How many single mothers IYO fit the stereotypical single mothers image?

HovaBaby

I hear people making overgeneralizations like "Not all 16 year old mothers are 16 year old sluts", etc. That there are single mothers who are well off but might have gotten divorced or their husband died.

But how many single mothers do you guys/gals reckon come from a disadvantanged background, have had a poor education and tended to sleep around a lot?

The King of Moo

HovaBaby wrote: »

I hear people making overgeneralizations like "Not all 16 year old mothers are 16 year old sluts", etc. That there are single mothers who are well off but might have gotten divorced or their husband died.

But how many single mothers do you guys/gals reckon come from a disadvantanged background, have had a poor education and tended to sleep around a lot?

Bit of a loaded question, perhaps?

If "Not all 16 year old mothers are 16 year old sluts" is an "overgeneralization," is "All 16 year old mothers are 16 year old sluts" not one too?

Anyway, none of the single mothers I know fit any stereotype.
I think you'll find the boring truth is that every person is different and there's a wide variety of women who are single mothers.

Saila

about 3 fiddy

Nodin

HovaBaby wrote: »

I hear people making overgeneralizations like "Not all 16 year old mothers are 16 year old sluts", etc. That there are single mothers who are well off but might have gotten divorced or their husband died.

But how many single mothers do you guys/gals reckon come from a disadvantanged background, have had a poor education and tended to sleep around a lot?

Whats your opinion?

44leto

The ones I know did not fit the above image, whether the above image is the general sterio typical image.

But there are some I see who do, the lady scumbags with their potential and present tearaways.

Cavehill Red

None.

But more than a few sadly fitted the other stereotypical image of single mums as vindictive bitter women who used their kids as weapons to get back at ex-partners.

Oranage2

I'm from a council estate so I'd know of a few young girls that popped out a baby now live off social welfare. I'd know one or two to talk to and they're really nice people.

HovaBaby

Nodin wrote: »

Whats your opinion?

I know about 6 single mothers and 5 of them have a tendency to be promiscuous. This is from what I see though. One is 24 and has 3 children from 2 different men and she still somehow manages to sleep around often. One of them appearently leaves her only child (one 6 month old baby) in the house and she goes out for a drink.

I knew a single mother from a course before, she was from a rough area and TBH I don't hold too much of a high opinion of her. She smokes about 40 fags a day and shouts and curses very often. One time outside the course center there was me, her and about 8 other students from the place. A fella walked down the road, shaved head and face full of scars and his body had many tattoos. The girl shouted out "Dat's the Father derre." Ya man didn't even look at her as he passed.

My sister goes into city hall sometimes because she is entitled to a house. She is encouraged by the people in city hall to have kids!! It would give her a much better chance at getting housing.

Khannie

I don't know many single mothers, but I married one. Apart from having a child, I'm struggling to think of any way she was significantly different from the non-mothers I went out with (except she is a legend and that's why I married her). She fit neatly into the "Got pregnant by accident and man responsible did a runner" category.

Khannie

HovaBaby wrote: »

One of them appearently leaves her only child (one 6 month old baby) in the house and she goes out for a drink.

You should report her if you think that's true tbh. I have read of similar neglect causing the death of a child.

ILikeBananas

HovaBaby wrote: »

But how many single mothers do you guys/gals reckon come from a disadvantanged background, have had a poor education and tended to sleep around a lot?

.

mikemac1

HovaBaby wrote: »

One of them appearently leaves her only child (one 6 month old baby) in the house and she goes out for a drink.

You should report it
Edit, the other posters beat me to it but I'll add a little bit

Last year there was a case of a mother going for drinks and leaving the infant unattended.
It's not a buggy but it's a seat like a buggy, I don't know the word is.

She came back later, bringing the barman home for more drinks, picked up a man for herself

The infant was checked but she left it here, didn't put the infant to bed and later on it has slid down in the seat, the neck was bent at an angle and suffocated.

