LETS ALL LAUGH AT PEOPLE WITH DEPRESSION!!

delthedriver

Jernal wrote: »

Nobody can tell you what you do and even if we do you need to take it with a pinch of salt. Talk to the doctors. If it helps, print out your post. I would say this though, anxiety is like any other illness. It can come back. Couple of sessions of psychotherapy and you might be fine. Or the lexapro and you might be fine. Judging by your post it sounded like the combination of both was what worked before, but only you know best.

Life is about quality of life at the end of the day. If medication works for you, it works, if counselling works for you, it works. All that matters is you find the thing that works and improves your over all well being. Try not to have reservations towards either. There are financial supports you can get. Health is number one priority.

Just my two cents,

+1

Health is wealth.

It does not matter which combination of treatments, counselling etc you avail of so long as it works for you.

Be kind to yourself and enjoy each day.

Life is for living! Enjoy!:)

I'm feeling so much better today. I can't imagine having to go through that again.

delthedriver

Karsini wrote: »

I'm feeling so much better today. I can't imagine having to go through that again.

Well done! Learn to live one day at a time. Enjoy life:)

picaaf

Karsini wrote: »

I'm feeling so much better today. I can't imagine having to go through that again.

there you go, good news!
you made the start, you'll find the way.
keep going.

Bananatop

Saw this today, might be of help to somebody, anybody maybe?

singsong321

Thanks for the replies, I really appreciate it. I think i'm geering towards going back to my therapist rather than taking medication again. I have no doubht the medication might help but in my view it would be a leap backwards compared to seeing my therapist. Thanks again

efb

First bad day in a while yesterday

efb

Off today for the first time in 3 months

delthedriver

To all my friends on this thread I wish you,

Joyeux Noel, Happy Holidays, Happy Hanukkah, Merry Christmas, Feliz Navidad

I guess this time of year is a really shítty time for a lot of people. I used to love Christmas but never get as excited about it anymore. Also it was my birthday last Wednesday (again something I don't get excited about anymore, a lot of crappy memories attached to it since a horrible breakup three years ago) and I probably spent more time being sad about the people who didn't acknowledge it than feel glad about those who did. I'm telling myself to try and start 2014 off with a more positive frame of mind but then there's a voice in my head saying "why should changing the calendar make any difference? You're still gonna be the same erratic mess on January 1st that you'll be on December 31st".

IT seems like there are some really innocuous triggers that I stumble across online that can turn my entire mindset upside-down, like there's no point in me even trying to sleep right now 'cause my mind is buzzing and I know it won't shut down for me even if I try. Anyone else think that it's the really trivial things - someone forgetting to say happy birthday to you, someone you haven't spoken to in ages removing you as a friend on Facebook or unfollowing you on Twitter, someone you thought you were comparable to having a great job or a relationship - that sometimes prove to be the most difficult to deal with?

I don't think I've ever had a physical panic attack, thankfully, but sometimes it feels like my mind experiences something very similar.

Maximus Alexander

Deleted User wrote: »

I don't think I've ever had a physical panic attack, thankfully, but sometimes it feels like my mind experiences something very similar.

I know what you mean. I've never had an actual panic attack but I've often lay awake at night with my mind racing through unpleasant thoughts to the point that it became unbearable and I had to leap out of the bed and go switch on the TV for some distraction.

I've learned to manage that, most of the time, and snap my brain out of those unhealthy thought patterns. But it doesn't always work.

glass_onion

Sad part of reality homer is people change.We all grow apart at times.We might lose touch with people we see from school or work.

Social media can be a fantasy at times.Seems to be norm you must have 1000+ friends.Then you realize how many are friends when times get tough.

Not giving med advice here *since of course its rightfully forbidden here*,But common thing that pops up now again is "facebook depression".Where we might see someone seems to be having a time of their life.Of course at times,it can appear to be a soap opera as the boring or non good things in life carefully glossed over.

Next year.try set small achievements.Life is unpredictable.I don't believe in this "everything happens for a reason" stuff.I think life can just throw us a hurdle we must overcome at times.

glass_onion

glass_onion wrote: »

Next year.try set small achievements.Life is unpredictable.I don't believe in this "everything happens for a reason" stuff.I think life can just throw us a hurdle we must overcome at times.

Neither do I.

