My baby deserves a better home

emmabrighton

Heya OP,

I just want to add my two cents. I did not like the manner in which some posters jumped on the OP. Especially after she said that she is suffering from depression. Anyone who ever has had depression or lived with someone who has depression can understand how debilitating it can be. My first point - and its not a doggy or a baby issue - is that you seek out some treatment for your depression. There are free services out there if you need someone to talk to - it is important that you don't let that continue. Believe me, i know!

Also I am working on a project that focuses on depression at the moment and as another poster mentioned, Exercise Therapy is one of the 5 therapies suggested to improve your mood. It really does work and playing with a pup or going for a walk would be perfect for that. I see you mentioned that you are looking for someone to walk with. This, again, is an excellent idea because I get the impression that you are lonely at home all day so, socialising your lovely little Chewie with other dogs and mums will tick two boxes for you - exercise and socialisation.

There are plenty of people on this forum much more qualified than I am to suggest doggy training so I will leave that up to them. But I will say that when my OH and I got our 3rd cat a year ago she spent a bit of time in "kitten prison" - a.k.a a dark bedroom - when it just got too hard to watch her and work in the home office. It worked a treat for those really stressful hours when we were trying to get things done because I think she thought dark = nap-time.

Anyhoo, I just wanted to wish you all the best and I hope you, your toddler and Chewie have a lovely companionship for years to come.

xx

tk123

OP my guy goes to daycare and it's brilliant for them so if there's one near you I'd recommend you try it. The dog gets to play all day and will be exhausted when it comes home. Also I found it really settled my guy - loads of people commented on it. First they slagged me for being insane and sending him etc etc then when my dog was better behaved than theirs they soon changed their mind!! Training classes helped me a lot as well - I learned how to work with him and he loved learning commands and tricks.
Raising a pup is hard work and having a toddler as well you must be pulling your hair out at times - it can be overwhelming but it's worth it and I find it really rewarding.

Some training centers take gift shop vouchers btw so add them to your xmas list!

ziggy23

Hi guys
Thanks a mill for the replies. Am rushing out the door but will be back on tonight

Jelly2

Good for you Ziggy. I'm looking forward to hearing how you get on with training Chewie, who looks like a beautiful little chap. Like others, having endured the drama of puppydom, I can say you will not regret keeping him, and your toddler and he will be the best of mates in time to come. I think your idea of bringing Chewie out to meet other dogs is great, and it would be uplifting for you too; unfortunately, I can't help with this, but perhaps there is a dog play area somewhere near you?
Incidentally, I think Victoria Stilwell is great for guidance on training dogs. Her website is www.positively.com, and you can buy her books online too, which are really good. Anyway, as you probably know, there are some experts on this forum, so you will get loads of good advice if you ask! I am constantly learning new things from regular posters who really seem to know their stuff.:)

Jelly2

PS Is that your runner he is playing with in the photo??!!!!!!!!!!

ziggy23

Jelly2 wrote: »

PS Is that your runner he is playing with in the photo??!!!!!!!!!!

Yep it is:o He is not too bad with chewing things thankfully he just carries them around then drops them somewhere usually where I cant find them! I'm feeling a lot more positive now. I think another problem was I was not treating him like a dog at all really more like a baby! It is ok to leave him out the back garden for a little while (not for too long obviously in this cold weather!)

Jelly2

ziggy23 wrote: »

Yep it is:o He is not too bad with chewing things thankfully he just carries them around then drops them somewhere usually where I cant find them! I'm feeling a lot more positive now. I think another problem was I was not treating him like a dog at all really more like a baby! It is ok to leave him out the back garden for a little while (not for too long obviously in this cold weather!)

Absolutely ok, in fact it's good for him. If he can have a toy or two out there to occupy him even better (or he might starting digging a plants!). I find when I'm working at home at my desk that a gentle game of fetch doesn't distract me too much but gives one of our dog something to do and a little bit of exercise. I don't even have to look up from my work, she just shoves the ball into my hand and I hop it across the room! The other thing is you should definitely be trying to make him a little more independent, so that you don't feel too much pressure to be constantly entertaining him...so putting him into the garden for a while is definitely a good idea. He is a dog, and like you say, doesn't need you 24/7!

Jelly2

OP, I was just wondering how things are going with Chewie since your last post?

Odysseus

OP, I don't know how bad your depression is and please don't tell me on here. My suggestion would be take a bit of time to come to a decision, if you are in contact with a service about your condition talk to them about the impact of keeping him or rehome will have for you and how it may effect your condition.

It may be best for you to rehome, it could also effect your mood, especially if you rush the decision. Talk to people who are interested in you and if possible are netural about the rehoming issue. Your mental health needs to take priority here, so I would say the option that helps you the most is the one you need to go with. Just don't rush it unless there are reasons that require immediate action.

Best of luck with you decision.

ziggy23

Jelly2 wrote: »

OP, I was just wondering how things are going with Chewie since your last post?