Later examinations showed skin in a poor state and nappies were not being changed regularly at all so while that wasn't a factor in the death there was neglect going on

Just make a report, nobody wants to read about another of these cases

pragmatic1

The problem with any single mothers I know isnt the women themselves, its the grade A scum they had kids with. Mostly a result of being insecure and immature. Lost of social problems for this country down the road.

COYW

HovaBaby wrote: »

My sister goes into city hall sometimes because she is entitled to a house. She is encouraged by the people in city hall to have kids!! It would give her a much better chance at getting housing.

Having a child would leave her in a far stronger position in relation to getting house, without a shadow of a doubt. Her choice of housing and its location would also be far better.

From a council estate background myself and to be honest I have a very dim view of single mothers with multiple children. I know some people hate to hear this but it is a career option for plenty of girls in council estates. The percentage of girls who has children in their teens where I grew up was very high.

Batsy

Most single mothers in Britain only have a baby so that they can jump the housing queue and get about a dozen generous benefits.

I know there have been many people saying that, in order to reduce Britain's teenage pregnancy rate - which is the third highest in the world after the USA and New Zealand - all you have to to is stop providing single mothers with such benefits. Then, magically, less and less teenage girls will have babies.

Nodin

HovaBaby wrote: »

.............

My sister goes into city hall sometimes because she is entitled to a house. She is encouraged by the people in city hall to have kids!! It would give her a much better chance at getting housing.

Ye wha....?

Cavehill Red

Batsy wrote: »

Most single mothers in Britain only have a baby so that they can jump the housing queue and get about a dozen generous benefits.

You asked them all, I take it? Or is there some particular piece of research you're quoting that you can cite for us?

Latchy

Batsy wrote: »

Most single mothers in Britain only have a baby so that they can jump the housing queue and get about a dozen generous benefits.

Just as they are targeting other people ie , disability benefit claimants and as part of it's austerity measures, the British goverment plans to clamp down and reduce the amount of single mothers claiming for all sorts and not make it such an easy 'career' option but it would be totally unair to say most single mothers are just out for all they can get .

mattjack

HovaBaby wrote: »

I know about 6 single mothers and 5 of them have a tendency to be promiscuous. This is from what I see though. One is 24 and has 3 children from 2 different men and she still somehow manages to sleep around often. One of them appearently leaves her only child (one 6 month old baby) in the house and she goes out for a drink.

I knew a single mother from a course before, she was from a rough area and TBH I don't hold too much of a high opinion of her. She smokes about 40 fags a day and shouts and curses very often. One time outside the course center there was me, her and about 8 other students from the place. A fella walked down the road, shaved head and face full of scars and his body had many tattoos. The girl shouted out "Dat's the Father derre." Ya man didn't even look at her as he passed.

My sister goes into city hall sometimes because she is entitled to a house. She is encouraged by the people in city hall to have kids!! It would give her a much better chance at getting housing.

dont we all shout and curse.

Celly Smunt

The thing i don't get is why when a Teenage fella gets a girl pregnant he gets the shíte end of the blame,surely she opened her legs as quick as he stuck it in

The King of Moo

pmcmahon wrote: »

The thing i don't get is why when a Teenage fella gets a girl pregnant he gets the shíte end of the blame,surely she opened her legs as quick as he stuck it in

Going by After Hours at least, I think the mother gets a fair share of the blame!

Latchy

pmcmahon wrote: »

The thing i don't get is why when a Teenage fella gets a girl pregnant he gets the shíte end of the blame,surely she opened her legs as quick as he stuck it in

Condoms are pretty good at stopping unwanted pregnancys and if both partys are willing to take the risk without them then both should equally take the financial responsibiltys .

TheZohanS

An overweight, Nigerian-Irish unemployed single mother from a poor background walks into a bar...

skregs

TheZohan wrote: »

An overweight, Nigerian-Irish unemployed single mother from a poor background walks into a bar...

