LETS ALL LAUGH AT PEOPLE WITH DEPRESSION!!

Esel

Kayleigh.. wrote: »

I know, I have a repeat prescription :P

What I meant was to ring and ask the receptionist to get it from the doctor and have it ready for collection.

Kayleigh..

Esel wrote: »

What I meant was to ring and ask the receptionist to get it from the doctor and have it ready for collection.

Ah yeah, I like going into the doctor to discuss it.

Calibos

Kayleigh.. wrote: »

Ah yeah, I like going into the doctor to discuss it.

At €50 a pop when you don't necessarily have to?

0byme75341jo28

Calibos wrote: »

At €50 a pop when you don't necessarily have to?

Your health is surely worth it?

Kayleigh..

€30, not €50.

The Strawman Argument

Just went to the doctor there and gave him a really thorough outline of everything. He was pretty great overall with everything he had to say, got prescribed Effexor at 75mg for the first month.

He wants me to go see a psychiatrist/counsellor too though, which I'm extremely skeptical about the benefits of. I talk quite openly and clearly about a lot of this stuff to a lot of people, it's simply not possible to explain the environment I come from without literally hours of exposition and I'm really quite done with it all. It's all stuff I feel pretty ready to move on from so I'm not sure if I'll bother.
If anyone wants to tell me about how either of those options have been for them, especially if they felt they had already processed all the stuff they were being asked to talk about, I'd appreciate you telling them.

looking_around

The Strawman Argument wrote: »

Just went to the doctor there and gave him a really thorough outline of everything. He was pretty great overall with everything he had to say, got prescribed Effexor at 75mg for the first month.

He wants me to go see a psychiatrist/counsellor too though, which I'm extremely skeptical about the benefits of. I talk quite openly and clearly about a lot of this stuff to a lot of people, it's simply not possible to explain the environment I come from without literally hours of exposition and I'm really quite done with it all. It's all stuff I feel pretty ready to move on from so I'm not sure if I'll bother.
If anyone wants to tell me about how either of those options have been for them, especially if they felt they had already processed all the stuff they were being asked to talk about, I'd appreciate you telling them.

psychiatrists deal with meds and will only talk to you enough to know your background/issues. Counsellour/therapy, doesn't necessarily mean talking about your past either. Can be talking about nowadays.
Like I talk about things bothering me at the present, sometimes linking in with past times, often not.
Outside of talk therapy there's cbt. Which is very useful at changing thought patterns.
It's up to you, therapies only work as much as the effort you put into them.

The Strawman Argument

Talking almost exclusively about the present seems like it could be a good idea! I've a tendency to drift off into exposition when "they're a hape of miserable c*nts" would suffice.

Think it was a psychologist rather than a psychiatrist btw, always mix them up.

Misty Moon

The thing I found great about seeing a counsellor was the fact that it was all about me. Sounds silly or selfish or whatever but I found it incredible to have a place where there didn't have to be any give and take. No matter how often I talked about things with friends or family I found counselling completely different. I didn't have any obligation at all to care about how he was or how his day/week/life was going. And the objectivity was also great - he had no stake in any of it. Another thing is that although I thought I had already talked everything to death before, talking to a counsellor actually brought out other things that I barely remembered and definitely never would have thought of as significant. I'd definitely recommend it, especially if you find someone who can incorporate some CBT into it.

Misty Moon

Oh, and if you want to spare yourself the hours of exposition you could always try summarising the main points in writing and giving that to them. I started back to therapy last year and was dreading having to go through weeks of just explaining my background again but the practice I'm going to now sent me a form to fill out. Was difficult enough to do but it meant that they already had all the pertinent details - family background, school, sexual history, work, traumatic experiences etc. - when I started. I wish I was still living in Ireland so that I could have gone back to my old counsellor but at least I didn't have to go over the same stuff again first.

Drumpot

The Strawman Argument wrote: »

Talking almost exclusively about the present seems like it could be a good idea! I've a tendency to drift off into exposition when "they're a hape of miserable c*nts" would suffice.

Think it was a psychologist rather than a psychiatrist btw, always mix them up.

Talking to people is good and somewhat therapeutic but to be honest most friends and family who either listen or try to help are well meaning, but they simply lack the tools to perhaps give you the support you NEED.

