time and have a couple of kids, another day looking for an outfit isn't optional at the moment but many thanks for the positive feedback.

stupidusername wrote: »

And you don't see anything wrong with that?

No.

Jesus, god be with the days you could have a rant in AH.
So many posters on the attack, I realise now why I rarely post here now.

flutterflye

Rocket19 wrote: »

Odd. I don't know you, neither was I criticising your parenting. Your sarcasm is unwarrented, thanks.

Obviously kids are going to mess up sometimes, because as you said, they're learning. But as a parent, if your kid does something wrong, it's your job to apolgise to anyone they may have'wronged' (or preferably make the child do it), as well as making sure they know what exactly it was they did wrong.

In the OP's situation, I don't think I'd personally be rushing over to that man saying sorry after he called the child a "brat" (I think she was rude though), but at the same time, you shouldn't not reprimand a child just because they "don't know any better". How else are they gonna learn?

I feel that my sarcasm was warranted actually, seeing as I had already made the exact same point as you are trying to make to me, a few times, a few pages back.

It was a way of me dealing with the stupidity of your post without becoming annoyed at the stupidity.

danslevent

Ugh, take this ****e to Jerry Springer.

hondasam

Loopy wrote: »

When your a single mother & work full time and have a couple of kids, another day looking for an outfit isn't optional at the moment but many thanks for the positive feedback.

I meant all the more reason to buy the one you found, save you the hassle of another day looking. I was not having a dig at you.

stupidusername

Loopy wrote: »

No.

Jesus, god be with the days you could have a rant in AH.
So many posters on the attack, I realise now why I rarely post here now.

On the attack? Hardly. you post up something bad that you did, you should expect somebody might have a problem with it. if you think that was attacking you, you should not be so sensitive.

if nobody's allowed to comment on what you said, why would you say it?

Rocket19

flutterflye wrote: »

I feel that my sarcasm was warranted actually, seeing as I had already made the exact same point as you are trying to make to me, a few times, a few pages back.

It was a way of me dealing with the stupidity of your post without becoming annoyed at the stupidity.

When I said "you", I meant "parents" in general, so there's no need to take things personally.

Trying to insinuate that I'm stupid doesn't emphasise your point or validate it in any way. All I said was that it's perfectly reasonable to expect young kids to have manners, which I stand by. End of.

Loopy

stupidusername wrote: »

On the attack? Hardly. you post up something bad that you did, you should expect somebody might have a problem with it. if you think that was attacking you, you should not be so sensitive.

if nobody's allowed to comment on what you said, why would you say it?

To clarify, the sales assistant laughed when she heard my daughters comment and had no issue with me not taking it.
I've worked in retail - its not a big deal.

I'm far from sensitive btw but don't particularly like the style of posting of some.

danslevent

Yeah, end of. Please.

flutterflye

Rocket19 wrote: »

When I said "you", I meant "parents" in general, so there's no need to take things personally.

Trying to insinuate that I'm stupid doesn't emphasise your point or validate it in any way. All I said was that it's perfectly reasonable to expect young kids to have manners, which I stand by. End of.

Why do you keep thinking that I took anything personally??
I knew you were not referring to me personally.

I am not trying to insinuate that you are stupid.
I am saying straight out that your post was stupid.

u_c_thesecond

wow this has turned into a serious bickering thread:D

Just to clarify something the M N S (lol) where i live has 1 door at entrance, then a narrow space of about 5 foot (where you can get baskets and put your umbrellas) and then another door that leads into the shop. The two people were blocking the 2nd entrance , thats what i ment by the 5 feet inside part.

After reading back over this i may have over reacted to the man, but i still feel i had the right to stand up for my niece. She was excited about getting a cupcake (easilly pleased) and ran into the man by accident. He could have easilly asked her to say sorry but he moved out of the way, let her pass and then called her a brat.

Abi

Loopy wrote: »

Jesus, god be with the days you could have a rant in AH.
So many posters on the attack, I realise now why I rarely post here now.

Don't worry, there will be a point when you realise, why should I give a fúck what anyone else says, your opinion / view is yours, you don't need validation from anyone, and most certainly not by the first page, desperate for attention post attackers on AH

Theres something to be said for people that jump at the opportunity to rubbish other peoples posts without having a valid argument / reason. It's their issues, not yours Loopy

Junco Partner

I lost my temper saturday at work and hit someone causing trouble. no bouncer on the door so i had to be the thrower outer. I understand now why bouncers are always so angry. not a nice job.

stupidusername

Loopy wrote: »

To clarify, the sales assistant laughed when she heard my daughters comment and had no issue with me not taking it.
I've worked in retail - its not a big deal.

