LETS ALL LAUGH AT PEOPLE WITH DEPRESSION!!

Gleeso_Finglas

Lollipops23 wrote: »

Just had a look at the Aware site (for some reason never occurred to me until now) and they have a support group not 10mins from my house.

Anyone have any experience of these groups?

Chiquitita wrote: »

Fair play for volunteering. Hope it goes well for you

The other day my therapist gave me a tip and it's working for me so I said i'd share.

For me I have a few particular things that make me anxious in that I always think of them. The therapist said to allot a certain time of the day to think about these things. So, if they come into my head during the day I imagine a door and I say to myself i'll think about these at whatever time. She also said to write about them at the particular time if I feel like it. I havent done that yet but pushing them away until im "allowed" think about them is working. Well, it's small steps but they're good steps.

Hope it works for others and hope you're all well. Bed time!

Thats a really good technique..ive learned something like that with the lifeskills programme with aware. It has a good effect.
Bad thoughts are like bullies. They more you stand up and take no crap the smaller they will feel. But it takes time and patience.
You seem to be starting to get a hold of some thoughts C. Fantastic

Gongoozler

Well I've gotten a new job and given my notice do. I'm relieved to be out of there soon, but already the worry has begun over the new place.
I'm going to try enjoy the notice period anyway.

Vito Corleone

Anyone else on Effexor experiencing really intense and vivid dreams? These dreams are just crazy, they're really long and usually involve people I know. They have complex plots and I usually remember most of them the following morning. They all seem to have a negative theme to them. Not the worst side effect, but strange all the same.

lukesmom

Vito Corleone wrote: »

Anyone else on Effexor experiencing really intense and vivid dreams? These dreams are just crazy, they're really long and usually involve people I know. They have complex plots and I usually remember most of them the following morning. They all seem to have a negative theme to them. Not the worst side effect, but strange all the same.

Hi I'm in cymbalta which is like effexor and my dreams are off the wall! The other night I dreamt I was holding a ladybird in my hand and I kept worrying that it would fall under wooden floor boards that were loose, this went on for ages

degausserxo

Vito Corleone wrote: »

Anyone else on Effexor experiencing really intense and vivid dreams? These dreams are just crazy, they're really long and usually involve people I know. They have complex plots and I usually remember most of them the following morning. They all seem to have a negative theme to them. Not the worst side effect, but strange all the same.

I've has some seriously strange dreams on Effexor that make no sense whatsoever - the most recent being finding a kitten in Dublin city and bringing it home to keep it in the drawer under my bed... Dream me then shaved the kitten and it turned into a piglet, and my flatmates kept at me to slaughter it for dinner! It's strange alright but I actually look forward to dreaming because they're always so bizzare!

Calibos

Do you people normally have dreams that DO make sense??

Cymbalta has made my dreams more vivid and easier to remember but they are still as non-sensical as they always are.

Mars Bar

Mine were bat-**** crazy, sic-fi blockbuster material.

One was some weird animal sanctuary that we were locked in side of with lots of radioactivity and I was communicating with the outside world to break those people in so we could escape with the animals.
Another one was me and my family flying away from evil things (can't remember what they were) and buying nintendo wii controllers to help me fly faster

The One Doctor

Calibos wrote: »

Do you people normally have dreams that DO make sense??

Cymbalta has made my dreams more vivid and easier to remember but they are still as non-sensical as they always are.

The perfect opportunity to experiment with lucid dreaming!

For anyone trying to interpret their dreams, don't. Dreams are just the minds way of sorting through the day and figuring out what it really needs to learn.

Gremlinertia

My dreams pretty crazy too. Involve real people and places, but all mixed up in time periods and rather improbable situations, but often so realistic that i have to double check things.. Pretty embarrassing at times.

TommieBoy

I am not fond of dreaming ...but tend to dream alot and in detail and they aren't very pleasant.

On my third official counseling session. Don't know why I didn't do this earlier, it really helps my outlook.

Peanut Butter Jelly

So my mam and dad may have absolutely no idea of the pain I'm going through after talking to them for 2 and a half hours. Dad left the house saying no more than "get yourself sorted" before leaving. Mam made it about herself as usual and I've found the rope I had last February. I'm currently thinking if I should cut my wrists and show them, or call them outside tomorrow and let them watch the show.

efb

Peanut Butter Jelly wrote: »

So my mam and dad may have absolutely no idea of the pain I'm going through after talking to them for 2 and a half hours. Dad left the house saying no more than "get yourself sorted" before leaving. Mam made it about herself as usual and I've found the rope I had last February. I'm currently thinking if I should cut my wrists and show them, or call them outside tomorrow and let them watch the show.

like Michael, keep fighting - call the Samaritans

Peanut Butter Jelly

efb wrote: »

like Michael, keep fighting - call the Samaritans

I've called Samaritans already, it was useless, I am sitting here right now and thinking about death. Nearly a year ago, I was in the same position and was six inches from death. I'd much prefer to be six foot down right now.

efb

Peanut Butter Jelly wrote: »

I've called Samaritans already, it was useless, I am sitting here right now and thinking about death. Nearly a year ago, I was in the same position and was six inches from death. I'd much prefer to be six foot down right now.

