The worst sex you have ever had with someone?

Kanoe

Snowie wrote: »

is this were we HI 5 ?

^5

Arawn

Kanoe wrote: »

stud


I'm too embarrassed to say really but more recently during a whimsical drunken escapade..(I don't do it very often)
her: open up that drawer there
wuh?
her: just put your hand into that drawer there
*does as told and find myself immersed in willy wonkas never ending magical dildo drawer. Pulls out first thing that comes to hand..so to speak.
her: no not that one
goes back for something else, not really sure what I'm looking for
her: noo, something bigger.
*gets up and leaves.

Still wondering why you left

Professey Chin

Arawn wrote: »

Still wondering why you left

Intimidation

hondasam

This is the best thread here in ages, some of ye really are dirty bastards.

Kanoe

Arawn wrote: »

Still wondering why you left

i was going to wait until she fell asleep and place them round her bed and turn them all on before I left. (I just wanted to go to sleep wasn't interested in swinging from the rafters with a couple of rabbits in hand)

ibarelycare

hondasam wrote: »

This is the best thread here in ages, some of ye really are dirty bastards.

Especially The Great Chinholio's ex :pac:

zenno

John Doe1 wrote: »

I'm pretty much a god in bed but im sure some of you mere mortals have some stories:p

met this girl a while back, she was a friend of one of my mates and we got on ok and she was drinking vodka most of the time. anyway she ended up coming home with me and we got into some loving and as i was making love to her she puked all over my bed and the wall socket and that was the end of that as she was not capable of continuing with the loving, that was the worst one i experienced. she pukes all over the place and goes to sleep and left me sitting there shaking my head. :pac:

hondasam

ibarelycare wrote: »

Especially The Great Chinholio's ex :pac:

Def that one, sick or what :pac:

cruiser178

zenno wrote: »

met this girl a while back, she was a friend of one of my mates and we got on ok and she was drinking vodka most of the time. anyway she ended up coming home with me and we got into some loving and as i was making love to her she puked all over my bed and the wall socket and that was the end of that as she was not capable of continuing with the loving, that was the worst one i experienced. she pukes all over the place and goes to sleep and left me sitting there shaking my head. :pac:

At least you got to finish yourself off.

Professey Chin

ibarelycare wrote: »

Especially The Great Chinholio's ex :pac:

Thats just bad memories all around

hondasam

zenno wrote: »

met this girl a while back, she was a friend of one of my mates and we got on ok and she was drinking vodka most of the time. anyway she ended up coming home with me and we got into some loving and as i was making love to her she puked all over my bed and the wall socket and that was the end of that as she was not capable of continuing with the loving, that was the worst one i experienced. she pukes all over the place and goes to sleep and left me sitting there shaking my head. :pac:

you should have continued without her. she was still warm :pac:

muracan

What was the significance of the wall socket?What had you plugged in?

Dante

A few weeks ago I went home with a girl after a club ridiculously drunk. It eventually led to the aul leaba where I must have spent a good 10 minutes drunkenly trying to get it up without success, and then when I eventually did, I came after about a minute. Needless to say the girl was less than impressed!! The next morning was so painfully awkward that I just pretended I remembered nothing, took a couple of her roommates bagels and got the hell out of there without knowing where I actually was or how I was gonna get home. Bad times, heh.

Dublin_Gunner

Arawn wrote: »

Still wondering why you left

She wanted it for him.

ibarelycare

I'm trying to think of the *worst* sex I've had. There have been some pretty bad ones, but nothing really stands out as being exceptionally awful.

One embarrassing one was with my last boyfriend. It was only our second time ever having sex and we were a bit drunk. We were going doggy style and kinda rough, and he pulled out and went to go back in a bit too enthusastically and it went into the wrong hole. It was such a shock and so painful that I just burst into tears

I have also fallen asleep during sex once or twice. I was extremely drunk at the times though...

zenno

muracan wrote: »

What was the significance of the wall socket?What had you plugged in?

nothing was plugged in but i got a fright when i seen her puke all over the place as the wall-socket is right beside the bed she could have electrocuted herself as it was a very large puke and the puke was still coming out of her mouth as it was touching the socket. imagine she died from electrocution how would i explain that one :pac:

hondasam

ibarelycare wrote: »

We were going doggy style and kinda rough, and he pulled out and went to go back in a bit too enthusastically and it went into the wrong hole. It was such a shock and so painful that I just burst into tears

I know it was painful but I'm in fits of laughter here, sorry

ThePower11

I remember a few years ago when i was around 17, sneaking behind the bins at the back of an Abrakebabra with this big fat yoke at around 4 in the morning after a lot of fat frogs, I had bought a taco chips, so we got down to business was going fine until she took her top off grabbed my taco chips and smeared it all over her tits and told me to eat it, needless to say I made my excuses and left. Dirty bitch.