I used the example before about firefighters. If your house was on fire, would you phone friends or family or the fire brigade? A lot of people do not give their mental health the same sort of professional support.

Before I go on, I must stress I am speaking from experience, I am not judging or telling people how they feel. I know that I used to think that if I didn't have solution to how I felt that nobody else would. I thought that there was nothing that could "fix" me or help improve my life. If you look through this thread you will read a lot of my journey on it and will see the difference in how I write and my outlook on life has changed. I didn't start off in this thread positive about life!

I went from councellor to councellor, different medication to different medication and had numerous doctors, none of which I found could identify my problem.

looking back, to a large degree the biggest thing preventing me from getting well was myself. This is not to beat myself up with, but more awknowledge that I was so stuck inside myself, inside with my thoughts and beliefs, that I simply wasn't open minded about either outside help or alternatives. But I didn't know any better. Its clear reading many peoples posts on this thread that many people are stuck at that level.

One of the things that helped me greatly was when I eventually got to a stage where I felt I couldn't go on and I surrendered. I put my hands up and asked my doctor what I had to do and just took every bit of his advice without second guessing him.

You mentioned that your doctor spoke to you about councelling or psychiatrist. Not to sound too harsh, but do you really think that in your current mental health that you are in a position to understand whether or not it would benefit you ?

I ask you that because I know that I used to dismiss suggestions from professionals and family (meditation, therapy etc) without even trying them. In some cases I tried the suggestions but I wasn't really committed to it, I tried things just to say "well I did try and it failed".

I actually had to learn to commit to therapy and to give it the best chance of succeeding. Its not easy because I had really bad habits of giving things up if they failed or didn't give me instand results even once. I set high expectations ("I better feel better after this session or I wont go back!") and invariably I never really gave alternatives the proper attention they needed to succeed.

Somebody mentioned CBT which I have found great. Councelling is good for getting things off my chest. CBT was fantastic for me to learn with day to day things and put things into context. CBT gave me a new framework for living and I must quote my therapist when he said the reason I got so much success out of it was because I "would of worn a skirt and crawled around the floor on all fours" if my therapist had recommended it.

My life was simply unmanageable and was consistently absent of joy of any sort. I was dreading everything in the future and miserable about things from the past. I was reliving horrible things I couldn't let go (some of these things very trivial). I realised that the habits I learned growing up made life extremely difficult for me to live.

What I know now is that its important for me to work on how I feel inside more so then what is going on around me outside. I used to think if certain life ambitions were fulfilled (wife, children, house, pets, self employed etc), that my mood would improve. But the more I reached these targets the more I realised the problem was inside me.

For me Medication was not and is not a solution, its a crutch. I was on medication for decades and to be honest , on reflection, it was fixing nothing. It was only temporarily numbing the pain and even at that the side effects were in many cases awful/scary. I wasn't working on the problem and to be honest medication was a lazy way for me to not work on fixing how I felt.

I hope you don't find my comments harsh, but to be honest I F**ked around for decades looking for the solution to how I felt. Eventually when I learned to start learning about myself, with professional guidance, I started to see myself and my life in a completely different light. I made chances automatically in my life that I didn't even realise at the time were bringing me on a journey of peace and serenity in my life that I simply never could of imagined. .

When I held my hands up and accepted that I didn't know how to get well, I put my ENTIRE faith in my doctor and then subsequently my therapist and didn't question anything. I defaulted to their professional wisdom when I hit roadbumps and trusted that things would eventually improve instead of giving up and calling that strategy a failure. My faith was rewarded to a level I cant even express in words. If you relate to anything I said and are getting to that "I have nothing to lose" stage, then you should consider just doing the suggestions that your doctor has given you.

stop animal cruelty

^ great post, makes me more determinded to "fix" myself, you've given me hope drumpot

Drumpot

stop animal cruelty wrote: »

^ great post, makes me more determinded to "fix" myself, you've given me hope drumpot

Good for you. .

I remember that I started to gain great strength when I very simply started to take action (without anybody telling me to do it). .

One day I went to an Aware Group Meeting. Totally out of the blue I just got up and went to a meeting. I actually didn't really enjoy the meeting if I am honest because I was far more advanced at speaking about myself. Since I had been at counselling for years I was well able to speak about my feelings so the person running the meeting came up to me at the end of the meeting and told me about their "life skills" programme.

http://www.aware.ie/life-skills/

I decided to commit to the programme and made a promise to myself that even if I didn't like it or feel it would help, I would still goto all 6 classes. .

