The Newborn & Toddlers Off-Topic Chat Thread

The_Conductor

January wrote: »

Sorry The_Conductor, I've edited out the name in your post. Some people are fussy about their workplace, profession and name being broadcast on the internet.

No worries- sorry!

Emmadilema123

The bug is almost gone in the house. Hubby is better and 3 yr old is currently chomping a croissant and is no longer green. Mammy still a bit wonky but better. Baba seems to be the only one who escaped it! What a rotten week! Wedding in Galway on Saturday will be enough to lift my spirits though :-D

IvyTheTerrible

L had an extra long sleep last night, when we went to get him when he woke up, we discovered he had a big nosebleed during the night. I hope it was just that he banged his nose off the cot bars and nothing more serious.

bean14

my little 12 week old isobel is out growing her clothes. lots are worth keeping but space is an issue. whats everyone else doing? we have a well insulated attic. no issues when christmas tree or college notes come down. i was thinking of getting some of the vacumn storage bags from argos that i would hoover out all the air from to store the clothes in. would anyone have any experience of this please?

IvyTheTerrible

bean14 wrote: »

my little 12 week old isobel is out growing her clothes. lots are worth keeping but space is an issue. whats everyone else doing? we have a well insulated attic. no issues when christmas tree or college notes come down. i was thinking of getting some of the vacumn storage bags from argos that i would hoover out all the air from to store the clothes in. would anyone have any experience of this please?

I use those vaccuum bags for L's old clothes (we'll either use them again if we have another baby or pass them on to family), I find them great. Here's a tip though, label the bags with what's in them, if you're looking for something it's a pain to have to open them all!

Cunning Stunt

Yeah the attic should be fine if you are using vacuum storage bags.

4 month sleep regression has just hit here! We're lucky to get him to nap more than 20 mins in the daytime, and he's waking earlier at night. I hope to God it doesn't last long!

Synyster Shadow

Oh the 4 month mark is not a happy time at all. I know for my little lad he was in it for 5 weeks now he's 12 months and so happy but number 2 will be here soon to disrupt all again.

Emmadilema123

IvyTheTerrible wrote: »

L had an extra long sleep last night, when we went to get him when he woke up, we discovered he had a big nosebleed during the night. I hope it was just that he banged his nose off the cot bars and nothing more serious.

Aw poor little guy. My little man was constantly banging himself off bars. Literally tumbles all over in his sleep. Ended up putting him in the travel cot and now he has a double bed so he has room for his sleep time acrobatics. It's actually unbelievable how much he moves in his sleep.

January

IvyTheTerrible wrote: »

L had an extra long sleep last night, when we went to get him when he woke up, we discovered he had a big nosebleed during the night. I hope it was just that he banged his nose off the cot bars and nothing more serious.

Mine usually have nosebleeds if they are getting over a cold. Hopefully he's ok. We had the same here this morning, my 4 year old fell and whacked her nose off the stair gate... I thought we were going to have to call an ambulance the amount of blood and it only started stemming after half an hour.

IvyTheTerrible

January wrote: »

Mine usually have nosebleeds if they are getting over a cold. Hopefully he's ok. We had the same here this morning, my 4 year old fell and whacked her nose off the stair gate... I thought we were going to have to call an ambulance the amount of blood and it only started stemming after half an hour.

Yeah he's at the tail-end of the semi-permanent cold he's had since Christmas! It's scary just to see a big blood stain like that!
I hope your little one is ok now!

Xdancer

I think I'd have heart failure if I found blood in the cot in the morning! :O I hope L is ok.

My LO is nearly 2 yrs 4 months and still loves her cot, should I just hold off moving her to a bed until she wants to? There's no harm leaving her in the cot I presume?