I was the same too, less that 1 year ago, now I have a new job and things have improved. Call someone this evening, a friend, a helpline, someone.

Calibos

The One Doctor wrote: »

The perfect opportunity to experiment with lucid dreaming!

For anyone trying to interpret their dreams, don't. Dreams are just the minds way of sorting through the day and figuring out what it really needs to learn.

When I say nonsensical, I mean a time and space jumping unconnected mish mash etc. I'm not one to try and interpret or find meaning in my dreams. However, one can usually see where elements of the mish mash came from. ie. "Oh yeah, I was thinking about that yesterday...ah, saw a program about that the other day" etc etc

As for Lucid dreaming :rolleyes: Just the other day I had a dream that sent me into the dumps for the whole day, reminded me about deficiencies in my life and caused a few teary episodes throughout the course of the day.

In the dream I was finally getting together with a girl I fell for unrequitedly about 15 years ago. I realised I was dreaming or certainly said within the dream, "Aha, I think this is a dream" and yet couldn't take control. Several circumstances one after the other in the dream meant I didn't end up with her in the end. Then I woke up. So not only did I sabotage my chances with her in real life but also in my unconcious dream state :rolleyes:

It just brought all my lifes regrets to the fore again in my mind which upset me for the whole of that day. Thankfully, the next day I had re-established perspective and my optimism returned

Call Me Jimmy

Peanut Butter Jelly wrote: »

So my mam and dad may have absolutely no idea of the pain I'm going through after talking to them for 2 and a half hours. Dad left the house saying no more than "get yourself sorted" before leaving. Mam made it about herself as usual and I've found the rope I had last February. I'm currently thinking if I should cut my wrists and show them, or call them outside tomorrow and let them watch the show.

Peanut Butter Jelly wrote: »

I've called Samaritans already, it was useless, I am sitting here right now and thinking about death. Nearly a year ago, I was in the same position and was six inches from death. I'd much prefer to be six foot down right now.

I think about death all the time, there's nothing wrong with that, in fact it can be used as a mental technique to help stop identifying with transitory circumstances.

Can I ask you something, from someone who has been and could again be in your situation, not only dealing with constant mental spasming but feeling frustration that people can't seem to get how much pain you are in.

I honestly got to rock bottom and said to myself, 'what difference will it make to my experience of life if people don't fully understand how much I'm suffering? I will suffer the same amount whether they know or not'. It is a source of great strength when you get to the stage that you can try communicate how bad you feel but when it fails realise it can't give you comfort and it won't make you better.

For example, if you slit your wrists in front of your parents, or show them the scars (I don't mean to actively hide them though), what would you expect or want from the situation? Validation that you are hurting? Okay suppose they give you that, and say 'this is incredible, I didn't know you were suffering that bad'. The penny drops and they have been shaken.

Then what would you want to happen?

Peanut Butter Jelly

What would I want to happen? I just want them to understand that I'm not mentally ill. I don't have a disease. I don't have to quarentined in case I pass it on. I just want them to understand that I've had a bad patch in my life, and how bad it is.

mickman

Peanut Butter Jelly wrote: »

What would I want to happen? I just want them to understand that I'm not mentally ill. I don't have a disease. I don't have to quarentined in case I pass it on. I just want them to understand that I've had a bad patch in my life, and how bad it is.

Try going to an aware meeting

picaaf

Peanut Butter Jelly wrote: »

What would I want to happen? I just want them to understand that I'm not mentally ill. I don't have a disease. I don't have to quarentined in case I pass it on. I just want them to understand that I've had a bad patch in my life, and how bad it is.

Maybe this "old-fashioned" approach may work:
Write it down, all of it, yes: pen and paper!
It will probably help yourself when it's put into writing.
Don't let it sound moaning, just make it sound factual.
Read it again (or copyprint for re-reading), put it in an envelope and send it to your parents: yes, envelope and stamp! .

p.s. Be strong, as strong as you possibly can.

Call Me Jimmy

Peanut Butter Jelly wrote: »

What would I want to happen? I just want them to understand that I'm not mentally ill. I don't have a disease. I don't have to quarentined in case I pass it on. I just want them to understand that I've had a bad patch in my life, and how bad it is.

But I am assuming you have tried to get them to understand and know how bad it is. That apparently has not worked. If they think you are mental ill, and that you have a disease, and that you need to be quarantined, that sounds like they are aware you have had a bad patch, no? Is the problem that you think they are ashamed of you or that they are overprotective (I'm assuming you live with them?)

