Tuesday 'Uns

MonkieSocks

A man is walking past this house when a used condom comes flying out of the second story window and lands squarely on his head.

Rather disgusted and absolutely furious, he goes up to the front door and starts pounding on it.

An elderly man opens it and asks him what caused him to knock so loudly.

The passer-by asks, "Who's in your upstairs room?"

The elderly man replies, I can't see how it's any of your business.

Since, you must know, my daughter and intended son-in-law are upstairs."

The passer-by hands him the used condom and says,

"Well, I just wanted you to know that your intended grandchild fell out the window!"

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A fellow drank with friends until they closed the bar.

He staggered home about 2 o’clock and was met at the door by his wife.

She was madder than hell and wanted to know where he had been all night….

He said, ''I have been bird watching!''

She said, ''Bull sh*t!

What kind of bird is out at this time of night for you to watch??''

He said, ''A double-breasted, red-headed, mattress thrasher!''

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Scholes back, Henry back.!!!

Andre Villas-Boas must be watching Torres and wondering if Zola still has his boots handy.

BBDBB

Why did the chicken cross the road?









because it was stuffed up Anthony Worrell Thompsons jumper