Suucee

bean14 wrote: »

my little 12 week old isobel is out growing her clothes. lots are worth keeping but space is an issue. whats everyone else doing? we have a well insulated attic. no issues when christmas tree or college notes come down. i was thinking of getting some of the vacumn storage bags from argos that i would hoover out all the air from to store the clothes in. would anyone have any experience of this please?

vacuum bags work fine. But deffinetly label the stuff (newborn, 0-3, 3-6 month etc) another tip would be to maybe put neutral stuff like white babygros or vests seperate. I labelled the bags but just through everything in. Had a girl first time and a boy second time so had to go through all the bags to take out the neutral things i could use again.

red fraggle

uote="Xdancer;89759279"]I think I'd have heart failure if I found blood in the cot in the morning! :O I hope L is ok.

My LO is nearly 2 yrs 4 months and still loves her cot, should I just hold off moving her to a bed until she wants to? There's no harm leaving her in the cot I presume?[/quote]

My 2 year old and 2 months still loves her cot so not moving her any time soon!

O the 4 month sleep regression, my Little man is stil waking most of the night 4 weeks in!!! Hopin he settles soon! Also has wind problems contributing.

Cunning Stunt

My God, this 4 month sleep regression thing is no joke! He roared for ages at bedtime last night even though he was ueber-tired. When he gets worked up like that he gets so warm - you can nearly see steam coming off of him. We finally got him alseep lying down in his cot with some bottle and as we expected he woke up earlier than usual in the early hours. I can't wait until this phase is over!

red fraggle

Cunning Stunt wrote: »

My God, this 4 month sleep regression thing is no joke! He roared for ages at bedtime last night even though he was ueber-tired. When he gets worked up like that he gets so warm - you can nearly see steam coming off of him. We finally got him alseep lying down in his cot! with some bottle and as we expected he woke up earlier than usual in the early hours. I can't wait until this phase is over!

I know exactly how you feel!! Only j settles fine then 2 or 3 hours later he is off for the night!!! Exhausted is not the word. Going on 4 weeks now. Hope it ends soon! Hope yours doesn't last as long!

bean14

thanks a million for the advice on labelling the vacum bags

loubian

I love a productive day of making dinner for herself for a week!

dublinlady

She's almost 11 months... Can I give up sterilising...? I'm soooo bored of it! 2 years solid! I want my kitchen counter back!!!

Xdancer

dublinlady wrote: »

She's almost 11 months... Can I give up sterilising...? I'm soooo bored of it! 2 years solid! I want my kitchen counter back!!!

If I were in your position I probably would. You'd be stopping in about a month anyway.....

The_Conductor

dublinlady wrote: »

She's almost 11 months... Can I give up sterilising...? I'm soooo bored of it! 2 years solid! I want my kitchen counter back!!!

Make a little ceremony of dumping the steriliser in the bin- and hope you don't have to buy another one before too long!

Chattastrophe!

dublinlady wrote: »

She's almost 11 months... Can I give up sterilising...? I'm soooo bored of it! 2 years solid! I want my kitchen counter back!!!

My own feeling is that we'll probably give it up once he starts crawling ... sure no matter how clean you keep the floors, he'll be exposed to plenty of germs anyways, and of course they're putting just about anything into their mouths by then.

I think I'd probably cut back to sterilising once every couple of days, then once a week, at first, rather than cutting it out altogether immediately. Is that how it's usually done? I have no idea!

He's only three months old and already I can't wait to get rid of it. Don't know how you managed two years of it!

January

On the first I sterilised until she was 12 months. Two months later I took it up again for 8 months, she was licking the wheels off the buggy by then so gave it up, same with the third.

How Strange

I stopped sterilising everything months ago. Once I saw her licking the floor I decided sterilising soothers was probably a bit pointless.

dublinlady

Right thanks ladies! Decision made! I'm jacking it in! Today as the steriliser was on and the two girls were happy playing I decided to pot on some little seeds I had been growing - it was a messy affair , S has only started crawling in the last week so I didn't expect her to be under my feet - sure I looked down and she had a mouth full of soil - at that point the steriliser beeped and i wondered to myself really had I lost the plot!!
I certainly will be happy to keep it turned off Tom and won't know what to do with the space!! The only reason we sterilised with A for the full 12 months plus was that I was due so soon after with A it made no sense to put it away whereas now it's goodbye and good riddance!!! Thanks for the pep talk I feel less guilty now!