Hi Jelly
yea things are much better now thank god. I think I just had a bit of a meltdown. I know it's ok to put Chewie out the back when I'm giving my son his tea or if he's getting a bit hyper. I think I was really treating him like another child too much and was afraid to leave him on his own for any length of time. He seems to have calmed down a bit too not crying as much when I leave the room doesnt want to be up on my lap 24/7...maybe he read this thread :pac::pac:

Odysseus wrote: »

OP, I don't know how bad your depression is and please don't tell me on here. My suggestion would be take a bit of time to come to a decision, if you are in contact with a service about your condition talk to them about the impact of keeping him or rehome will have for you and how it may effect your condition.

It may be best for you to rehome, it could also effect your mood, especially if you rush the decision. Talk to people who are interested in you and if possible are netural about the rehoming issue. Your mental health needs to take priority here, so I would say the option that helps you the most is the one you need to go with. Just don't rush it unless there are reasons that require immediate action.

Best of luck with you decision.

Odysseus thanks so much for your advice. I did go to to see somebody 2 weeks ago. I have got mild depression and have been taking meds for a few years now. I think I'm just very lonely and isolated. My family dont like to talk about it and get annoyed a lot if I ask them to take my son for a few hours. None of them like Chewie at all :eek: and I think I was listening to them telling me to get rid of him. Not one of them would offer to take him for a walk or anything. I'm definitely not getting rid of him. He is as cute and loves me to bits so I just couldnt do that to him. Were also getting into a routine and he'll be going to training classes in the New Year please god:)

ziggy23

Heres a few pics of him getting in the festive spirit :P Btw it's an empty pack of fags on the floor!!
https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-snc7/383846_10150438767474947_713304946_8747501_1668540857_n.jpg

https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/384086_10150438768119947_713304946_8747509_1840960105_n.jpg

https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/387485_10150438769149947_713304946_8747518_1497244090_n.jpg

westies4ever

I've just come across this thread - can i just say that chewie is ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS!!!

Glad you are doing better, puppies are hard work but he'll improve everyday if you keep up the consistency. I can also say that dogs (pets in general) are really good for depression - it must be the unconditional love they give!

Best of luck and a happy xmas.

ziggy23

westies4ever wrote: »

I've just come across this thread - can i just say that chewie is ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS!!!

Glad you are doing better, puppies are hard work but he'll improve everyday if you keep up the consistency. I can also say that dogs (pets in general) are really good for depression - it must be the unconditional love they give!

Best of luck and a happy xmas.

Thanks a million:) Yea he is a total chick magnet when I bring him out for walks..unfortunately it's men I'm attracted to :pac: Yes I think all pets can be good for depression. I've 2 cats too but they are not great ones for kisses and cuddles unless I've got a bit of salmon for them:rolleyes:

Jelly2

That's really great, and I'm delighted to hear. I always worry about the problems I read about on this forum! The key thing seems to be 'allowing' Chewie to be a bit more independent, which you have recognised and are dealing with. Going to classes should be enjoyable for you too actually, and good sport for him. As you say, you can do this! And don't let anyone persuade you otherwise.:)

ziggy23

Jelly2 wrote: »

That's really great, and I'm delighted to hear. I always worry about the problems I read about on this forum! The key thing seems to be 'allowing' Chewie to be a bit more independent, which you have recognised and are dealing with. Going to classes should be enjoyable for you too actually, and good sport for him. As you say, you can do this! And don't let anyone persuade you otherwise.:)

Thanks so much:) This thread has been amazing I've re-read all the posts a few times. It's really hard for non-animal people to understand sometimes. Their reply is usually negative:rolleyes: Yes I'm definitely looking forward to it and I'm sure little Chews will love it he's very sociable:D

bryaner

ziggy23 wrote: »

Thanks guys for your replies
I feel like such a horrible person now tbh I doubt I would have been able to go through with it. I'm just terribly stressed out at the moment I dont know whether I'm coming or going I got Chewie for company as I live just with my son and get very lonely. I was getting it in the ear from people saying I care about the dog more than my son!! Don't worry he is not going anywhere he is part of the family. I have him too spoilt that's probably the problem. I will have to start putting more effort in with the training. I'm a big animal lover and have taken in abandoned dogs myself so I don't know why I even considered it!!

Ziggy by the sound of things your suffering tough times atm, new baby and some blues and the added hassle of Ireland inc as well, the best thing to give you a good old dig out is a devious pup that you will enjoy training and when he's sorted you can watch your child having years of fun with Chewie.

Don't mind what people say about Chewie and your baby its none of their business, keep the spirits up missus and don't be afraid to look for a bit of help if things are getting on top of you..;)

ziggy23

bryaner wrote: »

Ziggy by the sound of things your suffering tough times atm, new baby and some blues and the added hassle of Ireland inc as well, the best thing to give you a good old dig out is a devious pup that you will enjoy training and when he's sorted you can watch your child having years of fun with Chewie.