"Everything happens for a reason", "things are meant to be", "what comes around goes around", "you can be anything you want to be", the whole concept of karma.....all of it is just complete bullshít imo. I can't help but feel that people who believe in these sorts of things are deluding themselves, 'cause it's easier to rely on tired old cliches than to actually think about life and realise how much of it is out of your control, how crap things can happen for no reason whatsoever, how you can really try and try yet constantly fall short of wherever it is you want to be.

I started thinking about suicide today, which is something I haven't done for quite a long time. When I say thinking about I mean in a very general and hypothetical sense but it clicked with me that choosing to kill yourself is one of the very few things in life that you could have complete control over. Unlike, say, getting a good job, making great friends, having a great relationship etc. (all things that rely on luck, on circumstance, on the actions and whims of other people) ending your life can be something that you, and you alone, have the power to do. I had to admit to myself that the idea of having control over some aspect of my life, even if just the ending of it, sounded really appealing. And, as twisted as this may sound, it just made me feel even more frustrated that I'm not the type of person who's capable of self-harming or overmedicating or actually making a serious plan about these things; I'm just about depressed enough to think about these things but it's as if not being able to seriously ever attempt them just makes me a fraud.

It just seems like for everything in life there are so, so many more things that can go wrong than can go right (if "things going right" is even a real thing). Recently I've been thinking about being on anti-depressants (it's been over 4 years now) and I'm realising that they're really not making my life any better, they just make me less bothered about things going wrong. But in some ways is that not even worse? I mean, is being completely apathetic to everything really any healthier than being in despair? Is it really any better to be completely indifferent to how crap your life, and hence not even bother to try and improve things, than to constantly be sad and frustrated about it?

Sorry I know this probably reads like some self-indulgent blog post or something but it's so much easier to type things down at complete strangers than to actually talk about them to people and sit in front of them, knowing that they're judging you, knowing that they now know that there's something wrong with you.

glass_onion

it's ok.Rant away.This is a sounding board and people are hearing you.It's good to talk.Life,can throw you lemons.Then when we overcome them i don't think we realize how strong we are or have become after facing them.

As i said in my last post.Nobodies life is perfect.Some hide it well.Others,yes i admit do get it plain sailing.

I am sorry to hear what you are going through.But,everything can be fixed.it takes time.and i know it may feel like an eternity. Don't give up though.Keep in touch here.

Drumpot

Deleted User wrote: »

Neither do I.

"Everything happens for a reason", "things are meant to be", "what comes around goes around", "you can be anything you want to be", the whole concept of karma.....all of it is just complete bullshít imo. I can't help but feel that people who believe in these sorts of things are deluding themselves, 'cause it's easier to rely on tired old cliches than to actually think about life and realise how much of it is out of your control, how crap things can happen for no reason whatsoever, how you can really try and try yet constantly fall short of wherever it is you want to be.

I started thinking about suicide today, which is something I haven't done for quite a long time. When I say thinking about I mean in a very general and hypothetical sense but it clicked with me that choosing to kill yourself is one of the very few things in life that you could have complete control over. Unlike, say, getting a good job, making great friends, having a great relationship etc. (all things that rely on luck, on circumstance, on the actions and whims of other people) ending your life can be something that you, and you alone, have the power to do. I had to admit to myself that the idea of having control over some aspect of my life, even if just the ending of it, sounded really appealing. And, as twisted as this may sound, it just made me feel even more frustrated that I'm not the type of person who's capable of self-harming or overmedicating or actually making a serious plan about these things; I'm just about depressed enough to think about these things but it's as if not being able to seriously ever attempt them just makes me a fraud.

It just seems like for everything in life there are so, so many more things that can go wrong than can go right (if "things going right" is even a real thing). Recently I've been thinking about being on anti-depressants (it's been over 4 years now) and I'm realising that they're really not making my life any better, they just make me less bothered about things going wrong. But in some ways is that not even worse? I mean, is being completely apathetic to everything really any healthier than being in despair? Is it really any better to be completely indifferent to how crap your life, and hence not even bother to try and improve things, than to constantly be sad and frustrated about it?

Sorry I know this probably reads like some self-indulgent blog post or something but it's so much easier to type things down at complete strangers than to actually talk about them to people and sit in front of them, knowing that they're judging you, knowing that they now know that there's something wrong with you.

I am really sorry to see you in this frame of mind, but I can relate to some of what you write.

I still get moments of desperation where I feel like its a horrible world that sucks the life out of me. I still get times when I feel like most of the people I know only want something from me and that I am only a worthwhile person when I am giving something back to others.