Wooha

dublinlady wrote: »

She's almost 11 months... Can I give up sterilising...? I'm soooo bored of it! 2 years solid! I want my kitchen counter back!!!

My sister is in Austria. She was advised to sterilise for 6 months. In Germany the advice is 8 months...
Every country seems to have their own rules...

The_Conductor

dublinlady wrote: »

Right thanks ladies! Decision made! I'm jacking it in! Today as the steriliser was on and the two girls were happy playing I decided to pot on some little seeds I had been growing - it was a messy affair , S has only started crawling in the last week so I didn't expect her to be under my feet - sure I looked down and she had a mouth full of soil - at that point the steriliser beeped and i wondered to myself really had I lost the plot!!
I certainly will be happy to keep it turned off Tom and won't know what to do with the space!! The only reason we sterilised with A for the full 12 months plus was that I was due so soon after with A it made no sense to put it away whereas now it's goodbye and good riddance!!! Thanks for the pep talk I feel less guilty now!

If its any consolation- we used culture soil samples in microbiology to see what they contained. The amount of beneficial fungus and bacteria was remarkable- the average person had significantly worse results from swabs taken from their 'clean' hands than from the soil samples.

(Once upon a time you could take microbiology as a double elective in UCD, providing you were doing a major science, ag or engineering degree)

Nead21

I'm going to stop sterilising too. Little man is almost 1 and I've started changing him onto normal milk for his bottles. Sorry for asking a stupid question now but do you just wash the bottles as normal?

January

Nead21 wrote: »

I'm going to stop sterilising too. Little man is almost 1 and I've started changing him onto normal milk for his bottles. Sorry for asking a stupid question now but do you just wash the bottles as normal?

Yep just wash as normal in hot soapy water or even throw them through a dishwasher cycle if you have a dishwasher.

Nead21

Great thanks January. It's another thing we won't have to do. I agree that once he started moving around it was pretty pointless unless I was going to follow him around all day washing his hands! Yesterday he was sitting in the shopping trolley and he was licking the handle :rolleyes:

Now is 1 too early to toilet train....:P

IvyTheTerrible

Nead21 wrote: »

Great thanks January. It's another thing we won't have to do. I agree that once he started moving around it was pretty pointless unless I was going to follow him around all day washing his hands! Yesterday he was sitting in the shopping trolley and he was licking the handle :rolleyes:

Now is 1 too early to toilet train....:P

L used to love sucking the thing that you stick into the other trolley to get the coin out! Bleurgh!
He likes to taste everything.
But he's 2 now and never had a tummy upset so I try not to stress about it!

Nead21

Yeah he was doing that too...yuck! When he doubt put it in your mouth seems to be his motto ha

The_Conductor

January wrote: »

Yep just wash as normal in hot soapy water or even throw them through a dishwasher cycle if you have a dishwasher.

If you have fussy kids who like the pictures on their bottles (e.g. the Nuk bottles have little animals dancing on them- some have butterflies etc)- note that putting them on a dishwasher cycle wears out the picture in no time flat.

minusthebear

Is it just me or is a 4 week old baby too young to be carted around in the car to relations/shops etc etc. Just seems very fragile to me at that age to be out and about like a fashion accessory.

Sligo1

minusthebear wrote: »

Is it just me or is a 4 week old baby too young to be carted around in the car to relations/shops etc etc. Just seems very fragile to me at that age to be out and about like a fashion accessory.

Perhaps the parents need to get out too? They've probably been couped up in doors and have a dose of cabin fever? Staying inside all day would drive anybody nutty or contribute to mummy getting some bad baby blues.

Chattastrophe!

minusthebear wrote: »

Is it just me or is a 4 week old baby too young to be carted around in the car to relations/shops etc etc. Just seems very fragile to me at that age to be out and about like a fashion accessory.

I brought my baby bra-shopping with me in M&S Blanchardstown shopping centre the day we left hospital, when he was 3/4 days old! It wasn't using him as a fashion accessory, it was just something that had to be done, and it's not like I could have left him at home, as I was breastfeeding at the time. It didn't do him any harm!