Deport her

jomc

I'd say of about 6 single mothers i know only one who makes it into the stereotype. She has two kids with two fathers but is still with the second one on and off. Drinks, smokes, has never had a job and tbh i think would never be capable of one. She just has this huge air of being unable to do anything. Luckily she gets a lot of help from family minding kids etc. She has a great house on rent allowance, bills paid, a car and doesn't seem to have any money troubles. But because of her inability to do much she wouldn't be out all the time but would constantly be drinking at home or having others over. When she doesn't have money for bills her family pick up the tab for her.

One single mother i know though completely defys the stereotype but is always being labelled as a slutty social welfare scrounger simply because she looks very young. She's late twenties and was engaged to the father when she found out he was cheating on her. The d!ck figured he could keep going because she wouldn't leave him as she was pregnant out of shame, she left anyway and built up her own life for herself, went to night college and moved in with her mother without ever receiving a penny from him. When she went to apply for housing and rent allowance she was told she isn't eligible because her daughter and her share a room in a house it was seen as fine then her benefit was cut off after someone (the ex's current girlfriend who is a total nutter) reported her for owning a boat to sw. She doesn't smoke, hardly ever drinks or goes out and her kid is one of the happiest well mannered children i've ever met. Her kids father died and sw suspended her one parent payment again because of it until they could get a death cert, which took ages for her to get because he died abroad and was french/german i think.

I find it amazing that someone like that gets so many knocks and blocks in their way of trying to move on with their life but someone like the first case who literally had a baby straight after school and spent the rest of their life on their backside doing nothing but drinking, smoking and pawning kids off on other people gets everything handed to her.

Latchy

TheZohan wrote: »

An overweight, Nigerian-Irish unemployed single mother from a poor background walks into a bar...

Get her to tell you a few ' dumbe blonde walked into a bar ' jokes .

The King of Moo

TheZohan wrote: »

An overweight, Nigerian-Irish unemployed single mother from a poor background walks into a bar...

...and gets a beer for free from the state which she feeds to her baby which is in the pram she got for free from the council after she left her old one at the bus stop because it wouldn't fit on the bus.

She then takes the barman's job but is also still unemployed.

Batsy

Cavehill Red wrote: »

You asked them all, I take it? Or is there some particular piece of research you're quoting that you can cite for us?

It's obvious to anybody who has half-a-brain. Again, as I said on another thread in relation to the banning of corporal punishment, giving single mothers automatic rights to housing and lavish benefits is another left wing policy which has been detrimental to our society, and our Tory government needs to sort it out.

Many organisations see it, too. The Family Education Trust says that Britain needs to adopt a model more like that in the Netherlands. It says that the British government should reduce the benefits that single mothers receive and also strengthen the family (i.e. make sure every child has a father, or a father-figure, in his or her life rather than just a mother). All this free housing and lavish benefits that British teenage and single mothers receive is nothing more than an incentive for them to get pregnant.

In the Netherlands, until recently, teenage mothers got NO welfare benefits at all. Now they receive them but they get a lot less than the over-generous amounts that British teenage mothers get. Unwed teenage parenthood is actually stigmatised in the Netherlands and is seen as wrong. Becoming a teenage mother is more likely to carry economic and social costs in the Netherlands than it is in Britain.

According to Robert Whelan, Director of the Family Education Trust:

Dr van Loon's research shows just how misconceived the Blair government's teenage pregnancy strategy really is. The government has committed itself to halving the teenage pregnancy rate by 2010, but seems to be pursuing policies which will have the opposite effect. Young people are encouraged to regard sexual relations from an early age as unobjectionable and desirable, as long as they use contraception. As teenagers are very inefficient users of birth control, this is a recipe for disaster. They need to be discouraged from engaging in high-risk behaviour, but the Teenage Pregnancy Unit will not take this on. Furthermore, the whole issue of the relationship between family structure and adolescent sexual activity is totally ignored by the TPU.