But these are feelings based on my thoughts. These thoughts are based on my perception of the world I see, depending on how I feel. The phrase "rose tinted glasses" is very appropriate in this case. I used to think that was only relevant to rival football fans who would only ever see the good in their own team and the bad in their rivals. I think the truth can be the case in how I perceive the world going on around me.

I am consciously trying to maintain an awareness of my mood and how I feel in certain situations. There are times when I can enjoy watching birds eat food in my back garden in absolute peace and relaxation. Then it might be the next day and I can be fidgety, anxious and constantly thinking about the things in life that worry or upset me. Why is this ? The world hasn't changed, the setting hasn't changed and the birds haven't changed . . Its because my feelings/mindset has changed. This used to drive me mad, but now I just try to go with it.

What I am finding I that if I expect to feel peace and serenity whenever I look at the birds feeding in my back garden, I will always be disappointed (and by extension potentially agitated) if I don't get the sense of relief that I get at different times. However, if I can learn to be aware and accept that sometimes this way in which I try to relax will not be effective, its a good start in me being able to do the same things in other aspects of my life.

I cant control how many good friends I have, but I can control how I let this effect me. I cant control how successful I am in my job, but I can control how I let this effects me. The way I used to judge my life always depended on my mood or how I felt. If I felt good, I felt that I was capable of doing anything, if I felt bad I feel like an unmitigated failure in everything I do and have ever done. This still happens, but I am able to snap out of it quicker and sometimes I can just go with it and ride it out.

Some people say that they have found the solution or do not suffer from depression anymore, well good for them. I haven't found it yet, but instead of focusing on perfection, I am trying just to learn good habits. I know that I used to focus on where I felt/imagined I wanted to be - Happy, confident etc, instead of even just accepting where I really felt I was - depressed, really lonely.

It goes back to my point that if I think if I have loads of friends, a nice family, a wife, children etc, that it will make me happy, then I will only focus on trying to achieve these things at the expense of focusing on my real problem. One of my problems has been that I never truly felt "connected" to the world I was born into. I have always felt alone and have always looked for things outside my control (friends, family, work etc) to help make me feel better, only to be continually disappointed when these things invariably didn't "work" the way I wanted them to.

In short, I really believe that the thing I need to do is to learn to be comfortable and happy with who I am. In a world that constantly markets the idea that we should never be happy with who we are or what we have in life, I find myself feeling like a lonely nomad going along with the madness simply to fit in.

But more and more, I am understanding that its ok for me to feel like that. I cant change the ills of how I perceive the world, I only need to learn to live in that world. I get it now. My feelings might be real to me but they are not a reflection of the world, they are only a reflection of how I feel about my life right now. The most important thing is for me to be aware of that and to learn to be ok with it. I don't need more money or more friends, I just need to feel ok with me.

I will not speak for anybody else but I really do think that some people are more prone to depression then others and while personal factors (money, family, bad things that happen growing up etc) can effect how bad this can be, I think we all have the capacity to overcome this affliction. Why can one person from the same family suffer completely different emotions growing up in the same household? We are all different, but I truly believe that the secret to a content life is hidden within us all. The biggest problem for me was seeing beyond my limited understanding that thought what I felt was an accurate reflection of my life.

DeVore

I dont believe in that "fate" stuff either. If you want things to happen, you have to get out and make them happen for yourself. As the man said, the more I practise the luckier I get.


But when I was lying in bed with a broken leg, a broken spirit and well, broke, I wanted to get two things tattooed on my shoulders and they were:
"All good all the time" and "This too, shall pass".

What I thought was the worst year of my life actually was the best. My leg healed and taught me that I still have a very strong will. My father recovered from his heart attack and we have a better relationship than ever and my company which failed lead me to work more on Boards which succeeded. I'm not saying that was fate, I'm saying that the worst experiences can often be the best experiences when looked back on. Life is , believe it or not, all good, all the time.

"This too, shall pass" means several things. It means to remember that this body is temporary and to live each day as best I can. It also means that it cant rain all the time. It literally CAN'T
What I'm realising lately is that its like when you hit a patch of ice on the road... the best thing to do is nothing, dont try to steer etc, just ride it out. When I hit a bad patch now, I do the same. No big decisions, no trying to take on more things to do or push myself, no thinking about the bigger picture... just ride it out. This too, shall pass.

Happy xmas everyone.