There is quite a judgemental tone to your post.

Xdancer

minusthebear wrote: »

Is it just me or is a 4 week old baby too young to be carted around in the car to relations/shops etc etc. Just seems very fragile to me at that age to be out and about like a fashion accessory.

That's very judgemental. Not everyone wants to be cooped up at home just because they have a baby. The fresh air does everyone good, and baby is usually well coocooned in they're pram etc.
Life doesn't stop just because you have a baby. Things still have to be done.

minusthebear

Sligo1 wrote: »

Perhaps the parents need to get out too? They've probably been couped up in doors and have a dose of cabin fever? Staying inside all day would drive anybody nutty or contribute to mummy getting some bad baby blues.

Oh I do agree it's great to get them both out of for some fresh air. (I'm the dad) however I think little walks around the locaility should be sufficient. I'm uncomfortable with car journeys & 3/4 hours at a time away from home. Just seems to me to be very young for that. Maybe I am being over protective?, which is why I posted the question.

Chattastrophe! wrote: »

I brought my baby bra-shopping with me in M&S Blanchardstown shopping centre the day we left hospital, when he was 3/4 days old! It wasn't using him as a fashion accessory, it was just something that had to be done, and it's not like I could have left him at home, as I was breastfeeding at the time. It didn't do him any harm!

There is quite a judgemental tone to your post.

I don't see anything judgmental in my post. The situation you describe seems perfectly reasonable, a necessary journey, I suppose I'm talking about "leisure" journeys! I'd rather be home and snugged up I suppose but that's me. I'll get over it over time I'd imagine

January

minusthebear wrote: »

Is it just me or is a 4 week old baby too young to be carted around in the car to relations/shops etc etc. Just seems very fragile to me at that age to be out and about like a fashion accessory.

Um no... babies need fresh air too you know... You can't hibernate just because you have a baby... Life goes on. Especially if you have other kids that need to be carted around too.

Do you have kids yourself? Sitting in the house all day with a baby would drive you batty.

Chattastrophe!

minusthebear wrote: »

Oh I do agree it's great to get them both out of for some fresh air. (I'm the dad) however I think little walks around the locaility should be sufficient. I'm uncomfortable with car journeys & 3/4 hours at a time away from home. Just seems to me to be very young for that. Maybe I am being over protective?, which is why I posted the question.



I don't see anything judgmental in my post. The situation you describe seems perfectly reasonable, a necessary journey, I suppose I'm talking about "leisure" journeys! I'd rather be home and snugged up I suppose but that's me. I'll get over it over time I'd imagine

I'm the absolute definition of an over-anxious over-protective first mother, and even I think you're being really unfair!

Car journeys? There are risks, but sure the same risks exist as they're growing up. Just make sure they're well protected with the correct well-fitted carseat. Don't avoid them altogether!

3/4 hours away from home? I'm sorry, but your small baby doesn't yet know what "home" is. Have bottles/boobs, soothers, nappies etc ready. The baby honestly doesn't know the difference between home and elsewhere at this stage, so long as their needs are met.

You can't imagine how isolating these early weeks/months are for your wife, and how difficult it is to suddenly have this new demanding 24/7 attachment. If I were you, I'd be encouraging her to get out as much as possible and meet as many people as possible, keeping it within the thresholds she's comfortable with.

Don't try to define those thresholds for her.

January

I think you need to relax a little bit, 3/4 hours out and about with a baby is not long at all and car journeys are part of life.

January

Also, I'm going to add that I hope your partner never sees this and cops on you're talking about her... if my partner ever thought I was using my baby as a 'fashion accessory' and complaining about it on line, I'd flip out.

minusthebear

Chattastrophe! wrote: »

I'm the absolute definition of an over-anxious over-protective first mother, and even I think you're being really unfair!

Car journeys? There are risks, but sure the same risks exist as they're growing up. Just make sure they're well protected with the correct well-fitted carseat. Don't avoid them altogether!