I'm far from sensitive btw but don't particularly like the style of posting of some.

No it's not a big deal,but it's ignorant.

That's just my opinion

Sorry you feel that way about AH,but you should try not let the posting style of a few posters get to you. If we all did,no one would post here

Dudess

The guy in the OP seemed like an asshole though. Why do people think he was in the right?

foodie66

flutterflye wrote: »

Lol! You know some 5 year olds?!!

Obviously never had any yourself then?!
You will learn some day!

my niece is so shy i doubt she would even look at the man. Would get pretty miffed at anyone calling my niece a brat when i know she is not. Personally, I would have said sorry to the man on her behalf and given out to her for running - that is if he hadn't started insulting her or her parents.

pretty sure the majority of the goody two shoes reprimanding the OP would have reacted the same in the heat of the moment

Abi

Dudess wrote: »

The guy in the OP seemed like an asshole though. Why do people think he was in the right?

I've two takes on this;

a) When in public, people can be extremely ignorant of others, standing in the way or walking into you.

b) parents that don't control their children. YES they do as they please, they get excited etc., but it is the parent's responsibility to ensure that the child doesn't do exactly what that man did... ignorance towards others.


Children have no respect towards their elders, or property these days. My Mother kept us in line, as much as I argued against it over the years - she was right. I understand rewarding a child for good behaviour or bravery etc., but it's not a run-amok-fest. I despise children horsing around in shops, parents no where to be seen, yet if they ran into your trolley while arse-holing around, guess who looks like they're in the wrong?


Theres two sides to it.

The King of Moo

Dudess wrote: »

The guy in the OP seemed like an asshole though. Why do people think he was in the right?

I think some people need there to be a clear hero and villain in the story.

While I agree he was an asshole, I also think the OP's reaction was a bit OTT.

It was somewhat excusable due to it being an emotional outburst in the heat of the moment, I think posting about it later online assuming sympathy for her situation is a bit much.

I don't think anyone involved in the story comes out of it well.



As for myself, I don't recall every really losing the cool in public.

The other day, I futiley flicked a V-sign at the taxi driver who tried to kill me by speeding up and overtaking me as soon as I (cycling) indicated I was turning right. It's a good thing I mistrusted him and double checked before I turned as I would have run straight into him.

My gesture of anger was somewhat muted by the fact that:

(a) He probably didn't even look back and notice it as he sped away, and:

(b) my thick woolly gloves meant it looked like I was just holding up my hand, perhaps in a gesture of thanks at such a skillful display of driving, as my individual fingers weren't really distinguishable.

I probably tend to cause more people to lose their cool, as I'm quite mellow and very intolerant of incompetent road users (including drivers, cyclists and pedestrians).

My favourite, and admittedly childish, thing to do is to put my hand out as a signal to stop for people not indicating when they turn and cut ahead of me, then waving them on when I've cleared the junction they wanted to get into before I passed it.

It's antagonistic, I know, but I've no tolerance for people who don't indicate, and especially people who don't indicate and seem intent on calmly ploughing right through you.

It also works well for people trying to kill you at a pedestrian crossing.

foodie66

reprazant wrote: »

That is one of the most condescending posts I have seen in a long time.

I have a child that age so I know best. No matter what anyone else says, even if they have kids or have asked people with kids, they just don't know. Because I have kids. So I know.

you have ONE kid that age, it hardly makes you an authority on every 5 year old's behaviour

That is one of the most condescending posts I have seen in a long time.

Funny, i could say the same about yours.

saa

no no no no us Irish are so preoccupied with saying excuse me and sorry I'm surprised the man wasn't apologetic for being bumped into I would be first thing I say if someone gets in my way.

Hello, goodbye,excuse me, please, thank you are not words that are very important to me I think how we treat others and act shows much of what those words try and represent and we say them now without meaning them, although I do always say please and thank you :

Little children run around toddle off and bump themselves, they can't see their surroundings like we can.

We also tend to give out far too much over far too little, if a child is consciously doing something wrong or obnoxious grand but not for this when I was younger I was too embarrassed and scared of confrontation to apologise even though I felt sorry for something I didn't mean just had the tendency to go quiet, but that's why we can't expect that, as long as the behavior is neutral and not bad then we shouldn't make a fuss.

oldyouth

MyKeyG wrote: »

To say it was bad behaviour is a bit strong. Bad behaviour in my book is a child intentionally being bold. The kid was excited she was getting her bun (I'm sorry I don't care what they label it I'm not calling them cupcakes) and got carried away. It's perfectly natural. To call it bad behaviour or to suggest it's bad parenting is unfair.