Don't mind what people say about Chewie and your baby its none of their business, keep the spirits up missus and don't be afraid to look for a bit of help if things are getting on top of you..;)

Aww thank you yep I'm sure they'll be great pals the 2 of them are always trying to get up to mischief together! I had to separate them last night though as Chewie got a bit over zealous and was standing up with his 2 paws around toddler's neck doin the humping:eek::o Think he thought Chewie was hugging him

Odysseus

ziggy23 wrote: »

Odysseus thanks so much for your advice. I did go to to see somebody 2 weeks ago. I have got mild depression and have been taking meds for a few years now. I think I'm just very lonely and isolated. My family dont like to talk about it and get annoyed a lot if I ask them to take my son for a few hours. None of them like Chewie at all :eek: and I think I was listening to them telling me to get rid of him. Not one of them would offer to take him for a walk or anything. I'm definitely not getting rid of him. He is as cute and loves me to bits so I just couldnt do that to him. Were also getting into a routine and he'll be going to training classes in the New Year please god:)

Great, remember you are the most important one here, it appears that you would only give the dog to a caring and loving home, so he would be taken care of. Hopefully you will be able to stick with it, but if you have to revisit it, remember you have the right to change your mind. It's your decision, not your families or anyone here.

If you want PM and I may be able to suggest some services or supports for you depending on your area, if you feel you need somewhere to talk on a regular basis.

Best of luck to you and Chewie.

ziggy23

Hi guys
Just thought I'd post a few new pics of Chewie. He had a great Christmas he was actually allowed stay with me in my parents for 2 nights and was as good as gold so he now has a few new fans

Here he is opening his presents!
https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/385773_10150458971734947_713304946_8823571_120943910_n.jpg
https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-snc7/395558_10150458971964947_713304946_8823572_1802976519_n.jpg

And here he is with my little boy..pair of messers;)
https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-snc7/402650_10150457063199947_713304946_8816576_1493346433_n.jpg

Hope you all (and your pets!) had a lovely Xmas and Happy New Year to you all

Tranceypoo

Really glad things are working out for you Ziggy, it's nice to get an update on posters situations. You have a beautiful dog and a beautiful child

number10a

Love getting updates like this!! The pic with Chewie and your little boy is brilliant. They obviously get on great together!! Happy New Year Ziggy!!

Jelly2

Thanks so much! You've given me a positive stat to the day!

ziggy23

Hi guys:)
Just thought I'd update again and also to let other frustrated puppy owners what a difference a few months makes! Chewie is nearly 7 months now and is a different dog. He is actually quite lazy loves nothing better than to just lie on my slippers on the floor, he can actually sleep for hours:eek: Enjoys going for his 2 walks a day but doesn't be dying to get out all the time. He is a great little guard dog. Sometimes I bring him for a walk late if I don't have my son and he barks if there's any suspicious looking characters around:D He doesn't bother following me around anymore either:pac: I actually can't believe I was even considering giving him away:(
Here he is after getting a bath and then in his new raincoat!!

RosieJoe

Excellent news Ziggy, And I hope you are getting better in yourself too.

sparkle_23

What a gorgeous dog!! :D Love the pic of him and your son! Glad to hear you and Chewie are doing well, I remember seeing this thread before Christmas!

gud4u

Milder days and longer daylight = strolls with your son and chewie by the buggy, win win situation. It's not always easy admit things are tough and sounds like you just had a moment of panic.;)

I've just added number 4 to the pack and it's a little trying at times to sat the least.

Jelly2

I have been wondering all along how things were going, and was even thinking of looking up the thread again to see you a query! I am so glad that all is well; all credit to you for seeing it through, and for holding on to your lovely little dog.:)

Jelly2

I have been wondering all along how things were going, and was even thinking of looking up the thread again to send you a query! I am so glad that all is well; all credit to you for seeing it through, and for holding on to your lovely little dog.:)

ziggy23

RosieJoe wrote: »

Excellent news Ziggy, And I hope you are getting better in yourself too.

Thanks RosieJoe
I'm getting there. Have kinda found the cause of the depression so am on the way to recovery please god.;)

Jelly2 wrote: »

I have been wondering all along how things were going, and was even thinking of looking up the thread again to send you a query! I am so glad that all is well; all credit to you for seeing it through, and for holding on to your lovely little dog.:)

Aww thanks Jelly
Send me a query anytime! He is a great little dog needs a haircut badly! He just got neutered so will wait a week or 2.

gud4u wrote: »

Milder days and longer daylight = strolls with your son and chewie by the buggy, win win situation. It's not always easy admit things are tough and sounds like you just had a moment of panic.;)

I've just added number 4 to the pack and it's a little trying at times to sat the least.

Yes gud4u am looking forward to going for more walks. I also just started driving so we'll be able to go for days out Oh lovely what type of dogs do u have?

Thanks guys:)
Have to say I love this forum everyone is so helpful.

strandroad

Great news ziggy, happy to see you guys settled. Remember if you have a moment of doubt and live through it, it only makes you stronger!