3/4 hours away from home? I'm sorry, but your small baby doesn't yet know what "home" is. Have bottles/boobs, soothers, nappies etc ready. The baby honestly doesn't know the difference between home and elsewhere at this stage, so long as their needs are met.

You can't imagine how isolating these early weeks/months are for your wife, and how difficult it is to suddenly have this new demanding 24/7 attachment. If I were you, I'd be encouraging her to get out as much as possible and meet as many people as possible, keeping it within the thresholds she's comfortable with.

Don't try to define those thresholds for her.

That's a helpful post, thanks. Your point about the baby and home is a good one, which I didn't consider. We haven't not done any of these journeys but we were discussing over the weekend my discomfort with them so I was wondering myself were my feelings normal.

Moonbeam

minusthebear wrote: »

Is it just me or is a 4 week old baby too young to be carted around in the car to relations/shops etc etc. Just seems very fragile to me at that age to be out and about like a fashion accessory.

At 4 weeks old,I would expect life to be going on as normal as possible.
Shopping needs to be done, relatives need to be visited,life needs to go on.
Unless the child is a sick baby there is no reason that they should not be out and about.
I can't imagine why anyone would sit at home with a 4 week old baby when they don't want to be unless they were depressed or baby was sick.

dori_dormer

i make sure i get outside with the baby every day. Be that a walk in the park, or a trip to the local shops, or visiting friends. I think I would go stir crazy otherwise and its not healthy for anyone to be cooped up inside all day. Also I think it good to get into different situations so that things with the baby dont become 'scary'. Like driving with the baby on my own. Or navigating a shopping centre, figuring out where the lifts/changing rooms are. Or getting on the bus for the first time etc.
I do find it tedious having to visit family every weekend, ours is the first grandchild on both sides so everyone wants us to visit EVERY weekend. weve decided we will visit each side every other weekend and if they want to see him on their weekend off they are more than welcome to visit us for an hour or so. we cant be spending every minute off in other peoples homes, we need time together as a family.
Our little guy is 8 weeks old and every thing is getting easier by the week. Also I think its good for the baby to get used to the car. I know a few that just scream their heads off the whole time because they arent in it often, makes those 'necessary' journeys hell and makes you avoid them even more!

Suucee

I have an 8 day old and was out and about when he was 2 days old. Since he was born theres only been 1 day i didny get out of the house.. mainly due to bad weather and i thought id go batty. I was giving out that i hadnt put shoes on all day.
I also have a 23 month old. If we didnt get out she would get board 2.
Even my phn recommended getting out for fresh air or adult company . Its whats best for mammy 2.

January

dori_dormer wrote: »

i make sure i get outside with the baby every day. Be that a walk in the park, or a trip to the local shops, or visiting friends. I think I would go stir crazy otherwise and its not healthy for anyone to be cooped up inside all day. Also I think it good to get into different situations so that things with the baby dont become 'scary'. Like driving with the baby on my own. Or navigating a shopping centre, figuring out where the lifts/changing rooms are. Or getting on the bus for the first time etc.
I do find it tedious having to visit family every weekend, ours is the first grandchild on both sides so everyone wants us to visit EVERY weekend. weve decided we will visit each side every other weekend and if they want to see him on their weekend off they are more than welcome to visit us for an hour or so. we cant be spending every minute off in other peoples homes, we need time together as a family.
Our little guy is 8 weeks old and every thing is getting easier by the week. Also I think its good for the baby to get used to the car. I know a few that just scream their heads off the whole time because they arent in it often, makes those 'necessary' journeys hell and makes you avoid them even more!

My first screamed when the car was moving, doesn't matter where we were going and she would have been in it nearly every day since the day she was born. She hated it, stopped crying when the car stopped even if it was for a few seconds.

The other two screamed when the car stopped and loved when it was moving...

dori_dormer

January wrote: »

My first screamed when the car was moving, doesn't matter where we were going and she would have been in it nearly every day since the day she was born. She hated it, stopped crying when the car stopped even if it was for a few seconds.

The other two screamed when the car stopped and loved when it was moving...

LOL you cant win can you?!