Firstly, I never said it was bad behaviour, accidents (particularly with children) often occur . However, it was wrong for the child not to say sorry for what happened. In my opinion this was not the childs fault, as it was reinforced by the OPs stance. A mixture of bad parenting and poor attitude by the adult.

Frank Black

A couple of nights ago - we're always getting plagued with people calling round to the door trying to get us to switch to Sky, Eircom, UPC etc.
I really hate the way the try to be all sincere and friendly like they've been trained, but in some ways I feel sorry for them having to do such a ****ty job.

Anyway, was up to my eyes in stuff and there's a knock on the door - I've just put the 2 year old to bed and am preparing tomorrow nights dinner - as I'm trying to wash my hands to get to the door, about 5 seconds later there's an even louder knocking.

I open the door and there's a guy with a ****-eating grin plastered over his face and his little sky badge on his lapel - he tilts his head to one side and smarms his way through a "Hi!, how are you"

I just fix him with my patented 'dead eye stare', before clearly intonating "just **** off my property now!"

I did feel pretty bad about it later mind - he really got me at a inopportune time.

Loopy

Loopy wrote: »

I'm far from sensitive btw but don't particularly like the style of posting of some.

fcuk you i'll post how i like are you startin', are ya?!?!!!

MyKeyG

oldyouth wrote: »

Firstly, I never said it was bad behaviour, accidents (particularly with children) often occur . However, it was wrong for the child not to say sorry for what happened. In my opinion this was not the childs fault, as it was reinforced by the OPs stance. A mixture of bad parenting and poor attitude by the adult.

'Firstly' it's exactly what you said.

Failure by an adult to accept responsibility for bad behaviour by a child is a reflection on the adult.

Try to get what you said yourself straight if you plan to be taken seriously.:rolleyes:

Loopy

bluewolf wrote: »

fcuk you i'll post how i like are you startin', are ya?!?!!!

No, I'm all about the lovin'.
Want to go shopping for me later?

Loopy

Loopy wrote: »

No, I'm all about the lovin'.
Want to go shopping for me later?

can i cover you in chocolate after?

The King of Moo

Hhm, this thread and I seem to have some sort of weird, Shining-style connection going on.

Not an hour ago I was cycling along on my bike. There was a left turn into a carpark ahead and as I was getting close to it, going at a moderate speed, a car came from the carpark and stopped at the turn.

Because the car stopped, I was very close to the turn when it stopped, and, coming from the car's right, I had the right of way, I continued on past the turn.

At which point the woman in the car proceeded to drive out into the road, at a perfect speed and angle for us to crash.
Luckily I had remained alert and was able to suddenly apply my brakes to just about avoid this crash.

Now, I can forgive her for her near-fatal error.

First of all, she had only looked left, not right, so how could I have expected her to see me?
Second, she was busy talking on her mobile phone, so I should have realised that she would be a bit distracted.

But I uncharacteristically became quite angry, and shouted shouted something along the lines of "WATCH WHAT YOU'RE DOING!!"
I don't think she replied, as I think she was continuing her conversation, and she probably couldn't hear me from inside the car.

She did roll her eyes however.

I then shouted "BITCH!" which is not a word I like to use, but I was a little emotional and filled with unusual amounts of adrenaline.
Also, I had stopped my bike at this point and was blocking her way out, which was very rude of me.
Perhaps this is what caused her to finally respond with a raised middle finger (American-style, not a good old-fashioned flick of the V's! How crass!).

At this I merely shook my head in resignation and left (after checking it was safe to go).

I'd like to take this opportunity to publicly apologise to you, blonde lady in the silver...car, for delaying you, and possibly disrupting your conversation. Your expertly-rolled eyes, if nothing else, showed me that I was wrong and you were in the right.

I suppose you could look on the bright side: if I had been equally inattentive as you were, I might not have braked in time and you might have injured or even killed me, which might have really disrupted your day!

My most sincere apologies again,

The King of Moo.

xoxox

Loopy

bluewolf wrote: »

can i cover you in chocolate after?

Ooeerrr Matron!

rugbug86

foodie66 wrote: »

you have ONE kid that age, it hardly makes you an authority on every 5 year old's behaviour



Funny, i could say the same about yours.

LOL!

reprazant was mocking you!

Her statement of having a child that age is her mocking you saying that you know everything blah blah blah.

Ha! Brilliant.

flutterflye

rugbug86 wrote: »

LOL!

reprazant was mocking you!