This was an absolute huge change in my thinking and was the first time I really started to take action to change my situation. I found it so easy to simply remain in horrible, lonely pain in my head because this was all I knew. It made me feel helpless and devoid of hope .

Actually physically doing something, anything, gave me a sense of liberation. Just doing something helped me get a small sense of hope that maybe I might actually be able to change how horrible I feel.

Exercise, meditation and all the other healthy tips are great, but for me I needed to work on my mind. I needed professional help to guide me on learning new ways to live. I see the physical exercises as ones that should compliment mental exercises. I don't see physical exercise as something that somebody suffering from depression or a mental illness should consider to be the most important aspect of recovery.

If you think about it logically, if you find it easy to do physical exercise and yet you still find yourself constantly struggling to enjoy life, then surely you should realise that more physical exercise is not the solution.

I have added spirituality to my therapy. I'm not looking to discuss the merits of a higher power (not necessarily the catholic vengeful god we all learned about), but I get a certain peace feeling like there's a higher being looking down like a parent. I regularly and randomly go into empty churches and sit down and let my mind run wild. I used to fight against my thoughts and tried to supress them. Now I give them the opportunity to speak to me and I get on so much better with myself

I used to get caught up on trying to understand things. If a professional would suggest "I want you to try this", I would want to understand it. Now I choose to believe what I am being guided on. It doesn't always work out, but by taking this approach I have much greater success at finding ways of improving my life.

Obviously a key thing is to trust your doctor/therapist. I know that I would of struggled to get as well as I have had I not found such good support. But I only found good support by actively looking for it. This is how it happened -

1. I came onto boards to share my feelings with others
2. somebody suggested Aware
3. I went to an Aware meeting
4. at that meeting I was told about "Life Skills"
5. After doing the Life Skills programme I decided to change doctors
6. I got a new great doctor who took me off all medication just so he could gauge where I was at. He also recommended a CBT therapist as he felt since I found Life Skills so good, that personal sessions would benefit me. he also said our goal was to have me off all meds.
7. Went to CBT one to one and have never looked back

This all started from me taking action. It was important for me to share my story with others and to learn how to talk, but it was only when I took action did my progress take off. I found it so easy to talk about solutions but in the end it was taking the big (and simple) step of action, did it begin a chain of events that have led me to where I am today.

I must stress that this journey has not been easy and has mostly been extremely painful and hard. There is a tendancy for people to think that this came easy to me and everything just fell into place one day. Apart from taking action, another important factor was perseverance. There were truly horrible moments of depression and feeling low, but I stuck with it...

I must also stress that I did this for me. It would be easy to say I did it for my children, wife or family, but I think it was vitally important for me to do it for myself. My self esteem and self worth was zero and doing this for myself has had ridiculous knock on positives for my family. It might sound selfish but paradoxically in this scenario doing it for myself has been the most selfless thing that I could do for my family.

Hope this helps and that you get well for yourself . I think we all deserve the right to enjoy being in our own company and its certainly the greatest gift that I have given to myself. .

The Strawman Argument

Thanks for the replies guys, I've got a few things jotted out I could probably do with talking about. Won't be able to get anything sorted for about a fortnight though. Money's a fairly big factor here really; I suspect the more I'm putting in, the more I'm going to be resistant to giving it a fair chance. Are there options which are significantly cheaper? Is biweekly possible instead of weekly?
I know I sound extremely cynical here, but I really do want to give it fair shot if I am going to give it a shot so I'm trying to get all that out in advance.


Got Venex XL (generic of Effexor) 75 mg for 28 days, was €19, cheap enough that I can handle an increase if it's needed anyways.

Misty Moon

The Strawman Argument wrote: »

Money's a fairly big factor here really; I suspect the more I'm putting in, the more I'm going to be resistant to giving it a fair chance. Are there options which are significantly cheaper? Is biweekly possible instead of weekly?

It's six years since I've lived in Ireland so others will have more up-to-date information for you no doubt. I'm not sure what the situation is with having therapy paid for by someone else, in my case I wasn't up to finding out about that at all and just paid for it myself (I did get a referral letter from my doctor though and was able to offset the amount I'd paid against taxes - this might have changed but check if that's a possibility, every little helps).