Julo12

minusthebear wrote: »

That's a helpful post, thanks. Your point about the baby and home is a good one, which I didn't consider. We haven't not done any of these journeys but we were discussing over the weekend my discomfort with them so I was wondering myself were my feelings normal.

To be fair my oh had similar concerns when our first was small- he didn't really want me going visiting everyone under the sun and passing her round or wandering around shopping centres every day etc. But when it came to wkends he realised how crazy he'd go sitting looking at 4 walls just for those 2 days! Also we were happy to go visiting and have someone else hand us a cup of tea, hold the baby and maybe even chat about non baby affairs! I didn't think myself I'd go to a shopping centre with a newborn baby but when it's lashing rain, ur going stir crazy and baby won't sleep there's a lot to be said for under cover parking and a place to amble while baby hopefully sleeps lulled by the buzz of activity! So while I think u may not be alone in thinking it a little ott to do 'too much' with a newborn it really can be the best and necessary thing to do in getting out there with them

Neyite

minusthebear wrote: »

Is it just me or is a 4 week old baby too young to be carted around in the car to relations/shops etc etc. Just seems very fragile to me at that age to be out and about like a fashion accessory.

minusthebear wrote: »

That's a helpful post, thanks. Your point about the baby and home is a good one, which I didn't consider. We haven't not done any of these journeys but we were discussing over the weekend my discomfort with them so I was wondering myself were my feelings normal.

My partner was a bit protective that way when we had our baby - I'd try to do a gentle walk to the shops to get small groceries but he would insist on getting them on his way home from work. I needed to get out. I was over the moon when I got to go to dunnes for a 30 min wander, such was my cabin fever.

I was terrified at the thought of going out, outside of my comfort zone with a brand new baby, but I knew I needed to get used to it or I'd probably risk my mental well being. You go from hopping in the car, nipping up to the shops, and being able to dilly-dally at your leisure for decades before you have the baby. Then this baby, this tiny thing comes into your life, wholly dependent on you. You are almost afraid to go for a shower in case you don't hear the monitor. I remember going to the mother and baby group up the road was a massive expedition in planning with feeds, nappies, nap schedules, etc. The logistics in loading up the car to go to the grandparents for the weekend was nuts! But the sooner you do it, the more confident you become as a mum. (and a dad.)

Its good for babies to be out in fresh air, getting used to accompanying mum on her daily routine, whatever that is. It adds structure to the day, a bit of a purpose. For mum - someone who only a few weeks ago could come and go as she pleased, its vital that she does not feel isolated and alone, that she feels as free to come and go as before.

And as for fashion accessory? Why not? I thought my baby was the most gorgeous child I had ever seen, still do. Why not get a boost from admiring glances and lovely old ladies complimenting you on your little one. I loved the days when I dressed the baby in something cosy and adorable, I put on a bit of makeup and hopped the bus for a wander in town, looking like I had my sh!t together if I didnt really feel it, even if inside, I was bricking it a bit that he'd kick off, or that I'd have to breastfeed in a hurry.

I have a two year old now, and its a lot tougher now to go to the shops for a quick run around getting groceries, when you have a toddler who howls to get out of the buggy, who's favourite word is "no" and when you tell them to stay put while you are paying for your groceries take it as a challenge to bolt for the automatic doors right onto the road. And throw a tantrum when you scoop them up and try to put them back in the buggy or car.

So let them out and about when baby is still portable and sleeps. :pac:

Emmadilema123

minusthebear wrote: »

Is it just me or is a 4 week old baby too young to be carted around in the car to relations/shops etc etc. Just seems very fragile to me at that age to be out and about like a fashion accessory.

I feel a bit bad for you here because you are totally out numbered lol I hated dragging both mine out in their early weeks for anything other than walks around the area so I understand where your coming from. In some countries it's the norm for new mothers to stay indoors with baby for first 4 weeks so I'd say what you feel is very natural on some level. In a few more weeks you will be over it.

4 weeks is still tiny and it's especially stressful on your first. The fact that you don't spend as much time with baba as your partner means that your partners confidence regarding your child's sturdiness and capabilities has probably come a lot quicker.