LETS ALL LAUGH AT PEOPLE WITH DEPRESSION!!

DeVore

I've been asked to spread this blog post.
https://emmaengineer.wordpress.com/2015/04/20/mental-health-my-story/

It broadly has the themes we have discussed here on many occasions.

silverfeather

I will read it more in depth when I have more time. There is a lot to take in there.

ThinkProgress

I don't see depression as a feeling of "nothingness".

I think it's a feeling of hopelessness and helplessness. But it can be a quiet desperation that goes on for many years - even decades!

Anybody or any thing can experience depression, it's a natural reaction when you perceive your situation as being out of your control.

Put a wild animal, like a wolf used to roaming free in the wild, into a small cage. For a while that wolf will remain "hopeful" and optimistic. But if enough time goes by - the wolf will lose hope and become depressed.

Humans by nature are more complicated. So we often create our own invisible cages within our own minds. Eventually our hope begins to fade too.

The solution to the wolf's problem is very simple. Our problems can be much more complicated - but they are essentially no different on that same basic level.

There are many things that can give you back that sense of control over your life. Some things are physical, others mental.

But you need to figure out what your cage is made out of first.

Personally, I think for many people it's their jobs. That's been my experience. I'd rather earn less money in a job I liked (or could better tolerate), than earn lots of money and be miserable every day!

But it can be other things too, like toxic relationships etc. I don't believe that anybody is naturally born depressed. Depression is a natural reaction to a problem - but it's not a natural permanent state of being.

Find out what your cage is!

I'm starting back in counselling on Saturday morning. Sounds like it'll be a weekly thing for me.

It has been so long since I've felt truly happy. Since I was 15 I've been apathetic and lethargic about life.

Wibbs

I hope the counselling gets you back to some sense of equilibrium and contentment K. Just going on my knowledge of you here, you of all people deserve that and the rest of us deserve to see that too.

Thanks Wibbs.

Had my first session yesterday. Was mostly information gathering and a bit of paperwork but I'm feeling really confident about it. Every Saturday for the next 6 weeks with the option of carrying on for longer.

They got me to sign a contract that I wouldn't commit suicide within the next 6 weeks! :eek:

Roquentin

Karsini wrote: »

I'm starting back in counselling on Saturday morning. Sounds like it'll be a weekly thing for me.

It has been so long since I've felt truly happy. Since I was 15 I've been apathetic and lethargic about life.

perhaps you are schizoid or schizotypal

Roquentin

Roquentin wrote: »

perhaps you are schizoid or schizotypal

There are some aspects of my personality that meet the criteria but Asperger syndrome and avoidant personality disorder also do too, maybe more so. So I can't say for sure, nor am I able to self-diagnose.

Roquentin

Karsini wrote: »

There are some aspects of my personality that meet the criteria but Asperger syndrome and avoidant personality disorder also do too. So I can't say for sure, nor am I able to self-diagnose.

they all would have similar traits but you cant be more than one.

the avoidant has low esteem. the schizoid/schizotypal doesnt but finds social interactions tiresome and draining and thus avoids them. the aspergers doest have poor self esteem but wants to be around people, but lacks the social skills (social dyslexia) or doesnt understand the mechanics of small talk.

Roquentin

Roquentin wrote: »

they all would have similar traits but you cant be more than one.

the avoidant has low esteem. the schizoid/schizotypal doesnt but finds social interactions tiresome and draining and thus avoids them. the aspergers doest have poor self esteem but wants to be around people, but lacks the social skills (social dyslexia) or doesnt understand the mechanics of small talk.

Cheers,

Not sure how much I can say without delving into self diagnosis or medical advice territory but I definitely have low self esteem and an extreme sensitivity to criticism (as per AvPD) but also the obsessive interests and social and sensory difficulties associated with Aspergers. So it's not an easy one, definitely not black and white anyway.

Feeling absolutely rotten today

Gremlinertia

Karsini wrote: »

Feeling absolutely rotten today

I hear ya.. Funny how a lot of people seem to equate good weather with better humour but it's not to be.. Just keep one breath after the next, this too will pass..

DeVore

Set your course.



I found this very helpful. It comes from... of all things... snowboarding. Yep, snowboarding. I'm a big snowboarder. Loved it until and accident broke my femur in half and I decided to become a wood turner instead

But as a snowboarder (bear with me, this is going somewhere) there is one thing you fear above all else and that's a patch of black ice. Its deadly. The board needs snow to carve into, to be able to turn. Black ice is the opposite of that... no grip whatsoever. Plus you cant see it coming.
It makes a sort of weird "growling" noise as the front of the board goes over it and that's your one and only signal... when you hear that growl, theres only one thing to do. Set your course.

