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Overeating/Bullimic partner

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  • 21-12-2011 11:08pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Looking for some advice here(obviously).
    Don't know whether this suits here or Relationship issues.
    I figure those here maybe be able to offer some insight from the sufferer's point of view.

    Myself and my wife have now been married 8+ years.
    Previously she would have told me she had suffered bullimia.
    Haven't seen any sign of this though for 7 years.

    Several years ago, we had a child who died shortly after birth following some complications.
    We had about 3 weeks notice that the baby was terminal.

    We have since had another baby, and now have 3 kids alive.
    Following our last child, my wife took to drinking more.
    Not a huge amount, but more than normal, explained as cutting loose a bit after having abstained while pregnant. All perfectly reasonable and acceptable behaviour.

    However the drinking has increased (at least a bottle of wine 5+ nights a week), with some nights being 2-3+ bottles
    Also, worryingly, her eating has increased.
    Several times, at increasing rates, I've noticed sputum in the toilet in the morning.
    I've tried talking to her, but the subject of drink and food is immediately shot down.
    She doesn't want to talk about it, doesn't believe there is a problem and wants me to stop "monitoring" what she eats and drinks
    To the point where I'm worried about her, but am beginning to think there is an end to the relationship in sight if we cannot discuss this problem.

    I commented the other night on her finishing a large bags of crisp(large pack of doritos size) on her own.
    Stupidly/because she won't talk to me, assuming that she didn't realise she was eating so much, and this might lead her to be sick. Only to be told that this is not linked at all to bullimia. How am I to know? I've googled it, but haven't found much in terms of helping me understand the issues.

    Now however, I'm the bad guy, monitoring what she eats and drinks and she's starting to be paranoid about eating/drinking in front of me.

    To anyone that has suffered these issues, what can I do?
    Maybe I'm wrong that she's overeating and drinking too much.
    How can I best help her if I'm not wrong though.


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