I was paying €70 per session when I started and it went up to €80, although as I was also struggling with debt my therapist very nicely never actually charged me the extra. Actually, having to make sure I had that money every week was part of what helped me get out of debt - I had no choice but to take control of my finances properly. Anyway, a couple of months after I started I had made so much progress that I started actually getting job offers from the interviews I was going on and I ended up switching to a new job but for less money. At that stage I switched to just going every two weeks and that wasn't an issue at all.

Would be interested to hear what other people's experiences have been in this regard, too.

looking_around

The Strawman Argument wrote: »

Thanks for the replies guys, I've got a few things jotted out I could probably do with talking about. Won't be able to get anything sorted for about a fortnight though. Money's a fairly big factor here really; I suspect the more I'm putting in, the more I'm going to be resistant to giving it a fair chance. Are there options which are significantly cheaper? Is biweekly possible instead of weekly?
I know I sound extremely cynical here, but I really do want to give it fair shot if I am going to give it a shot so I'm trying to get all that out in advance.


Got Venex XL (generic of Effexor) 75 mg for 28 days, was €19, cheap enough that I can handle an increase if it's needed anyways.

there are free therapy options if you go public, they aren't as far as I know, dependent on medical card. But do have a waiting list. However you can see a nurse while you wait. I would ask your doc about referring you to an outpatient facility/psychiatrist (you may never actually see the psych, but everything tends to go through them).

DeVore

Listen to Drumpot. He's basically killing it here.

Macavity.

I have found CBT a complete waste of time.

wexie

How many of these have you heard?

http://www.fromquarkstoquasars.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/123fa1d013f12d2125bd31f718325748.jpg

DeVore

Macavity. wrote: »

I have found CBT a complete waste of time.

Its a bit like all things, some of them work for some people, some of them don't. Not everything works for everyone.


I will say this... sitting in any kind of therapy isn't going to just magically fix people. The counsellor isn't going to be doing the heavy lifting, they just direct and suggest... they don't wave a magic wand and its somewhat like addiction therapy, its useless unless the subject *wants* to get better and to change!

guitarzero

DeVore wrote: »

Its a bit like all things, some of them work for some people, some of them don't. Not everything works for everyone.


I will say this... sitting in any kind of therapy isn't going to just magically fix people. The counsellor isn't going to be doing the heavy lifting, they just direct and suggest... they don't wave a magic wand and its somewhat like addiction therapy, its useless unless the subject *wants* to get better and to change!

I think the fact that someone is going to therapy suggests that they *want* to get better and change. It's implied by there attendance.

Esel

guitarzero wrote: »

I think the fact that someone is going to therapy suggests that they *want* to get better and change. It's implied by there attendance.

Attendance has to be by personal choice, not by the person wanting to comply with external (family / spouse / partner / friend) pressure.

It is like being back in school (as a child). If you repeatedly don't do the homework, the teacher will eventually write you off (as an adult) - or to paraphrase (for an adult), you will drop out.

Who loses? Only you, hopefully. However, there are usually many more losers.

looking_around

guitarzero wrote: »

I think the fact that someone is going to therapy suggests that they *want* to get better and change. It's implied by there attendance.

Not necessarily, I have attended counselling on and off for many many years. I have hone and "listened" and " talked" and "tried". I honestly believed i was trying, until 2 years ago.
When I said enough is enough and I want OUT. I wanted to actually change, more than I ever had, and I finally took advantage of the counselling and put more work into it than I thought possible.

One can think they want to change but aren't actually ready for it, and don't put in the effort needed.
They say things like "that's rediculous, that won't change anything, what difference does it make, i,m not telling myself that every morning, it won't help, I don't deserve to get better, nothing ever helps, i,ve always felt this way, what do they know? Learned from a book, it doesn't work that way" etc etc.

Now I'm not saying this was the case, cbt doesn't work for everyone, I was actually advised by my counsellor to do DBT, that cbt isn't really what I was needing.
Those phrases above, are things I've said myself, to excuse the lack of effort I put into the therapy, I wanted to feel like I was trying....but I wasn't.

LynnGrace

Excellent posts ^^ Drumpot.