Her statement of having a child that age is her mocking you saying that you know everything blah blah blah.

Ha! Brilliant.

No, she was (failing at) mocking me, not foodie66.

Eever

teddansonswig wrote: »

Or, this is one I hate, pushing your way onto a dart as soon as the doors are open..... thats really whats fueling my support for this poor aunty who only wanted to start an interesting thread.

not arsed apologising.

Agh! I hate this! I always stand back and let people off the dart before attempting to get on, everyone should be the same, it just makes sense! I was going to say that I don't think I ever lose my temper in public but now that you mention this I'm reminded that I actually have a couple of times on the dart. Having said that I don't lose my temper and start ranting and raving but if someone is being an idiot I'll address them and make sure to put them straight.

Example off the top of my head would be when it was snowing and everyone who could was getting the dart instead of buses. People trying to squash in were understandably frustrated that there was no room for them to get on and would start imagining they can see vast amounts of space inside and accusing everyone of just not moving into them. One woman managed to squash on and kept loudly proclaiming to her friend that there was plenty of space further in and isn't everyone so terrible for not moving while staring around at everyone. After her third of fourth time saying this, I called across to her and told her that there was absolutely no space at all for anyone to move and if she was so sure she could find a nice roomy position that we'd all gladly get out of her way so that she can get there and show us all how right she is. So she said "fine then, I will!" Everybody squashed back as far as they could and yet she still couldn't get through, it was impossible, at which point she kind of half laughed and said she couldn't get through. So I said "That's because we're all squashed in, none of us are enjoying it but it would be made a lot less unpleasant if you'd shut your mouth and stop wrecking everyone heads!" She just said nothing, my dad looked embarrassed and pretended not to know me but I got encouraging smiles and nods from many of my fellow passengers. I'm not sure I'd fully count that as losing my temper though, I could've said a lot worse to her.

rugbug86

flutterflye wrote: »

No, she was (failing at) mocking me, not foodie66.

Ok well whoever s/he was trying to mock, it just made me lol that s/he thought the post was a serious one

jackie1974

The guy in the OP sounds like a prat. As soon as he started calling the child names and judging the parenting of the childs mother he took away the OPs opportunity to apologise and show the child the error of her ways. He turned the situation hostile not the OP or her niece.

Yes children should be mannerly but so should adults. The guy should have had the manners not to block a doorway and not to berate the child and parent. The OP went OTT a bit but i'd see red if some fella spoke about my niece that way.

Big Nasty

jackie1974 wrote: »

The guy in the OP sounds like a prat. As soon as he started calling the child names and judging the parenting of the childs mother he took away the OPs opportunity to apologise and show the child the error of her ways. He turned the situation hostile not the OP or her niece.

Yes children should be mannerly but so should adults. The guy should have had the manners not to block a doorway and not to berate the child and parent. The OP went OTT a bit but i'd see red if some fella spoke about my niece that way.

Contrary to the belief of the majority of posters here, this thread is about loosing your temper in public, not whether the OP was right or wrong in her encounter. She simply gave her example as, I believe, the charter says you should.

Now what is your example of loosing your temper in public!?!

MCMLXXV

MCMLXXV wrote: »

Contrary to the belief of the majority of posters here, this thread is about loosing your temper in public, not whether the OP was right or wrong in her encounter. She simply gave her example as, I believe, the charter says you should.

Now what is your example of loosing your temper in public!?!

I lose my temper in public when people abuse "loose"

Frank Black

MCMLXXV wrote: »

Contrary to the belief of the majority of posters here, this thread is about loosing your temper in public, not whether the OP was right or wrong in her encounter. She simply gave her example as, I believe, the charter says you should.

Now what is your example of loosing your temper in public!?!

Sometimes the best threads are the ones that get dragged off topic by discussions of the OP's motives and morals.

jackie1974

MCMLXXV wrote: »

Contrary to the belief of the majority of posters here, this thread is about loosing your temper in public, not whether the OP was right or wrong in her encounter. She simply gave her example as, I believe, the charter says you should.

Now what is your example of loosing your temper in public!?!

Ooops you're right my apologies for taking this thread completely off track, I take full resposibility.

I don't loose my temper in public, I keep it all for at home. Street angel, house devil me.

du Maurier

bluewolf wrote: »

I lose my temper in public when people abuse "loose"

It seems like you're not saying that loosely either! There's only one "looser" when it comes to dealing with you:pac:

flutterflye

bluewolf wrote: »

I lose my temper in public when people abuse "loose"

Ah losen up bluewolf.
You will loose out if you don't.

Paulor94

OP is one crazy *****