"We need to learn the lessons of the Netherlands. Benefits to teenage mothers should be reduced and made conditional on their living with their parents or in supervised hostel accommodation. Meanwhile, public policy should be urgently reviewed to see if there are ways in which the traditional family based on marriage can be shored up, rather than undermined as is the case at the moment.

http://www.famyouth.org.uk/press.php?pagename=DDUPR

It is now time to get rid of the left-wing policy of showering houses and benefits on teenage mothers and single mothers. All it is doing is creating an incentive for single, teenage girls to get pregnant. Remove those incentives and the rate of teenage pregnancy and the number of single mothers will go down. And that's what we need. Children should not be brought up with just a mother. Every child needs a father or, at least, a father figure in their lives. A huge percentage of those kids who end up in violent gangs and terrorising our streets come from single mother families and never had a father, or a father figure, in their lives.

Buceph

All of them: the godless hussies!

The King of Moo

Batsy wrote: »

It's obvious to anybody who has half-a-brain. Again, as I said on another thread in relation to the banning of corporal punishment, giving single mothers automatic rights to housing and lavish benefits is another left wing policy which has been detrimental to our society, and our Tory government needs to sort it out.

Many organisations see it, too. The Family Education Trust says that Britain needs to adopt a model more like that in the Netherlands. It says that the British government should reduce the benefits that single mothers receive and also strengthen the family (i.e. make sure every child has a father, or a father-figure, in his or her life rather than just a mother). All this free housing and lavish benefits that British teenage and single mothers receive is nothing more than an incentive for them to get pregnant.



It is now time to get rid of the left-wing policy of showering houses and benefits on teenage mothers and single mothers. All it is doing is creating an incentive for single, teenage girls to get pregnant. Remove those incentives and the rate of teenage pregnancy and the number of single mothers will go down. And that's what we need. Children should not be brought up with just a mother. Every child needs a father or, at least, a father figure in their lives. A huge percentage of those kids who end up in violent gangs and terrorising our streets come from single mother families and never had a father, or a father figure, in their lives.

Like Michael Phelps and Lance Armstrong.

Wasters.

And that Barack Obama fellow.

Never amounted to anything.

Cavehill Red

Batsy wrote: »

It's obvious to anybody who has half-a-brain.

Then show us lesser mortals the statistics you're citing.

Oh, and by the way, that Robert Whelan chap is a spoofer who doesn't have the doctorate he claims, and his organisation and he are a self-appointed religious thinktank which opposes sex education in schools.

Nodin

Batsy wrote: »

.................
Many organisations see it, too. The Family Education Trust says that Britain needs to adopt a model more like that in the Netherlands. .............

They preach abstinence rather than use of contraception....they're against legistlation that prevents discrimination against homosexuals...they're against gay marriage....Why not just link to a conservative church website and be done with it?

Nodin

Batsy wrote: »

It's obvious to anybody who has half-a-brain. .........

Maybe, but we full brained non-mail readers are having problems.

Halloran springs

Cavehill Red wrote: »

Then show us lesser mortals the statistics you're citing.

Just because statistics aren't collected for certain data (e.g. what % of single mothers are from blackrock, compared to ballyfermot - what % of single mothers smoke, what % of single mothers don't have a leaving cert, etc) doesn't mean it's not true - likewise it doesn't mean it's true either - but it would be pointless collecting this information for statistical purposes.

I think it's fairly obvious a higher % of single mothers are from disadvantaged areas, and have poorer levels of education. Yes that is not "PC" to say or whatever, but based on the collective experiences of probably the entire population it likely holds more true than not.