Call Me Jimmy

Usual story with me, I get a decent thing going and think I might be on the right track and got up this morning and looked in the mirror and christ.

I keep thinking I'm getting to a place of acceptance but I never really do. More isolation on the cards BECAUSE of my feelings, it never precipitates them.

glass_onion

Call Me Jimmy wrote: »

Usual story with me, I get a decent thing going and think I might be on the right track and got up this morning and looked in the mirror and christ.

I keep thinking I'm getting to a place of acceptance but I never really do. More isolation on the cards BECAUSE of my feelings, it never precipitates them.

Anything in particular bothering you?.

I feel so much better than I did last week!

I'm still bearing the scars of a panic attack, pulled a muscle in my chest, but I'm perfectly fine otherwise. Managed to get to the bottom of what's been troubling me lately and I feel a million times better for it.

Call Me Jimmy

glass_onion wrote: »

Anything in particular bothering you?.

Skin and hair. Hair (lack thereof) mostly, but the skin adds another layer of embarrassment. I'm completely obsessed. The problem is sometimes I can see it as not as a bad for a couple of days and then I wake up to a sight that is literally shocking.

efb

Fcuk me I need a hug or some affection after a bad day

nesf

Due to pharmacy screw-up no lithium right now. Mood is going up, trouble sleeping ideas, ideas starting to get wild and broad, overly talkative, every sentence has a few more words in it than necessary (bipolar people will understand). Was going up before the stopping of the meds, it might have happened with them or have stayed capped at the low bubbling that it was, I don't know.

Eh. No sleep so I can see the GP tomorrow, get a script and get back on the Lithium might be a good idea. Should be fine, no worrying symptoms yet. This might be nothing but placebo? Hopefully anyway. Well, I'm not sure if there's a difference actually, up is up after all.

Gongoozler

Feeling completely worthless. Have nobody, nobody cares, can't face my ****ing awful job tomorrow, have no where to go. And my boyfriend has made it clear he has no feelings for me.

glass_onion

Call Me Jimmy wrote: »

Skin and hair. Hair (lack thereof) mostly, but the skin adds another layer of embarrassment. I'm completely obsessed. The problem is sometimes I can see it as not as a bad for a couple of days and then I wake up to a sight that is literally shocking.

If going bald then shave it off.or shave it close.Women like bald men.Or perhaps take a visit to gentlemans club or beauty forum and talk about it there .

glass_onion

Gongoozler wrote: »

Feeling completely worthless. Have nobody, nobody cares, can't face my ****ing awful job tomorrow, have no where to go. And my boyfriend has made it clear he has no feelings for me.

Could you ring in sick or ask someone to cover?.Sorry to hear about your bf.

Call Me Jimmy

glass_onion wrote: »

If going bald then shave it off.or shave it close.Women like bald men.Or perhaps take a visit to gentlemans club or beauty forum and talk about it there .

Yes, I do shave it pretty close any way it just feels like a loss of identity and becoming 'just another bald guy' in that I'll be less distinguishable from any other guy with no hair, if you know what I mean?

Also feel like I don't have the right to be youthful in the way I act, like I look too old for my personality which will be jarring.

I have to be honest though all together I don't think I will go the distance with this. Too much of my life has been taken away, I mean the life within me, vitality.

glass_onion

I think at times,we are our own worst critic.As we get older,it is not like in school where had the cutest boy/girl,we find our match and connections by chance or luck.It's about confidence at times and a connection.if you read threads on how people met their other half's you see some good stories there.

Call Me Jimmy

Yes I appreciate that, it's more a case of living with myself. I don't really leave the house any more and in many ways feel finished. It's cumulative years of an obsession, in the truest sense of the word that has left me pretty much a shell of human. It is now in a place where I am not sure I could even make an effort to change.

Thanks for reading.

glass_onion

You don't always have to go the pub.The Gym and other interesting social gatherings are another good place to meet people and build on confidence.

Call Me Jimmy

I find it hard to even go to the shop. And some days I would flat out refuse to even do that. From what I was to what I am is the most heartbreaking thought I can think of about myself. It's terrible because I got a taste of the absolute best of life with no need for any worry, in fact the opposite, the world was my oyster.

However now, I feel even if I get to a point of functioning or even enjoying life, I will always be at 50% capacity, with this stuff weighing heavily on me no matter what I do, where I go. It's a part of me now, and the big decision for me is whether it's worth even going out and living life at all. At the moment I don't feel it is, so I sit.