The only way out of it is to ride through it. If you try to change direction or control the board, you are going on your arse and whats worse... you will land on hard ice, duh! The only way through, is through. You set your course and you ride through, no changes , no attempt to alter anything.

Its the same with a bad patch of mental health. You set your course and you ride through. Don't make any big decisions about your future, personal relationships, your career etc. Nothing, just set your course and ride through. Somes that's day at a time, sometimes that's hour at a time. And I don't mean passively, I mean actively question every decision and say "do I need to make this decision now, in the middle of a bad patch, or can it wait a few days".

Don't change direction in the middle of a bad patch, recognise you are in the middle of some black ice, set your course and ride through.

Big hugs and love your way... see you on the other side.

Went to my second counselling session today. Found it a bit difficult, was welling up and almost cried, but I think I'll be okay. Feeling confident about this.

Gremlinertia

Karsini wrote: »

Went to my second counselling session today. Found it a bit difficult, was welling up and almost cried, but I think I'll be okay. Feeling confident about this.

Well done, it's tough but sounds like you trust who you're talking to which doesn't always happen first time out for a lot of people.. It's tough work at times, stay brave, stay on the path.. Well done again.

greenfrogs

Karsini wrote: »

Went to my second counselling session today. Found it a bit difficult, was welling up and almost cried, but I think I'll be okay. Feeling confident about this.

I often cry at my counselling sessions. Don't be embarrassed or block your emotions at counselling. It's a safe place where you can discuss anything you want. I'm glad counselling is going well.

Hugo Stiglitz

Have been on the other thread for years. Just feel it's no harm to try here now too.

DeVore

We must fight these Other Threaders... REPEL THEM AT THE BORDERS!!!

*waves a conch in the air!*


(Hey, welcome to the gang Hugo)

Hugo Stiglitz

DeVore wrote: »

We must fight these Other Threaders... REPEL THEM AT THE BORDERS!!!

*waves a conch in the air!*


(Hey, welcome to the gang Hugo)

*Rallies the other Other Threaders* Man the cannons!


Thanks DV!

Gremlinertia

I'll man the watchtower and dispense tea!

scrimshanker

I'll just drink the tea. Thanks Gremlinertia!

Gremlinertia

Scrim, you have a deal!. I always have beverages and snacks for all our fellow "cuckoos" :pac:

StillThinking

Time for me to come clean with myself, I've not been doing the best of late. I didn't even realize till the other morning when I was in bed trying to get back to sleep that I hadn't had a shower in 5 days!!! This is always a warning for me that things are starting to go down hill but in the past after about the 3rd day I've copped on, not this time though.
Just wondering if anybody else doesn't notice that they are starting to spiral until it hits them that they haven't done a certain thing or are doing something different. After all these years suffering (official diagnosis at 17, 31 now) you would think I would see the warning signs from a mile away...

DeVore

I think I mentioned this in my OP... its sometimes very difficult for me to spot the (generally pretty obvious) signs... take an inventory of your day and your actions (and inactions). It has to be brutally honest and also forgiving of your shortcomings (not holding yourself to ridiculously high standards).
So, catalog a list of points and go through them... I do this and it helps me ensure that I'm not letting the little things slide (which stops them weighing on my mind and dragging me down). It sounds a bit OTT but I don't care. Do whatever you need to to fight this bugger.

Waestrel

A sometime mild sufferer of depression myself, I admire the frankness and bravery of all posting here. I have never been very bad, so I have no idea of the depths some of you must be suffering. All the best to all of you and stay strong.

Hugo Stiglitz

It makes me so anxious at times just trying to do the right thing by trying to work and get by in life. Sometimes I wish I just wasn't arsed.

dd972

Does anyone agree that a bad Tuesday is an absolute c**t as regards depression, there's a black earnestness about that day for some reason.

Hugo Stiglitz

dd972 wrote: »

Does anyone agree that a bad Tuesday is an absolute c**t as regards depression, there's a black earnestness about that day for some reason.

Tuesdays are the new Mondays it seems!

candycock

Tuesday's get me down but I'm coping,I'm seeing my councillor every Thursday an it's a great help,but I have to agree with Op Tuesday's leave a dark cloud over me.

Hugo Stiglitz

candycock wrote: »

Tuesday's get me down but I'm coping,I'm seeing my councillor every Thursday an it's a great help,but I have to agree with Op Tuesday's leave a dark cloud over me.

Am happy to hear that you're getting on great with the councillor CC!