Gleeso_Finglas

Peanut Butter Jelly wrote: »

So my mam and dad may have absolutely no idea of the pain I'm going through after talking to them for 2 and a half hours. Dad left the house saying no more than "get yourself sorted" before leaving. Mam made it about herself as usual and I've found the rope I had last February. I'm currently thinking if I should cut my wrists and show them, or call them outside tomorrow and let them watch the show.

Hi how are you today??

Gleeso_Finglas

Peanut Butter Jelly wrote: »

So my mam and dad may have absolutely no idea of the pain I'm going through after talking to them for 2 and a half hours. Dad left the house saying no more than "get yourself sorted" before leaving. Mam made it about herself as usual and I've found the rope I had last February. I'm currently thinking if I should cut my wrists and show them, or call them outside tomorrow and let them watch the show.

Hi how are you today??
Listen you dont have to harm yourself to get them to notice or to take how serious the situation is. There is a couple of ways pal.

Go to your GP or a psychiatrist and get them to arrange a family meeting.

Go to a&e if you feel like you are going to hurt yourself and they will contact your parents.

Arrange an appointment with Pieta house they will also explain this to your parents as it sounds to me they are scared and need to need to be educated on your illness "bad patch". I gaurntee this would help both ypu and your parents going forward.

Please dont take this to heart but you said above you are not mentally ill but you have tried to hurt your self before with in inchs of your life. Im sorry but you have some sort of mental illness where its something that can be sorted with meds or therapy. Go speak to your doctor please because you seem to be dismissing it as if you are ashamed to say ypu have a mental illness. Dont be its very normal nowadays you just might need educated on it so you can learn how to deal with it. The sooner you accept it and decide to take action. Dont let this go on any longer take action pal.

Gleeso_Finglas

Vito Corleone wrote: »

Anyone else on Effexor experiencing really intense and vivid dreams? These dreams are just crazy, they're really long and usually involve people I know. They have complex plots and I usually remember most of them the following morning. They all seem to have a negative theme to them. Not the worst side effect, but strange all the same.

Fook me I am on that medication and all my dreams feel so real and it effects my emotions so I wake up in bad form. It really annoys me and I feel like crying every morning. So yea I hear you.

pinkstars

How does physical activity help with anxiety and depression?

Contemplating going on a lunch time stroll.....I know I should, but...:eek:

Trying to persuade myself here.....

scopper

Peanut Butter Jelly wrote: »

What would I want to happen? I just want them to understand that I'm not mentally ill. I don't have a disease. I don't have to quarentined in case I pass it on. I just want them to understand that I've had a bad patch in my life, and how bad it is.

I hope you are feeling a little better today. I'm a sufferer of depression and anxiety (I am 29 now) and I very much understand your situation. I have thoughts about suicide on a consistent basis (it's more common with people than you imagine). I no longer cut, but I understand the impulse. Today I sit in my room and although people know my situation few of them have ever really understood it. Most never will. I still have close friends who call antidepressants a luxury, etc. You will not find solace in that kind of acceptance. The best approach is to seek out either professionals (a good GP, I suggest a woman from experience). Talk to them honestly and directly and affirm that you need something to get you over the current hump. It might just be some xanax to calm you down or something more long-term to really shake things up, but do something about it. You will be amazed at just how much a call to the doctor can relieve the sense of being trapped.

scopper

pinkstars wrote: »

How does physical activity help with anxiety and depression?

Contemplating going on a lunch time stroll.....I know I should, but...:eek:

Trying to persuade myself here.....

It helps with anxiety just to be out and about. The reminder that you are capable of doing stuff without anything happening is always good

Maximus Alexander

pinkstars wrote: »

How does physical activity help with anxiety and depression?

Contemplating going on a lunch time stroll.....I know I should, but...:eek:

Trying to persuade myself here.....

Obviously results vary from person to person, but for most people physical exertion has quite a pronounced effect on mood and state of mind. I would highly recommend going for that walk, and if you can, maybe up the stakes a bit and look in to doing something like c25k.

It's not a definite panacea, but in a hell of a lot of cases it will, at the very least, help. Personally, exercising regularly completely alters my mood profile from one end of the week to the other. It doesn't solve whatever underlying issues you might have, but it could make it easier for you to tackle them.

Gleeso_Finglas

pinkstars wrote: »

How does physical activity help with anxiety and depression?

Contemplating going on a lunch time stroll.....I know I should, but...:eek:

Trying to persuade myself here.....

Anxiety is realease of adrenaline in the body so.... exercising helps to use up some of that and also it releases endorphines in the brian which is a feel good chemical so dont stroll...walk fast get the heart rate up if you can. I still cant get up the courage to get exercise even though I know over time it will help.