Solobally8

Macavity. wrote: »

I have found CBT a complete waste of time.

That's a shame. I found CBT along with ACT has been a life saver. I have had every type of therapy over the years including CBT a few years ago but this combination has been fantastic for me. I've gone from not being able to leave the house to living a full and active life.

guitarzero

I've been feeling complete despair lately, no hope. I dont know what to do. I'm afraid of antiD's cuz of the side effects, cant believe how low i feel. Would love someone to talk to.

Solobally8

guitarzero wrote: »

I've been feeling complete despair lately, no hope. I dont know what to do. I'm afraid of antiD's cuz of the side effects, cant believe how low i feel. Would love someone to talk to.

I was worried about side effects too but I haven't experienced any this time. Tell someone how you're feeling and if that doesn't help, tell someone else! I was draining myself completely trying to hide how low I was. It was a relief in the end having it out there, not hiding any more. I suffer from depression and I am not ashamed to say it. Please talk to your GP. Depression is such an expensive illness but it's totally worth the investment if you find a good Dr and therapist.

looking_around

guitarzero wrote: »

I've been feeling complete despair lately, no hope. I dont know what to do. I'm afraid of antiD's cuz of the side effects, cant believe how low i feel. Would love someone to talk to.

Happy to chat.
----
Anti-ds have different side effects, they affect people differently.

I am very pro meds. Despite going through the trial and error with them. Once find one that works, it's amazing. Really makes life easier.
In saying that, for me, this is how it works.

Depression=a hole you're stuck in, no way to climb out.
Meds = a ladder, a helping hand.
You still gotta do the climbing though.

I have a friend who has been on meds about 5 years now, tried coming off twice and has pretty much accepted that they need them.
I'm off meds now, though I won't hesitate to start them if I start really struggling again.
There's nothing wrong with trying or needing meds.
Don't expect them to cure it either though, and it is frustrating trying to find the right med.

Side effects aren't always too bad. Many of them are just noticeable when starting or stopping the med.

Talk to your doctor, they will explain it all to you.

Message me if you'do like, I'm recovering from surgery right now and bored off my mind xd

Gleeso_Finglas

I didnt think that i would be this bad after my worst episode at the start of the year. I have reconized my triggers which seem to be physical triggers ie. After an operation or which has caused my latest and worst episode....Bing drinking.

i dont normally drink alcohol but myself and my fiance went away for a night and what started as a quiet pint led to mixing 8 different alcoholic drinks. I started drinking at 4 in the day and finished at 4am.... not like me at all. Well i spiralled from there and i ended up in connolly hospital for 2 weeks in which my meds were increased to get out of the hole. I got home last night and i had a good cry it has been a tough couple of months. I suffer with GAD and depression and although i am home i have no love or want to do anything. Im finding it hard leaving the house.

Im very emotional and feel like i am disconnected from the world. Ive done years of therapy and i am on very strong medication i have no financial worries and alot to look forward to but yet i feel dead inside like i have no access to any happy feelings.

Can anyone relate? Id love to talk to yous

looking_around

Gleeso_Finglas wrote: »

I didnt think that i would be this bad after my worst episode at the start of the year. I have reconized my triggers which seem to be physical triggers ie. After an operation or which has caused my latest and worst episode....Bing drinking.

i dont normally drink alcohol but myself and my fiance went away for a night and what started as a quiet pint led to mixing 8 different alcoholic drinks. I started drinking at 4 in the day and finished at 4am.... not like me at all. Well i spiralled from there and i ended up in connolly hospital for 2 weeks in which my meds were increased to get out of the hole. I got home last night and i had a good cry it has been a tough couple of months. I suffer with GAD and depression and although i am home i have no love or want to do anything. Im finding it hard leaving the house.

Im very emotional and feel like i am disconnected from the world. Ive done years of therapy and i am on very strong medication i have no financial worries and alot to look forward to but yet i feel dead inside like i have no access to any happy feelings.

Can anyone relate? Id love to talk to yous

I found that current situation may not really be a factor in my mood.
I struggle most when I fel life is utterly worthless, and do best when I put that out of my mind and work towards some goal
It's also shown that helping others/ animals can improve mood. Like volunteering somewhere or fostering. It certainly brings about a sense of worth and "doing good".