There will be the odd single mother here and there, who maybe has their leaving cert, even a degree, etc. and comes from dalkey - but they are the exception.

sophia25

Really depends on what is your opinion of the stereotypical view of lone parents. Is it that factually teenage single parents account for 1.7% of OPFA recipients? Is it that statistically they are more at risk of poverty because of the lack of affordable childcare? Or is that their children suffer the highest levels of poverty of any other age category in Ireland (2.5 times more than the over 75's)? Or is it easier to accept the negative image that allows you to keep a smug feeling of superiority than examine the actual facts that there are a generation of children forced to live in poverty because we allow absent parents to abscond from their responsibilities, unlike other countries where failure to provide adequately for your children has real consequences.

http://www.cpa.ie/povertyinireland/oneparentfamilies.htm
Social Welfare and Employment

In 2009, 90,484 people were in receipt of One Parent Family Payment (OPFP) from the Department of Social Protection. Of these, 56.1% were claiming for one child. Lone parents under 20 accounted for 1.7% of recipients. 97.88% of OPFP recipients were women.

60% of those receiving OPFP are in employment. Of these, most women work part-time, while most male lone parents work full-time. Lone parents often experience difficulty in accessing work, education and training opportunities because of a lack of good quality affordable childcare and after-school care. This means that job choices are often limited and low-paid.

http://www.treoir.ie/policy-statistics.php

EU Survey on Income and Living Conditions (SILC) data 2008
The Survey on Income and Living Conditions (SILC) in Ireland is a household survey covering a broad range of issues in relation to income and living conditions. It is the official source of data on household and individual income and also provides a number of key national poverty indicators such as the at risk of poverty rate and the consistent poverty rate.

The EU-SILC figures for 2008 show that one parent families continue to experience a disproportionate level of poverty. It is important to note that one parent families in the context of the EU-SILC data refers to parents who are divorced separated, widowed and parents who have never been married.

Risk of poverty
Lone parent households continued to be the household type with the highest at risk of poverty rate with a rate of 36.4% being recorded for individuals in these households.
This is despite the fact that persons living in lone parent households (+22.0%) along with households in which the head of household was unemployed (+25.2%) reporting the biggest increases in their income between 2007 and 2008.
While they represent just 6.1% of the population, people in lone parent households make up 17.5% of the people at risk of poverty.
Children remained the most at risk age group in 2008 with an at risk of poverty rate of 18%, a decrease of 1.9 percentage points from 2007.
Deprivation
Lone parent households reported the highest levels of deprivation with 55% of individuals from these households experiencing one or more items of deprivation compared with 25% at State level. Nearly one quarter (24.2%) of individuals in lone parent households experienced three or more of the forms of deprivation.
Lone parent households reported the highest rates for eight of eleven deprivation items. There was an increase in the inability of lone parents to afford a morning, afternoon or evening out in the last fortnight, rising from 16.8% in 2007 to 28.1% in 2008. Just over one fifth of people in lone parent households went without heating at some stage in the last year and 21.4% lived in a household that was unable to afford to have family or friends for a drink or meal once a month. Nearly one third of individuals in lone parent households lived in a household with the inability to replace worn out furniture (31.9%).
A higher proportion of children experienced enforced deprivation than other age groups. One in nine children (11.1%) experienced three or more deprivation items in 2008. This compares with a rate of 4.4% among those aged 75 or over.

Nodin

sophia25 wrote: »

Really depends on what is your opinion of the stereotypical view of lone parents. .....

That, having had sex, and - if having a Vagina as their main/only sexual organ - they are Wrong/Bad/Guilty etc.

Kimia

My mom was a single mother so apparently I should be in a gang, violently going about my business. I have a degree, I have travelled the world and I have a good job and am in a great relationship.

I really do wish that I had had a father who was present though. I used to be mad jealous of my 2 parent friends who had these seemingly perfect childhoods while mine was crap. I don't let it get the better of me but when I was younger and more naive I used to crave male approval, still do to a certain extent i suppose.

I probably shouldn't have said that on AH!