MagicSean

zenno wrote: »

nothing was plugged in but i got a fright when i seen her puke all over the place as the wall-socket is right beside the bed she could have electrocuted herself as it was a very large puke and the puke was still coming out of her mouth as it was touching the socket. imagine she died from electrocution how would i explain that one :pac:

Yes, defying the laws of physics would be difficult to explain

Novella

Faith+1 wrote: »

Because you're a lady

pdbhp

The night my son was conceived.............









I'm going straight to hell.

Mr.Crinklewood

With my last girlfriend we got kinda drunk the second time we did it. We did it doggy style as I as getting no pleasure at all I withdrew aimed for an alternative hole...she then burst out crying!!

castletownman

ThePower11 wrote: »

I remember a few years ago when i was around 17, sneaking behind the bins at the back of an Abrakebabra with this big fat yoke at around 4 in the morning after a lot of fat frogs, I had bought a taco chips, so we got down to business was going fine until she took her top off grabbed my taco chips and smeared it all over her tits and told me to eat it, needless to say I made my excuses and left. Dirty bitch.

Probably would improve the taste by eating it off the chest of a sweaty fat wan

Dunny

DaaaaaaaaaaN wrote: »

A few weeks ago I went home with a girl after a club ridiculously drunk. It eventually led to the aul leaba where I must have spent a good 10 minutes drunkenly trying to get it up without success, and then when I eventually did, I came after about a minute. Needless to say the girl was less than impressed!! The next morning was so painfully awkward that I just pretended I remembered nothing, took a couple of her roommates bagels and got the hell out of there without knowing where I actually was or how I was gonna get home. Bad times, heh.

Dont want to think what you done with those bagels..

pragmatic1

ThePower11 wrote: »

I remember a few years ago when i was around 17, sneaking behind the bins at the back of an Abrakebabra with this big fat yoke at around 4 in the morning after a lot of fat frogs, I had bought a taco chips, so we got down to business was going fine until she took her top off grabbed my taco chips and smeared it all over her tits and told me to eat it, needless to say I made my excuses and left. Dirty bitch.

Classy lady.

cruiser178

ThePower11 wrote: »

I remember a few years ago when i was around 17, sneaking behind the bins at the back of an Abrakebabra with this big fat yoke at around 4 in the morning after a lot of fat frogs, I had bought a taco chips, so we got down to business was going fine until she took her top off grabbed my taco chips and smeared it all over her tits and told me to eat it, needless to say I made my excuses and left. Dirty bitch.

A fat young wan smeared in taco chips, your loss mate. I'd have dived straight in.

Sunnyisland

The Power 11 wrote: »

I remember a few years ago when i was around 17, sneaking behind the bins at the back of an Abrakebabra with this big fat yoke at around 4 in the morning after a lot of fat frogs, I had bought a taco chips, so we got down to business was going fine until she took her top off grabbed my taco chips and smeared it all over her tits and told me to eat it, needless to say I made my excuses and left. Dirty bitch.

Why did you buy the taco if you weren't going to eat it ;)

ringadingding

Once I was having amazing sex, but I came without the orgasm, it was nearing , then nothing, just shot the load without pleasure.

Weird, it fooking freaked me out.

Many times I've had sex when high when there's no chance to cum and the w@nk the next day is the best part ;-)

Jimoslimos

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

Eh...I just probably fess up here and admit the guy fell fast asleep while I doing my thang on top...doesn't say a huge amount for my skills...but that was 2002... I've come on a lot since then Any man who falls asleep NOW gets a poo in his bed.

It's narcolepsy you insensitive bi..ZZzzzzzzzzz

AnnaGram85

ibarelycare wrote: »

I'm trying to think of the *worst* sex I've had. There have been some pretty bad ones, but nothing really stands out as being exceptionally awful.

One embarrassing one was with my last boyfriend. It was only our second time ever having sex and we were a bit drunk. We were going doggy style and kinda rough, and he pulled out and went to go back in a bit too enthusastically and it went into the wrong hole. It was such a shock and so painful that I just burst into tears

I have also fallen asleep during sex once or twice. I was extremely drunk at the times though...

Sadly, I have experienced the 'wrong hole' thing - jesus it was mighty sore!