Drumpot

Hi All,

Just checking in . Been reading a lot of whats being written here and just wanted to make some general comments for those to take what they will from it.

In all cases I am soley speaking from my personal experiences and what have worked for me.

CBT - cognitive Behavioural Therapy

If you do not know what this is and/or have never tried it as a solution to your current predicament, you should consider it. Its not for everybody but it worked for me.

One of the most important things for me was that I had gotten to the stage where nothing worked - medication, therapy, exercise. All helped in their own ways and in others had their downsides.

The problem for me, on reflection, has been my thought process and my interpretation of events that happen in my life.

Lets take an example that somebody mentioned is a current issue they have - Parents lack of understanding/empathy about their pain. I can tell you to this day my parents still don't fully understand whats going on with me but unlike when I was at my lowest feelings, it really doesn't upset me anywhere near as much as it used to.

CBT helped me focus on the things that matter and put certain feelings I was having into context.

Not only do my parents not understand me, but they tell me to snap out of it or stop being lazy. They say I have nothing to be upset/depressed about and that its all in my mind.

This used to drive me mad. Not only did I feel like sh*t, but I thought those who were closest to me didn't want to understand or care about how I felt. They looked at me physically and financially and thought I had no reason to feel down.

However, I have learned that feeling like this serves no purpose and more importantly that I had the power to not let this parental pain get to me. I already feel like sh*t. My parents are going to be the way they are whether I get more upset about it or not. So how do I make it that it doesn't annoy me? Well, I am not qualified enough to go into exactly how it works, but its a matter of exercising your brain to react differently to situations that used to baffle or upset me. The kind of trivial things (and not so trivial) that would stop me in my stride and could turn an ok day into a tragedy (a tragedy that was infolding in my head , not physically around me).

One of the key things was participation and training on how to change my thinking. I was very defeatist and thought that this was as good as it got. Sometimes I still get like that but I am much quicker able to get myself out of a black hole. Sometimes the world can seem like the most horrible place to live and at others I nearly tear up at some of the beauty it offers.

Accepting that I was unable to continue to live the way I was living was a first step. Taking the next step took me decades and trust. I started out different things in trying to take back my life. I changed doctor (as what I had tried wasn't working with my previous doctor), I tried councelling (personal/group), tried medication, tried speaking with friends/family. Most of this helped in some way, but no more then I could fix a car without getting some sort of training/tuition, I needed a professional to help guide me to a newer way of thinking and living.

Its amazing because I was so deluded. I thought that if I couldn't fix the problem that existing (literally) in my head that nobody could. If I didn't agree with some sort of advice or alternative method of councelling I would dismiss it without trying. Sort of like a judge/jury/executioner kind of decision making process in my head.

I only begun to make huge progress when I was prepared to make my mental health my number 1 priority and actively did actions to try and find out what might work for me.

I read so many people here speak about if only, which is the way I used to be, but its the kind of self pity that prevented me from focusing on the REAL problem, which was inside me:

• If only I was more financially stable
• If only I had a partner it would be easier to get through this
• If only I had a job I liked, I would be much happier
• If only my family understood it would be easier to deal with how I feel

I am not having a go at anybody. Everybody needs support and having things easier in your life can help, but I found that if I focused on these things at the expense of what I really needed to do (work on my own pain), then I consistently just found myself stuck in a rut.

A victim can be defined as a person harmed as a result of an action. I allowed myself to remain a victim as long as I had reasons (posted above) why I had a right to feel sh*tty. Then when I didn't have a reason to feel sh*tty, I would just blame god, the world or something and feel sorry for myself.

I chose to stop being a victim to my thoughts and every single person who has posted on this thread has the power to do the same. The path to peace/serenity may be different, but with actions and a willingness to accept assistance life can be better. I heard a great saying "you cant heal a sick mind, with a sick mind". In many cases I imagine people are like me and they just lose hope and presume nothing they try will ever change their life.

Call Me Jimmy

In a sense Drumpot, would you say that your parents are right (probably not the best way to put it). CBT is a model for altering thinking processes, your parents said it's all in your mind. CBT agrees.

I'm not saying they weren't hurtful to you in the contexts in which they would say it, but, for you, isn't it all in the mind?

I hope that isn't offensive to you. For me, I realised everything I though about, negatively and positively, were me trying to distract myself from the pain. So when I used to think negatively about my parents, things they were doing wrong, things they didn't understand I finally asked myself why I am even bothered thinking about these? And I saw that I was avoiding thinking about myself or accepting my situation, how I was doing things wrong, or how bad it really felt. So often instead of thinking 'This is terrible, I feel so overwhelmed and frustrated' I would substitute in intersesting theories and fantasies about other people and their faults.