Scruffles

Latchy wrote: »

Just as they are targeting other people ie , disability benefit claimants and as part of it's austerity measures, the British goverment plans to clamp down and reduce the amount of single mothers claiming for all sorts and not make it such an easy 'career' option but it would be totally unfiar to say most single mothers are just out for all they can get .

agreed on all points here,though remembering roughly; disability benefits fraud is only supposed to be less than one percent of all claims-with the DWP actualy oweing far more DLA in underpayments ,whereas jobs seekers allowance and income support fraud is a lot higher.
-yep,have found a PDF on the exact amounts [from the department of work and pensions]:
http://campaigns.dwp.gov.uk/asd/asd2/fem/fem_apr08_mar09.pdf

have known a number of single mothers who are not the stereotypical and it is unfair that the contreversial stereotypes that get people ranting are usualy the ones used to represent the single mother.

and the stereotypical single mothers are usualy in that state because it is passed down to them from their family,it is seen as an ok way of life to have kids and never contribute to anything else,it is a learned mindset,like those who smack their kids because they were smacked is.
instead of using them as an easy target for rantage,they need to be helped to change their thinking,and shown that contributing to society is actualy a good thing for them,their family and everyone else-judging them harshly without knowing them or their background will make them avoid change when others cannot afford to make the slightest positive thought for them.

Already posted this on another thread, - there are a lot of myths about the stereotypical "single mother" but here are some facts:


Key facts about one-parent families in Ireland:

• 1 in 8 people in Ireland live in a one-parent family (Census 2006).
• 1 in 6 families in Ireland is a one-parent family (Census 2006.)
• Nearly half a million people live in one-parent families (Census 2006).
• The number of one-parent families increased by 35,350 since 2002 (Census 2006)
• The number of lone-parent families with children under 18 years of age increased by 41% between 2002 and 2006.
• 14 per cent of one-parent families are headed by a father (Census 2006).
• 1 in 5 children live in a one-parent family (Census 2006).
• 8% of one-parent families have a child with a disability compared to 5% of two-parent families
• There are 190,000 one-parent families in Ireland today – 18 per cent of all families (Census 2006).
• One-parent families are at greater risk of poverty than most other families. You are 4.5 times more likely to live in poverty if you live in a one-parent family (EU-SILC 2006).
• 10 per cent of one-parent families are living ‘with other persons’ (Census 2006).
• Overall in 2006, 36 per cent of lone parents were single, 30 per cent were separated or divorced and 29 per cent were widowed.

Key Facts about the One-Parent Family Payment:

• 84,364 people are currently receiving the One-Parent Family Payment (December 2007). This has increased from 59,000 in 1997.
• 76.7% of current recipients are unmarried; 11.7% separated; 7.6% divorced; 3% deserted
• 98% of recipients are women
• 60% of those receiving the OPFP are in employment
• 58% of recipients have one child; 27% have two children; 10% have three children
• The percentage of OPFP recipients under 30 years of age is falling (41.6%)
• The percentage of OPFP recipients over 30 is increasing (currently 58.4%)
• The number of teenage mothers fell from 4.4% in 1997 to 2.2% in 2007
• 29, 600 OPFP recipients (35%) are on reduced personal rate due to income- vast majority down to earnings

Note the age profile - the majority of "single mothers" are over 30 and have more than one child.

Another stereotype is that "single mothers" are mostly young girls with one child - but this is simply untrue. They also include include married but seperated or divorced, and (for Social Welfare purposes) - widows under the age of 66.

Also note that less then 50% of all "one parent family's" were claiming a SW payment at the last census, and of those that were in receipt of a SW payment - 60% were in some kind of employment.

.

Scanlas The 2nd

Kimia wrote: »

My mom was a single mother so apparently I should be in a gang, violently going about my business. I have a degree, I have travelled the world and I have a good job and am in a great relationship.

I really do wish that I had had a father who was present though. I used to be mad jealous of my 2 parent friends who had these seemingly perfect childhoods while mine was crap. I don't let it get the better of me but when I was younger and more naive I used to crave male approval, still do to a certain extent i suppose.

I probably shouldn't have said that on AH!

I'm male and you have my approval. Problem solved. No more need for male approval.

Kimia

Scanlas The 2nd wrote: »

I'm male and you have my approval. Problem solved. No more need for male approval.

My life is complete! :pac:

Steelpony

Yeah, I know a family with 3 teenage girls, they all have 2 children. It was a career choice for them. They will never have to work, and all have apartments. When they have more children they will get a house. It's a no brainer.

Latchy

There are good single mothers ,bad single mothers and absolute horrendous ones and are more kids now than ever growing up were both parents are absent and children grow up left unsupervised in the home .

Latchy

Latchy wrote: »

... more kids now than ever growing up were both parents are absent and children grow up left unsupervised in the home .

But our Government approves of this - shown by their intention to withdraw eligibility for One Parent Family Payment once children are just seven years old.
.

Latchy

Deleted User wrote: »

But our Government approves of this! Shown by their intention to withdraw eligibility for One Parent Family Payment once children are just seven years old.

Yes but there is also the plain fact that some parents are absent from the home for hrs on end, every day, by choice just so as to avoid responsibility .

HovaBaby

Kimia wrote: »

My mom was a single mother so apparently I should be in a gang, violently going about my business. I have a degree, I have travelled the world and I have a good job and am in a great relationship.

I really do wish that I had had a father who was present though. I used to be mad jealous of my 2 parent friends who had these seemingly perfect childhoods while mine was crap. I don't let it get the better of me but when I was younger and more naive I used to crave male approval, still do to a certain extent i suppose.

I probably shouldn't have said that on AH!

I was raised with my sister by my Dad. (My Mother passed away when I was 3.) I think there isn't the same stigma with single Dad's as there is with single Mother's. Back then though (early 90's) the benefits weren't nearly good as enough as these days.

(I'm not in a gang or anything BTW too )

Millicent

Steelpony wrote: »

Yeah, I know a family with 3 teenage girls, they all have 2 children. It was a career choice for them. They will never have to work, and all have apartments. When they have more children they will get a house. It's a no brainer.

I don't get why people get so judge-y about girls like this, though. I, personally, think it's sad that there are young women who think their only chance at a better life or their own potential is to have a child and claim benefits. I wouldn't wish the stress of an existence on the breadline on any parent or child.

*Note, I don't think this is the majority or even a sizeable minority of single mothers. Just the rarer cases.

Batsy

Batsy wrote: »

Children should not be brought up with just a mother. Every child needs a father or, at least, a father figure in their lives.

This is all very well in theory. But this is not always within the control of the mother.

I was one of those "single mothers" who did everything that I possibly could to encourage the Father of my child to be involved with his daughter (not necessarily with me, just her - I would have been fine with that) but the man concerned just was not interested in having any kind of relationship with, or being any part, of his daughter's life.

And whats more, he has never been made in any way accountable for the role he played in my "single" parenthood.

(For the record, I'm 42, one child, (nearly 16), I own my own home and have been in employment since the day I left school when I was 17. And there are many more like me.

minidazzler

In just my sisters class, a 5th year, there are 3 babies with babies. The year below her have 2 and the year above have like 5 or 6 I can't remember. All but 1 really fit the stereotype I'd guess.

That's not counting the ones that are known to be pregnant either. Because I don't know when they will pop.

minidazzler

minidazzler wrote: »

In just my sisters class, a 5th year, there are 3 babies with babies. The year below her have 2 and the year above have like 5 or 6 I can't remember. All but 1 really fit the stereotype I'd guess.
.

And are the Fathers of these children also in the same classes?

They're less easy to identify though - no pregnancy bump or buggy.

pragmatic1

Millicent wrote: »

I don't get why people get so judge-y about girls like this, though. I, personally, think it's sad that there are young women who think their only chance at a better life or their own potential is to have a child and claim benefits. I wouldn't wish the stress of an existence on the breadline on any parent or child.

*Note, I don't think this is the majority or even a sizeable minority of single mothers. Just the rarer cases.

People get judgey because its a burden on the rest of society both financially and socially. Its a different story when a single parent gets in the situation through no fault of their own or where they support themselves.